Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans
The past few days, on the BBrae tag on tumblr, there have been some issues brought to light about character bashing. And thusly, I would like to say that there isn't a single character in Teen Titans that I don't like except Control Freak who honestly just creeps me out a little. I even like Slade, in his own way.
So, I've set out to try my best at writing a BBrae fic that doesn't hate on anyone or any ship and the characters don't bitch at each other or anything.
Hopefully, this works out.
Raven never quite understood why she had become the group's counselor. Maybe it was because she was logical, because she was upfront, because she was blunt. But she would never completely comprehend why Robin, Starfire, Cyborg, Beastboy, and at one time, Terra had come to her for advice. She was almost always battling her own feelings and dealing with others seemed like the furthest thing from helpful.
But they took refuge in her, consulted her when their heads were troubled, and she told them how it was and, somehow, they left feeling better. This confused her, because half the time, things she said stung. Raven wasn't exactly a bundle of mercy.
"I'm just really concerned about the amount of gang outbreaks. It just doesn't seem to be coming together and I'm a little stressed out about asking Batman for help." Robin had come to her once.
"Why be stressed? You've always managed to crack down on things if you put your head in the game. Besides, Batman would be in the same spot you are. You were taught everything you know by him, right?"
And Robin left with confidence in himself and soon, the amount of gang outbreaks decreased tremendously.
"I just start to think of how things used to be and I wonder if I'm going to be able to be happy; if anyone wants me when I'm . . . like this." Cyborg had sighed sadly, true worry in his tired face. He had been thinking about a few old girlfriends he had had when he was human and had gotten down again.
"Cyborg, nothing about you has changed. From what I can read, you are still the same person with the same attractions as before. If anyone dislikes you because of your outer appearance, then you needn't worry; they are not worth your time. Obviously." And Cyborg had left with renewed interest in getting 'back in the game' as he referred to it.
"I fear that I have been stricken with the sickness of homes." Starfire mumbled with despair, "It has been a cycle since my last departure and I have been missing my people and home greatly."
"Then . . . go home?" Raven had said, needing not to go further. Starfire had leapt up, a bright grin on her face as she cried out, "I shall go home! I shall go home right away! Oh, how thankful I am to you, friend Raven! I only wish you could go with me—,"
"No thanks." Raven said steadily, but not harshly. "I'd rather stay on a planet with readable books."
"Raven," She recalled how Terra had said one day before the worst had happened, "Raven, I've been feelin' kinda guilty about all this stuff; you guys letting me into your home and whatever. Like, I wish I could repay you but I don't really have anything to—,"
"Don't." Raven began, and Terra feared for a moment that she was upset with her. But Raven had changed after they had saved the Tower and she smiled slightly, saying gently, "You don't have to give us anything material in return. You're loyalty to us is all you need to repay us in."
"Rae," Came the quiet knock on her door today. She sighed, knowing the drill that had begun to float over. It was Saturday and she thought that everyone had left to go to the movies. Or, at least, that had been the plan an hour ago. Raven had carefully detached herself from having to go, because she needed to meditate. But now, she had finished and was reading in what she thought was an empty Titan's Tower.
Terra had been . . . gone . . . for about two years now. Beastboy's knock on the door was weak and she halted just before it, her hand hesitating in its motion to move it. "Yes?" She said cautiously, because Beastboy had only four moods.
Happy and altogether blissful in ignorance.
Rarely serious when in battle mode.
Angry and when his animalistic side is tempted.
And uselessly flirtatious.
This was a sad 'Rae' that he had called out, and Raven wasn't sure she was altogether ready to deal with a new emotion from the boy-in-puberty.
"Rae," He said again, "Can we talk? Everyone left a while ago and the game system is busy downloading something and I've seen all my movies and I don't feel like working out and there isn't anything to do and—,"
She opened the door with a long sigh of anguish.
"—and I'm sad." The boy before her really wasn't a boy anymore. He had recently undergone puberty and was benefiting from it greatly. His short green hair had grown shaggy, which he claimed looked more animal-like. He was as tall as Starfire now and his shoulders were broader. His body grew too and they had to design him a new outfit, or, at least, a more spacious one. He wasn't muscular, persay, not as muscular as Robin or Cyborg, but he wasn't scrawny anymore. She, too, had changed. Though she couldn't see it herself, she had lost the final indications of girlhood. Her hair was long, to her shoulder blades, at least, and her face was framed until it was a lovely heart shape. Her breasts were larger and her hips were wider and honestly, she, too, needed a new size of suit.
"Why are you sad?" She asked solemnly, directly. Though Beastboy had changed on the outside, he had not so much on the inside. Upon the question, he squirmed and fidgeted and avoided it altogether.
"Can I come in and hang out with you for a while, Rae?" He asked, almost pleaded.
"No. Not unless you need me for something." Raven immediately regretted her choice of words, because Beastboy, at his new age, had grown a touch more sensual. His mouth curved upward, exposing sharper teeth than ever before, and his boyish teasing began.
"Rae, it's better not even to ask me that." He chuckled lightly, and she realized how deep his voice had gotten. She had heard it before, but with puberty's disastrous effects, it had been crackly for the last few months or so.
"Come in." She reluctantly stepped aside, trying to remember where she was in her book and debating inwardly if she really wanted to stop in such a good part. But, still, Beastboy was just like any other Titan. And, she thought, if I can't deal and handle my own emotions, I can help my friend's with theirs.
"Thanks Rae!" He grinned happily. Gar morphed instantly, turning into a puppy that charged headlong into Raven's dark room. "Beastboy!" She groaned, "If you aren't potty trained-,"
He morphed back and was suddenly sitting on her bed, laughing joyfully. "Potty trained! That's funny Raven! You're funny!"
She raised an eyebrow and floated over. Seating herself on the opposite side, as far away from him as possibly, she grabbed her book and pushed it under a pillow. He watched her curiously, then glanced at her when she asked, "So, what brings you to my room—,"
Again, he was avoiding his problem and was seeking distraction. Morphing into a snake, he slithered swiftly across the covers. Though Raven admired dark and creepy things, she still gasped and moved her hand away from the viper, immediately feeling idiotic because it was Beastboy.
"What's this?" He said, morphing into himself again. Suddenly, his thigh was pressed against hers and she almost fell off the bed, had he not placed a surprisingly strong arm about her waist and waved the book in her face. "A diary or something?"
"Such a fool." She scowled, reaching for it. But Beastboy was taller, as he had been for a while now, and his long arms held it over her reach. She couldn't float up to it, for his arm was strong and warm and she secretly didn't want to leave such a welcoming embrace.
"It's only a book." She told him as he flipped through it.
"Is it good?" He asked, though his tone held little interest in pages and words. She smiled in sudden fondness that he was humoring her, but just as quickly, she retorted, "You'd know if you ever read anything."
He feigned hurt and crawled back on her bed, leaving with his warmth. Suddenly chilled, she crossed her legs and lifted herself off the sheets, hovering patiently, watching him closely. Obviously, something was bothering Gar and he just didn't want to spit it out, typically. The only way to really get him to say what was on his mind was to get him angry . . .
. . . or to be Terra.
She took a deep breath at this last thought. Though the blonde girl had betrayed them, hurt them, and tricked them, Raven had once considered her a friend. And for her last good deed, Terra would always be a friend in her heart. The memory of a girl who understood and attracted the green boy beside her made her slightly jealous at heart. But Terra was no more than a memory, and memories were often painful. Raven reminded herself that she had no hard feelings towards Terra any longer. What was done was done and Terra had proven herself an ally in the end, which was all Raven needed. Besides, she kept Beastboy out of her hair for her short time period she was with them and that's all that mattered.
Actually, yeah, that was all that mattered . . . that for a brief time, Beastboy had stopped trying to make Raven laugh, to get Raven's attention and moved on to Terra. At first, Raven's contempt for the earth wielder was for her sudden advantage in controlling her power, but soon, Raven realized that she almost missed Beastboy's constant peppering of stupid jokes and his attempts to make her smile. But again, Terra would not be disdained any longer because what Raven had felt was the sadness of losing a ray of light that was Beastboy for just a small interval of time. The dislike for Terra had been the feelings of a young teenage girl who couldn't control her emotions properly and now, Raven saw clearly that when Terra was gone, that ray of light would never shine as brightly again.
"Rae?" The voice called from outside of train of thought. Beastboy was flipping to what looked like the fifth page of the book. "Did you hear me? I said I kinda like it so far."
A pity rose in her system and she smiled warmly at him for the first time in a long time. This threw Gar so off track that his mouth fell open and he earned himself a massive paper-cut, but he beamed at her so happily that the pain was easily ignored. "Good," She said simply, "You can borrow it if you want, but if you rip any of the pages or spill anything, you buy me a new one."
"Uh," He said, 70% sure he wanted to borrow it and 90% sure he would end up ruining it, "Where can I get a new one if I do?"
"The underworld." She said, as though she was saying 'the library'.
For a second, he blinked at her, then he burst into laughter and she smiled quietly, her own way of laughing. Beastboy soon felt very glad at his last ditch decision to visit Raven. Sure, she was almost always grumpy and every time he tried to interact with her, she would shoot him down, but Rae had changed from what she used to be.
She was more open with everyone now, and her time was spent in the rec room nowadays instead of cooped up in her own room. Occasionally, she would sit on the roof of the tower and Gar would fly about as a variety of birds until she wanted to talk, then he would swoop down so fast that she almost got whip-flash.
"Are you okay now, Gar?" She said, and with the sound of his name, he blushed.
"Yea, a lot better." He assured her, but he himself was not completely certain.
"What was troubling you?" She said, completely in therapist mode now, "Anything concerning Terra?" Unlike the other Titans, Raven wasn't afraid of saying the rock wielder's name around Beastboy. He appreciated that from her, because he liked it when people acknowledged she actually had existed.
"Nah, nothing like that." He waved a hand and sat the book down on the bed. "I've just been having some weird emotions lately. Like, you know when girls have that certain monthly thing they go through?" He gave her this awkward look, "Well, I have all the symptoms of that! Oh, God, no, I mean, not the ew thing but the mood-swings and stuff—," He was rambling now, his cheeks tented darkly.
She smirked crookedly. "Do you have the cramps too?"
He threw his arms up and groaned. "No! Just, like, gah, Raven, I didn't expect you to understand! No one could understand!" He shouted, throwing himself out of the bed. The book clattered to the ground, landing on pages and wrinkling them. She stared at him wide-eyed, dropping from her floating position and onto the bed.
"Beastbo-," but before he reached the door, he spun around and his face was apologetic. Quickly, he morphed to a wolf and tiptoed over, picking the book up by its spine and walking over to set it in her lap. She could have made a comment on the drool that dripped down the cover, but she felt that wouldn't be a good idea. He changed back and his eyes were full of dog-with-his-tail-between-his-legs. She would have also commented on how his head was almost in her lap as well and how he looked oh so sad and pitiful, but he spoke first.
"Rae, see what I mean? I don't know what's going on with me. It can't be puberty, can it?"
"Actually, I think it can be. But, not so much puberty itself . . . just something that . . . comes with puberty." She said, her voice tense and her eyes adverting his. She knew what was wrong with him and she knew he needed her help, but saying it was not her division.
"Really?" He asked, hope in his eyes. If he still had that tail, it would be wagging. His pointed ears perked up and he smiled at her, oozing with relief.
"Yea, um," She said, then she muttered under her breath, "This is going to be awkward but," His awaiting eyes ushered her to say with a long sigh, "You're just aroused Beastboy."
For a good five seconds, he looked like a child who had just learned the new word 'sex'. Then, his face twisted in embarrassment and horror and he backpedaled, landing on his bottom on her carpeted floor. "NO WAY!" He cried, exasperated, "I can't be! No! That's not me! I'm not a pervert or anything!"
"Sorry for asking," She mumbled, "But have you ever . . . had anyone before?" His face turned even darker and his eyes begged her to stop all the humiliating questions. She threw her legs over the side of the bed and waited patiently for him to answer.
"Wha—? No! Raven, I've never even kissed anyone before! How can . . .?" But even now, he could feel it deep down. Now that it was put into words, he knew that it was true and that he was sexually frustrated. But he never had ever felt that way before!
"It's only natural, Beastboy." She said calmly, her own embarrassment subsiding. "You just need to let that out on something. Have you ever tried ma-,"
"DON'T SAY THE WORD." He cried and she swore his cheeks would burst with color. "Please don't say it! It's too much!"
"Well, then get a girlfriend." She advised.
"But," He said, and now she knew that Terra was the reason for his sadness. "I can't just get a girlfriend."
"Yes you can, Garfield. Just go out and there and . . . I don't know, romantic things."
"Raven," He started. "You know how I am. The only girl in my life that's ever been attracted to me was Terra." His eyes burned with memories.
"That's not true, Gar." She said with such certainty that they both stared at each other blankly for a good five minutes. "Well, it's not." She concluded, ignoring her obvious statement.
"Rae," He said softly, "You wanna go on a date sometime?"
Her eyes flashed up to him and irritation was on her face, "Don't joke around Beastboy, it's not funny."
"Why do you think that because I asked you out, I'm teasing you?" He chuckled, but there was seriousness in his tone. "Really, though, we know each other good enough to be able to try this out and it not ruin our friendship. Just a date. And then maybe sex afterwords I dunno."
This last bit was joking, but her mind was still processing the first few words. "I-," She began. "I don't know about that." She had never cared for anyone except for the whole book-dragon-scenario and maybe Aqualad a little. But Gar was, like he said, a good enough friend that she could try and go right back to friendship if they needed to. Besides, she was curious about her emotions and wanted to know more about them, so if Beastboy could help her with that . . . "One date." She stated and his whole face lifted up and he leaned in to hug her, but she placed a hand out. "No sex though."
He shrugged in agreement and went in for the hug that was received awkwardly yet tenderly. She smiled, though he couldn't see it, and when the sound of Starfire, home from the movies, came at the door saying, "RAVEN BE JOYOUS! THE MOVIE OF DARK KNIGHTS WAS MOST INTRIGUING AND I HAVE COME TO RELATE EVERY DETAIL TO YOU SO YOU, TOO, CAN LIVE THE EXCITEMENT!"
Beastboy gave her a sympathetic look and she frowned at him. "You know what, how about we go on that date now so . . ."
"Gotcha." He grinned, all too happy to take her up on her offer.
So how'd that go down?
Feels like a rushed ending, I know, but it's 2:00 am where I am and I really don't want to stay up later. :I sooooo