Author's note: I don't own anything. And the beginning of the story is kind of slow, so please bear with me. I promise it will get better!
Tris' POV (10 year's old)
Where is he? He should be here by now. I look around the corner, hoping he would be there.
"Boo!" someone behind me whispers.
"Jeez Tobias, you almost scared me half to death!" I whisper, after seeing who it is. Tobias is one of my only friends here in Abnegation. He seemed different, like me, and so for a few months now, we've been sneaking out late at night, and meeting each other.
When we first met, and started to become good friends, he told me how he finds it hard sometimes to be completely selfless. He said he wants to help people, but he feels like he's losing himself here. I understood what he meant; I always feel out of place here. I love sneaking glances at myself in a window or a puddle. I guess I'm not cut out to be Abnegation.
It was his idea, to start sneaking out like this. He said it was going to be fun, but I was still scared of my parents finding out. He had this idea, where he wanted to teach himself things that we don't do in Abnegation. He wanted to be like those Dauntless kids we see at school sometimes. They always look scary to me, but he says they're not afraid of anything, and he wants to be like them. I wish I didn't have any fears. He said he could help me become fearless like them, so I tagged along that first night he snuck out.
He took me down the block, and to the edge of Abnegation, the farthest I've ever been in this direction. School's the other way, so I never had a reason to come over here. He said nobody ever comes over here.
That first night, when we got to our now secret meeting place, he took out a throwing knife from his pocket. I still have no idea where he got it, of course he won't tell me. He said he wanted to teach himself how to throw it, but the Abnegation in him said that was selfish, so he had the brilliant idea of being selfless by teaching me how to throw them, and I'll teach him how to throw them. Then we won't have to worry about being selfish. Seemed fine by me.
So for weeks we practice throwing the knife, and eventually we became pretty good, if you ask me. Then we went on to things like fighting, and even just cardio things. Some nights it was hard; sneaking out in the middle of the night, after our parents went to bed, then getting home late, and then getting up for school the next day. But I loved every second of it. It made me feel better about myself, and it made me feel like I could be more than just boring old Beatrice.
I know, it seems like a lot for a couple of Abnegation kids to be doing, but it was all Tobias's ideas; I just went along with him.
"Oh come on Bea, you knew I was going to come; I always do," he says, setting up a few targets for us to throw at. Tonight we're going to throw a few knives at cardboard targets; things that won't make too much noise when we hit them. We've been lucky and still haven't gotten caught. It's been a while since we've thrown knives, so I'm kind of excited.
"I know, but still," I say, grabbing one of the knives. I've become pretty good at throwing these, even though I'm just ten. Mom always said I was a quick learner.
"Ok, we can't be out too late, my dad has been acting strange; I hope he doesn't know what we've been doing," he says. He's mentioned his dad being weird lately a few times; I wonder what's going on.
I forget about everything as I get ready to throw the knife. As I hold the knife in my hand, I can't shake the feeling that it seems to belong there; I love the way it feels in my hand. It always makes me feel like I was born into the wrong faction.
I grip the knife, and then throw it at the target, hitting it close to the center. I still haven't hit the middle, but oh well.
"Nice one Bea, it won't be too long til you hit the middle," Tobias says, smiling.
"Oh yea, then I'll be as good as you." He never seems to miss the middle anymore.
There have been a couple close calls with us coming out here every night. One night, we were trying hand-to-hand combat, well it's mostly just in slow motion so we don't get bruises or anything, but I tripped over something and cut my hand when I caught myself. Normally it wouldn't be hard to hide anything, because of the clothes we wear in Abnegation, but on the hand it was hard to keep hidden. Luckily, it healed quickly and nobody saw it, and that means there were no questions asked about it.
After a while of throwing the knives; yes knives, as in plural, Tobias has gotten a few more since we started doing this, whatever this is, we decided to head back home for the night. I couldn't shake the feeling that something about this night was strange, that something was going to happen. Tobias was acting a little strange, but he's a boy, and they do that sometimes. We say goodbye as I head to my house.
I wish I had known that he didn't want to hang out with me anymore. I still went to our spot every night, for a week; each night he never showed up. I tried to talk to him at school, but he had said to never mention our little get-togethers at school, or anywhere. He became distant, and started to not talk to me. I wonder what I did to make him hate me.
It's been years since I last talk to Tobias. After he became distant, we stopped hanging out, and stopped talking altogether. I never saw him at school, but that isn't surprising since we are two years apart. The last I heard of him was he transferred out of Abnegation, which isn't surprising either since he hated it here.
I became a different person after he changed. I went back to being the Abnegation girl everyone thought I should be. I acted the part, but on the inside I was dying to get out. I couldn't wait any longer for this day; the Choosing Ceremony. I can finally be the person I want to be; on the inside and out.
So what do you think? I know it's different, and this is just the back story to help get the background set up. But please review and let me know your thoughts as to where you think this is going to go! Thanks!