Author's Note: This is a story I've been toying with for a while but kept putting off. Thanks for the AnimeSuki Forum members for helping to end my indecisiveness problem (again). For some reason having Touma have a hellish day filled with misfortune has always seemed like an awesome and funny idea to me. Originally it was going to be a one shot, then a two shot, then a three shot, and now I'm planning on doing 12 chapters. One for each hour, like in 24 (which I've never actually seen). I hope to do really fast updates (I wrote this in a day because I was off) so everybody cross your fingers.


The worst day of Kamijou Touma's life began at exactly noon, because of nothing more than a casual encounter on a street.

Before that point it wasn't that special of a day. He had woken up in his bathtub like usual, shared a breakfast with Index, cleaned a little, and did some other things. Nothing he did was outside of his normal morning routine. After eating breakfast he spent the rest of the morning watching TV with Index and lazing around the house. It was exactly what was to be expected of a normal high schooler to do on a Saturday morning.

When he went to prepare lunch he had noticed that the supplies in his fridge were running extremely low. While what remained would surely be enough to feed him for a few days it wouldn't last Index even one. Therefore he made Index a quick lunch out of the leftovers and decided that he should run out to the supermarket. He had nothing to do that day so he decided to go to the supermarket that was farther away but was currently having a large sale.

It was on his walk to the supermarket that Touma noticed somebody he knew turn a corner in front of his and begin walking the same direction he was. It was his classmate Seiri Fukiyose, known as the 'Iron Wall' girl by his fellow classmates. Without thinking much about it Touma called out to her. If he had only known that he could have saved her and himself a lot of trouble by not initiating a conversation with her he would have simply let her go on her way. "Fukiyose!" He said as he sped up his walking pace.

"Kamijou?" Fukiyose asked. "What the heck are you doing here?" She asked suspiciously.

"I'm just going to the supermarket." Kamijou said dismissively. Recently Kamijou had been disappearing frequently from school for various reasons, and he had missed out on much of the Ichihanaransai preparations due to a huge incident involving Gremlin. Because of this Fukiyose was obviously more than a little annoyed with him.

Fukiyose gave him a slightly indignant look and started walking. With nothing else to do Kamijou fell into step beside her. "What supermarket are you going to?" She asked him.

"This one here." He said, pointing to a map he was consulting on his cellphone. "It's having a sale today so I'm heading there."

"Really?" Fukiyose asked. "That's not too far from where I live so I suppose I might as well go there too."

Touma nodded and the two of them walked the next few blocks together in silence before Touma said. "Actually Fukiyose, don't you normally only buy those weird health foods? I don't know if this supermarket will have anything like that."

Fukiyose opened her mouth to reply with something else but before she could get any sound out another voice stepped in and cut her off.

"Hello there." A teenage male announced as approached them from the front. He looked around the same age as Touma and Fukiyose and was incredibly attractive. He was a blond foreigner who could easily have been a model or a movie star. He was dressed in designer clothing and walked like he expected people to move out of his way automatically.

When Fukiyose didn't answer him Touma began to panic a little wondering if he had known the man before he had lost his memories. "Hello." He said a little awkwardly.

"It's a pleasure to meet you." The man said, accidentally dispelling Touma's fears. "My name is Edward Smith."

"What do you want?" Fukiyose asked with suspicion. "Are you trying to sell us something?"

The man looked hurt at her remark. "Not at all. I just felt like having a conversation with you…Miss…?"

"Seiri Fukiyose." Fukiyose told him with no small bit of annoyance.

The simple act of Fukiyose sharing her name seemed to give the man far more pleasure than it should have. He smiled widely and for a split second Touma could have sworn that the smile was rather malicious, but at a second glance it was a normal smile. "Thank you. It's always such a pleasure to learn the name of a woman as beautiful as you are." Despite obviously being a foreigner his Japanese was perfectly fluent.

Fukiyose seemed pleased by the compliment although she did not blush shyly like a girl in an anime would have. "Do you always go up and randomly introduce yourself to strangers?" She asked him.

"Of course. How else would I manage to learn the names of so many people?" He laughed loudly at his own joke, but Touma and Fukiyose were only confused by what he found so funny. "So what's your name?" He asked Touma.

"Kamijou." Touma said simply. He started walking again in the hopes that the man would leave to go bother somebody else but the man simply kept following them. He chatted with them as they walked and Touma found him to be rather likeable, charming, and funny. When Touma took a shortcut through an alleyway the man seemed to be oddly pleased.

"What's your full name Kamijou-san?" Edward asked with a reassuring smile. "Where I come from it's considered rude to not tell somebody your full name when meeting them."

Touma felt a little uneasy about the man about the man but he didn't see any harm in replying. "Kamijou Touma." He said.

With those two simple words all of the warmth left the man's face and he started looking at Touma and Fukiyose like they were pieces of meat. "Seiri Fukiyose and Kamijou Touma." He intoned. Fukiyose's eyes glazed over and she stopped walking. She looked wrong. Fukiyose was a woman who was always full of energy, always ready to do something or explode in anger. Now however she merely stood there staring at nothing with a blank look in the eye. For some reason it reminded Touma of the blank stare of one of the Misaka sisters. "Sheesh, Richard wouldn't stop telling me that it would be hard to hunt in Academy City and that I would have to be careful. What a joke. No matter what prey are prey." Edward said. He was not speaking to Touma, merely casually talking to himself. In fact he was paying Touma absolutely no attention at all.

"What the hell did you do?" Touma asked him.

Edward was so surprised by the sound of Touma speaking it took him a second to register that it was in fact Touma who had spoken. "Did you just… speak?" He said incredulously.

"Just answer me." Touma demanded. "What the hell did you do to Fukiyose?"

The man just scowled. "Kamijou Touma." He said. Nothing happened. "Kamijou Touma, Kamijou Touma, Kamijou Touma." Every time he said Touma's name he grew more and more frustrated. "What the hell? Did you lie to me about your name or something?"

"Stop talking nonsense! Are you some sort of mind controlling esper!? Or are you a magician!?"

"Tch, so there's people in Academy City who know about magic too huh?"

"Just answer me damn iiiitttttt!" Kamijou shouted. He swung his right fist at the magician and it connected perfectly. The sound of shattering glass filled the air as Touma's Imagine Breaker broke whatever spell the man had been using. Edward went flying backwards and fell to the ground.

"Kamijou Touma!" This time it wasn't Edward saying his name but Fukiyose. Inexplicably she ran in front of Touma and held her arms out in an exaggerated pose to stop him from advancing on Edward. "What the hell are you doing!?"

"Fukiyose!" Touma shouted. He was too relieved to even be upset at her misunderstanding. "Are you okay?"

"Okay? What the hell are you talking about? Why did you suddenly attack Edward?"

"Seiri Fukiyose."

Once again the mere mention of her name was enough to drive all emotion from Fukiyose. She let her arms fall back to her sides and continued her blank stare.

Touma scowled at the sight. "You bastard!" He yelled. He had no idea what group the magician belonged to, or why he was doing this, but he didn't care. All that mattered to Touma was that somebody was suffering in front of him.

"Stop him." Edward commanded.

Fukiyose head butted Touma without hesitation. Her face was no longer emotionless, but full of tranquil fury, like she had looked when he had walked in on her changing during the Daihaseisai. Touma couldn't bring himself to try and hit her back. Mercilessly she continued to rain blows down on Touma, not stopping until an angry voice commanded "Stop." When it did she stopped in mid punch, and held completely still. It was like she had been frozen in time.

"You bastard." Edward said. He stared at Touma with naked contempt. His lip was bleeding from the punch Touma had given him and he was now giving off the impression of an angry child. "Step back." He commanded Fukiyose and she did so wordlessly. He stomped over to Touma and punched him in the face as hard as he could.

Touma ignored the punch. It had been pitifully weak.

His answering punch however wasn't. The spell was once again broken, and Edward spat out blood.

"Gah!" Edward cried out. "Who the hell do you think you are? Do you have any idea who I am!?"

"What the hell is this?" Fukiyose said in confusion. She took one look at Touma and hesitated when she saw the determination in his face. "Kamijou?" She asked. Fukiyose viewed Touma as a lazy unmotivated student, so seeing him fired up must have been very shocking to her.

"Seiri Fukiyose." Edward muttered. He was so angry Touma was surprised it came out so clearly instead of as a snarl. "We're leaving. Follow me." He ordered. Then he glared at Touma and held up his hand. "There's no point in going to too much trouble to get someone like you."

Something invisible shot out of his hand and hit Touma directly in his left leg. Touma's leg collapsed from under him and he lost all feeling in it. For a split second he thought that his spine had been damaged but as soon as he touched his right hand to his leg he was suddenly able to move again. "Screw you!" He shouted at the backs of the fleeing Fukiyose and Edward. "You think I'll just let you get away with this!?"

He ran after them and it quickly became apparent he would catch up to them. Touma wasn't a professional runner but for literally as long as he could remember he had been very good at it. He knew Fukiyose was just as athletic if not more and he might have not been able to catch her but Edward was another story. The man quickly ran out of breath from his sprint and had to drop down to a very slow jog. He had not paced himself like a professional would have, and was suffering for it.

However just before Touma could grab on to Edward and beat the stuffing out of him his misfortune kicked in.

An explosion of pure force appeared directly in between Touma and Edward sending both of them flying in opposite directions. Touma's right hand had been held upwards to grab the taller Edward's neck, so his Imagine Breaker had been unable to stop the sudden explosion.

He hit the ground five meters away and was right back to his feet. Ten meters away Edward was being pulled to his feet by Fukiyose and the two of them scrambled off.

Touma was unable to follow them. His way was blocked by a middle aged male wearing a nice suit. However the suit did not make the man look respectable as he was also covered in tattoos everywhere skin was visible and he had several piercings. He looked at Touma's angry expression and muttered with some amusement "So here you are. I suppose you really are misfortunate."

"Are you working with that guy!?" Touma demanded. Edward and Fukiyose had already left his field of vision and he didn't want to lose them so he had no patience at the moment.

The man shrugged. "No. I don't actually even know who he is. But he was fighting you so… I just thought it would be funny to let him get away."

"You…" Touma growled. He clenched his right fist and charged at the man.

This time multiple explosions occurred at once. Instinctually Touma managed to block the one in front of him with his right hand but that was not the only one. Explosions occurred above him, behind him, and to either side of him as well. Not only could he not block the attacks he couldn't even dodge them. The forces of the simultaneous explosions gave Touma whiplash as they knocked him around like a rag doll.

"Weaknesses." The strange tattooed man said, as if he was idly philosophizing and not beating Touma to a pulp for seemingly no reason. "Everybody has them. Even that odd right hand of yours everyone is always talking about has plenty. I originally wanted to kill you with some guns but it's unexpectedly hard to use them without training. So I just decided it was easier to attack you with multiple people at once. After all you can only block one thing at a time."

The multiple explosions occurred again. This time Touma thrust his hand upwards and blocked that explosion. However he was still thrown around by the remaining four explosions. "Multiple… people?" He coughed out.

"Ah, my compatriots." The man said. "They're hiding in the surrounding buildings. Their attacks can still reach you but this way you can't reach them. Pretty ingenious right? I pride myself on simple solutions to big problems."

"Why are you doing this?" Touma asked. "What the hell kind of excuse can you have to allow Fukiyose to just get captured like that!?"

"Fukiyose? The girl? She seemed to be leaving of her own free will to me. Well it's not like I care. She'll be dead by tomorrow anyways."

"…Dead?" Touma said after a stunned silence.

"Yes."

"Like hell!" Touma shouted. Ignoring his injuries he raised his right hand and once again charged at the man in front of him.

The explosions occurred again but Touma didn't show any sort of hesitation. If he done so just once he would have been destroyed. He reached out with his right hand and destroyed the explosion in front of himself with a gesture. He was still hit by the other explosions of course but this time when he was thrown forward he landed on his feet and didn't stop his charge. His right fist hit the man square in the jaw and the man lost his casual expression.

Touma knew that that shouldn't have worked the way he did. No matter how good his balance was he should have been unable to land smoothly. The explosion that had occurred above him the other two times had for some reason not occurred.

The man with the nice suit and multiple tattoos seemed to have realized it too. "So those damn dogs finally caught up to us huh?"

A loud battle cry came from one of the nearby buildings and a figure jumped from a window and landed in front of Touma. This figure wielding a spear proceeded to attack the man in the suit, who barely managed to dodge it. The figure was about to swing it's spear again when it was suddenly thrown back by an unseen explosion. The entire exchange took about five seconds.

Touma's mind registered that the figure was Itsuwa at the exact moment that her breasts collided with his face and both of them went flying backwards.

"Stop." The man said as Touma and Itsuwa embarrassingly disentangled themselves. "It's too late now. If the Amakusa have already arrived it's not really a pre-emptive strike." He was holding his ear as he spoke, obviously using a spiritual item to communicate with his comrades. "We'll retreat for now."

""Get back here!"" Touma and Itsuwa yelled as one. They both charged at the man but neither of them were able to reach him before he suddenly jumped straight up and vanished in mid-air.

"Flight magic!?" Itwsuwa said. She muttered a spell under her breath but whatever she casted obviously didn't work. "No, that was just a jump." She scolded herself.

"Itsuwa!?" Touma said, finally realizing how odd it was for her to be here. "What are you doing in Academy City? Who were those people?"

Itsuwa looked strangely happy despite having just been in a fight. "It's nice to see you again," She told him as she started breaking up her spear.

"You too… Sorry Itsuwa but I have to go." Touma told her. He couldn't abandon Fukiyose like this. He would have to call anti-skill and have them track the two through security cameras. They didn't believe in magic but it would be simple enough to tell them Edward was a telepathic esper.

"What happened?" She asked, suddenly serious again.

He told her and her face darkened for a while but lit up with understanding when he mentioned how Edward had controlled Fukiyose by saying her name. "So this is where they ran to…" She muttered.

"Ran to?"

"Um… I can't remember their name but it's a very famous story in England. There used to be a very large magic cabal in England that had been around for a few hundred years. There are many stories about the true name of something granting you power over it, and those magicians used that to enslave people. It was a very powerful group with hundreds of members. They even managed to fight off some saints according to some stories."

"Is there really some magic as convenient as just having to say someone's name to enslave them?"

"Apparently the spell requires the exact name, the same way the person in question pronounces it. So they can't just look up names and enslave people like that."

Touma realized that that was why Edward had been so insistent on hearing their names spoken aloud. "So what happened to them?"

"Aqua of the Back. It seems that after he became a member of God's Right Seat he attacked the cabal and left it in ruins. Only a handful of the hundreds of members were able to escape, and all the slaves were freed."

Touma gave a simple nod at that. He had experienced the power of Aqua of the Back himself before. Before the Amakusa had fought with him he had been stronger than a saint, so it was no surprise he could destroy something that even a saint couldn't.

"So these are those handful of people?" Touma asked. "Why are they in Academy City?"

"Possibly because no one would look for them here?" Itsuwa asked. "They are a very unpopular group after all and any other place they appear in they tend to get attacked by the local magic groups."

"Right. I've got to call Anti-Skill to track them."

"That won't work." Itsuwa told him sadly. "Those people are 'predators' who prey on non-magicians so they have long since developed spells to hide themselves from any sort of law enforcement."

"Damn it." Touma cursed. "Are you telling me there's no way to catch up to them?"

Itsuwa smiled at him reassuringly. "Don't worry. We Amakusa's can track them. Although they are very good at hiding from scientific tracing they can't escape from magical tracing. It will slow down our own search but this isn't something that we can just ignore."

"Your own search?" Touma asked.

"Oh," Itsuwa looked embarrassed at realizing she had not yet explained why she was there. "The Amakusa's are in town to stop a group of demon summoners that are intending to summon a demon here in Academy City. Those people we just fought should be from that cabal."

"A demon?" Touma questioned. "Do those really exist?"

"Well… I can't really say for sure whether they do or not, but a more accurate term would be to say they are intending to 'create something like a demon'."

"Create something like a demon…. Like Innocentius or Ellis?"

"Yes, but this should be on a far larger scale than that."

"Why would they do this in Academy City?" Touma questioned.

"It seems that to those magicians Academy City as the centre of the Science Side is the most evil place in the world. Therefore any demon created here will be much stronger."

"What do they want to do with a demon?"

Itsuwa gave an embarrassed shrug. "We don't know… but we doubt it is anything good for Academy City considering how they view it."

"So… why attack me?" Touma questioned. He was beginning to feel like a character from an rpg selecting dialogue options from an npc.

"They must know about your right hand. That could destroy that summoned demon with ease and since we have worked with you before, they must have targeted you in case we did so again."

"Damn it." Kamijou said.

"I'm very sorry." Itsuwa apoligized. "We got you caught up in so much trouble again. It's truly unforgivable."

"It's fine." Touma said dismissively.

Itsuwa didn't seem calmed down by his comment but she didn't bring it back up. "I'm sorry but I have to go and aid with the search. I'll call you if we need your help."

Touma only nodded as she turned and started jogging away from him.

"Such misfortune." He muttered to himself when Itsuwa was out of sight. "How am I supposed to deal with two different magic cabals on the same day?" Kamijou Touma was only one person after all. No matter how hard he tried he could only do one thing at a time. It would be exceedingly difficult for him to manage this.

Then the clock changed to 13:00.


Author's Note Continued: And so Touma's misfortunate day begins. This chapter was filled with action but expect the comedy to start next chapter.

As a side note I use a 12 hour clock but changed it to a 24 hour one for this to avoid any possible confusion.