Title: Quick Pick Me Up (1/1)
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I wished I owned the two Xanders' from "The Replacement" though. Buffy and friends are owned by Joss, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, The WB, and whoever else has rights to the show.
Summary: It's short, and it's not about anything.
Spoilers: I'm not good with eppy titles, but it's pretty much just some stuff I borrowed from season 5.
Distribution: My fic is your fic. Just let me know.
Feedback: Definitely!! Tell me if it sucked or if you liked it. Whatever. Just write back!
Buffy: You don't have to do this, you know.
Xander: Yeah, I do. Its part of the friend package. You know, one friend is depressed, other friend creates wacky fun time scenario so that aforementioned friend feels better.
Buffy raises her eyebrows and glances at Xander.
Buffy: That sentence confused me.
Xander: *under his breath* Not surprising.
Buffy: What was that?
Buffy punches his arm semi-hard.
Buffy: *smiling* Your inability to make sense has nothing to do with my intelligence.
Xander: *smiling back* You're right. You were lacking intelligence WAY before I became non-sensible.
Buffy: HA HA. You're supposed to be making me feel better, not insulting me. Willow doesn't insult me, I should get her over here.
Xander: *teases* Willow does it in her head, I'm more open with my thoughts. Plus, why is everything always about you, I need to get my kicks to.
Buffy glared at him menacingly and he smiled back.
Buffy: You should think of something for us to do. I'm bored. Willow never makes me bored.
Xander: *leering* If you're so obsessed with Willow we could call her over. I can think of plenty of things for the three of us to do that would end boredom.
Buffy: You're sick.
Xander: Fine, fine. I have lots of two people ideas too. For instance, you could go down…
Buffy moves away from him and stares with wide eyes.
Buffy: I'm not liking where this is heading.
Xander: (continues) …go downstairs and fix me a sandwich, Gutterface, or you get up and turn on the TV, or you could go pick up my dry cleaning, or…
Buffy: Shut up.
Xander: I was just getting to the good one. We could go back to my place and you could clean…
Buffy: I'm bored. Still.
Xander: Maybe that has something to do with your being boring.
Buffy: Again with the insults. I just got dumped, you have to be nice and rebuild my faith in mankind again.
Xander: Ok, Ok. Do you wanna go to the Bronze?
Buffy: It's 4:00 in the afternoon.
Xander: Expresso Pump?
Xander: The Beach?
Buffy: The movie?
Xander: Then the regular one.
Buffy: Uh uh.
Xander: We could do a little making out.
Buffy just looked at him.
Xander: It was worth a shot.
Buffy: *sarcastically* I'm glad my vulnerability give you a happy.
Xander: We could just keep lying here and starring at the ceiling.
Buffy: Now your talkin'.
[20 minutes later]
Xander: You must have a mirror in your pocket cuz I can see myself in your pants.
Xander: I'm bored. You stopped talking, so we're playing a game.
Xander: Pick-up lines. I went first, so it's your turn.
Buffy: Did you make this up?
Xander: Yep. Go. And you haveta make it snappy if you plan of bedding me. I'm not an easy lay.
Buffy: Well it wasn't that hard, you're already in my bed.
Xander: Dammit, you're already halfway there. Stop trying to change the subject, it's your turn.
Buffy: Alright, alright. Ummmm… If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together.
Xander: *smiling* Are those space pants cuz your ass is out of this world.
Buffy: *blushing* If I told you you had a nice body would you hold it against me.
Xander: That shirt is very becoming on you, but then again, if I were on you I'd be coming too.
Buffy: *turns brighter red* Yours are perverted.
Xander: It's your turn and times awaistin'.
Buffy: You're enjoying this aren't you?
Grinning Xander taps his watch.
Xander: I should mention the 30-second rule.
Buffy: There's no rule! You just made that up!
Xander: It's my game. If you take longer then 30 seconds you have to lose an article of clothing.
Buffy: I'm not playing anymore.
Xander: the game is binding, you can't quit.
Xander: … and look at that. 30 seconds up. Lose something.
Buffy smirks and takes of her socks
Xander: Oh baby, take it off!
Buffy elbows him lightly in the ribs
Buffy: I got one. If your name was Pogo, I'd jump your stick.
Xander: I seem to have lost my phone number, can I borrow yours.
Buffy: I've got the F, the C, and the K, now all I need is U.
Xander: My names not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bedrock.
Buffy: *laughing* If you were a hunter I'd take you back to my cabin and let you stuff a beaver.
Xander: Buffy!!! Now who's the perv.
Buffy: No come back? Uh oh, take something off.
Xander takes off his Hawaiian over shirt and lays back down.
Xander: *mutters* stupid rule.
Buffy smirks at him.
Xander: That's a nice outfit, but it would look better in a ball on my bedroom floor.
Buffy: That's a nice pair of pants. Can I talk you out of them?
Both are cracking up
Xander: I like every muscle in your body, especially mine.
Xander: That's not gonna get me. Now it's time to see some skin!
Buffy pulls one of the pillows from behind her and holds it in front of herself while she takes off her tee shirt and avoids Xander's eyes.
Xander: I thank God that you don't know the beauty of multiple layers.
Buffy rolls her eyes and continues while laying back down
Buffy: What's your name? Or shall I call you mine.
Xander: *bouncing up and down a little* This mattress is a little hard. I could help you break it in.
Buffy: I don't know what you think of me, but I hope it's X-rated.
Xander: Lets have breakfast tomorrow; shall I call you of nudge you?
Buffy: *laughing* Do you believe in love at first sight or shall I walk by again?
Xander doesn't respond, but has his silence interrupted by his cell phone ringing.
Xander: *answering the phone* Hello.
Anya: Hey baby.
Xander: *looks towards Buffy, then sits up* Hey you. What are you up to?
Anya: Nothing much. Are you done being Buffy's friend yet because I don't trust her with you. Plus I'm bored, I want you to come home, and bring food and a movie.
Xander: can do. See you in a bit.
Anya: I love you.
Xander: I love you too. Bye.
Xander clicks off the phone and turns back to Buffy who had put on his over-shirt and was laying with her eyes closed.
Xander: I gotta go.
Xander stands up.
Buffy: *somewhat sadly* Yeah. Call me when you get home, so I won't worry.
Xander: *offers a lopsided grin* Will do.
He walks to the door.
Buffy: Thanks for coming over.
Xander walks back over to Buffy and pulls her into a bear hug.
Xander: Anytime Buff.
They are still hugging.
Buffy: I'll see you tomorrow.
Xander: Yep. Everyday till you feel better.
He lets her go.
Xander: *grins* or I get tired of you.
Buffy: Bye Xander.
Xander walks to the door again and opens it.
Xander: Bye Buffy.
Xander walks out of the room and shuts the door behind him. Buffy watches from her window as he walks outside and to his car.