Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the story idea and only some of the witty remarks. I own so little; so please don't steal.
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"Kise-kun, I'm going to break up with Kagami."
A plane full of restless individuals on route to Altai, Mongolia were currently five minutes behind schedule on account of their absent pilot, and were going to be five more minutes later had Kise actually tripped over the five-year-old in his path in his surprise, clutching a sleek, silver cell phone to his ear. "No, don't do that," he said, giving no indication he had almost trampled a toddler, nodding in apology and pulling his suitcase along. "Don't do that, don't do that."
"Why not? I think I need to; I think it's time."
"No," Kise whined, shirt wrinkled, tie askew, hair a mess. Frantic, rushing people were background noise at the Tokyo airport, but he was spared a look because he was particularly flustered and dressed in his pilot uniform - and damn good-looking to boot, but he had bigger fish to fry at the moment - and - "Why would you think this is the only choice? How did he make you mad this time?"
"Nothing. It's just a feeling." Though, really, Kise had never once thought it had been a result of anything Kagami had done; certainly Kuroko may have threatened Kagami himself with such an ultimatum before but never would he have called Kise about it if it had not been a big deal. "I'm planning on calling him later to meet with me and then we'll break it off."
"Don't do that," Kise parroted. He heard Kuroko sigh audibly, a clear indication he was grating on a last nerve. "Listen, listen, hasn't he been good to you? I know I've said a lot of things but you know, I'm just giving Kagamicchi a hard time, but he's such a good boyfriend to you, this is a hasty decision..."
"I've already prepared myself, Kise-kun, and I don't need you to try to talk me out of it."
"It's what friends and roommates are for, right?" Kise cried, giving a winning smile that made him look slightly maniacal as he rounded and nearly skidded past the gate. The gate attendant was looking at her wristwatch pointedly. He grinned at her even wider and tried to enter the gate but she thrust her arm out, miming a phone with her other hand. "Listen, Kurokocchi, I really can't talk right now, I'm, I mean, I've got to board my flight, I'm late, but don't do anything rash before talking it over with me! Okay?"
"Have a safe flight, Kise-kun," Kuroko said in a monotone before hanging up.
"I'm sorry," Kise said to the gate attendant.
"You have more than just me to apologize to," she said, looking displeased. "Get on board, captain."
The clock whispered twelve-eighteen in the morning when Kise unlocked his apartment with the gentlest of clicks and attempted to teleport soundlessly into the foyer but the light in the kitchen was on and Kuroko was sitting at the table on his computer, looking no different than he did when Kise left two weeks ago.
"I didn't know you'd still be awake," Kise said, turning on the the light at the door and gracefully unlacing his shoes one at a time. The clattering of Kuroko's keyboard was drowned out by the rumble of his suitcase's wheels down the hall toward the kitchen and the rest of the apartment.
"I had a lot on my mind," Kuroko said, a pair of slick tortoiseshell glasses balanced artfully on the bridge of his nose. He rarely brought out his reading glasses unless he was thinking too hard to focus on the material he was reading. Kise had struggled to get him to buy something more quirky but Kuroko had scowled at that. "I'm planning a field trip for my class in two weeks and there's just some logistics I have to pound out, and I also need to write up a permission form." He sighed and squeezed the space between his eyebrows. "Parents are very protective of their little ones."
"I'm sure you had a lot on your mind."
Kuroko gave him a disinterested look.
"I saw your relationship change on Facebook!" Kuroko turned back to his computer. "I thought you said you would wait until we talked about it." He was talking to a wall; Kuroko merely sniffed and Kise decided to switch tactics. "How did he take it?"
It seemed that Kuroko was not willing to give him his satisfaction, but just as Kise resigned himself to living the rest of his life without such information and began making himself some tea for bed: "He resisted at first, as I expected, but once I laid out my reasoning and logic, he agreed. It was a peaceful breakup."
"What was your reasoning?" Kise asked as he poured generous heaps of jasmine white tea leaves into the two mugs. Kuroko always hated it when he made tea because he preferred a watered-down, gentler taste but Kise figured he was justified in making the tea stronger. Kuroko did not touch the steaming mug Kise placed before him.
"Sometimes people can break up without making it dramatic," Kuroko said finally, finishing his typing with an anticlimactic stroke. He looked up at Kise with unaffected eyes. "It doesn't have to be tears and hurt feelings."
Kise took a sip and burned his tongue before putting his mug down and crossing over to envelope Kuroko in a suffocating hug. "I missed you in Russia, Kurokocchi."
"I would ask you about Russia, but you have a tendency to talk into morning and you should get some sleep."
"Are things okay with him?"
If possible, Kuroko became even more rigid in his arms. "Why do you keep talking about Kagami? Our breakup has nothing to do with you and your friendship with him was not dependant on our relationship. I already told you we broke off fairly cleanly."
"Yes, yes, I'm sorry."
"Go to bed. You've been flying for hours." He dodged the kiss Kise attempted to place on his cheek and watched as the blonde gathered his things from the foyer and set off to his room. "The apartment was quieter without you."
"Oh, I'm so touched!"
It had barely crossed Kise's mind to wrestle details about the momentous breakup from the ex that he was surprised when Kagami called him three days later when he was picking up a few things from the grocery store to stock up the fridge. He had almost forgotten when he answered and Kagami said, "How's Kuroko?"
"That's cruel of you, Kagamicchi. I'm gone for weeks and the first thing out of your mouth isn't asking me how I am."
"Oh. Sorry. I mean, how was Russia?"
"But I understand, I guess. If I had been dating someone for three years, I guess I'd ask about them too, in your circumstance." He balanced the phone on his shoulder as he checked the expiration date for the milk. Kagami hesitated on the line.
"I was just wondering, that's all," he said, sounding ashamed even through the phone.
"He's alright. You know Kurokocchi; he doesn't say anything even if he isn't."
There was another pause. "He hasn't said anything about me?"
"Hmm," Kise said, deliberately. He put the milk back and chose another carton. "Russia was nice. The girls there are very pretty."
"Can we," Kagami asked, "have lunch together? Today? Or soon?"
"Not today," Kise said. "But I can on Thursday, if you're free. And you're not allowed to talk about Kuroko for more than half the time."
"Thursday at noon. I can't promise, but I'll try."
Note: the beginning of the esteemed long fic...sos help