Eeep! Sorry it took me so long to post people! Skool's been a bitch and the weekends are now the only time I get to sit down and write for once without a deadline up my ass, so don't hurt me! *cowers* But anywho, because of unknown forces of vile-ness, I can only now post about once a week, twice if I'm lucky. So here, before anymore of those stinking monkeys catches up with me, is the third chappy to Skool Daze.

Stuff that I don't own: the characters to this fic, except the principal and his stupid secretary. Jhonen Vasquez owns Zim and Nny and Dib and GIR and Squee and Shmee... must I go on?

Chapter Three

Skool Daze

On the way to skool the next day, Nny was unusually quiet. He stayed silent most of the way there, eyes straight ahead and brow furrowed, deep in thought. Squee was about to ask him what was wrong when he spoke.

"Squee-gee," he began slowly, choosing his words with the utmost care. "What would the skool do if, say, a teacher didn't show up for skool the morning after—" he stopped, cursing himself for his slip-up.

"The morning after what?" Squee squeaked.

'The morning after she got dissected,' Nny thought perversely, but instead said lamely, "Umm... she, disappeared?"

'Uh-oh,' Squee thought. 'Shmee, did Nny have anything to do with this?' he asked mentally, squeezing the teddy-bear in his lap tightly.

"Yes," the voice responded grumpily. "Now lemmie 'lone. I'm tired."

"Sorry," Squee whispered softly.

Nny heard him. "What was that?"

"Umm, nothing. I was going to say that the skool would supply a substitute until the, uh, teacher reappeared."

Nny relaxed slightly as Squee mentioned the skool supplication of a sub, but then tightened as he finished the sentence. "Forever?" he murmured, frightened at the idea of having to teach the (shudder) children for the rest of his life, even if it was different from his normal day job.

Thankfully, though, Squee shook his head. "No, not forever. Just until the skool can find a permanent replacement if the teacher doesn't reappear within two weeks." He looked at Nny, all trace of fear wiped away by curiosity. "Why?"

Nny shuddered, none too pleased at having to teach for even two weeks. 'At least its not for the rest of your life,' he thought grumpily. "No reason," he said in response to Squee's query. Squee was about to say more when they arrived at the little one's new skool. "We're here," Nny said hurriedly, and Squee quickly stuffed his bear back into his backpack before getting out of the car (which, incidentally was Ms. Bitters' dented vehicle, since Nny's was in the shop for repairs) and heading up the stairs of the building to wait for the bell.

"Fook," Nny muttered, as he searched for a parking space and checked the time. It was twenty minutes before the start of the skool day, and he had to get to the main office to figure out how to substitute before then. But first... 'Ha,' he thought, parking in an empty space directly in back of the building, near a set of doors. Climbing out of the dented wreck of Ms. Bitters' car, he scrambled up the path to the door, narrowly missing the tiny scurrying bodies of students all the way to the office.

He eventually made it, and stood, panting, on the other side of the door when a voice startled him. "Can I help you?"

The speaker was a young woman, bouncy, blonde, and buxom. Just the type he hated. With a snarl he almost launched himself at the woman before he remembered where he was and what he was there for. Instead he busied himself with his trenchcoat, shoving his hands in his pockets and walking up to her desk. "Yea," he responded to her question, "where is Ms. Bitters' classroom? I'm her new substitute."

The lady looked him up and down, taking in his black attire, spiked hair and combat boots before gazing into his eyes, surprise evident in hers. "I wasn't aware she needed a sub..." she began.

"That's because you're the damn secretary, woman!" A new voice assaulted the pair from inside a second doorway. "Good morning, sir, I'm the principal of this skool, James Walker." Nny noted with a slight quirk of his eyebrow the emphasis on "pal" and filed the man away along with his annoying secretary for future disposing of. "Pleased to meet you Mister..."

"Johnny. Johnny C. (a/n: First Mate Smee of the good ship Jolly Roger in Peter Pan had a cutlass named Johnny Corkscrew... coincidence? O.o....)" Nny said quietly. He ignored the proffered hand, choosing instead to turn and walk around the office, thinking of the various ways he could fillet these two.

Finally after what seemed an interminable silence, the principal spoke. "Just how long will you be staying?"

Nny turned around and spread his hands to indicate an unknown amount of time. "Just until you can find a replacement if Ms. Bitters doesn't return."

Mr. Walker glanced around the room and sat down in a chair, fiddling with a pen he had found. "So two weeks then?"

Nny nodded his head. "Yea."

The principal nodded his acquiescence and Nny left, heading down the hall toward what he hoped was Ms. Bitters' classroom.

~*~ : ~*~ : ~*~ : ~*~ : ~*~

Zim and Dib sat in their classroom, awaiting Ms. Bitters and another boring day of DOOM. Surprisingly, she didn't show up exactly on time as she had done the past mornings for the many years they had been there, and Dib began to become worried.

"Maybe she was abducted by aliens! Or what about the jolly green giant?" He dashed around the room, trying to get the others to believe his speculations. "YOU!" He shouted when he got around to Zim. "YOUR FILTHY ALIEN FRIENDS KILLED HER, DIDN'T THEY??"

Zim looked blandly at the stink-beast in front of him. "Sorry, this time you're wrong, filthy stink-beast. 'Twas not I who did away with the annoying Ms. Bitters, although I wish it were..." The Irken ducked behind his desk to formulate some plan for world domination, while the other students of the room chatted and threw paper airplanes and spit wads at Dib, save one.

Squee took in the proceedings as he squeezed himself deeper into the depths of his desk, clutching his backpack with the teddy-bear inside. 'They know,' he thought to Shmee, 'They know about Nny and Ms. Bitters. What am I going to do?'

The bear's voice sounded strangled. 'First, you're NOT going to squeeze me like that again, I can't breathe! And second, they don't know. They're just guessing correctly without knowing it. Now be quiet, Nny's almost here.'

Bear and boy shut up as a tall figure entered the room, wearing the familiar black on black with black trenchcoat and combat boots, and black spiked hair. He silently slipped across the room, sitting in Ms. Bitters' desk and waiting it seemed, for everyone to notice him. It took a while, and his amused expression was grew colder and colder until finally the last person stopped yammering and sat and stared at the man at the desk.

It was only then that he spoke. "Welcome class. I am your new substitute, Johnny C."

Ooo.. cliffy.. I know, I hate them too, but there will only be a few of them, so don't worry. So, like it, hate it? What? TELL MEEEEEE!!!! *runs away screaming and pulling her hair* Clicky-clicky pweaze with a cherry on top!