Minimum Size

Fandom: TWEWY (mention of BB and FF)

Pairing(s): Neku + Joshua (friendship)

Rating: PG-15 / T (for mention of some rather unpleasant/adult subjects)

Note: Based on a doujinshi of the same name.

Summary: After much debate amongst each other, the Higher-ups finally decided upon a suitable punishment for Joshua for his Game with Kitaniji Megumi… and it left Joshua incredibly frustrated.


Prelude: Minimum Size

If there's one thing I've always been rather proud of (though maybe would likely argue I'm proud of everything I do/am), it's the fact that I've never actively cursed in my whole life, and my afterlife, too. I've just never seen much reason in my life to curse, and I was convinced for a long time that it would stay like that until the end of my days…

You know what's funny? Life likes to throw you these annoying curveballs that, pardon the phrasing, like to fuck up your life very much…

"Oh you have got to be…! God… fuckin' dammit! When I get my hands on those goddamn… bastards I'll just-hrrrrgh!"

Yep… so much for my "no swearing" record…

Of course, I knew it was coming; it was just a matter of time before the brass up above to think up a suitable punishment for my Game with Megumi, since I had almost destroyed Shibuya without ever thinking twice about it. They couldn't just Erase me, though, because I had no more Conductor who could take over once I was gone, and that was my only solace in knowing that I was still allowed to exist. For a little while, at least, because really, who knows with those guys up above?

This… this however… I was so not going to let them get away with this!

"Oy, Boss! What just hap-!"

Mr. H's expression is pretty much what I had expected of it since I had looked into the mirror that morning; very very surprised.

It isn't everyday someone gets turned into a 6-year-old toddler, after all…


The one thing I had always hated of my life, more so than my "unnatural" coloring, was my own childhood. I suppose there's quite a lot of people who can say that they had an unhappy childhood, and everyone has their own reasons as to why, but for me, it was a little worse than the norm.

I was born as the youngest son (by about a minute) of Kiryu Tenrimaru and Elizabeth Gardner. They never did marry, but they did stay with each other until the end. Mother doted on me, and Father on my twin brother, and while this was usually not much of a problem, there were times that we wanted the other parent's attention. In that case, we "switched" with each other, and despite them being our parents, they never realized what we had done.

When we turned five, our family got involved in a car accident, with myself and my brother being the only survivors. As we had no more family, we were soon sent to an orphanage either until someone adopted us or until we were proper adults.

Out of the two of us, it was my brother who was the strongest, both mentally and physically. The longer we stayed in that place, the more I felt our once strong connection breaking apart, as brother began to hang out with other friends and left me to fend for myself, mostly. Because of this, I was always an easy target for bullies, and without my brother to help me, I eventually retreated into my own shell.

I told myself it was fine, and I always tried so hard to ignore the bruises along my arms…

No one was going to help me, anyway… and my only wish became to grow up as soon as I possibly could. That was why… I hated being so little…


"Okay, sooo… what do you plan to do, Josh?"

I sigh slightly in annoyance. "Not much I can do, Mr. H," I say simply, though I am trying very hard to not start cursing all over again (thus far I'm succeeding at it). "I can't command Noise like this, nor can I oversee the Game like this. So I'm afraid I don't have any other choice but to wait out and see how long this lasts."

As fun as it might be to take a break, though, I know I can't stay here at WildKat forever. I have no idea how long this stupid punishment is going to last, but I don't want to spend it all cooped up inside. The main problem is that I'm forcibly tuned up to the RG and in this current body it's not recommended to go out alone. This leave me at an impasse; what am I supposed to do for who knows how long?

"Well, I could keep an eye on things for you if you want, but what will you do? Gonna stay inside all day?"

"Of course not!" In this weather? It's mid-summer! I'm not staying inside with this weather! Especially not when I'm forced into the RG like this! "I just need to figure out how to get out to do stuff…"

Mr. H hums in thought with one hand rubbing at the stubble on his chin. "Well… there is one easy way…"

…I'm not sure I like the sound of that…


'This is not going to end well this is not going to end well this is not going to end well…'

That's really all that's going through my head as I adjust my "new clothes", which consists of a pair of blue shorts with black suspenders, a lighter blue shirt and some simple shoes with velcro straps instead of shoelaces. I don't like this look at all, but I don't have a lot of choice…

I know who Mr. H called a few minutes ago without even needing to Scan him (not that I could, mind you), and the thought of him seeing me like this is, oddly, embarrassing. I really hope that he'll believe Mr. H's story, because I really don't want to imagine what might happen otherwise…

The bell over the door rings and I try to not let my anxiety show (which is very hard to do, oddly, when you're stuck in such a young body) as he walks in. I instinctively cling to Mr. H's pants leg as I try to stay as indifferent as I can.

Why oh why is it so hard though!?

"You wanted to see me, Mr. H?" Neku calls out, once he's closed the door behind him, before he seems to notice me and you blinks in surprise. "Hm?"

"Oh hey, Phones, thanks for coming," Mr. H quips, and he seems to ignore how Neku was looking at me just then. His words draw Neku's attention to him (for now), however, which is a slight relief. "I was wondering if you could look after this kid for a while for me."

Of course he's surprised (and confused, I'll bet), before he looks back to me and I resist the sudden urge to duck behind Mr. H, though my fingers do clutch to the material of his pants tighter when he does.

"Since I'm busy, I'd like you to look after him until Josh comes back."

'Would you please stop looking at me so much? This is bad enough on me as it is already, Neku!'

He crouches down to look at me better and this time I do duck back just a little as he regards me.

"…This kid looks exactly like that guy."

"AH! Well, this is his little brother! His little brother!"

Oh yeah, really believable when you put it so nervously, Mr. H… I can already tell he doesn't believe a word of it; I can see it on his face, and yet he doesn't say anything about it. I'll bet he will the moment we're outside, though… just wait…

"In any case, I'm counting on you."

'Please don't ask questions please don't ask…'

"…Yeah, sure."

'Phew!' I'm barely able to keep my sigh of relief to myself, but really, what would I be sighing for?! This can't possibly end well… there's no way this is going to end well!

I'm screwed…


This was an idea that refused to bugger off after I read a doujinshi with the same name. Main reason being that kid Joshua was just too cute for his own good (plus his expressions were just PRICELESS! XD).