You never should have been born!
I can't help it… I can't! It's not my fault!
I should kill you now…
I bolt straight up in my bed, gasping and clutching at the covers with white knuckles.
It was the third time this week that I had dreamt about my father and my life back in the Village of the Sand. I had to hold back tears as I got ready, remembering that Temari and Kankuro used to always wake me up before school. It was times like this that made me wish that they were still alive. They had died in a car accident two years ago, while they were driving to get me from school. I knew I shouldn't, but I blamed myself for it. I didn't usually have dreams about them, I tried to forget and lock all of my emotions up. This past week was the first time in months that I had thought about them so much. I knew it was affecting me, and I also knew I should talk to someone, but I couldn't bring myself to tell others about how I was feeling. I… I just couldn't. I've tried, but the words just wouldn't come out. So, I decided it was better not to talk at all.
I looked out the window as I got dressed, wondering what it was like to be normal for a day.
Three quick raps on the door drew me out of my thoughts. I walked down the hall to open it, already guessing who it was. As I opened the door, I thought that it would be nice to switch places with someone else for once.
"Hey, Gaara!" The cheery voice of Uzumaki Naruto blasted into my quiet home. He had decided that after my brother and sister died, that he would take care of me. Bring me meals, drive me to school, all of that crap. We were almost the same age, he was eighteen, and I was seventeen. I just didn't have enough money to get a car, and I was too antisocial to get a job.
The smiling face of my only friend, well, acquaintance in the world was looking back at me as I opened the door to my small house. His car stood out front, and I noticed that there was something shiny and box-like in the back.
I gave him a quizzical look. "What's that?" I asked, pointing to his car. I don't usually talk, but I figured I needed some way to thank this person who was keeping me alive.
His smile grew bigger. "Here," he said, handing me a covered plate. "Take this inside and I'll go get it!"
I took the plate and walked inside as he ran back out to the car. I put the food on the table and uncovered it. An omelet. My favorite food. It must have taken him ages to do this, it seemed very intricate and involved. I wonder, what's the special occasion?
He ran back inside with two silver wrapped presents in his hands. "Happy birthday, Gaara!" He shouted, placing the gifts on the table and pulling me into a bear hug.
"B-birthday?" I asked.
Oh, right. It's my eighteenth birthday.
"M-hm! I got you some presents and made you your favorite breakfast! After school, I have a surprise!"
"Surprise…?" I was shocked by how much he seemed to care. Even Temari- No. I didn't want to think about them right now. "Th-thank you." I stammered, not used to showing appreciation.
After breakfast, I began to open my presents. One of them was huge; almost the size of my fridge, and the other was small, about the size of my palm. "Hey, Gaara? I know you probably don't want to think about it, but Temari and Kankuro left you surprise presents for your eighteenth birthday, they kept them since you were ten…" Naruto looked at the floor, guessing that this would bring up unwelcome memories. He pulled out two more small gifts from his pockets, wrapped in matte red paper with golden bows.
"Mm… Thanks…" I said, moving the large one closer to me and beginning to tear off the wrapping paper. Inside was a bike. A shiny, black, twelve gear bike with a compass. I'd never had a bike before, so Naruto would probably have to teach me how to ride it. My sand would also catch me if I fell. "I… Thank you…" I said quietly, trying not to show him how much the bike had affected me.
"No problem, I've been saving up to buy you a car, but you don't seem interested in driving or saving up the money to get gas, so I got you this instead! I'll teach you how to ride it later, okay?"
I nodded and moved on to the next one, the small silver present. As I opened it, I found that I was beginning to enjoy myself. Maybe Naruto would get to see me smile for the first time in about a year. As I tore off the rest of the paper, my hands froze. This wasn't a present from Naruto, there was no way. Inside was a necklace made with a silver chain, and a locket made of more silver and rubies and yellow topaz. The outside of the locket looked almost like fire, and I opened it up to see the inside. There was a picture of me and my mother. My mother was holding me and smiling, tilting the blanket I was in so the camera could see my face. I looked like I was about two or three. And just when I was about to close it, I saw an engraving in the other lid of the locket. It read 'Gaara, I love you forever. –Mom' I closed it and held it close to my chest, up next to my heart.
Naruto put his hand on my back, and said "I talked to the Kazekage yesterday; he said he found this in the wreckage of your old home."
"Sh-she loved me…" I said, holding back tears.
"She did." Naruto said, agreeing with me. "Why don't you open the other ones?"
I picked up the present that was badly wrapped, probably Kankuro's. I tore off the paper in one swift movement, and saw a small black card. I picked it up, and read the word 'credit'.
"It has all of their savings; they wanted it to go to you." Naruto said, pointing to the piece of paper that was also in the box.
"How much?" I asked.
Naruto smiled. "100,000,000 yen! As you may know, Temari was a bit of a gambler, and with all of the fighting matches Kankuro did, well, you could say that they did pretty well for themselves."
"Oh my God… 100,000,000 yen?"
Naruto nodded again. "Now open the last one. It's Temari's."
"Mm." I took the red paper off of the last gift and saw two small slips of paper inside. I picked them up, and saw that they were cruise tickets to some foreign island I've never heard of.
"Hmhm…" Naruto had a stupid looking smile on his face, but I liked the fact that he wasn't afraid of me.
As I walked through the halls of the school, a few people waved to me, but most of them just pretended I wasn't there. I didn't bother them, so they didn't bother me. But, of course, there was the exception.
The voice of Kenshi Kotekada blasted into my thoughts as he came up to me and slung an arm around my shoulders. Kotekada was the meanest, most idiotic bully in the entire school, walking around with his "gang". They especially liked to pick on me.
I groaned and tried to slip out of his reach, but he just grabbed the hood of my red sweatshirt.
"Where do you think you're going?"
I said nothing.
"God!" he threw me across the ground. I didn't feel safe here, there was no sand or even small rocks at my disposal. "What a fucking pussy!" he stood over me, towering at six-four.
His foot connected with my side, and little black stars danced across my vision. I heard footsteps and saw that two other guys, I didn't remember their names, were walking up to me. One of them, a black haired guy wearing a neon blue sweatshirt, knelt down and grabbed me by the hair. I cried out, trying to pull away, but his hand was already shoving my head towards the concrete. I closed my eyes, hoping that he wouldn't knock me out, when he screamed and jumped off of me.
I felt something grainy under my hands, and saw Naruto standing a few feet away with a bucket of sand from the front of the school. I had unconsciously reached out to it and had used it to throw off my attacker and block my head from the ground. Standing, I sent the sand to Kotekada and slammed him into the wall. I waved Naruto to take on the other guys, and heard him begin to punch the absolute shit out of them.
I turned to Kotekada, who was now moaning in a heap beneath my feet. I didn't say anything; I just pulled my arm up, and threw my elbow into his stomach, jumping on top of him in the process.
He yelled out in pain, curling into a ball and coughing up a bit of blood. I looked down on him scornfully, spit, then turned my back to him.
Naruto came running to me, his face full of concern. "Are you okay!?" he grabbed my shoulders and began checking me for injuries. "What happened? Do they do that a lot?"
I nodded a bit, and Naruto gasped. "You're bleeding!" he said, his hands going to my head, where my tattoo was. I flinched back, I didn't like it when he touched me there, it made me uncomfortable. But he didn't seem to care; he just took off his sweatshirt and began dabbing at the blood.
"Are you hurt anywhere else?" he asked, looking into my eyes.
Standing there, so close to me, I couldn't help but notice how attractive he really was. His messy blonde hair, his endless blue eyes, and his pink lips… he smelled good, too. Almost like a forest, but mixed in with the scents of food. He smelled very, very good… I jerked my head back. What the HELL are you thinking!? He's a GUY! And on top of that, he's NARUTO for God's sake! He looked at me, astonished. I think I may have hurt his feelings. "S-sorry…" I said. "Bee." I pointed behind him, trying to cover my lapse of sanity with a lie.
"Oh." He said.
I had a lot to think about as I made my way through the forest. My house was on a large plot of land that was mostly owned by Naruto, but he let me go anywhere I wanted on it as long as I didn't take hostages and kill them, then hang them up on a tree. While tempting, I promised I wouldn't. As I came along to my favorite spot, a grove covered in sand and completely surrounded by silver Birchwood trees, I re-thought over that moment in between Naruto and me. The intensity of them moment, the space between our lips, why had that all suddenly become so noticeable to me?
I pushed through the trees and sat down on the sandy ground, letting the smooth grains comfort my restless thoughts. I laid back. I was tired, and the sand was warm. Comforting. I let my eyes close, as the songs of birds lulled me to sleep.
I dreamt, but not of my father. I dreamt that Naruto and I were standing in a room, separated by a wall of glass. I saw his face, his eyes clouded with worry. My eyes scanned the rest of the room, and I saw something in the shadows of his room. There was a large lion in the corner, about to pounce on Naruto. I pounded on the glass, trying to get him to turn, screaming at him to run. Run! RUN! Run, you idiot! Can't you see you're in danger!? He couldn't hear me, or see me, apparently. But I kept pounding on the glass, trying to break it, or send chakra through, but nothing worked. I pulled my hands back, bloody and stinging, as I watched Naruto begin to be torn apart by the golden beast.
"NO!" I shot up, breathing heavily and sweating. I felt something run down my cheek. I was crying.
"Gaara!? Gaara, are you okay!?" I heard Naruto's voice reach me from his kitchen. "Oh my God, Gaara, what's wrong?" he came skidding into the room, a look of fear on his face. He ran to the bed, grabbing my shoulders. His touch sent a wave of comfort through me. Comfort, and something else. Something electrifying.
"N-Naruto..." I breathed, putting both of my hands on his checks, the tears picking up speed.
He tried to wipe them away, but they kept coming. "W-what is it? Are you hurt? Did you have a nightmare again?"
"N-not hurt…" I managed to get out.
He stopped trying to halt my tears and just sat down next to me, holding me in a tight embrace. "Did you have a dream?"
"About your dad?"
I shook my head.
He pulled back so he could look at me. "What, then? I don't like it when you're sad, Gaara. Please tell me."
I tried to look into his eyes, but I couldn't. I couldn't meet his gaze. Instead, I buried my face in his chest, gripping onto his shirt. He stroked my hair, but I knew he was burning with curiosity. I just didn't think I could tell him about it, he may take it the wrong way… No. I decided. I had to tell him, keeping this bottled up wasn't good for me.
"Mm… N-Naruto…" I shakily sat up, covering my face with my arm.
"Yes?" he said, placing his hands on my shoulders. "What is it?"
"I dreamt…" I had to swallow and restart after a few seconds.
"We were in a room, separated by glass and there was a lion in the corner of your room, I was pounding on the glass and screaming at you to run, but you wouldn't…. You, the lion… I…" I couldn't speak anymore. My vision blurred with tears again, and my voice choked off.
"Oh, Gaara…" Naruto said, pulling me into another hug. "Shh… it's okay… everything's okay…."
"I… I couldn't save you!" I cried, embarrassed at my dependence on Naruto. "I… I thought you were dead…"
He pressed his cheek on top of my head, still shushing me and slowly rocking back and forth. "I'm here now, aren't I? Sh… I'm fine, you're fine, everything's fine… Shh…"
Suddenly, I needed him. Not like I simply thought he would make me feel better, it was like he was air. He was everywhere, everything. I needed to know that he needed me too. I had to… I needed it…
I reached up, and kissed him.
My world was perfect. I clung to him, afraid that he was going to pull away and reject me.
But he didn't.
He seemed shocked, then kissed me back. His lips were warm and soft, then harder, more aggressive. He turned me over and leaned over me, moving his lips to my neck. I gasped a little as his teeth grazed my skin. Quickly, he slid his warm hands under my shirt, sitting up and starting to pull it off. He then pulled his own shirt off, showing his muscular chest covered in scars. I also noticed that his seal was starting to show faintly. I placed my hand on the seal, tracing the small designs with my finger. He shuddered a bit and leaned back to kiss me again. His tongue slid past my lips and I let out a muffled moan.
He moved down, shaking off his pants and then moving to mine. I felt oddly embarrassed to find that I had an erection. He slowly slid his palm down and began to slide his hand up and down.
I moaned again, and he bent his head down to my ear. "Do you want to go all the way?" he asked, nibbling my ear a little.
He sat up, and slid one of his fingers in. I was glad; I wouldn't have been able to take him quite yet.
I let another moan of pleasure slip out of my lips. He slid in another finger.
"Are you ready?" he asked quietly.
"Y-yes…" I sighed.
He pulled his fingers out, and began to enter into me.
I gasped as he went deeper. He began to thrust.
Happiness coursed through me, and I came.
Naruto flopped down next to me, and kissed my forehead.
"Happy birthday." He said quietly.
It was hard to believe that all of that had happened in one day.
"Naruto? What's wrong?"
It was three days after my birthday and I had moved in with Naruto. Right now, he was on the phone.
He held a finger up to me, then said, "Yes, Tsunade-sama. I understand. Thank you."
He hung up the phone, then turned to me. "That was Tsunade." He said, leaning against the wall. "She has a mission for us. There has been a couple of killings in the Village Hidden in the Mist. We have to go check it out."
"We should set out as soon as possible." He said, looking at the clock on the wall. "It's almost noon."
Twenty minutes later, we were jumping through the trees, on our way. We had no one else with us, Tsunade wanted to keep as many ninja in the village as she could. The silence between us was heavy; this was a very dangerous mission. We didn't talk until we had almost reached the village. I didn't realize we had been going so fast. Naruto stopped, and I landed on the branch next to him.
"We have to be careful." Naruto whispered, his voice so low I could scarcely hear him.
"Now, there should be a gang of about five ninja who are the killers. They are all jounin, so you should be careful, you're just a chunin."
I nodded again, and we set out into the village.
It was like they were waiting for us. There they stood, surrounding us in a circle. Ninja who have slaughtered for no reason, ninja who-
It happened so fast, I couldn't tell what was going on. There was a large boom, and I was blown about twenty feet away.
Taking advantage of us while we were down, two of the men came after me, and the other three went to Naruto.
"Gaara!" I heard him yell. I was up on my feet in an instant, my sand circling around my feet.
The men seemed a bit surprised as I sent daggers of sand towards them, but they shook it off as soon as it came. They were ready to deal with anything. I saw Naruto out of the corner of my eye, fighting against the two men in front of him.
Wait, only two? There were five in total, I had counted earlier. One, two, three, four… I couldn't see the other one.
In my lapse of concentration, one of the men punched me in the gut, hard.
I immediately turned and kicked him in the face. A while ago, I had started learning Taijitsu with Lee, now I was glad that I had. They weren't expecting that type of power from me; I was pretty scrawny after all. But, then again, so was Lee.
They guy caught my foot, and swung me around a few times before throwing me against a tree. I turned just in time, using the momentum from the toss to spring me back at him. I used my sand as a boost, and tore right at him. I smashed into him, tackling him to the ground and snapping his neck easily.
I was about to get up again to fight the other when I saw that Naruto wasn't having such an easy go.
The other two that were there seemed like they were more coordinated than my attackers were.
They would trade off, one attacking Naruto as a distraction, and the other getting a few good hits in. I could see that Naruto was quickly starting to tire out.
But I couldn't be paying attention to him now, as much as I wanted to. The other guy I was fighting was coming up to me, and coming up fast. He didn't seem like he was very good with anything other than Taijitsu, like Lee. But he was also a brute force kind of person from what I could see. He tackled me, rolled me off of his dead comrade, and started to try and punch me. My sand made me almost invincible, of course, but he was fast. Very fast. He kept going, too. One blow after another, so fast that his hands blurred.
I tried to get up, and succeeded. I covered him in sand, and quickly killed him, then turned to Naruto.
Naruto, Naruto… I couldn't find him.
He was buried underneath the two other men that were fighting him, yelling in pain.
"NARUTO!" I screamed and ran over, my gourd falling from my back. I slammed both men's heads into the ground, effectively killing both of them. "Naruto, Naruto, are you okay? Naruto!"
He looked up at me, his eyes glazed a bit. "G-gaara…"
I cradled his head to my chest, stroking his blonde hair softly. "Sh… you'll be fine."
He shook his head and coughed up a bit of blood. "It… it's the end for me, Gaara. I… I hope that you learn to live on your own, and d-drive-" he coughed again.
By now, I was crying. "Naruto… No, NO! Keep your eyes open, dammit! Don't go away from me! Don't leave me all alone!"
He shook his head again, tears starting to flow from his eyes, too. He began to lift up his shirt to reveal a huge hole in his stomach, something that couldn't be repaired. "Take… take care of the others for me, will you?"
He smiled and rested his hand on my cheek. I held it there.
"Gaara... I love you…" and I saw my one and only true love's eyes fade out, and his hand grew limp.
"Naruto?" I shook him, my hands covered in his blood. "Naruto! NARUTO! COME BACK TO ME, DAMMIT! NO!"
I heard a splashing noise behind me, and I turned.
It was the other guy who left, followed by two or three other men.
I stood, my gaze tinged in red, my blood on fire.
The splashing noise had come from someone pouring water on my sand, now it was useless to me.
I didn't care.
With a roar of pure hatred and agony, I shot off towards the closest guy, brutally ripping his throat out. I heard him scream and fall to the ground as I turned to the next guys.
They ran up to me, their hands radiating chakra. I gathered up all of the strength I could, and ran at them, grabbing their heads and crushing their skulls in between my hands. I let them fall limply to the ground as the last one stared at me in terror. He started to walk backwards, but he tripped over a root in his way. He fell back, and I loomed over him.
I said nothing, all I did was take my hand, and plunge it straight into his chest, tearing out his heart.
He screamed, then it was over.
I turned around, scouting the area for more men.
After I saw it was all clear, I headed back to Naruto, crumbling into a heap next to him.
"Naruto…" I whispered. "I… I don't want to live without you…"
I wasn't going to, I decided.
I searched through my pile of weapons, pulling out a small dagger that I had gotten from him a while back.
Smiling, I thought about all of the wonderful memories we had.
And I plunged the knife into my own heart, falling to the ground next to my beloved.
"I love you, Naruto…"
And it all went black.