Hey peeps, it's been a few... years. Here I am again though, and here's a fic.

DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING

"What am I even here for?"

I'm not sure what to do.

He's in there, asleep. I can hear him sleeping. He's sick.

Soubi never gets sick.

He's in there, asleep, sick, and I can't do anything for him.

Ritsuka stood, walked a few steps, then sat back down on the couch.

He peered at the soft, comfortable pajama pants he still had on at 1:43pm. There was the image of a cat with a rainbow horn atop its head. Beneath it read "Hello my friends I'm a unicorn". It made him chuckle in the store, so Soubi bought it for him. As always Soubi did for him.

I'm twenty nine.

Jobless.

Useless.

Still crippled by depression.

Still want to hurt myself.

He didn't cause himself physical harm anymore, but for during occasional random bursts of fury and depression.

His legs were covered in unexplained bruises though. Soubi thought someone hurt him, and that he was lying about it.

It wasn't a lie though. Nobody touched him. One day he just noticed them. Examining the marks, Soubi had no doubt a person's fingers caused the previously greenish, now brown dots.

He still lived with his family, but his mom was less present than she used to be. Sure she still blamed him... for pretty much everything wrong with the world, but she didn't go near him. It wasn't avoidance so much as it seemed, in her shattered state, that he was something else. Not someone else, but some thing.

Either way, she didn't physically abuse him anymore. No one did, unless you counted the act of a sacrifice during spell battles.

Soubi still was hurt by the belief that something was happening to him, and he was lying about it.

That didn't change the fact that Ritsuka himself was unsure of the cause of the bruises. Nearly a week passed since they appeared, and still the only explanation, logical or otherwise, he came up with was that he pounded the tips of his fingers, and also knuckles into his legs, but didn't remember it. Soubi agreed that was possible, but still there remained the air of distrust, disloyalty.

He's sick somehow.

I'm sitting here, considering hurting myself, because everything seems so pointless.

I'm useless.

Why am I not at a job, or school? I can't even muster the capacity to get my useless self to make some money, or a reason to be around.

Soubi's money pays for food, Soubi cooks, Soubi lifts me when I'm down.

What am I even here for?

End

Reviews are appreciated.