More Interrupts Than Coitus
In the Cards
. . .
Summary: Felicity gets her horoscope, and a tarot reading. Everyone knows its all in the cards.
Notes: I'm still amazed that even with the current lack of updating you guys have still been reading, and alerting the story (and even some reviews! Thank you!). There's a lot I want to catch up on, writing-wise before spring semester starts, and I've got a couple of light weeks of work coming up, and being the introvert that I am I plan on spending most of my downtime writing, so if you're a regular reader of some of my other stories, there will (should) be a round of updates, and maybe even a quick one-shot. Thanks for sticking around with me for all this time, and making this story special by liking it so much. Also, thanks to everyone who sent me links to some really great Tomorrow People stories—that show is almost as addictive as Arrow! Also, in my head canon Robbie Amell would be Bruce Wayne.
. . .
Felicity was not sure how they got here, and not in the literal sense. One minute she was throwing down a copy of US Weekly and laughing about how her horoscope had warned her against getting out of bed, and the next Erica was pulling a set of tarot cards out of her bag, as naturally as she did with a pack of gum.
"That is not for real." Felicity laughed after Erica gave her a slew of predictions that were almost as amusing as the Madam Cleo commercials that used to play through her studying all-nighters in college. "Erica! Come on…"
"Make jokes all you want!" Erica retorted bluntly, frowning when Felicity didn't take the reading seriously.
Felicity averted her eyes as she tried to ignore the crazy part of Erica that she'd never seen before. God knew, she got her share of insane with Oliver, she didn't need it from her friend too. Voodoo juju was not going to solve any of her problems.
"I'm not making fun of you!" Felicity stifled a laugh as Erica swiped the cards from the table, and narrowed her eyes at her. "I'm not! I'm laughing with you!"
It was a poor save, and Erica knew it as well as she did. She should have known by now that excuse did not ever, ever work.
"Whatever." Erica said, with a roll of her eyes. "I'm just saying, my great aunt Lizzie predicted four presidents, six births, and her husband's death. I've got it, too. Everyone says so."
"Yeah, well that was easy enough." Felicity shook her head. "Didn't you say that the family insisted she poisoned his oatmeal?"
Crazy. This was what she got for thinking her friend dropped in for some girl talk. Maybe some gossip, although it might be hard to complain about her boyfriend when he was (a) their boss, and (b) a secret.
Well, it was never like she'd thought that dating Oliver Queen would be easy, but…it wasn't always easy. It was hard. Especially when the city was naming him bachelor of the year and he couldn't walk across his the club without some girl throwing herself at him.
Not that she was jealous, of course. Not at all, it was just infuriating to her, because it was so incredibly stupid.
"That is not the point!" Erica exclaimed, "No one ever proved that she did, I'll remind you of that. And you should take it seriously. This isn't like some magazine horoscope. The cards know, Felicity."
"Well, if the cards could arrange for a vanilla latte, I could really appreciate that." Felicity said, "And maybe a blueberry muffin. I missed breakfast."
Well, technically she didn't miss it, she'd heard it tick right on past her while she was directing Oliver through the subway lines at five am.
"You're going to remember this when the man shows himself into your life." Erica told her in a warning tone. "I'm telling you. It'll happen—if it hasn't already."
"That's riveting, really," Felicity told her and laughed, forcing herself to take the offending magazine and flip it over so she was only looking at the ad for some celebrity's newest fragrance. "But there isn't a man in my life Erica, really. Unless we're counting the barista who makes my coffee."
"Mmhm." Erica nodded her head skeptically, "Look, I know that I jump to conclusions sometimes—"
"Sometimes?" Felicity teased her, remembering the time her former assistant had left for coffee and didn't return until hours later because she thought she'd seen Johnny Depp buying a drink at Coffee Culture.
She wondered if the stress of the new job was getting the Erica.
Erica's skin took on a pinkish tinge as she blushed.
"You never show up for drinks on Friday nights anymore, and we never meet at lunch for coffee...it's like you're hiding from everyone. And people talk, you know that?"
"People are always going to talk." Felicity told her, recalling the poor consolation her grandmother had given her when shed been mortified after her bathing suit fell off in gym freshman year. "They'll find something else to gossip about soon enough."
She looked up at her with a raised eyebrow,
"Besides, I'm busy since I don't have an assistant anymore. I usually work through lunch-and I know you're busy too, that job isn't a cake walk-and I get so caught up with my dog...I guess I forgot about Friday nights at Blu Martini. Addy is demanding."
Felicity laughed, knowing her excuse was that—and a terrible one at that. Oliver's awful BS stories were rubbing off on her. She used to do so much better.
"Are you sure there's no guy?" Erica brandished the cards, which had claimed otherwise. "I can keep a secret."
She couldn't, but that wasn't the point. If she was going to be Oliver's go to girl and his girlfriend, they needed to keep their distance in the public eye for all sorts of reasons.
"I swear, there isn't a man in my life."
And then, almost as if Erica's supposed juju was determined to prove otherwise Oliver strode into her office, not seeming to notice that there was a third person among them.
"I brought coffee, as promised..." Oliver's voice trailed of as he saw Erica sitting with wide eyes. "It seemed like the least I could do for all the work you've been doing for me."
"No kidding." Felicity said as Oliver cleared his throat, trying to cover up the near miss. "Tell me something I haven't heard before."
"I should have knocked." Oliver said quietly.
Again, Felicity thought, why didn't he tell her something she hadn't heard before?
"Oh, no." Erica jumped to her feet and shook her head, like she was suddenly realizing she was just languishing in the middle of the day in front of the boss when she should be at work. "I should be...I've got..."
She pointed toward the door.
"I'm going to go, Felicity, just remember-it is all in the cards."
Erica turned on her heel to rush from the room, mumbling something like a hello and a goodbye to Oliver.
"It's a business meeting." Felicity called after Erica, then groaned in her hands as Oliver nudged the door shut.
He turned back to her and grinned brightly, like they hadn't been up all night together. And not in any kind of pleasant way.
"I had four hours of sleep last night, Oliver. So don't be cute."
"I can't help it. It just comes naturally."
He handed her the cup.
"Two pumps of vanilla, extra foam, and Carmel drizzle."
Felicity took a sip and gave him an approving look. Certainly the most important thing in any relationship was to know each other's coffee order.
"And you think I don't listen to you." Oliver murmured with a smile.
She saw the small brown bag in his hand and was surprised, "if that's a blueberry muffin I may need to rethink my life philosophy."
Maybe there was something to that card business.
"Sorry, but it's actually a hard drive I need you to crack. If you're hungry I can order some breakfast."
Felicity sighed and shook her head even though a bagel would almost be enough to sell her soul.
"So," Oliver said, with a smile slowly creeping over his face as she looked the drive over. "I couldn't help overhearing some of that conversation."
"Of course not." Felicity rolled her eyes. "How could you?"
She should have known he was playing stupid pretending he didn't know Erica was sitting there. And just once, would it be so hard for him to bring her something that wasn't riddled with bullet hole or that didn't have an arrow in it?
"Well, I should have known your crazy was bound to surface sooner or later." Oliver chuckled, glancing back to make sure the door was shut. "Madame Cleo seemed to be in a tizzy."
"Hey, buddy, I wouldn't be laughing if I were you. Apparently I'm going to make a connection with a guy who's tall, dark, and handsome."
Felicity laughed, as she teased him.
"And that is a bill that you just don't fit."
Oliver didn't miss a beat, as they bantered back and forth
"I'm not saying she's a great psychic, or even that she should leave her day job. I'm just saying, she might be half good. She did get two out of three."
God, he could be so smug and infuriating sometimes!
Felicity picked up the magazine from her desk, reaching over and whacking Oliver with it for trying to be so clever. Wasn't he just in a precious mood today?
"You think so, huh?"
"Apparently sixty-three percent of Starling thinks so." Oliver swiped the magazine and pointed to the cover, naming him most eligible bachelor.
"Easy enough since they don't know you." Felicity shot back as she took the drive and plugged it into her laptop.
She couldn't wait for all this bachelor business to dissipate and go back to their standard bill of problems. Like murders, and kidnappings, and drugs, and ghosts, and…anything else that this city threw at them.
Because really, wasn't that enough anyways? Their lives were crazy. Like she needed to get more of it dished out at them?
"Okay, I'll bite." Oliver leaned forwards in the chair and smiled at her with that dimpled grin that usually made her stomach drop, and made her forget all kinds of sense. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." Felicity shook her head as the encryption software she created started to scan the drive.
She picked up the latte, and took a sip.
"It's fine. I was up all night, and I'm tired—" She pointed her finger toward him, "And that is innocent, mister. Don't even try and twist it around on me."
"You're the one with the dirty mind." Oliver told her, his eyes sparkling like he had nothing to do with the sexual undertones of their banter. "Besides…"
Oliver cocked his head to the side and sighed as he looked her over.
"What?" Felicity was embarrassed as he stared at her like that. "Oliver! What are you doing?"
"I guess this bachelor misses his girlfriend." Oliver said.
God, she was so tempted. It would be easy, she was sure to throw everything from the desk and just go for it. She couldn't imagine what poor Reggie would think if he heard the scratching of the desk, the knocking of thinks falling to the ground, the…
Felicity swallowed, feeling overheated at the thought. Gasping.
No, it might kill the man. She had to be a decent man, he had a double cheeseburger for lunch every day. Life already wasn't being so kind to him.
"That's nice." Felicity said, nudging back away from Oliver, and teasing him mercilessly for looking so shocked and dismayed at being stopped. "But I'm afraid you don't fit the bill, Mr. Queen?"
"And you call me adorable?" Oliver rolled his eyes, "Felicity—"
Felicity shrugged, and shook her head.
"Erica made me promise I'd listen to the cards, and the cards ordered up a main course of tall, dark, and handsome."
"Too bad you don't know anyone like that." Oliver said.
"Oh, I don't know." Felicity tried to bite back the wide smile that threatened to ruin everything. "There's always Tommy Merlyn."
Before she could laugh, Oliver's hand brushed across her face and lifted her mouth towards his and kissed her with a spark that surprised her as his hand lingered at the nape of her neck, and she realized that the cards didn't know everything.
"I thought we established this, I'm the guy for you." Oliver grinned as he stepped back, "Besides, I'm taller than Tommy."
Oliver. Felicity felt her cheeks burn after the kiss that left a fire in her mouth, and stomach, and left her wanting more.
Maybe she should have taken that magazine's advice and stayed in bed today.