A/N - This has been in my head for too long and I can't help but post it. I wanted to save it till later, but I'm too impatient. I know exactly what is going to happen with this story from start to finish, so prepare yourselves for a crazy ride. I really love this fic, so I'm extra nervous that people like it.
Once you read this prologue, please remember that nothing is as it seems. The sotry will mostly be from Damon's POV, with a little Elena. Though, the prologue part one is from Elena's POV.
Massive love and thanks to the lovely Sheynondoah, giving me the courage to post this. It's so out of my comfort zone.
Also, I got the idea for this fic from the song 'Bang Bang', which I recommend you listen to while reading this chapter.
Please review, should I continue? I'm so nervous about this, haha.
Disclaimer - I do not own Vampire Diaries or the song 'Bang Bang'. Just the plot line!
Prologue Part One- BANG!
Got him with a bang,
Love him down, down
I shot my baby with a bang, bang,
Got him with a bang,
Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang.
Guilt. Something I shouldn't feel, but something so potent that it's making me question everything that I stand for. I kill; it's what I do, what I've always done. I'm known as 'The Black Widow', known for seducing men and then killing them. I enjoy it, I'm good at it. So why am I now feeling like this? It's not supposed to happen.
Why is it that when I think about killing him all I feel is a horrible ache in my heart? My brain keeps telling me this is just business. Mason has given me a direct order and as always, I need to comply. He knows that Detective Damon Salvatore already understands what's going on more than he should. Mason also knows that Damon is on to him, he's the only person that can't be bought off or bribed by one of Mason's many loyal followers. Damon has something beautiful called integrity, which is something that I've never truly seen before. That's what makes him stand out, it's also what makes him so dangerous to Mason. Damon lives by the law and is hell bent on sending Mason to the slammer for distributing illegal alcohol. Prohibition seems to have made the taste of alcohol even sweeter for us Americans and Mason is making millions from it. I don't care for such matters. In all honesty I don't care about anything… except him.
It wasn't supposed to play out like this. We knew that Damon would be a tougher nut to crack than any of the other slime balls I go after. Usually, all I need to do is make them think I'm easy. A dance, a drink and some batting of my eyelashes frequently does the trick. They're such pushovers. Then, I take them somewhere quiet, maybe let them have a little bit of fun if they're a looker, then I shoot them, square in the head. It's messy, but I like it that way. I love when the adrenaline from killing them pours through my body, making me feel powerful. To me, there is never a time that a man will be more vulnerable than when they are in the hands of a pretty woman. They always act so tough, but they're not; I know exactly how they are wired.
The papers say I'm mentally unstable and truthfully, maybe I am. But I make my living doing this. I'm looking out for me. It's been five years since my first killing, but I can still remember it like it was yesterday. I watched as the light left the man's eyes in front of me. I wasn't sure what to expect when I did it, but what I felt did surprise me; nothing. I felt absolutely nothing. The numbness felt amazing, taking me away from my past troubles. Maybe it was because the man deserved it, maybe it was because I'm just some sick freak who likes killing. But, I've never felt anything for any of my victims. Except Damon Salvatore, of course. He just seems to be caught up in this mess and there is only one way that I can get him out of it.
Mason told me to get to know him. He said he was guarded and hadn't been seen with a woman in years. Apparently some girl roughed him up before. I said it wouldn't be a problem… and it wasn't. But, not for the reasons I thought it would be. It wasn't a problem, because ironically I fell in love with him. Love, the word makes me want to laugh. It's something I never really understood until I met him. I always thought it was for a bunch of saps who just enjoyed necking. But, I found out the hard way that it does exist, and even more ironically that it's an emotion I can actually feel. It broke through the numbness and hit me like a ton of bricks. Falling in love with Damon Salvatore has never been part of the plan. There was supposed to be no feelings involved. But, things never work out the way you want them too, and now I had to kill him wither I wanted to or not.
My heart starts hammering as I look round and watch Damon's sleeping form. He's the first person I've ever slept with without killing them after. That's gotta count for something, right? I watch the rise and fall of his chest and can't imagine it lying still. I can't imagine his heart not beating. But, I have to. Mason knows that something is off. He thinks I'm close to blowing our cover … and I am. With every day that passes with Damon I want to tell him more and more about who I really am. But, Mason seems to find out everything in this city. I haven't told him that Damon and I have slept together many times before tonight. He would then start questioning why I didn't kill him and when Mason's asks questions it gets harder and harder to lie. Believe me, I've been there. Chicago wasn't a place for the faint hearted, that's something that I came to realise the hard way and I will never make that mistake again.
The moon shines through the curtain and lands on Damon's gorgeous body. I let my eyes gaze over every single inch of him, trying my hardest to keep the mental image locked away in my brain forever. His dark, messy hair is rested on my pillow. I hope that his smell remains there, the image of me crying against it fluttering through my mind. He looks too peaceful and I can't help consider taking the cowards way out and doing it while he sleeps. I can't do that though. He deserves more. He deserves answers.
I've tried so hard to think of another way around this. Wondering if we could run away together. Thinking about what would happen if I tried to kill Mason. But, no matter what I choose I lose him. I can't see a happy ending for us. So, I need to get him out of this horrible world now. I try to tell myself I'm saving him, but it will take a lot more than that to convince me it's true.
I lift my hand and softly trace a pattern over his chest, the warmth radiating from him melting my cold, evil heart. Yes, Damon Salvatore was most definitely my soul mate. I knew it since the first time I laid eyes on him, and I'm pretty sure he feels the same way. The connection that we have is beautiful and I can't help but wonder what would have happened if we had met each other under different circumstances. Would he have taken me to be his wife? Would we have two lovely children with his bright, blue eyes? This only makes my heart ache even more as I try to hold in a sob.
Damon's eyes start to flutter open as he smiles lazily towards me. It kills me knowing that the smile would be disappearing as soon as I show him my true self.
"What's wrong, 'Lena? You look all balled up," Damon comments as his hand reaches up and pushes the strand of hair off my face. He was only making this harder. He didn't know it, but he was. The nicer he was to me the guiltier I felt. The more he cared, the more I loved him. It wasn't fair.
"I'm fine. I just wanted to see your eyes," I reply, as I try my hardest to at least enjoy my last moments with Damon alive. My hands are shaking and I'm finding it hard to stay focused. He looks so at ease, so vulnerable that this is looking to be impossible. How can I hurt this man?
I'd been in this situation before, many times. Ready to finish the job when I've chickened out. Just wanting more time with him. Wanting this to all be a dream and believing that Damon and I could run off into the sunset unscathed. Of course, that was only a fairytale for a fool. Mason won't let that happen. It was simple; either I kill Damon or he kills us both. He's made that pretty clear and I need to protect Damon from that. Mason wouldn't know compassion or mercy even if it hit him in the face.
"C',mere, baby," Damon says softly as he picks me up and places me on top of him. The electricity from his touch flowing through my body, begging for more.
He begins kissing my neck softly, nipping away until he makes his way to my lips. I'm entranced, wanting to feel as much of this man as I can. His touch sets my body and soul alight and I would be lying if I said it isn't addictive. It was now something I crave daily.
"I love you, 'Lena," Damon says, his bright blue eyes staring into my own.
"I love you, Damon," I reply as I kiss him with everything I have in me. The adrenaline is pounding through my body, but it isn't how it usually feels. It's because I have this man in my arms, letting him take all of me. I know I'm falling into dangerous territory, I'm letting him change my mind. But, I can't.
While kissing him I reach over and pull out my small pistol that is hidden under my pillow. It's cold, without feeling, dangerous. I try my hardest to keep Damon occupied, and with one last kiss I abruptly sit up. I stick the gun forward and hold it up to his face. The colour drains from his cheeks and I know that there is no going back now.
"Elena? Doll, what are you doing?" Damon asks the confusion clear in his voice. He doesn't make move as I watch him stare at the gun in my hand.
"Look, Damon. I don't want to do this. I do love you. I just have no other option. Okay? This is the best thing I can do for you," I say, not too sure of my own words. With every second passing, the whole in my heart is getting bigger and bigger. My life without him flashing before my eyes as I look at the gun between us.
"Elena… what are you saying?" Damon asks, though I know he already knows the answer.
"I'm her, Damon. I'm the one you've been looking for." I look down, trying my hardest not to look into his eyes. I can't handle the look of betrayal that will mirror from them.
"You're The Black Widow," Damon says, staring at me as if I was a stranger. I know this is it. This is what it had all been leading up to. This will be the ruin of me. But, it is my only option.
After all, I'm Elena Gilbert. I don't have feelings. People stole them away from me a long time ago and I've never looked back since. Men are weak, they ruin women… and this is my revenge.
"Yeah, I am… and you're dead."
Don't kill me. As I said - NOTHING is as it seems. Please review and let me know if this is worth continuing. :)