Don't own a thing.

Buffy let out a deep breath when Angel exited her home. Her mind was buzzing with one too many thoughts. It'd been harder with him there though, looking at her. His eyes were begging her to say something, but she couldn't. She could hardly even look at him after he spoke of turning Drusilla.

He had asked her if she loved him. That she hadn't been expecting. But she didn't need to think about it. Buffy knew she did, she'd known for a long time now.

She was a slayer in love with a very unique vampire.

And now, less than ever, she didn't know what to do about that.


Buffy excused herself to her room when her mother got home.

Up there, she was alone with her thoughts. Far too many of them, at that.

It was so hard to believe Angel and Angelus were the same person. But it was true, she knew that. She tried not to think about his soulless days but she knew there had been plenty and he had done some major damage in his time.

Not too long ago she and Willow had taken some of Giles' books about him. It was to learn more about his human days but Buffy couldn't pass up the chance to look into his earlier days as a vampire. And what she had seen... what she had read...

But even with such, every time she heard him speak of those days... it just became so much more surreal somehow.


Buffy could hardly concentrate on one thing the rest of the night. Her head was just all over the place.

She did force herself to take her mind off of him, off of them, for a little while though. Instead, letting her mind wander to Ford and how she was going to handle that.

But the little release on that was short-lived. Before she knew it, everything was back to Angel.

Giving up, she finally went to sleep. Her last thoughts were of his former self, her head trying to imagine the horrible things they'd discussed.