Title: Carbon Copy
Characters: Riley, assorted
Disclaimer: Not mine. Duh. Keep all rabid mice away from me, plzkthnx.
Teaser: Selected emails and text messages between Riley Poole and Hadley Young saved over one year. (takes place in the Labradoodle universe so of course some pre-Ben/Riley if you squint)
Sent: 3/25 4:21 AM
What the hell? The arctic circle?
I THOUGHT YOU WERE KIDDING.
Sent: 4/13 1:19 AM
I don't know what pisses me off more— that you're now rich enough to buy a goddamn Ferrari or the fact that I know you're going to hide all your extra money in your stupid mattress so somebody can steal it.
Or maybe it's the fact that Mom keeps bragging about it and it stopped being cute two days ago.
PS: TELL ME ABOUT THE BEN GUY.
Sent: 4/13 1:25 AM
1) Banks are not secure. I have told you this before.
2) I have nothing to say to your mother about what I did or did not do.
3) By the way, how the HELL did the crazy Ian guy GET MY NAME? Tell your mom to call me.
4) You will not be TOUCHING my car.
PS: Ben is not my boyfriend.
PPS: Tell my dad to CHECK HIS EMAIL.
Sent: 4/13 1:54 AM
Look, I can use the number keys, too, :-D
1) Your dad says to use the phone like a sane person.
2) He's your type. Squared. Because you're a Poole AND a Young so you're extra weird and get extra hot over meeting someone smarter than you. Hold on, I have a list! I'll c/p the last few!
a) Irene: history major
b) Trey: mathematician
c) Rick: that engineer guy from MIT
d) Yvonne: worked at a museum, you know, WHERE THEY KEEP ALL THE HISTORY
e) Fiona: geologist
f) Weird Gates guy: history geek. And Google says he has a degree in engineering, too.
Did your eyes fall out of your head when you saw him? Because I know you have a thing for hot women and not-so-hot men and he looks like someone's grandpa. He even has grandpa glasses, Riley. You can do so much better. I know you can. Plus, he told you not to take more money and YOU DID IT. Clearly you need to get some. How long has it been since you had sex? You're filthy rich now, go get some. But PLEASE not someone who dresses like a grandpa.
PS: Put the money up, Riley, or I will steal it myself.
Sent: 4/15 2:13 AM
Nothing will be developing.
Sent: 4/15 2:31 AM
You have ice cream, right?
Sent 5/21 2:43 AM
I'll be up soon. Promise.
Sent: 7/05 12:01 AM
Happy birthday, 3
Mom said she sent a package but doesn't know if it'll get there today.
I sent you fireworks, :-D
That's right, you love me.
Sent: 7/05 3:09 AM
Yes, I do.
Sent: 7/15 4:23 PM
TELL MY DAD TO CHECK HIS EMAIL LIKE AN ADULT.
YOU KNOW. DAILY.
Sent: 7/16 3:27 AM
Your dad says to use a phone like a real person.
Sent: 8/09 5:31 PM
Your dad is PO'd and he keeps turning the evil eye on me and I can't dodge it. I feel it through the walls and poor Natasha is hiding under the couch.
My soul, Riley, he is burning my soul with his eyes.
It's not like I had much soul left to lose, damn it.
He says that you said that you'd come up for dinner a month ago and now you're avoiding him.
Save me, Riley, save me. And bring your car.
Sent: 10/02 2:11 PM
It's been months, Riley.
You said you'd be up for dinner three months ago.
Three months, son.
And let's not forget your promises to visit for almost a year before that.
Just tell me you shaved that fuzz off your face, make me a happy man.
Sent: 10/02 9:52 PM
I'll be up soon.
Sent: 11/19 2:43 AM
I really need Mom's notes.
Dad says your mom took some when the stuff was split up— can you get anything for me?
Sent: 11/19 9:34 AM
Your dad is still glaring at me. Do I have to kidnap you to get you up here?
Sent: 11/19 10:51 AM
My mother's notes, Hadley.
Send me mom's notes.
Don't force me to be the bad guy.
Sent: 11/19 1:09 PM
Sent: 11/19 1:23 PM
I have a copy of that video of you in the bar the night you turned twenty-one on this computer.
Yes, Hadley, that video.
I will email it to everyone you know if I do not get a response on Mom's notes in three hours.
He really hated that biker you were dating, didn't he?
Sent: 11/19 3:05 PM
The scans of what I could find are enclosed.
Sending the papers express when I dig the rest out.
Sent: 11/19 3:17 PM
I love you, too.
Sent: 11/19 3:18 PM
Sent: 12/01 12:48 AM
Your dad says you're really doing the book.
You're really doing the book?
Sent: 12/11 4:26 AM
I know you're on the computer, Riley.
Because you're always on the computer.
I know you're there.
Sent: 12/12 1:29 AM
I'm getting all of these read receipts, by the way.
Sent: 12/25 5:58 AM
Can't get up there this year.
You should have gotten my gifts, already got yours stacked up down here.
Merry Christmas, Hadley.
Calling Dad to talk to him when he wakes up.
TEXT RECEIVED 12/25
HADLEY: love you too
Sent: 12/31 11:35 PM
Call your dad.
Sent: 1/01 3:49 PM
Sent: 1/24 1:28 AM
We can't get in touch with Mom.
Last talked to her in Italy.
Sent: 1/25 4:12 AM
In Egypt, says to have a room ready, she's going to visit when she gets back.
Sent: 1/25 4:16 AM
Sent: 2/2 12:00 AM
Happy birthday, Hadley.
Sent: 2/2 5:13 PM
HOW DID YOU KNOW?!
Sent: 2/2 5:34 PM
The links you sent every three days gave me a very vague idea.
Sent: 2/2 6:14 PM
Love you, too.
Sent: 4/09 3:17 PM
Got the book.
You're still trying too hard but I like it. Next one will be impressive, 3
Mom sends her love.
Sent: 4/09 4:01 PM
I see you shaved that fuzz off your face for your picture.
Hope it's still off your face when you come up for dinner.
Which will be soon.
Sent: 4/16 9:03 AM
So now you helped find the City of Gold? Bad enough about the Templar Treasure but THE CITY OF GOLD, TOO? Why did I get no phone call? No e-mail? NOT EVEN A TEXT? And you helped steal the President? After the whole Declaration thing? When you decided to pop your Young cherry, you went all out, didn't you? You should have waited for me. Mom has FLIPPED, called me as soon as she heard, wants to see you NOW. CALL HER.
MOM THINKS YOU SAW THE BOOK.
DID YOU SEE THE BOOK?
SHE WANTS TO KNOW WHAT WAS ON PAGE 47.
WHAT THE HELL WAS ON PAGE 47?!
TEXT MESSAGES RECEIVED 4/25
HADLEY: stop ignoring me
RILEY: stop e-mailing me
HADLEY: call mom
HADLEY: u r hurting her 3
RILEY: stop using chatspeak
RILEY: and capslock
HADLEY: lol NO
HADLEY: btw who is jackie? over ur crush i c :-D
RILEY: i hate you
HADLEY: i h8 U 2, 3
HADLEY: ps telling ur dad :D
Sent: 4/25 12:31 PM
Riley Walter Poole, call your aunt. Better yet, see her. Get back to me and I'll set it up. Do it now.
Dinner, Riley. Or I will come to Washington and find you. I will throw you over my shoulder and bring you back up here. You know I will. Just dinner. That's all I'm asking. Your cousin and I miss you, and Lindsay wants to have a real conversation with you, like a real person.
We're not asking a lot.
PS: Hadley mentioned a Jackie. Feel free to bring her up if you'd like.
TEXT MESSAGES RECEIVED 4/25
RILEY: u tattled
HADLEY: i luv u 2
RILEY: U TATTLED
HADLEY: riley walter poole
RILEY: hadley eustacia young
HADLEY: shut up
To: apoole, hyoung
Sent: 5/03 8:16 AM
Coming up this weekend.
Love you lots.