Dear Fanfiction 20

Dear Fanfiction,

I'm not that old. My grandmother is still alive. Also, I like smart girls. I don't like girls who are wild and crazy. From time to time I'll have fun. But remember, I'm busy with work.

Also, if we get married, you won't be hearing about my first wife. Maybe if we become good friends, I'll tell you. What?

Do you expect me to be like: "Hey, did you know that I had a 1st wife, and if she never died, I probably wouldn't be having children with you?"

It's so idiotic.

Please, stop making the main character faint every twelve seconds just to come see me. She's (or he's in some weird cases) a farmer. Why the Harvest Goddess did she take the job with such low stamina? If she gives me the "saving the Harvest Goddess" excuse, I'm sending her into rehab.

Sincerely, Jin

p.s Why am I suddenly related to Van the merchant?

Star: Sorry it's been a while! I got this request some time ago, and I just found out how I could do it. Jin, get in the van. I don't have Van the merchant. I have Van your son. MWUAHAHA –chokes-

~Star out