Author's Notes:

This little story was done for one Ms. Smitty's birthday. I had a fairly hard
time writing Dinah as I'm not extraordinarily familiar with her character
outside of the BoP comics. Still, I think this turned out rather well, and feel
pretty proud of it. It's Potatoverse, so if you want to know WHY Dinah and Bats
are shacked up, wander over to and find


by A.j.


"Down here in the atmosphere, garbage and city lights.
I'm gonna save your tired soul, you're gonna save our lives."


Waking up in this bed is weird. It's not my bed. That shouldn't bother me
though. I've spent more time in strange rooms in the last few years than I'd
care to admit. This one's nice, as beds go. Really nice. And I've honestly
been spending more time in this bed than I have in my own for the last two

That seems really strange.

I'm here more than I am at my apartment. I know all of this bed's little
quirks. I know that if I open my eyes and look at the ceiling, there's a
good eight feet between me and it. I also know that there's a phone on the
night stand along with a self-cooling canter of water and two small crystal
glasses. And the most large, glaring thing I know is that if I roll over and
cuddle into the warmth at my back, I'll be getting quite a bit of exercise.

The sweaty fun kind. Lots of cardio fun. Emphasis on fun.

BatmanandorBruce is bendy. Really bendy. Did you know that he can touch his
nose with his toes? Like from backwards? Finding that out was rather
unexpected. Then again, so is this bed.

It's fluffy. With feather pillows. And a big maroon bedspread.

S'right. BatmanandorBruce sleeps - when he sleeps at all - in a fluffy bed
with fluffy pillows and a comforter you can sink into if you don't thrash
around too much. Yes, I know this because of empirical research.

I'm gonna tell you a secret.

I'm sleeping with Batman. And Bruce Wayne. They're one big squished together
person, you know. Little ole me. We're having sex too. And I have no idea
just how that happened.

It was supposed to be a one-night stand. I was lonely and my best friend had
just gotten engaged. I was happy for her. Really! She and her guy really
deserved to get together. And it was Christmas.

Damn boy had to go and propose in front of everyone, didn't he? Stupid
romantic Dick.

Jerk made me cry. And then there was him. And he looked kinda sad too.
Sons aren't supposed to find someone before their fathers. There's supposed
to be someone. Someone you can hug and share your joy with.

But there wasn't. Not for him, and not for me. But we were resourceful,
weren't we?

Who knew there was bed in the BatCave? And I find it rather telling that our
first little bout of fun happened in the shadow of the Batmobile. There's
something rather perverse about that. Then again, there's something rather
perverse about having a two-years-and-running one night stand.

He's not awake right now. That in itself is something of a minor miracle.
When we first started doing this, on a regular basis, it was almost
reassuring to know that no matter what, if I woke up, he'd be up too. The
first time I rolled over and he was snoring, I nearly died. Yup, you heard
it here. BatmanandorBruce snores. Not loudly, mind you. I don't think the
man is honestly capable of making noise without thinking about it these days.
Come to think of it, I'm pretty much the same way. Difference is, I like
noise. It reminds me something's outside my own head. Him? I think there
are days when he wants nothing else but to stay in that thick skull of his.

I've never had a male friend who's like that. The guys I normally go for are
pretty flamboyant. Admittedly, Bruce can be pretty colorful. But that's not
really him. Just like big scary Batman isn't him either. They're two people,
but not. It's never that simple for anyone. Bruce and Batman are like this
choco cookie that's all smashed together. You can still see the divides and the
differences, but there are bits and pieces of the cream and cookie all stuck
together. You can't separate them; they're just one big squishy mess.

And I know he'd toss me in a snow bank for even thinking of that analogy.
That's okay though. He'd get snow down his pants.

I love it when he's like that. When the two extremes of who he is sort of gang
up on the middle guy and just... are. It's so beautiful. And heartbreaking.
Because in those moments, I can see the man he was supposed to be.

I've made him grin. Did you know that? Mmmhmm. I was doing a really horrid
impression of Kyle and Donna's last dinner party, complete with commentary on
why Donna should SO not keep the litter box in the kitchen when it happened. It
started small. Just a twitch at the lips that let me know he was still
listening. Then it got a bit wider when I started in with the illustrative hand
motions and the squeaky voice Kyle makes when one of the cats get near him. And
just when I was about to finish up with the throw-pillow interpretive dance
representing Roy's reaction to the photo album it happened. He grinned. I was
so surprised I almost stopped talking. And let me tell you, those Wayne
Whitening Strips? I'm buying out the nearest Wal-K.

I've just realized something. Makes me think I'm rather stupid and that the
peroxide really has soaked into my brain. We're alike him and me. But flip-
flopped. Me-me, the me that's Dinah, was quiet. Real quiet. And the Her-me,
Black Canary, was real loud and out there and just... THERE. But I changed,
just like I think BatmanandorBruce has. And maybe that's okay, because I like
the person I am now.

Maybe he's starting to like himself just a bit more. Because I don't think he
really liked himself before. Not at all.

But he can smile now, around me. And Dick and Babs. And Cass. And
sometimes even Tim. Not all that often, because honestly, that'd kill a few of
our nearest and dearest through heart failure, but he can. And he does.

And somehow, we've kept this going.

He's still asleep. I like that. I like that he can do that here. More than
I'm really ready or willing to admit. It's nice to have that little thing to
lie about. I'm not sleeping with Bruce. I'm not sleeping with Batman. I am
sleeping with both of them. And... it's okay. Because he's not sleeping with
Dinah or Black Canary. And if the JLA would get that collective stick out of
their butts enough to ask, he'd have something to lie about too. He's sleeping
with both of us. Hee.

Maybe that's why I come back here. To this bed. Because in it, my dichotomy -
yes, I know what that means - seems rather simple. I am simply Dinah here, in a
way that I can so rarely be. God, he's known me for years. My weaknesses, and
strengths. And I know he respects me for it. Even after Ollie. He respects ME
because he lets me work here in Gotham.

Even I know that, lover or not, if I weren't the best that wouldn't be allowed.
Even if Babs is my partner. And that makes this thing so much better... and
worse. Better because as long as I toe that line, am that perfect, this will
keep going. I'd like to think that maybe, one day, I might have the leeway to
make a mistake. But at the same time, I hate him, just a little, for making me
think that thought.

I'm not perfect. Never was. Won't ever be. I've known this and been quite
comfortable with it for years. But he's making me think like that. Different.

And that scares the hell out of me, because he's changing me. Making me fit
into his world, bit by bit. And that goes way beyond one-night-stand.

We're starting to fit together. Him and me. Me and him. Dinah and Batman
andorBruce 2gether 4ever. Dangerous thoughts, those. Because he's Batman
too. And Bruce. All squished together.

And I'm becoming just me. Dinah and Black Canary. All squished together.

But we'll never work. It's common sense. He and I won't fit in the long run.
Because even with all my noise and his trying... I don't know how we can just
be us. I don't know if there's even an us. I don't know what this is at all.

But I don't want it to go away yet. Even as strange as it is waking up here,
it'd be weirder if I weren't. There's something going on here that I don't
quite understand. He doesn't either. I know, because if he did know, he
wouldn't keep coming back. If there's one thing Batman... Bruce... THEY can't
resist, it's a puzzle.

And I hate to say it, but this thing and me are the biggest puzzles going these
days. Even to myself.

Still. It's nice to pretend.