AN: Right. This, my awesome minions or whatever you are reading this, is my Camp NaNoWriMo novel. The target was 30,000 words in a month and I made it, and the novel is nowhere near finished. So, updates will be fast as the chapters will be very, very short. Seriously. There are a couple that are only like, two paragraphs. But I hope you enjoy it!

Please note: The canon events have been changed. And all of this is stretching the truth of all possible Tony headcanons I include in a lot of things.

Disclaimer: I don't own Tony Stark or Iron Man or any other owned thing that is in this.

When Tony Stark sat down to write a novel about himself, it was shit because I wasn't writing in first person.

Yeah, if I write in third person this will be crap.

Welcome to my introduction. Bruce is looking over my shoulder, so he should stop reading this right now.

He says I shouldn't swear in my autobiography. Well, fuck him. I can swear as much as I like.

Bruce says I'm being childish. But I think that that's bullshit, I've grown up through the whole Iron Man thing.

Bruce says I'm even more childish now. Caused by psychological trauma or some crap like that.

Hmm. It's just occurred to me that this novel will reveal how crazy I really am. No one will want me around once people have read it. Maybe I should start planning my life as a recluse. I'll need alcohol, lots of computers and Bruce. Malibu or Stark Tower?

I'm being silly, aren't I?

Well, I really don't care. This is my novel and I'm going to write what I like.

This'll probably just end up as some stupid monologue that no one in their right mind would read but you'll all read it anyway because you all love me or something.

I hate you all. All those people who just love me because I saved your asses. None of you love me. The only person who'll read this because they love the person I really am is Bruce.

I really shouldn't proclaim my hate to the people of get me all the money I have.


I'm sorry.

You're going to read this and find out so many things about the person I am. And you'll hate me after you're finished, I promise.