"Take that back, Malfoy!"
"Why should I?! We all know your family love Mudbloods, that's why you hang out with Granger, isn't it?"
"Take that back now or I'll – "
"Or you'll what, Weasley?"
"I'll – I'll bloody hex you into the middle of next week, that's what I'll do!"
Severus Snape sighed before rising from his seat to attend to the latest commotion of the day outside his classroom door. The insufferable students were incapable of waiting in silence while he prepared for his next Defence Against the Dark Arts class, and he was already feeling the beginnings of a headache behind his eyes.
"I'd like to see you try, Weasley. Remind me what happened in our second year? I seem to recall you were spewing out slugs like there was no tomorrow!"
"Oh, don't you worry, I'll make sure to hit the right target this time!"
"Ron, I think maybe you'd better – "
"Oh look, Weasley, even Granger doesn't think you can do it!"
"I can too!"
"Go on, then! Go on! Or are you too scared to without your precious friend Potter to back you up?"
Snape's head was now pounding. He closed his eyes briefly before reaching his hand out to open the classroom door, cursing the day he ever thought it would be a good idea to actually teach the blasted children.
"I don't need Harry, I'm perfectly capable of doing stuff myself, thanks!"
"Well, go on, then! Or are you all talk? Should've known you weren't capable of any proper magic, being a Weasley!"
"Verba cantare!" Ron yelled, just as Snape pulled open the door. The next thing he felt was the cool blast of a spell hitting him in the chest which caused him to recoil slightly; he soon recovered and straightened himself up to survey the scene before him.
He saw Ronald Weasley staring at him, wand outstretched and pointing right at him, a look of complete shock on his face. He was also aware of Draco Malfoy standing next to him; the boy had doubtlessly been standing against the classroom door until the jinx was cast and then had dodged sideways, leaving Snape to face the full force of it. He was unsure, however, as to what the actual effect had been on him. He felt no different. Cautiously checking himself over, he heard Malfoy ask Ron the same question that was on his mind.
"What was that spell, Weasley? I've not heard that before. Are you resorting to making them up now?" he said with a slight sneer in his voice. Snape was relieved to hear this meant he most likely looked no different; he was not up to once again being a figure of ridicule following the events with Longbottom and the Boggart a few years back.
"Dunno." Ron shrugged. "It's one of Fred and George's, I just remember reading it somewhere. It can't be that bad, can it?" He gulped and looked up at Snape, his face now completely white.
Snape felt now was time to gain back some control of the situation and decided to ignore Hermione Granger, who was stood behind Ron with a look of horror on her face. He opened his mouth to berate Ron and order the class inside.
"No spells should be cast in the corridor,
That's twenty points from Gryffindor,
Now everyone enter in silence,
I'm only going to tell you once."
Snape snapped his mouth shut, horrified. Where on earth had that come from? He could still feel Hermione's gaze on him despite his concerted efforts to block her from his vision, and eventually turned to look at her, settling for raising an eyebrow in question as he did not trust himself to attempt to speak again.
"Um, Professor?" Hermione ventured. When Snape did not make any effort to prevent her from speaking, she continued. "I think I might, er, I might know what that does."
Snape glared at her but refrained from bursting into sarcasm, worried that he might burst into song again instead. He simply nodded at her to continue.
"From the sounds of the incantation itself, I think it's something to do with words and song. Specifically, it means something the lines of 'sing your words'' or 'sing your speech'," she said, her voice stronger now that she was on the familiar ground of imparting information.
"Are you saying," croaked Ron, "that I've just made Snape sing?!" He was now as white as the Bloody Baron and looked as though his world was about to come to a grisly, painful end.
"That's Professor Snape to you,
Unless you'd like detention too."
Blast it, he should have let that one go.
He was aware of the looks from the rest of the class turning from outright fear to – was that amusement? Snape groaned inwardly. This was going to be the Boggart all over again, he knew it.
Resolving to not even think about speaking again, he wrenched the classroom door open and pointed sharply inside whilst turning his glare to encompass the rest of the students, adding a snarl in for good measure. This seemed to have the desired effect and, as the students quietly filed in, he strode to the blackboard at the front of the room and began to write down instructions. He ensured that the sixth years would have more than enough work to keep them busy for the duration of the class and added a few written threats in for good measure, before once again exiting the classroom, his long robes billowing behind him as he made his way towards the one person he felt might respect the little bit of dignity he had left.