[The Best Man was originally written as a standalone short fic years ago, but I recently thought of a way to continue it. This story begins immediately after the bachelor party in the first fic, then continues for 3 seasons until Michael and Gob reunite in season 4.]
After Michael and Gob did it again that morning, there was a knock on the door and they had to get out of bed. Gob grabbed a hotel robe and threw it to Michael, while he gathered up the scattered clothes on the floor. "That's probably my wife. Can you hide in the bathroom?"
Michael disliked being treated like a dirty little secret Gob had to hide. Technically, that's what he was, but still... they were family.
Gob hurried to dress in the clothes that his wife had picked out for him the other day. He hated the bright sweaters and khakis, but she liked them. "Oh wait," he said, getting an idea. "We'll just say that you did it with the stripper instead, and I watched. That stripper didn't get murdered right?" He was trying to recall how George Sr.'s frame up plan fell apart.
Michael raised his eyebrows at the thought that "I watched" was supposed to be an innocent explanation for his wife. He confirmed, "Yeah, the stripper left, and so did everybody else."
"Uncle Gob?" George Michael's voice called from the front door, and Michael ducked under the blankets in panic.
"Coming." Gob finally went to answer the door. "Hey, George Michael."
"Hi, sorry to wake you. I was just wondering if my dad was still here."
Gob didn't let him into the room. "Yeah, Michael's sleeping it off." The time was now nearly 10 o'clock, and he smiled. "It was a great party."
"Really? I thought it ended early. That's what Uncle Buster said last night."
"Sure, we had to get rid of him after all that juice he drank. But me and Michael stayed and had fun." He added, "And there was the stripper. We got her back."
George Michael shrugged, glad that his father had fun, but he didn't need to hear the details. "Well, when he gets up, tell him that I decided to go home with Buster. It's too late to go fishing now, and I didn't really want to anyway."
"Yeah Michael's no fun at fishing." Gob remembered that Michael always needed seasick patches on the choppy ocean.
"So I'll see him at home. Bye."
"Bye." Gob then shut the door and returned to the bedroom. "That was George Michael."
"Yeah I heard." Michael felt somewhat guilty about missing the fishing trip, but also relieved because he hated fishing. He'd only booked the trip to prove that he was a fun guy, and because he was hurt that Gob hadn't invited him to the bachelor party.
Taking off the robe, Michael went to the bathroom to take a shower, and Gob followed, to watch him. He was very casual about it and didn't pretend that he was there for anything else. He felt this was a new privilege that he was naturally entitled to, since sleeping with his brother. Michael didn't object, and he asked if Gob wanted to join him.
Gob thought about it, but stopped when he looked at the sweater he was taking off. "No, wait. My wife will be here soon."
"Yeah we were gonna have another ceremony and do it finally. Hmm, but I wonder if Dad canceled everything after Ira got away." (The ceremony was just for show, since they'd already been married for two weeks, and George Sr. just wanted to set up the accountant.)
"If he didn't, then your wife did." Gob really seemed to have forgotten much of last night, even Michael's previous explanation about his wife. So Michael turned off the water and told him again, "Gob, you don't remember this because you hit your head or something, but your wife already came by last night."
"She did? When?" Gob stepped closer and looked concerned. "She didn't catch us together, did she?"
Michael shook his head. "No, she left before we had sex."
He looked relieved. "What happened?"
Michael shrugged and pointed to his bruised cheek. "I'm not really sure, because you punched me, but before I was knocked out, she said something about wanting out of the marriage, because she's in love with your brother."
"What?!" Gob was shocked. "Michael, you didn't-!"
"No, no, of course not."
"But I asked you to steal her-"
"Yes, but I didn't, Gob. I barely talked to her at all before you told me you were going to stay with her." He was starting to be annoyed that Gob was so concerned about his runaway wife.
Gob looked puzzled. "Then she meant Buster?" That didn't seem likely.
"Or maybe she meant Tobias. You know, I noticed at Mom's cocktail party that she kept talking to him about-"
"Tobias? That's crazy." Gob laughed. "He's gay."
Michael nodded and realized something. "She definitely has a type."
Gob was still laughing. He leaned in and kissed Michael, then said, "Look, I gotta go talk to her and find out what's going on. I'll see you later."
"What? Gob, wait! Can't you just call her?" Or better yet they could just discuss an annulment through lawyers, he hoped.
Gob said, "I won't be long. Then we can have more fun, Mikey." He spoke in a suggestive, sexy way, but closed the door and left.
Michael was confused and worried that Gob somehow thought he could keep both his wife and Michael. He hoped that Gob just wasn't thinking clearly due to his head injury. He would have to see if Gob was all right later. In the meantime he had to finish his shower and check out of both hotel rooms, it seemed.