Disclaimer: All characters used in this story and elementary concepts are a property of the respective legal owners. This Fanfiction serves the entertainment and has been written without every financial interest and has been published. Responsibility and copyright for the contents of the history remain with the respective author. An injury of copyrights is not intended.
The Serie belongs to Joss Whedon
Buffy watched Xander out of the corners of her eyes. Something had changed between them after they arrived at the castle. First they said they were going to England, but that suddenly washed out. Now they were in Scotland, the hometown of the terrifying ghosts. Being in his presence felt different than it had in Sunnydale. During her daily workout with Rona and Violet she felt someone watching her and looked up. Xander was watching her and they started to timidly smile at the other. Sparks were flying and Buffy had thousands of butterflies in her stomach.
Damnit, Buffy! This is your best friend and he's something like a sister to you! Except he's not wearing a bra, she told herself and desperately tried to concentrate on her rating with Rona and Violet. But with one punch in her ribs she found herself on the floor with Rona grinning triumphantly down at her friend.
The blonde woman was completely perplexed and stayed where she was- down on the mat. She couldn't allow herself to look weak before the girls, just because she was somewhere else on in her mind. Just because she thought of him.
"Uhm, Buffy? Everything alright down there?" Violet leaned down and raised an eyebrow. Something was definitely wrong with the huntswoman. Buffy closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
It can't be true! I hate to be embarrassed, just because of this one mistake the girls are making fun of me, Buffy addressed herself.
Suddenly Rona was in the conversation too. "Buffy…"
Buffy interrupted her friend with a sharp, "What?" She was pissed at herself. What had she taught the huntswomen? That they shouldn't get sidetracked by something, ever! And what was she doing here? She was always looking at Xander, hoping that he would notice her. The blonde opened her eyes and looked up at her friends. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been so sharp…" She stood up on unsteady legs. "I was being mad at myself because I'm just so… unfocused." She quietly admitted and sighed reluctantly.
Since they all left Sunnydale, Rona and Violet were always hanging around Buffy. Either if they were on patrol or if they were training. And sometimes they even hung out in clubs. All together they had developed a strong friendship with each other.
Rona and Violet grinned like fools and that was the reason for Buffy to get out of there.
Alexander had his hands on his hips and was watching his best friend quickly walking away, amused. He had seen the whole situation and knew that it was embarrassing for Buffy. Very much so. That's why he decided to go after her. "Buffy, where are you going?" He asked loudly and rounded the next corner. What he saw there broke his heart. Buffy sat in a small armchair, legs securely tightened against her body, her head on her knees. Her hands shielded her face from being seen and she was crying bitterly.
"Buffy." He said again and hesitantly walked towards her. He didn't want to frighten her and he knew that she wasn't crying because of what happened in the camp. There must have been another reason.
Xander sat down on the arm of the chair and said, this time louder and clearly, "Buffy, what's wrong?" He waited for a moment, in which he didn't get an answer and took her hands in his. He smiled lovingly at her, the smile that often helped him in different situations. But not in this one, apparently. She just looked at him, eyes clouded with tears and in the next moment, new ones were flowing over her cheeks. "Hey, please don't cry, Buffy." His eyes had a calmness in them that normally would have calmed her but still Buffy didn't stop crying. She opened her mouth and tried to say something, but stopped. After taking a deep breath she tried again. "I… I think I made a terrible mistake years ago." She tried to loose his grip on her hand, but Xander didn't let go of her. The blonde woman admitted defeat. Normally, if she wanted to, she could have shoved him away with just her pinky. But today, she didn't want to, because his eyes just looked so calming and her heart ached for him and his comfort. "What mistake?" "Since when are you so strong?" She asked, her chin gently nodding towards his hand. "Don't change the subject here, Buffy! What mistake do you mean?" He wanted to know. "I think something has changed, since Sunnydale…" Xander nodded gently. "I've noticed it too. But please, stop beating around the bush. And tell me what's wrong, because I want to help. I can't stand seeing one of my girls so sad." Buffy sniffled and said, "I think that this boy who adored this girl, isn't thinking like that anymore. Because so many things have changed. They grew older and gained experience…" After she said that, she avoided his gaze and turned hers towards the wall.
Xander raised one eyebrow and it took him a moment to decipher the meaning of what she just said. And then it made sense. "Buffy, does that mean you love me?" "Xan, I've always loved you. For a time like best friends." She met his gaze for a brief time of two seconds before looking away again. "But over a certain amount of time, I… I now see you in another way." She stopped, but continued seconds later. "I think my feelings for you changed a few weeks ago. But if you want to break my heart…" Again the pause. She swallowed and continued, "Like I broke yours, I can understand that. Just please, do it quickly."
They still held hands, something that suddenly was so intimate.
"Please, look at me, Buffy." She didn't and just began crying again. He let go of her hand and panic spread through her. Was he leaving? In the next moment she felt her chin being lifted by a hand and she could have sworn that his breath hitched at the fear in her eyes.
"Buffy, I hope this is enough of an answer; I never stopped loving you. I just… suppressed it for some time."
Her eyes watered again, but this time it wasn't the hurt and the fear. This time she was happy that she finally knew what he felt. Xander hesitantly leaned forward and kissed her gently. A kiss that Buffy all too pleasantly returned. For a few seconds it was weird kissing the other but the feeling floated away soon. Both enjoyed the feeling of being near the other and to explore the other with their lips, their tongues, hearts, minds- simply with everything. Meanwhile, Rona, Violet and Amanda stood a few feet away and watched the the scene unfold, their mouths hanging wide open. Willow and Kennedy came around the corner and stood beside the three.
"What's going on?" The witch asked.
Kennedy had already seen how Xander and Buffy had kissed and lifted a hand to show Willow.
The End - Do you Like it or Hate?