Touched up 03/02/2015

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

A/N: So, no shit, there I was … anyhow, this started out as my homework for Smut University 2013 – Kink and Fetish. I did a little reading. My vanilla and white bread self was a tad uncomfortable.

So, anyways … the little scene got longer and longer because I was enjoying the idea of Bella teasing Jasper. It ended up way too long for the homework assignment. I submitted the last scene for the homework and decided to post the whole story.

This has not gone through the beta wringer.

Creative consultant Bonzie


2014 Twisted Pretzel Awards: 2nd Place Best One Shot.

2014 Twisted Pretzel Awards: 3rd Place Funniest Author (for Peaches.)

2014 Fanfic-n-tastic Awards: 1st Place Favorite One Shot.

2014 Non-Canon Awards: 1st Place Best One Shot.


-oOoOo- Monday -oOoOo-


Well, my first day of school hadn't gone too badly so far, despite the damp, chilly, drippy, gloomy day, but it was only lunch time. My mission for the day was to just survive the new-kid-first-day ogling.

It sure looked like I'd already picked up a friend. Jenna … Jennifer … Jessica!

She'd latched onto me in the last class before lunch, and her mouth had run a mile a minute, but that had been okay. Mostly. Her chatter had kept me from having to actually speak.

She was a perky thing. Just a little ray of sunshine in cloudy, damp Forks. Her light brown curls bounced around her shoulders as she rambled on, chatting about this class and that student, and how this teacher and that teacher were about assignments and homework. I didn't think I'd have too much trouble with the classes though. Most of the stuff I'd done already back in Phoenix.

I'd have to say the best part about Jessica attaching herself to me was at least when she looked at me she wasn't fucking me with her eyes; unlike that Mike Newton boy. Noodles was in my first class and was up my ass the second I walked into the room. Granted, I wasn't half-bad looking, and I had great hair—even if I did say so myself—but you would have thought the disinterested stare and the multiple layers of clothes I was wearing would have put him off.


Seemed he liked girls who wore two T-shirts under their two-sizes-too-big Green Bay Packers sweat shirts and were rocking the bag lady look.

I thought I nailed it with the royal purple backpack, the navy pea coat, and burgundy desert boots with the broken down heels.

Unfortunately, the jersey had given him an opening.

"So, you're a Packer Backer?" he had asked brightly as he escorted me to my chair.

I had just blinked at him and said, "No. I bought it because it was green."

He had appeared confused for a moment, shook it off, and the big grin was plastered back on his face.

I might need to adjust my mission.




I sighed as Jessica dragged me over to what I assumed was her usual lunch table that was nearly full already. I groaned as I recognized the spiky blond hair on the one guy.



I slumped in the chair at the end of the long, rectangular table as my new buddy Jessica bounced to the seat across from me.

"Bella, this is Angela, Ben, Tyler, Lauren, Eric, and Mike." Jessica waved her hand at each of them. "Everybody, this is Bella. We have trig together."

I gave them a little wave, dropped my lunch bag on the table, and tried to ignore Mike, and that Tyler dude who was leering at me.

You'd think he'd never seen a girl with a Ren and Stimpy lunch bag before.

The dark-haired boy named Ben leaned toward me and asked, "So, how's your first day been so far?"

"Moist," I answered as I pulled my ham and swiss sandwich and green grapes out of the bag.

"Would you like a drink, Bella? I could get you one."

Mike was up on his feet already, and his blue eyes looked so eager, I said, "Sure, if they have lemonade. Let me get you some money." He was gone before I could even reach into my pocket.

I shrugged my shoulders as Jessica and the quiet girl Angela rolled their eyes.

Jessica giggled. "You're the shiny, new toy."

I just nodded resignedly as I took a bite out of my sandwich and looked around the crowded cafeteria. They would all get used to me soon. In a little town like Forks, I was big, big excitement.

It was kinda sad, really.

I was pleased to note I wasn't the only one who looked kinda damp.

The doors opening again at the far end of the cafeteria caught my attention and this humongous dude with short dark hair and adorable dimples strutted in. Right beside him was a tall blonde chick who looked like a model for the classic pin-up girl pictures the sailors taped up next to their racks.

"Who are they?" I asked.

Jessica took a quick peek over her shoulder and turned back to me with a devilish grin on her face.

"They're the Cullens," Angela said timidly from my left.

"They're Doctor Cullen's adopted kids," Jessica added, raising her eyebrows up to her hairline. "He's a surgeon at the hospital." She leaned over the table and whispered, "They moved here about two years ago from Alaska. He and his wife can't have kids or something so they adopted five. Can you imagine?" She brought her hand up next to her mouth as if there was any chance the adopted people could hear us as they walked by. "The big guy is Emmett Cullen and the girl next to him is Rosalie Hale. See how she looked all around the room? Just checking to see if everyone was looking at her."

"Well, she is beautiful," Angela said softly. She pushed her glasses up her nose and brushed her long, deep brown hair over her shoulder. "Actually, they're all very good looking."

"Good looking? They're gorgeous!" Jessica hissed as she looked quickly over her shoulder again. "The short girl with the spiky, black hair is Alice Cullen, and the blond guy right behind her is Jasper Hale. He always has that grumpy look on his face. He's Rosalie's twin. Oh!" Jessica squealed and slapped her hand over her mouth. "There's Edward Cullen," she gushed.

My first thought was that they were all really pale. Really, really pale. Even more so than I was.

Then my eyes were crazy glued on the disgruntled blond god that was practically floating across the room.

"Fuckin'-A. I'd tap that in a heartbeat," I muttered.

"Bella!" Jessica's baby blues were about to pop out of her cute face.

Apparently, she'd heard that. "What? Look at him."


"Edward? Pfffffft. The blond."

He was … he was fucking hot. I could just eat him up and leave nothing but fingernails behind—if I didn't choke to death first on my own drool. He was even sexier than my last fuck buddy boyfriend back in Phoenix. That guy had been pretty hot, and he didn't come close.

Jasper. Kind of old fashioned, but it had a sexy sound.

He had on a charcoal grey V-neck sweater over a navy blue collared shirt, blue jeans that were just tight enough to show the flexing of his thigh muscles as he walked, and hiking boots. My whole body quivered. I realized my mouth was hanging open and snapped it shut.

I never even heard the rest of what Jessica was blathering on about, though I wondered briefly if she had mentioned anything about why Mr. Crankypants was cranky.

*Whew* I could crank that shaft.

I would ask Jessica later. She'd be only too happy to tell me.

I watched the five beautiful pale people move gracefully across the room and when that blond beauty's back was to me I nearly dropped my teeth.

Would you get a load of Grumpy Guy's ass? And those shoulders?

It was a good thing he sat down because I damn near fell out of my chair. I shook my head to clear the stupor and tried to refocus on my food.

It was inevitable that they would look over toward our table. I was the new girl, and it wasn't like I hadn't heard people talking about me and whispering all day. Then there was Jessica who was practically hyperventilating over the scrawny, pretty boy she called Edward.

Not that there was anything wrong with being a pretty boy, it's just that I preferred my men to look like … well, men.

Then, you know, Noodles was sort of hovering, and Laurie … Laurel … Lauren was getting louder and louder trying to keep Tyler's focus on her.

What was the fascination? I was just fresh meat, I guessed.

I forced my attention back to Jessica, finished my sandwich, drank a bit of the lemonade Noodles had bought for me, and stared down at the grapes that remained. I thought I should finish them off. Waste not, want not and shit.

After picking up and licking the third one before putting it into my mouth, I had the strangest sensation that someone was watching me; though that, in and of itself was odd because people had been staring at me all day. I rubbed at the weird, prickly tingle at the back of my neck and picked up another grape. I tapped it on my lips as I tried to nonchalantly scope out the cafeteria.

I had expected people to try and get a look at me. My dad was the police chief and, apparently, he'd been crowing it from the roof tops that his little Isabella was coming to live with him. Couldn't fault him for his enthusiasm. He'd even bought me an old truck. "Vintage" or "classic" some would have called it. "Decrepit old piece-of-shit tank" is what I called it. Ugly as it was, I loved that damn old, rusty, bucket of bolts.

My main problem with Charlie was he had insisted on telling everyone my name was Isabella. I pushed the grape through my lips and crushed it with annoyance. I'd been correcting people all day about it because I preferred to be called Bella. Sighing, I figured they'd all get it eventually.

Otherwise, I'd hardly even seen Charlie. It was almost like living alone. Which was cool.

I picked up another grape, licked a drop of juice from the end, and as I was about to put it in my mouth my eyes had worked their way around the room and landed on the pretty people again.

I noticed that there were empty tables next to them. The room had seemed fairly packed to me, so why wasn't anyone sitting next to them?

When Jessica paused for a breath, I dove in with my question. "Jessica? How come nobody is sitting next to the Cullens? Do they stink?"

Through all the jabber and noise in the cafeteria, I thought I heard a snort and a throaty chuckle from across the room.

Jessica's pretty blue eyes flew open wide. "Wha…? Oh, my God, no! They smell wonderful! I wish I knew what kind of cologne they wore—I'd buy it by the gallon," she said, her hands fluttering as she spoke.

She'd probably be swimming laps in it, too. She overdid it a little with the eau de toilette.

Angela cleared her throat next to me like she was embarrassed about even talking. "They … um, it sounds kinda weird, but they put off a vibe."

That nice boy Bill … Bob … Ben leaned in front of Angela and whispered, "Yeah, it's like they have a force field around them that keeps you from getting too close. Even the teachers don't bother them."

"They never get in trouble," Tyler muttered. "They turn in all their homework, too."

The boy with the long, straight, black hair grinned. "Yeah, they do smell really good, but then their shield repels you. It is creepy. I bet they're, like, way advanced, super-smart aliens, and they have some sort of tricorder thing that sends out a pulse to keep the humans away." His hands were darting back and forth. "You know, like, they came here from another solar system or galaxy, and they're studying the indigenous humanoids, but they have to abide by the Prime Directive. They can't interfere with the natural evolution or development of the native species so they play it real cool and aloof and don't fraternize."

They're all pale and pretty; they smell good; they have a vibe; never get in trouble; turn in all their homework. They probably pass all their tests, too.

They must be aliens.

Lauren, with the stick-straight platinum blond hair that she couldn't manage to keep from flipping at Ty-leer, sighed in exasperation and rolled her eyes. "Eric, their parents are absolutely loaded—they're not aliens. Do you have to make everything about Star Wars?"

Rich kids—aliens. Kinda the same thing.

Noodles frowned at her. "That was Star Trek, but yeah. Bella, they are kinda creepy. Especially the tall blond guy. He hardly ever talks and is always just off to the side or standing in corners … watching people." He shivered a little. "They don't belong to any clubs or play any sports. They don't even go to any of the dances. They seem kinda stuck-up. You should probably stay away from them."

I wouldn't mind ol' Jasper getting stuck up in my …

"Huh," I murmured noncommittally.

"They're so perfect, I bet their father does experimental plastic surgeries on them or something."

"If that's the result, he can do a little work on me."

I wouldn't mind a private consultation with that blond babe Jasper. He could do a little work on me.

I turned back to peruse the creepy, pale, technologically advanced aliens that were smart enough to cross galaxies but were too stupid to join the chess club or go to the homecoming dance so they would fit in properly with their research subjects. Being aliens would certainly account for them being stunningly beautiful and not having any acne, or wrinkles in their clothes.

Of course, being the surgically altered children of a rich doctor would account for all of that, too.

The girls were busily chatting with each other, but the big one was grinning, showing damn near all of his shiny white choppers, the golden-haired god was looking right at me, and the scrawny one with the rag mop 'do was glaring at me. What the hell was his problem? My built-in Asshole Proximity Sensor was going off.

Back to the god wearing the fuck-hot boots and low-rise blue jeans—had he been watching me eat the grapes?

My last boytoy had liked it when I would eat an ice cream cone, and living in Phoenix? My mother Renee had never questioned all the times I went out to the ice cream shop. I had never gotten past the first few licks but …

I glanced down at the little light green fruit and looked back at him from the corner of my eye. I licked it again and pushed it through my lips with one finger. I made sure to pull my finger out of my mouth very slowly.

Then I turned to the quiet girl on my left. "Angela, what's your next class again?"


-oOoOo- Tuesday -oOoOo-


Tuesday hadn't been bad at all.

It was still damp, gloomy, and drippy, but less people stared at me—my shiny newness wearing off for them already. Or maybe it was the Minnesota Wild hockey jersey. Folks didn't seem real interested in that sport in Forks. Maybe they were more into the log rolling and shit. I wondered if there was an official team? Did they have a mascot?

Noodles skipped up to me as I entered the first period class, cherubic face beaming, and asked, "So, you're a hockey fan?"

"No. I bought it because it's green."

I made a mad dash for my seat and prayed it would be lunchtime soon. My mission to ditch Noodles wasn't working so well.

Later, in my class with Jessica, I could see she was about to explode with some sort of juicy tidbit, but she wouldn't even give me a hint. She quivered excitedly throughout the whole period, and when the bell finally rang, she grabbed my wrist and dragged me out into the hallway.

"Bella! You'll never guess!" She squealed and bounced on her toes, pretty curls flying. "Edward isn't in school today!"

Baffled, I stared at her. "Edward who?"

"Edward who? Edward Cullen. Yesterday afternoon Kaly and Tracey saw him running to the office, then, like, two seconds later he burst through the door and ran outside. Lisa, Skye, and Suzie saw him run to the parking lot, jump in his car, and he burned rubber and fishtailed all the way to the highway!" She jerked me into the lunch line with her. "I was talking to Natalie later and she said he had a psychotic break. Then Cathy told me he had to be sent away. They think he's been hospitalized." Her eyes were wide with the alleged scandal as she picked up a salad to put on her tray.

I grabbed my own bottle of lemonade so Noodles wouldn't be tempted to splurge on me again. "It's a wonder he didn't take out a busload of nuns and orphans driving like that. Glad he's gone. He's a freak, and I only mean that in the shittiest of ways."

As Jessica followed me over to our table, I scanned the lunch room then set my Thunder Cats lunch bag on the table and dropped into a chair. There were only four at the pretty alien people table, and they were all staring at me, including the god-like Mr. Crankypants.

"What do you mean he's a freak? He's gorgeous!" Jessica picked a carrot out of her salad and munched on it.

"Well, he is quite flamboyantly pretty, but being pretty doesn't preclude him from being a freak or an asshole. He's in my biology class after lunch." I pulled the chicken and romaine lettuce tortilla wrap out of my bag and peeled off the plastic. "The teacher made me go sit by him because that was the only empty seat, and the Poindexter held his nose and glared at me like I had stepped in dog shit or something." I rolled my eyes. I knew damn well I didn't smell bad. "Then the asshole scooted his chair as far from me as he could get, and I swear he was holding his breath."

By that time, everyone at the table was eyeing me with rapt attention. I glanced over at Marvin Milktoast's brothers and sisters. The girls appeared to be angry, but the big one had his hand over his mouth because he was laughing, and the golden Jasper god appeared to be less grumpy.

Were they listening? There was no way they could hear what I was saying.

"So, what happened next?"

I thought it was Ensign-Eric-of-the-USS-Enterprise that asked.

Snarling at the incident, I dumped my apple out of the bag. When that asswipe Edward had scooted his chair away yesterday, I had flipped my hair at him and showed him my back. Shunning the weenie had been a valid response, I had thought. "He was a prick. I hope he stays away." I slapped my hand down on the bag, flattening it. "Well, then he choked or gagged or something, leapt up out of his chair, and bolted from the room. He didn't even say anything to the teacher."

"And you didn't tell me?" Jessica exclaimed.

"What's to tell? Jerky jerk was being a jerk. How is that news?"

I knew I heard a laugh. I peered across the room and saw the Cullen girls leaving in a huff, but Gargantu-Dude was grinning again, and he and Mr. Mancandy were looking right at me.


"They hardly ever miss school. Well, except when it's actually sunny which is hardly ever," Jessica said breathily. "Then they go camping or hiking or something outdoorsy like that. And they all always miss school together." She brought her finger to her chin and her eyebrows drew together. "I don't think I've ever seen just one of them take a day off."


Outdoorsy? Then they should all be bronzed gods and goddesses, not a flock of albino beauties.

Miss Universe and her faithful companion Pixie Stick Legs didn't strike me as the type that would camp anywhere but the Ritz Carlton.

I raised an eyebrow at them, and I swear it was like Lucifer himself took possession of my soul. I picked up my chicken wrap, licked along the seam of the tortilla, and while closing my eyes halfway, took the end very slowly into my mouth.

Big Dude's eyes widened in surprise, and he gave his brother the side-eye. The fuck-hot piece of man meat never even twitched, but I could have sworn he was amused.


-oOoOo- Wednesday -oOoOo-


Wednesday was interesting.

Noodles changed his tactics and ambushed me in the parking lot as I got out of my truck. I concluded I needed a new mission: really try to avoid Mike Noodles.

He took one look at my Notre Dame sweatshirt and asked, "Oh, you're a fan of the Fighting Irish?"

"No. I bought it because it was green." I ducked my head and made a beeline for the school, running right into Mr. Long-Tall-and-Lickable near the door.

I bounced off him and stumbled back, but somehow managed to keep my feet. Then I smelled him. Jessica had been right. If I could bottle that shit I'd be a gazillionaire in a week-and-a-half and nine months later there'd be a population explosion of the likes the world had never seen.

I stepped toward him and sniffed, long and loud, pulling as much Jasper scented air into my lungs as possible. I couldn't really describe what he smelled like but it made me think of the scorching sunshine in the desert southwest, and leather saddles, and cowboys in boots and hats, and thick leather belts with those plate-sized rodeo buckles and leather chaps, and some kind of warm spice, and goddamn if I didn't want to hop on and ride that cowboy until I fucking screamed. Or he did. Then I'd yell "yippie-ki-ay, motherfucker" and mount that saddle horn again.

Holy shit, if sex could smell like something that's what it would smell like. Jasper Hale smelled like sex. It just fucking oozed out of him.

I wanted him.

I wanted him bad.

I had a new new mission.

"Er, Bella?"

I opened my eyes, not even realizing I'd shut them. My nose was about two inches away from a denim shirt, and I couldn't help taking in another deep breath. I think I might have groaned a little.


It was my buddy Jessica trying to get my attention through the sex-fog-oh-please-fuck-me-now-haze in my brain.

My eyes moved up the placket of the denim shirt, over the collar opened to a deep green turtleneck, and up to the sex god's face that had the barest trace of five o'clock shadow over his firm jaw and chin that had a hint of a cleft. I quickly considered dropping to my knees in front of the God of Sex and worshiping his …

I licked my lips.

Jessica poked me in the back.

Jasper wasn't smiling but something in his strangely amber-colored eyes told me he was amused again.

I'd never seen eyes that color before. They were a little darker than his hair. And his hair was beautiful. I could just imagine my fingers combing through those silky, honeyed strands and then clenching fistfuls as I held his face to my …

I quivered.

Jessica tugged at my sleeve, and I stepped back. I looked down his long form and saw he was wearing black cowboy boots, dark blue jeans, and a black leather belt, in addition to the denim shirt and turtleneck. I'd never noticed before how fucking, goddamn sexy turtlenecks were. I smirked up at Jasper and said, "See ya at lunch, cowboy."

Only his left eyebrow moved an infinitesimal amount.

Jessica yanked me away and hauled me into the school. "Oh, my God! Bella! I can't believe you ran right into him! You talked to him! Oh, my God!"

"I was trying to get away from Noo … er, Mike and … and why the hell was he standing by the door like that?"

"I don't know. Alice, Emmett, and Rosalie had already gone inside." She steered me down the hall toward my English class. "What did it feel like?"


"You ran right into his chest." She rolled her eyes at me like I was the village idiot. Well, I kind of was. "What did it feel like? They're all so buff!"

"It felt like … hard."


"His chest. It was … hard."

We stopped in front of the door to my class, and Jessica was shaking her head at me like my position as village idiot had been confirmed.

"I can't believe you actually talked to him. I can't ever think of a thing to say. I know I must look like a moron. I mean, they're all gorgeous, but it's intimidating and … well, anyhow, where did you come up with cowboy?"

"Uh, he's wearing boots. I'll see you in trig, right?"

"Okay, Bella. See ya!" Jessica and her curls bounced on down the corridor.

I walked through the doorway and came to a dead stop. Big Dude was sitting in my seat at the back of the room.

Mr. Dimpleface was grinning like the cat that ate the canary and that made me instantly suspicious. Giving his smiley self another once over, I saw that his colossal form was actually taking up my seat and another one. I sighed wearily and clomped to the back of the room, stopped next to him, and waited for him to get the hell out of my chair.

"Bella, right? I'm Emmett. I was just savin' you a spot." He scooted over and patted the seat. His hand was so big it nearly covered it.

"You didn't need to save it. That is my seat." I dropped my backpack on the desk and flopped onto the wooden chair. "What are you doing here? This isn't your class. Aren't you a senior?"

"Transferred over. Need the credit. I knew that was your seat." He grinned at me again as he propped his thickly muscled arms on the desk. "You a fan of Notre Dame?"

His eyes were the same color as Jasper's. I thought they had all been adopted. How could they have the same eye color? Contacts? Talk about family solidarity and shit. Sheesh.

I glanced down at the leprechaun on my jersey. "No. I bought it because it was green."

He looked a little muddled for a moment then his face brightened again. "Sooooooo … what did you pack for lunch today?"




Well, that was … bizarre. Emmett was waiting for me outside the door to my trig class and escorted me to lunch. He bought me an orange juice while Jessica followed at a safe distance. Not talking—which was pretty damn odd, too.

When we arrived at my table, Emmett pulled out the chair that Jessica normally sat in and gestured for me to take it. Didn't want to argue with my new buddy, so I sat down.

He said, "See ya, Babe." He raised his massive fist, and I bumped it with my teeny tiny one.

"See ya, Big Dude."

As he sauntered across the cafeteria, I started unloading my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles lunch bag. I noticed it was too quiet and looked up. Everybody at the table was staring at me, dumbfounded. Even some of the kids at other tables were gawking at me or watching Emmett walk to his table.


Noodles—who hadn't been near me for a while—gulped and said in awe, "How did you do that?"

"Do what?" I unwrapped the turkey and cucumber slice sandwich and took a bite.

"He sat next to you in English, and he's a senior. What's he doing in eleventh grade English Lit? Then he walked you here, and … and … he fist bumped you and called you babe."

I sighed in exasperation. "Have any of you tried to even talk to any of them? Emmett's funny as shit. It's a wonder we weren't kicked out of class or got detention or something, though detention with Emmett would be hilarious."

While they all looked at me with some strange mixture of admiration and amazement, I pulled the top off my container of peach slices. I peered across the room to check out my new bud's table.

I noticed that from my new position, I had almost a direct view of Jasper. I also noticed that he and Emmett were sitting next to each other on one side of the table, and Alice and Rosalie were on the other side. The tiny, dark-haired girl used to sit next to Jasper.

Of course, Pencil-neckward wasn't back yet from his vacation or committal or whatever, but up until then they had stayed in their usual seats. Then they switched. I couldn't figure it out.

Something was going on.

Did my new pal have some sort of ulterior motive in seating me in Jessica's usual chair?

Was he up to something? A senior showing up in a junior's English lit class, sitting next to me, walking me to lunch, and blowing everybody's mind?

Was he setting me up? Was it a big joke on the new kid in school?

The game was afoot.

I'd figure it out eventually, but it was time to commence with my new mission. Using my fingers, I plucked a peach slice out of the plastic bowl and slowly lifted it, watching Jasper from the corner of my eye. As I raised it up, I opened my mouth and started to stick my tongue out to catch the syrup that dripped from it. I licked the tip then slowly sucked it into my mouth.

Reaching for the second slice, I heard Noodles give out a strangled cough, and Eric suddenly had to leave the table.

"What are you doing, Bella?" Jessica asked me tensely through her teeth.

"Eating. Why?" I innocently asked.

"Er, nothing. So, Lauren, did you see this article in the new Cosmo?" Jessica turned away from me and slapped the glossy magazine down on the table in front of Lauren who was giving me the stink eye because Tyler was ogling me.

Well, you know what they say in the old country: fuck 'em.

I was on a highly sensitive and conceivably dangerous mission. Collateral damage was always a possibility.

I fished out another peach slice and held it up. I noticed that Jasper had pushed his lunch tray away, and his right hand was spread out flat on the table top. I let a few drops of the syrupy juice drip onto my mouth and then I sucked the slice through my lips. I looked directly at Jasper, and using the index finger of my left hand, I started at my chin and gathered the sticky drops that had fallen.

Beginning low on my finger, I ran my tongue very deliberately up the side. When I reached the tip, I pursed my lips and slid it into my mouth.

A few things happened then. Noodles let out a weird "urp" noise, and Lauren screeched angrily and flounced away from the table, hauling the bug-eyed Tyler behind her. Angela and Ben, who had been absorbed in each other, glanced around curiously, shrugged their shoulders and put their heads back together over some palm pilot pad thing. Jessica was staring at me in shock with her mouth hanging open.

And Jasper's hand closed into a tight fist.


-oOoOo- Monday -oOoOo-


I couldn't wait for school on Monday. Thursday and Friday last week had been just so-so kind of days. I hadn't gotten any kind of reaction out of Jasper at lunch time. I was determined to make him at least twitch or something.

I'd spent all weekend clearing out homework and planning my lunch menu for the next week. Bananas were really obvious, but I couldn't not use one. Believe it or not, I'd found cherries with stems at the grocery store, along with some strawberries. They would probably suck since they had to be from South America or some shit, but they would do. I had also bought an avocado and more cans of peaches. Jasper had seemed to like the them.

I thought I would start with the avocado. Not an obvious erotic fruit, but I thought I could steer Mr. Sex-on-Legs in the right direction.

When I arrived at school, Emmett came out of nowhere and met me at my truck. I was a little startled at his appearance, but I was glad to see him. He was like my new bestie.

With a few reservations.

Allegedly, he was dating Rosalie, which led to all kids of sordid, despicable, and depraved thoughts considering they lived in the same house, so I was curious as to why he wasn't with her.

But, what the hell? Even if he was setting me up for something, I could still enjoy his company in the meantime. Dudebro was a fucking riot.

"Hey, Gargantu-Dude. What's up?" I greeted him as I climbed out of my old clunker. I scanned the parking lot and sidewalks into school and saw Jasper standing under the canopy not far from the front doors, the other students giving him a wide berth. When I really started to wonder why Emmett was meeting me at the truck, I saw Jasper stiffen and begin to walk toward us through the misty drizzle.

"Nothin' much is up, Babe. I was just curious about what you brought to tease Jasper with today." He burst out laughing and hoisted my backpack to his left shoulder.

His laugh was so infectious, I had to laugh with him as we headed for the school. He had nagged me half to death last week, using the puppy lasers and those dimples, until I finally confessed my mission to him. He had roared with laughter and said, "Like it wasn't obvious, Babe."

Of course, I had replied with, "Then why'd you ask?"

I knew Jasper was a little interested—Emmett had confirmed it—but I couldn't figure out what he was waiting for. I was a girl, he was a guy. I was a junior, he was a senior, so it wasn't like he was too old for me. Apparently he wasn't dating anyone. I sure wasn't. I'd broken up with my boyfriend after one last goodbye fuck-fest right before I'd come to Forks. So what was the hold up?

Maybe he was shy? Jasper didn't seem to be the bashful type, though I hadn't heard him speak a word yet.

It was really weird.

If Emmett knew, he wasn't telling. It was aggravating. He'd even told me Jasper thought I was cute. It was driving me insane.

But what if it was all part of the set-up?

Then Emmett had said we needed to make it really interesting. He bet that no matter what fruit I assaulted I wouldn't break Jasper until the middle of the marking period.

That had given me a secret thrill, because if it was true, that meant he was open to the idea.

I had bet that I'd have him broken and saddled up by the end of the week.

The stakes? A one hundred percent, all-American greenback with George Washington's picture on it.

Yeah, me and the Big Dude were high rollers.

He slung his huge arm around my shoulders and asked me what I brought for lunch.

I pointed my finger at his dimpled face and hissed, "Stop it!" then I realized Jasper wasn't that far away. Had he heard Emmett?

"She won't let me copy her homework, Jazzman. She's a hard, hard woman."

Relieved that Emmett covered for me, I just smiled demurely up at Jasper. I couldn't help taking in a deep breath in order to get another hit of the Jazzman's fuck-me flavor.

Far be it from me to say anything off color, but his smell had me creamin' my jeans, as they say.

Oh, my fucking God.

He didn't say a word, but he nodded at me.

I could have sworn he almost cracked a smile.





Emmett escorted me to lunch again, which was always fun times. It was like the kids could feel us coming toward them and they'd part like the Red Sea for Moses. It was hysterical.

He left me at my table after buying me an iced tea, and gave me a thumbs-up and a wink.

"It's going to be interesting today, Em. If this doesn't get to him, tomorrow should blow his mind." I winked back at him.

"Damn, girl. You are cruel. I can't fuckin' wait!" He laughed all the way to his table.

That's when I saw Edward. He was back. I rolled my eyes, groaned, and dropped onto my chair. Slicing and dicing small woodland creatures in Biology had been so pleasant without him.

"Hi again, Jess," I said as if I hadn't seen her just ten minutes before in our last class. I started pulling stuff out of my Power Puff Girls lunch bag.

"Hi, Bella. What's it going to be today?" She chuckled.

I just waggled my eyebrows at her.

A bad habit I had picked up from Emmett already.

She had forgiven me for being an exhibitionist jerk last week after I told her what I was doing. She hadn't thought I would succeed, but she gave me points for having such a lofty goal. According to Jessica, none of the Cullens had ever dated anyone from school.

Welp. Go big or go home, right?

I'd told the rest of the group I was teasing the Cullen-collective just to get some sort of reaction out of them.

Eric thought the plan was funny, and he hoped it would work. It seemed he had a bit of a crush on Jasper, too. I couldn't figure out if Eric was gay, if he was fanboying, or if it was one of those unrequited bromance things.

Ben and Angela had been scandalized. Angela's father was a preacher and that could have had something to do with it, but they hadn't left the table.

Whatever. I had already figured I was going to Hell. I was just trying to get a good spot.

Mysteriously, and to my utter relief, Noodles and Tyler had been avoiding me, so that meant Lauren wasn't hanging around either, which tickled me right down to my toes. That had started around the same time Emmett began walking with me to lunch.

I leaned over the table and pulled the avocado out of the Ziploc bag, having already cut it in half and removing the pit.

Jess's brow wrinkled as she took in the bumpy green fruit. "An avocado?"

"Yeah. It's shaped like a …" I pointed down to my lap.

"What? Oh!" Jessica slapped her hand over her mouth and started giggling. "Bella, I think you're putting entirely too much thought into this. Why don't you just bring in a banana?"

"It's on the list. Did you notice Edward was back?"

"He is?" Her head shot up and snapped toward Jasper's table.

I swear she just swooned or some shit.

"He's just so beautiful and elegant. If he was hospitalized with a psychotic break, how could he be back so soon?"

"He didn't have a psychotic break," I said disdainfully. "Emmett said it was personal family business, which sounds like total bullshit to me, but whatever. Poor little schnookums probably forgot he had a spa and chemical peel planned and that's why he ran out of here last week. I wish he would go back to wherever the hell he went."

Emmett's boisterous guffaw rang out again, causing my eyes to narrow suspiciously.

It was just too coincidental sometimes when he laughed. It was hard to tell though. He laughed all the damn time. He was about the giddiest damn guy I'd ever met.

I peeked at them through my eyelashes while I quickly ate my ham and dill pickle sandwich. I could have sworn he was laughing at Edward. Like Emmett jabbing him in the ribs with his elbow didn't give me a clue.

I studied Edward a little more closely. He was sitting with slumped shoulders, his head hanging down, elbows propped on his thighs, and his hands dangling loosely between his knees. He looked like crap with those dark circles under his eyes. Wherever he had been, it hadn't done him any good. Maybe he had been sick.

But who gave a shit? I was on a mission and it was nearly go time.

Jess was talking with Angela as I shoved the wrapper from my sandwich back into the bag and picked up the avocado. Holding it upright, I separated the two halves. Shifting my eyes just enough to see Jasper's table, I saw I had everyone's undivided attention.

Pretending to ignore them, I set one half of the meaty fruit on the table and seductively caressed the other. Little Alice's mouth dropped open, she jumped up from her chair, and stamped out of the room on her skinny turkey legs.

Holding it near my face, I slowly spun the avocado so my intended audience could get a good look at it, and slowly turned it so the narrow end was down. Jasper just sat there with no expression on his face as usual, but Emmett, Edward, and Rosalie were looking perplexed.

Not that I wanted to be obvious, but I took great pleasure in licking the index and middle finger of my left hand. Turning my hand, I placed my fingernails against the tip of the avocado and worked them upward, while I parted my lips and took in a deep breath. I drew my fingers back down the center of the avocado and brought them to my lips, licked them and sucked them into my mouth.

Rosalie's eyes flew open, she grabbed her purse, and stormed out of the cafeteria, silk scarves fluttering behind her.

It appeared the girls were a little quicker than the boys.

I sucked and licked those two fingers as if they were the best thing I had ever eaten.

Jessica started to snicker, her hand over her mouth, and she whispered, "Look at Edward." She was trying to hide behind a magazine and not choke on her pizza.

Edward had a death grip on the bridge of his nose, and he looked as if he'd eaten a bug and was going to puke.

Emmett had quite the smirk on his face.

Nothing from Jasper.

Fingers thoroughly tongued, I turned slightly to the avocado and closed my eyes and inhaled, then ran the tip of my tongue over my bottom lip. Next, I kissed the avocado and licked unhurriedly up the center with a broad stroke, ending with a long, deep "mmmmmmmmm."

Edward couldn't get out of the room fast enough. He flew out the doors.

Jessica snorted and dropped her head to the table behind her magazine, her shoulders shaking with her giggles.

With the tip of my tongue I touched the center of the avocado, twirled it around and then, just for fun, I gasped loudly, threw my head back, and moaned.

I peeked just in time to see Jasper's eyes widen.


-oOoOo- Tuesday -oOoOo-


Lunch on Tuesday made even me break out in a sweat.

Earlier in English class, I had asked Emmett again if he had told Jasper what I was doing exactly, and he swore to Jesus, the Pope, and all the saints that he hadn't.

With that mouth on him? Yeah, right. Just about any time he opened his pie hole my first thought was altar boy.

I'd threatened him with a junk punch if he blabbed and tried to cheat on our bet. He held his hands up in front of me like he was trying to ward me off and had said, "You can screw around with Jasper's junk all you want. Don't be threatenin' Big Dale."

"Big Dale? You call your winkie Big Dale?"

"It ain't no winkie. It's a whopper, and Dale is my middle name."

Sure. That made perfect sense.


Jasper wasn't stupid. He had to know what I was doing—it was so fucking obvious—but I wanted to try and make sure Emmett hadn't spilled the beans. He had said he was having too much fun and couldn't wait to see what I would do next. That had actually been encouraging.

Interestingly, the girls and Edward were not at lunch. Perhaps they had decided to go to the spa together.

Emmett grinned at me and patted my back as he left me at my lunch table. Jessica was giggling already as she sat her tray on the table.

"What did you bring today?"

I smirked at her and pulled a bag of cherries out of my Animaniacs lunch bag.

A blank look crossed her face for a moment then she gasped, slapped her hand over her mouth and burst into a fit of giggles. "Oh. My. God, Bella! I can't believe you!" When she caught her breath, she sighed and sat back in her chair, shaking her head. "What are you bringing tomorrow?"

I shrugged. "Just a banana."

Jess snorted. "After what you've done to the other fruit, I can't wait to see what you do to a banana."

"Just the normal stuff. Licking, sucking … biting and…" I added quite the dramatic pause, "… swallowing."

Emmett choked and started coughing.

I knew it! That son of a bitch could hear me from across the room. If he could, I was sure Jasper could. All the rest of them, too. I would have to think of some way to really test that theory.

What the hell was up with them? Was Eric right? Were they aliens, for Christ's sake? Or did Doctor Daddy-o implant bionic hearing devices in their heads or something?

Cyborgs. Were they cyborgs like the Terminator? Is that why they all had those yellow eyes and Jasper's chest and Emmett's arms were so hard?

Naturally, that made me wonder what else Jasper might have that was hard.

Anyhow, I didn't know what, but something was different about them. They weren't just pale, pretty, rich kids.

Dismissing the crazy sci-fi musings for the time being and concentrating on my mission of a close encounter of the erotic kind—because if it didn't happen soon I was going to fucking spontaneously combust—I wolfed down my soggy cheese and tomato sandwich.

I thought again about what a perfect angle I had in that chair. I could molest fruit to my heart's content and see Jasper in the background.

It was fucking excellent.

I had carefully selected just the right cherries and pulled the first set of two out of the bag. I held them up in front of my face with my left hand and lightly ran my right index finger under the dangling, dark red fruits. I kissed each one, lightly licked them, and kissed them again. Unhurriedly, I took them into my mouth, closed my lips over them, and popped the stems off.

I leisurely chewed them and swallowed. They had tasted better than I expected. I plucked the next pair of cherries out of the bag. They were bigger than the previous two.

Jasper hadn't moved. How the hell could he sit so still? Emmett was across the table from him and had shifted around in his chair and propped his chin on his fist. He was watching Jasper.

Okay, it was time to amp it up. I raised the two big cherries and moved my head back and forth to drag my lips over them, then poked my tongue out and ran it under the bottom of both. I curled it over the left one, getting it nice and wet. I sucked it halfway into my mouth and moaned, closing my eyes to mere slits. I opened my mouth, drew in a breath, then pursed my lips and exhaled. Cocking my head, I licked across both cherries, kissed them both and licked them again. Running the tip of my tongue over my lips to wet them, I opened my mouth just beneath the cherries, sucked one in and bit into it, letting the deep red juice run down my chin.

Jasper leaned forward.


-oOoOo- Wednesday -oOoOo-


Wednesday dawned dark and dreary, and as I gazed out my bedroom window, I just knew it would be a momentous day. I had a feeling down deep in my bones.

And my, er, nether regions had quite a feeling, too—a quite warm and tingly one.

I put on my Boston Celtics jersey over my newly acquired black turtleneck and carefully packed my lunch in my Max Headroom lunchbox.

I was relieved to see that Charlie had left early again. I didn't want to have to explain why I was so excited. Maybe I'd had some really good dreams. I wished I could remember them because I figured they had contributed to the warm and tingly feelings.

Grabbing all my stuff, I hurried out the front door and didn't even care that it was another cold, rainy day as I skipped to my truck.

I almost fell the fuck out when I saw Emmett standing next to it.

"Big Dude! What the hell are you doing here? And … what happened to your clothes?" He looked like he'd been mugged or something.

Who the hell would even try to mug him?

There was mud on his pants and jacket, and he looked kind of … disheveled. I hadn't ever even seen him dirty before, let alone all frumpy and wrinkled.

"Nothin'." He glanced past me toward the woods behind my house then a big smile broke across his face. "Er, actually, my Jeep broke down back that way," he waved vaguely down the street, "and I was walking up the road, saw your truck, and …"

"Need a ride to school?"

He just nodded, and his eyes shifted to the woods again and back to me.

What the hell was going on? Deciding to play along with whatever he was bullshitting me about; I unlocked the truck and climbed in.

"Do you need anything out of your Jeep? We could drive back and get it."

"Uh, no. Just, ya know, go to school." He shrugged and smiled quickly at me.

Once his massive bulk was in the truck there was hardly any room for me, but I managed to turn the key. The engine roared to life and I smiled. Nothing thundered quite like my beloved hunk-a-junk. Putting it in first gear, I happily, and noisily, made my rumbling way to school.

Whatever Emmett was nervous about, I guess he got over, because the big goof asked me if I was Irish.

"What?" Did he actually have an accident in his Jeep and crack his dome? I didn't see any bruises or knots on his head.

He grinned again and pointed at my Celtics jersey.

Oh. "No. I bought it because it was green."

We both broke into stupid giggles and laughed the rest of the way to Forks High.

Once we got to school, Emmett was fine, except for the messed up clothes part, and we clambered out of the truck. I slammed the door shut and when I turned around, Jasper was standing right there.

More than a little astonished, I stumbled back against the fender. I hadn't seen him anywhere in the parking lot. It was like he had just materialized right behind me.

"J-J-Jasper. S'up?"

His liquid amber eyes looked into mine; he took in a breath, and said, "Bella."

That was the first time he had spoken to me, and he had said my name! His deep, rich voice rang with smooth, mellow tones that sank right into me and flowed right to my … er, avocado, then a burst of intense heat flowed up and through me, and I knew my face had to be flushing bright crimson because I was suddenly so damn warm.

God! I almost never blushed and there I was, blazing red right in front of the sexiest, most beautiful thing I'd ever seen in my whole life. Well, it wasn't a blush exactly. It was more like a hormonal hot flash.

Oh, God. He was wearing a black turtleneck just like I was.

It looked a lot better on him.

Maybe my mouth had fallen open and my jaw was dangling in the breeze. I wasn't sure because then his full, sensuous lips parted again, and he said, "Hold out your hand, Bella."

Instantaneously, my open palm was out in front of me. I couldn't have refused him if I'd wanted to. He could have told me to jump off the space needle in Seattle and I would have done it.

He reached into the pocket of his fleece-lined denim jacket and set something round and cool in my hand, the tips of his fingers brushing lightly across my skin. Where he had touched me felt as if it was on fire, but I was incapable of tearing my eyes away from his to check for any scorch marks or blisters.

It was like I had sunk into those pools of liquid gold. I could drown in them, and I didn't care because I wanted to. Then his scent hit me, and I felt my eyes go wide as I took a step toward him. I had to be closer to him.

I wanted to fucking lick him.

I swallowed and licked my lips instead. His eyes flicked downward, and it was if I could feel his gaze on my mouth. It was … hot, electric, sizzling. Then his eyes were back on mine.

His expression didn't change, but I knew he was amused, interested, curious, and … attracted to me. I didn't know how I knew, but I knew.

A glint of something shone in his eyes. Mischief? Humor? Challenge?

"I'm looking forward to lunch," he said quietly and just the very edges of his so very kissable lips twitched as if he was suppressing a smile. He eyes went to Emmett, who had magically appeared next to me, and Jasper nodded just once. He turned away to walk toward the school.

My breath whooshed out of me. I fell back and thumped against my truck, needing the support because I was suddenly light-headed. I couldn't think—his smell was in my brain, and it had turned into gloppy, day-old oatmeal.

Finally, stupidly, I said, "Sure. Lunch. Right."

Hell, he was gone!

Emmett cleared his throat lightly to get my attention. One eyebrow was raised, his head was cocked to the side, and there was a little smirky smile on his face. "Ready to go to class?"

Speechless, I could only nod. Then I remembered Jasper had put something in my hand.

A peach.




Damn that Emmett! It was all his fucking fault. After Mr. Banner had told us to knock it off and quit making fun of those two morons in Romeo and Juliet, Emmett just had to keep it up, and we both got slapped with detention after school.

That should crush the rumor that the Cullens never got in trouble.

Mr. Banner had picked some gangly boy to read a passage, and after every damn sentence the kid would stumble and stutter through, Emmett would change the words, coming up with some really fucking stupid shit, and whisper them to me.

I was holding my own until we got to the next scene and Emmett said, "What wipe threw bondo window breaks? It is the beast, and Isabella is the one."

See? Just fucking stupid, but I totally lost it and brayed just like a fucking jack ass. The teacher turned so purple, I thought he was going to have a stroke.

It had been a couple years since I'd been sentenced to detention, so I guess it wasn't that bad. At least Emmett would be there. It should be pretty funny.

Hell, it should be great.

As a matter of fact, I started looking forward to it.

But, first there was lunch and the continuation of my mission: Get Up Close and Personal with Jasper the Sex God's O Face.

Or: O Jasper! My Jasper! as Emmett liked to call it.

It was pretty obvious I had the hots for Jasper—how could he miss those subtle clues I was giving him, right? So, Emmett could call it anything he wanted as long as he didn't sing like a stool pigeon and tell Jasper about our bet.

It was Wednesday already. Time was slipping by, but I was going to win that bet! Of course, the best part would be actually getting into those jeans that hugged his perfect ass and gave just a hint of the other treasures that lay within.

The sooner the better, too, because I thought my ovaries were about to explode, and if I got any, uh … moister … I'd slide out of my damn chair.

Would lunch time ever arrive?

Then there was the peach. A gift from Jasper.

I couldn't decide if the peach was some kind of message from Jasper. Well, it was obviously some sort of message, but what? Was it a joke? Was he mocking me? Did it mean he liked it when I had eaten the peach slices? Did it mean he liked peaches? Or did he want me to do something to him with a peach?

I thought maybe I could come up with a couple of ideas.

I quivered and kind of wiggled in my seat. It was getting awfully warm in trigonometry.

Why wasn't it lunch time yet?

Jessica leaned toward me and whispered, "What is wrong with you? You've been fidgeting since we got in here."

"Uh, is it hot in here to you? And, um, I want to go to lunch."

Jess sighed dramatically and patted my arm. "It is not hot in here, and it's not lunch you want." Her eyes darted back and forth as if she was checking to see if anyone was paying attention to us. "What did you bring today?"

"A peach … er, a banana."

"So which is it?"

I wasn't sure why, but I didn't want to tell Jessica that Jasper had given me a peach, but damn! I had to tell somebody!

"This morning before school, Jasper gave me a peach."

"Oh, my God! He did?" she gasped and grabbed my arm, shaking it. "I bet that means he liked what you did with those peaches you were eating." She giggled. "Oh, my God! Let me see!"

Being a gift from the Great God Jasper, I'd hidden the sacred peach in my backpack before Emmett and I had walked into the school, and I'd left it there. I glanced quickly around the room. No one was paying us any mind. I carefully dug the fresh fruit out and brought it to my nose. I always had liked the way they smelled.

Then my I had a meltdown in my brain. And my pants.

"Fuck me to tears, it smells like him." I had been in such a daze earlier I hadn't noticed that the peach had his cologne on it.

Jessica sniffed at it. "I told you they all smelled wonderful."

"Wonderful? He smells beyond wonderful. Christ! I'm drooling right now." I sniffed it again, closing my eyes, drawing his scent as deeply into me as I could get it. "He smells like … He smells like sex, and cowboys, and … and sunshine and sex … and … My God, I could smell only him the rest of my life and never get tired of it."

"If you say so, Bella." Jessica drew back a bit, concern written all over her face. "His cologne does smell really nice, but I wouldn't go that far." She gathered up her papers and trig book and shoved them in her tote bag. "So, are you going to eat the peach or the banana?" She waggled her eyebrows at me.

I inhaled deeply again, trying to get every last bit of the essence of Jasper into me and then sighed. "Well, I think maybe I'll stick with the original plan." I winked at Jessica. "But when you're on a delicate mission, you have to be able to adapt to changing circumstances. I may add the peach to my arsenal."

She giggled and shook her head at me as I wiggled my eyebrows at her, and packed the hallowed peach very meticulously in my lunchbox. I cushioned it between the banana and the olive loaf and Muenster cheese sandwich.

The bell rang, and I practically catapulted out of my chair. I slalomed through and dodged the slackers who were just climbing out of their seats, and blew right by Emmett who was waiting at the door for me.

"Where ya goin', Babe?"

I skidded to a stumbling halt and nearly slammed into the lockers across the hall. "Sorry, Big Dude. Um, starving, ya know."

He draped his arm around my neck and squeezed my head against his hard chest and gave me noogies with his massive fist. "You're full of shit. What did you bring for lunch today?"

"Didn't I already not tell you what I brought?" I smacked him on his stomach, which was also pretty damn concrete-like. "I will continue to not tell you. You'll see soon enough." And so will Jasper. I thought maybe my current state of agitation, anticipation, and arousal would add to the realism of my performance.

Like that method acting shit.

Again, I caught myself not paying attention because I belatedly realized Emmett was dragging me toward the side doors instead of the front where we usually went in.

Oh. We'd be walking right by Emmett and Jasper's table, and lo and behold, the-God-of-the-Seductively-Divine was already there.

Fuck me, he had taken his jacket off and hung it on the back of the chair. That black turtleneck clung to his perfect chest just … er, perfectly … and the sleeves were pushed about halfway up his beautiful, manly forearms.

Then my eyes were fixated on his throat, and out of the blue, I wanted to yank down the soft-looking material concealing his neck and just suck on him, and bite him, and lick him, and rub myself all over him.

It was a total head rush.

Then I tripped. It was a good thing Emmett had his arm around me or I would have face-planted right there in front of the blond god and everybody.

Emmett snickered at me and dragged me across the cafeteria to the lunch line where he bought me an orange juice and then deposited me at my table.

"So, what's for lunch?"

"Dude." I glared at him and pointed across the cafeteria at his table. "Just get your ass over there, sit down, and behave yourself."

"I know you're not going to behave your self." He laughed all the way over to his table.

Like every other day that he walked me lunch, Jessica was staring at him with a glazed look in her eyes. I wondered what the hell she would do if Edward happened to show up, stop by the table, and say, "How-de-do?"

She snapped out of it and gave me a kind of revolted look as I gobbled my sandwich.

After a moment she brightened and a sly look crossed her features. "So, Bella, I hear you and Emmett have detention after school today."

Man, shit spread fast through that place.

I nodded and crammed in another mouthful. After finally clearing my mouth, I said, "Yeah, Emmett was being a jerk in English." Pausing to give it a bit of reconsideration, I decided I had to be fair to the ass. "Actually, Mr. Banner didn't appreciate Emmett's interpretation of the Bard and decided we needed further indoctrination." I shoved in another mouthful of olive loaf.

"Are you sure you just don't want a little one-on-one time with Emmett? You two seem to spend a lot of time with each other."

The light didn't just dawn—it was like the retina-incinerating flash of a nuclear detonation. The perfect opportunity to check on the bionic and or extraterrestrial super-hearing of the Cullens just fell into my lap, and my bud Jessica dropped it there!

Well, just Jasper and Emmett since the other ones hadn't been around.

Okay, it wasn't perfect. Exactly.

All right, it probably wouldn't work, but I had to give it shot. Right?

I glanced back and forth as if I was checking for eavesdroppers and leaned forward, keeping Jasper and Emmett in my field of view beyond Jessica.

I loved that angle my seat gave me.

"Well, Jess," I began with a whisper, "You're right. Emmett and I do spend a lot of time together, and you know how he keeps hugging me and shit? Well, sometimes those hugs are pretty intense and let's just say his biceps aren't the only big muscle he's got, if you know what I mean."

I did the obligatory eyebrow waggle while Jessica giggled, and I heard a growl from across the room. I kept my eyes on Jess, but could see the look of utter shock on Emmett's face. Fear crept over his features and his head turned slowly toward Jasper. He hadn't moved, but his expressionless face somehow seemed stonier and colder than I'd ever seen it before.

Not that I'd been in Forks very long, or seen much of Jasper at all, but somehow I got the definite impression that he was pissed off.

It was only two of many, but those mysteries were solved. They could hear me from across the room and that golden, fuck-hot, panty-soaking, exquisitely gorgeous creature was interested.

Feeling a little smug, I stuffed the last bit of bread in my mouth.

Giggling and flushing pink, Jessica asked, "Still going with the banana?"

I could only nod as I forced down the last bit of bread and tried to wash it down with the orange juice without choking. Having need of the Heimlich maneuver would seriously disrupt my plans of performing fruit fellatio.

I shoved the sandwich wrapper in my lunchbox and lifted out the peach, bringing it to my nose. Jasper's heavenly scent was still there, and I inhaled deeply, closing my eyes to slits and letting the warm feeling it gave me wash over me.

It was just … wonderful. I couldn't help nuzzling the soft fuzz of the skin, then I kissed it and gave it a quick lick. I could almost taste him. Drawing it across my lips, I lowered my head and looked at Jasper from the corner of my eye. I was pretty damn sure he was paying close attention. I set the peach back in my lunch box.

On with the mission! The banana peeled easily, and I pretended to contemplate it as I saw Emmett scoot his chair farther away from Jasper.

That was intriguing.

I licked the tip of the yellow fruit and began nibbling very lightly about an inch below the end. There was no way anyone could have called me a sculptor, but I'd seen enough cock I thought I could carve a reasonable approximation with my teeth.

It was the thought that counted, right?

As I worked my mouth around, the banana became slimier and slimier, but I was on a mission, and I would not be deterred.

I rounded off the tip just a touch and held up my masterpiece for inspection.

Jessica was tittering and giggling while I was working, and when I held it up she finally snorted and slapped her hand over her mouth, squeezed her eyes shut, and dropped her head to the table.

"Oh, my God, Bella," she gasped. "That's pretty good. I mean, it actually kinda looks like a …" She couldn't speak anymore. She covered her face with her hands. "Oh. My. God." She crossed her arms on the table and hid her face.

Dipping my head, I placed my flattened tongue at the bottom of the banana and drew it up slowly until I reached the "head" and kissed it.

A few seats down, Angela cleared her throat very loudly as a strange squeaking noise came from that nice boy Ben.

My performance seemed to be having an effect on somebody, at least. Emmett was still nervously eyeing Jasper and he hadn't moved.

I licked down the side toward my hand, turned my head and ran my tongue back up. Dipping my head, I looked up at Jasper as I circled the tip with my tongue and then sucked it into my mouth.

Jasper crossed his legs.




I thought school would never be over. I couldn't fucking wait for detention! When the last bell rang, I stuffed all my papers into my backpack, threw on my pea coat and did that race-walk thing back to Mr. Banner's classroom, fighting against the tide of students trying to get the hell out of the school.

Fidgeting outside the door as I waited for the last of the kids to finally leave, I scanned up and down the emptying halls for Emmett's bulk.

He was so damn huge, there was no way I could miss him, but I didn't see him anywhere. Surely, he wouldn't get a wild hair and skip out on his well-deserved punishment?

And then Emmett would say, "And don't call me Shirley."

I had to suppress a snort as Mr. Banner grabbed a stack of papers from his desk and started to shuffle toward me.

Trying to look properly contrite and ashamed, I clutched my backpack and lunchbox to my chest and trained my eyes on Mr. Banner's Hush Puppies that were getting closer.

Those beigey-grey suede shoes stopped in front of me and from above my head, Mr. Banner's stern voice said, "Please go inside and have a seat, Miss Swan. I'll be back shortly."

Nodding mutely and not even meeting his eyes because I thought I might crack up right in his face, I scurried to the back of the classroom and set my stuff on top of my and Emmett's desks, shucked off my coat and draped it over the back of my chair.

I shivered with the memory of lunch time. Hot damn! I had finally gotten a real reaction out of Jasper. Took a week-and-a-half, but the banana fellatio worked.

Where the hell was Emmett? He'd better show up for detention or I was going to be pissed. It was his fault Mr. Banner got mad anyway.

Sighing, I picked the gift peach out of my lunchbox and placed it reverently on the desk, encircling it with my arms and resting my head by my elbow. Closing my eyes as I took in the faint scent of Jasper, I tried to patiently wait for Emmett and Mr. Banner to come back. I could have started on my homework, but I'd much rather breathe in Jasper's scent and fantasize about what I could do to him, if I ever got my hands on him.

After a few minutes, it seemed like Jasper's cologne became stronger, and I took a deep sniff and sighed.

Definitely stronger.

I swear he smelled like sex. Made me want to lick him. Everywhere.

How the hell could his smell get stronger?

I raised my head and Jasper was standing right in front of my desk. Scared the livin' shit out of me! I gasped, jerked back, and almost knocked the peach to the floor.

"Jasper! What the fuck?" I'd never even heard him come in the room. "Did you get detention, too? Where the hell is Dude … uh, Emmett?"

Before I even knew what happened, the lights were turned off, Jasper had me up on my feet, and his long body was pressing me against the counter along the wall behind my desk.

"Uh, what …?"

His face was bent to mine, and he whispered, "Emmett's around." His eyes moved to look out the windows to my left and came back to mine.

They were black. It was not one of those tricks of the low light in the room due to the cloudy, dark day either. The eyes that had been an unusual but beautiful liquid amber were glittering black.

With my next breath, his scent invaded my mind, and he smelled so fucking good, I thought I was going to melt into a puddle on the floor, but his hands were just under my arms on my sides, and his hard body was holding me tightly against the old cabinets.

And that wasn't the only thing that was hard. He was pressing his dick against my stomach.

"Huh?" Yeah. I was chock full of the witty repartee, right?

I just couldn't think. All I could think about was the utterly beautiful god-like man that smelled like sex and had his hands on me—his hard hands that moved so lovingly. His right one was gliding down my left side, and where he touched me erupted into flames.

"Do you have some kind of fruit fetish?" His lips were nearly on mine. They were so close.

Oh, God, his voice was deep and low and smooth, and I was starting to feel dizzy, and my mouth just dropped open and began babbling. "No. No, I have a penis fetish."

He actually smirked, and his black, black eyes glinted with some inner light. Not having seen any expression other than … er, expressionless … on his gorgeous face before, I was stunned stupid again.

"Uh, what are you doing?"

"Claiming what's mine." The tip of his nose grazed my cheek, barely making contact my skin. "Edward has been quite … taken with your scent, and during his week away convinced himself that he was in love with you."

The mention of that rude, stick-up-his-ass boy pissed me off, and I had a couple of actual semi-coherent thoughts. "Edward's a goddamn asshole. What the hell is his problem?"

Wait. He said Edward had been taken with my scent? In love with me? The douche nozzle had looked at me like I was a turd in the punchbowl.

Jasper's hand had burrowed beneath my jersey and was working its way under the hem of my turtleneck. When his cool, stony fingers touched my skin, it sent some kind of warm, quivery jolt right through me, and I grabbed at his biceps. Even through the silky feel of the sleeves of his turtleneck, his arms were as hard as the countertop behind me.

He felt like he was about the same temperature as the counter, too.

His nose was at my left ear, breathing deeply. "Yes, Edward is an adolescent, delusional asshole." He dipped his head, his soft, golden hair tickling my skin. As he licked my neck up to my ear, the cool feel of his tongue sent erotic shivers through me.

What a co-inky-dink. I'd wanted to do that very same thing to him. And to other places besides his neck, too.

Jasper's chilly lips were on the skin right below my ear. I shivered again and moaned and pushed against his very stiff dick. I wanted him so fucking bad. I wrapped my right leg around his. He was pushing against me so firmly I couldn't raise my leg up to get it around his, well … thighs … because he was so much taller than me.

He pushed my bra up, and his right hand was on my breast. His fingertips brushed over my instantly hard nipple, making my body arch against his. Goosebumps rose up over my body, and it felt so good, a lurid groan escaped me.

I was sure somebody outside the darkened classroom could have heard me.

"I'd wondered what you were hiding under these jerseys." As he kneaded my flesh, he made a rumbly, purring noise against my neck. "I warned Edward away from you, but he became a bit obsessive and kept trying to get into your bedroom at night. He kept Emmett and I quite busy."

Okay. I was distracted momentarily from Jasper's cool fingers and what they were doing. "He was what? The fucker what?" I practically screeched and tried to pull away from him, which was impossible because his left hand was tangled in my hair and spread across the center of my back.

"I never let him near your room. When I had things to take care of, Emmett was nearby. Edward came too close this morning and Emmett caught him. I'll finish dealing with him later."

"You've been watching my house? What the hell—"

Then my shirts and bra were shoved up to my neck, and his lips and tongue were licking and sucking my stiff nipples.

"Oh, fuck me hard and sideways," I exclaimed, gasping.

"I'm going to."

I didn't know how he did it, but my panties and jeans were down around my ankles, and I was sitting on the counter.

"Wait! Here? Uh, I … uh, somebody could come in. Uh, Mr. Banner could …" I tried to push against his solid chest, but the next instant both of my hands were behind me, crossed over each other at the small of my back, and his long fingers were wrapped around both of my wrists.

With my pants binding my ankles, there was no way I could run even if I could have pulled my hands from his hold.

I snapped my knees together, and he smirked at me again.

His black eyes roamed down my exposed body. "With the way you've been mouth-fucking those innocent pieces of fruit in the cafeteria for the last week-and-a-half, you can't be worried about being caught." His right hand dropped to his belt buckle and unfastened it. The next moment, his jeans were undone and he had his stiff dick in his hand. "We both have a little exhibitionist in us, I think."

I sucked in a breath. I couldn't help it. Even his dick was fucking beautiful. It was thick and pale and … and I was drooling again and starting to squirm on the counter.

I wanted it. I wanted him. I didn't give a shit if anybody came in as long as I had his dick inside me. I spread my knees apart, and his fingers were sliding through my wet folds. They were cold, but at the same time they sent a heat through me like I'd never felt before. His touch wrenched a groan right out of me, and I threw my head back.

His mouth was on my throat, sucking and nibbling as his fingers began lightly rubbing my clit. My breath was panting and whining out of me. He slid his lips up to my ear and nipped at the lobe.

"Did you have any ideas about what you might do with that peach I gave you?" His mouth brushed over my ear, and I could hear him inhaling deeply again.

He had me quivering all the way down to my toes. "I … I …" I could barely speak, I was breathing so hard. His fingers circling my clit were sending ripples of pleasure through me, and I ached I wanted him inside me so fucking bad. "Uh, I was … going to take a bite out of it … I, uh was going to smear it on your dick and suck off the juice."

He growled and it was the sexiest thing I'd ever heard, besides his deep voice and that other growly noise he made.

He made great noises.

His head pressed against mine. "We'll get to that at another time. Right now, I'm going to fuck you."

Hearing those words sent another shock of pleasure through me. "Please!" I couldn't fucking wait to feel that sweet dick buried inside me.

He pulled his fingers away, and ran the head of his dick up and down over me, getting it good and wet, while sending spasms of pleasure through me each time he glided over my clit. He slipped the head into me and stopped.

Oh, my fucking God, I'd never felt anything that good before. He was so hard, and he stretched and filled me, and he wasn't even all the way in yet. Just his skin in contact with mine made me feel a strange hum through every inch of me.

I wanted to wrap my legs around his hips and shove him into me, but my jeans were caught over my desert boots, and I couldn't push them off.

"Oh, God, Jasper, just fuck me!" I struggled to pull my hands free from his, but he wouldn't let go. I wanted to grab his arms, or feel his chest, or hang on to those wide shoulders, or … something. I didn't know what, but I wanted my hands on him. "Oh God, I want it. Just fuck me!"

His right hand held my head, his fingers tightened in my hair, and he lowered me toward the counter, suspending me just above it. "You're damn loud, little girl." He grinned at me, then his mouth was on mine, and his tongue was probing between my lips.

He tasted even better than he smelled. I'd never tasted anything like him before. He was sunshine, and leather, but who knew those things could have a flavor and could taste … so fucking sexy? I could finally identify that spice—it was cinnamon with a hint of allspice. I could just eat him! I wanted more. I sucked at his tongue greedily.

Pretty much, he had me bound and gagged, and I didn't even fucking care. Damn! I'd be proud if somebody walked into that classroom and saw him with his dick in me.

He licked over my lips, and held his head up to look into my eyes as he pushed into me. His eyes widened, and his nostrils flared. The muscles flexed in his jaw. "Oh, Bella," he ground out through his teeth. "Being inside you is so good. Better than … Just so fucking good." His eyes drifted closed, and he raised his golden head, the tendons in his neck straining. He let his breath out slowly. "Soooooo good."

And I knew he wasn't human. No penis could be that cold and hard, though his was warming up nicely.

I'd had a few, and his felt different from all of them. It was as hard as his fingers and his arms; his lips and face. Like his chest when I pushed against him.

Was that why he was holding my hands? So I couldn't touch him? Or to keep me from trying to escape?

Shit. I wasn't going anywhere.

He was holding me up off the counter. A regular human wouldn't have been able to do that for very long.

"You're not … a regular boy."

His eyes opened just a fraction, and he pulled back. "No." He brought his face close to mine again and quickly kissed my lips as he thrust into me again.

He was the Master of Distraction. The Master Distractor. I couldn't think about anything except his breath across my face and every inch of his thick cock caressing me on the inside.

As I groaned and whined, he watched my face and thrust into me again and again, keeping a slow and steady pace. I was so slick, I felt every ridge and vein of his dick and it was absolutely luscious.

He let go of my hands and his coasted up my back to my neck. He pulled his right hand from my hair and reached between us to press his thumb against my clit.

I gradually moved my hands to his arms and inched them up over the silky black sleeves covering his biceps and shoulders until I was grasping his face. I longed to touch his skin. He was… lovely. "You're so beautiful."

My breath caught as his thumb circled and rubbed, and then moved faster, and I knew I would come soon. It had been building up since I'd first laid eyes on him.

There was no way, but I swore I was getting wetter as I got closer and finally the pressure built up until I couldn't stand it anymore. My fingers clenched handfuls of his hair, and I pulled him to me, pressing his jaw to mine.

I didn't care if he wasn't human. I didn't care what he was. Nobody had made me feel as good as he did.

"Jasper," I gasped again. "I'm gonna come."

"I know," he whispered. "I want to feel you come. I want to feel you get even tighter on my dick and squeeze it as I fuck you."

Then the pressure exploded in a hot rush, and I sucked in a breath as the heat and exquisite pleasure surged through me; up my belly and down my legs, making them quiver and twitch with each pulse.

His mouth was over mine as I screamed and tried to thrust against him. I yanked and tugged at his hair, trying to pull him even closer to me.

At last, I collapsed over his arm, my hands fell away from his head, and my legs were trembling with the strain.

I slowly opened my eyes and saw he was watching me, the glittering ebony of his eyes softening to a liquid, shining black. Then he growled again, his jaw tensed, his eyes squeezed shut, and his forehead touched mine. His fingers held my neck stiffly and his right gripped my waist. Grunting, his thrusts shortened and quickened as he came deep inside me. At last, he shuddered and clutched me to him.

Damn. Jasper's O face was … it was so fucking hot.

Mission accomplished! And … I won the bet with Emmett!

Finally, he was still. He kissed my forehead and lifted me to his chest, his arms wrapping around me. "Ahhhhh, Bella. So, so good."

He nuzzled my neck and my cheek and pressed a quick kiss on my lips. His eyes studied mine.

I was as limp as an overcooked noodle, but I had put a few things together and thought I was closer to solving the mystery of the pretty, alien, rich kids. I had to say it. "You're not human."

"No." His heavy breaths were slowing.

"It's why everybody is afraid you."

"Yes. Everyone except you."

"It's why you're cold and hard and pale, and have gold or black eyes. It's why you smell So. Fucking. Good. And why you taste even better than you smell."

"Yes," he said quietly.

"And it's why that was the best fuck I ever had."

Just the corners of his full lips lifted, and I could see a hint of humor in his eyes.

"I know about the bet," he murmured.

My eyes and my mouth flew open. That goddamn Emmett swore he wouldn't tell! I was so going to have to give him a junk punch. But since he appeared to be as rock solid as Jasper, the only thing I would accomplish would be crushing every bone in my hand.

I snapped my mouth shut, squeezed my eyes closed, and my forehead thudded against Jasper's chest. It was a wonder he hadn't gotten pissed off and left me semi-naked under the teacher's desk or something.

"Sorry," I mumbled into his shirt.

I felt the vibrations of his low chuckle and he ran his fingers through my hair again.

I took that to mean he wasn't insulted or too angry. "So, uh, what is this … between us?"

"It's …" he began and sighed. His fingers combed gently through my hair and he cupped my face. "This means you're mine."

I blinked rapidly a few times. I didn't really know what to make of what he just said. Other than it kinda gave me another one of those warm, delicious, shivery feelings despite being held so tenderly to his cool body.

But there was that other question. "Uh, what are you?"

"I'll tell you on the way." His tongue swept across my lips.

We were going somewhere? "What?"

His still-black eyes narrowed slightly, and he said in an authoritative tone, "You and I are leaving Forks. Together."

Well, that escalated quickly. Hadn't seen that coming.

"Uh, can I grab the peach?"



O Jasper! My Jasper! ~ a bastardization of O Captain! My Captain! by Walt Whitman. Oddly enough, written in 1865.

"Mr. Sex-n-Legs" from Rosalie's Baby by Mortissues. A Jasper/Bella on Fanfiction dot net.

Special Guest Star: Avocado. Also appearing in I See Dead People by bloodyblond on Fanfiction dot net.