Stiles is pretty sure he's going insane. And so he does what he always does when he feels like that — he calls Scott. One of the many benefits of your best friend being a werewolf is that they take as little time as possible to get to your house, which is always comforting. One of the downsides is that Stiles tends to get mixed up in things that are extremely hard to get out of — and things that he's not even sure he wants to get out of. Sometimes that means being known as an enemy by an Alpha pack, but sometimes it's things like the fact that he's sleeping with Derek Hale and he has feelings for him but doesn't know whether Derek feels the same. It bugs him that he doesn't know what it means. Part of him is yelling "who cares what it means, he's Derek Hale!" but Stiles also has a part that wants to figure out the meaning of it. That's what he tells himself, anyway, but really it's the fact that Stiles wants more than Derek ever will. And that really, really sucks. Which is where Scott comes in.
It's probably not the best idea to ask Scott over when Stiles needs a bit of help with figuring things out, he thinks, but regardless of that, Scott's his best friend and it always helps to have his opinion on things. It's also vastly entertaining slipping details of his sex life into the conversation to see just how grossed out Scott can get.
Five minutes and fifty eight seconds after Stiles hangs up on Scott, his bedroom door swings open and Scott flops himself down next to Stiles on the bed.
"Is this a Derek thing?" Scott asks, sighing slightly.
"Your skills of observation are rivalled by none." Stiles replies dryly. He pauses for a moment. "I don't know what I want to do with Derek."
"Other than fuck him?" Scott asks.
"More like have him fuck me, but yeah. I don't know if I can do it anymore."
"Please don't use the word 'do' right now." Scott says.
"I hate you." Stiles says, not really putting much energy behind it at all.
"Why don't you want to..." Scott pauses. "um, do it, anymore."
"Because I'm an idiot." Stiles begins. "And I don't know if I can do this if all he wants is sex and I want more."
A silence fills the room for a moment. Stiles looks at his knees. He's almost embarrassed, but this is Scott; he knows everything about Stiles. It can kind of suck for the both of them that they tell each other everything sometimes (namely when one of them divulges too much about their sex life) but neither of them would change it for the world.
"And you don't know what to do?" Scott asks.
Stiles nods in response, turning to look at Scott, as though expecting some wisdom to explode from his friend that will suddenly solve everything. However, such wisdom doesn't come out, but something else entirely does.
"You need to make a list!" Scott tells him. Noting Stiles' confused look, he continues. "Pros and cons. Of sleeping with Derek."
"Oh, how very 'Ross and Rachel'." Stiles remarks.
Scott stares at him for a moment but carries on. "Come on. It'll work."
"What if he finds it? I don't want to mess this up." Seeing Scott's confused look, he continues, "I mean, I don't know if I want to mess this up. I want to keep my options open though because if I mess it up and it turns out I don't want to mess it up then I'm gonna be really pissed at you for making me mess it up."
Scott stares at him incredulously. "You're insane. He won't find the list."
Stiles lets Scott drag him over to his computer and seat him on the computer chair. Following his lead, Stiles opens up a Word document and stares at it blankly for a moment. Stiles begins typing, but stops abruptly after writing 'Pros and Cons'
"What am I titling this as?" he asks Scott, turning to see him leaning over his shoulder.
"Your choice." Scott tells him, leaning over his friend's shoulder to see what he types.
Tentatively, Stiles types 'of', before pausing and sighing. "Am I going with 'fucking', 'sleeping with' or 'having sex with'?"
"Sleeping with is less explicit." Scott puts across.
Stiles turns around and stares at him. "Yeah, that'll come in handy when all the five year olds I know are reading it."
Nevertheless, he finishes typing and pushes his computer chair back — and he swears blind if it weren't for the fact that Scott had werewolf reflexes his friend would be on the floor — to look at the screen.
'Pros & Cons Of Sleeping With Derek Hale'
"Starting with Pros?" Scott asks. Seeing Stiles nods, he continues speaking. "Come on then: there's gotta be some reason you're fucking the guy."
"Again, he's fucking me." Stiles corrects him. "But right now I am imagining Derek as a power bottom."
Scott elbows him sharply in the ribs, ignoring Stiles' wince. "We've been through this. Too much information?"
"Like you don't let Allison dominate you." Stiles scoffs. He doesn't need to turn around to see that Scott's looking extremely uncomfortable.
"I'm leaving." Scott says, getting up as if to go — even though both of them know it's just an act.
"Come on!" Stiles yells. "I need your wonderful wolfy advice and shit." he trails off.
"Fine." Scott tells him. "But we're not talking about our sex lives."
"That's kind of why you're here right now..." Stiles tells him. "To help me with my sex life?" Seeing Scott's look he jumps from the chair. "Not like that."
Scott joins him back by the computer as Stiles slides back onto the chair again. "Pros, then?" Scott says.
"There's the whole thing where Derek fucks me and it's the best sex I've had since... ever." Stiles says. "How do I write that down?"
"Derek fucks me and it's fucking awesome?" Scott suggests.
Stiles sends fake betrayed eyes at Scott. "He does?"
"Hilarious. Write it down."
Stiles makes a big show of sliding the computer chair closer to his computer and typing without looking at the keyboard. He turns back to Scott, looking like an eager puppy. Scott can't quite hold back a smile.
"You really, really like him, don't you?" Scott asks, although it's more of a statement than a question.
Stiles nods. "I didn't mean to."
"It's not an accusation."
"It should be." Stiles tells him. "All this was meant to be was sex. That's what we agreed on. And now I'm fucking it up because I have feelings for him."
"It's not your fault the tin man has no heart." Scott says, trying to console him.
"Why couldn't I have been his wizard?" Stiles moans.
Scott raises an eyebrow. "Because Derek's a hopeless case."
"Fuck Derek Hale." Stiles groans. His eyes light up a bit. "But also fuck Derek Hale, y'know?"
"Why are we friends, again?" Scott laughs.
"Because you're a loser and I'm nice enough to up your street cred." Stiles tells him. "Come on, we need more pros."
"Hopefully pros that don't involve the word 'fuck'." Scott says.
Derek really regrets the fact that he decided he'd be okay with living with Cora and Peter. He misses having his own space, even if it was a half burnt down house that looked like it came straight out of a horror movie. The thing is, nothing is private any more. If anything can be said about Derek Hale, it's the fact that his family seem to be incapable of staying out of his business.
In the morning he's greeted by Cora. "Doing anything with Stiles today?" she asks.
"You know, normal people say 'Good morning'." he grumbles as he fixes himself a cup of coffee.
"And by doing anything, I mean sexual acts." she replies dryly. To be honest, with her sarcasm, he's surprised she's not the perfect match for Stiles. Although, he wouldn't exactly say he's disappointed.
"Move." he says, trying to get to the fridge.
"You're avoiding the topic." Cora laughs, moving away so Derek can grab some milk. "Fine. It's none of my business. But, really, when are you gonna tell Stiles you have feelings for him?"
"I would say never, seeing as I don't." Derek growls.
"You're so in denial it physically hurts me, Derek." Cora tells him. "Go get fucked."
There's a part of Derek that's tempted to tell Cora that, actually, it's more correct to say he does the fucking, but all that would do is provide his little sister with more ammunition that Derek can fight off. She's right, of course. He does like Stiles. But all Stiles wants is a friends with benefits type relationship; and they don't really even have the whole 'friends' thing quite worked out yet. What they do have, though, is awesome sex and Derek is not going to mess that up because of feelings. He sends another death-glare at Cora before he leaves the room, armed with coffee. He hears Peter enter the kitchen and begin talking to Cora in hushed whispers. Derek's pretty sure Peter knows he can hear him anyway; he's a werewolf, for fucks sake.
"STILES IS NOT A TWINK." he yells through the door, before downing the coffee and heading off to have a shower. And if he thinks about Stiles calling himself Derek's twink and he has to stop himself from moving his hands a little bit lower? Nobody needs to know.
Two hours have passed and Stiles' 'Pros' list consists of 'Derek fucks me and it's fucking awesome' and several variations of Derek's name in capital letters. Trying to look busy as Scott comes into the room with two cups of coffee, Stiles types frantically. Scott puts down the coffee and leans towards the screen.
"Because Derek Hale," he reads out loud, shooting a look at Stiles to see if he's for real, "I'm pretty sure all your reasons are the same point written in different ways."
"You have a point," Stiles says. "He's Derek."
"There must be other good points." Scott replies.
"Sometimes he stays for a bit and cuddles. And if I'm really lucky he makes me coffee." Stiles offers.
"You ever make him coffee?" Scott asks.
"Dude, I don't want to poison him!" Stiles huffs. "Also, the fact that he has claws is an added bonus."
Scott makes a disgusted face. "I don't even want to know."
"We're thinking up pros and cons here, I can't leave some out so you're not uncomfortable." Stiles pauses. "Oh, I can add that — mentioning what I do with Derek makes Scott really uncomfortable."
Scott glares at him as Stiles types the new things on the list. Finally, they're being productive. Although perhaps most people's idea of productivity is not writing a list that consists of Pros and Cons of sleeping with a werewolf. Then again, most people are stupid, boring, or don't believe in werewolves.
"Is 'Cons' gonna be a bit quicker to write?" Scott asks. "I love you, but thinking about you having sex with Derek for another two hours might just kill me."
"This is payback for hearing about you and Allison." Stiles fires back. "And, you know, it's not just 'about' it. I don't want to hear you having sex while I'm eating my cereal."
"That was one time!" Scott yells, half laughing. "Fine. I deserve this."
"Revenge." Stiles says.
"Please don't fake an evil laugh, I will k—" Scott is cut off by Stiles maniacally laughing. Scott throws himself onto the floor. Fuck Derek Hale. But, really, not in the way Stiles does.
When Stiles stops sounding like a pantomime's main villain, the boys turn back to the list. Stiles types 'Cons' and stares at the screen for a while before Scott pushes him on.
"You've already told me the cons. Just write them down."
Stiles types, more slowly this time, as if the act of putting them down on paper will make them more real. Scott reads to himself as Stiles types. Even though Stiles is typing more slowly this time, he doesn't stop in between points. When he's done, he stares at his computer screen,
"Do you think I should print it?" he asks Scott.
Scott's too busy reading through the points. "What?"
"Print it." he says, making weird hand motions in the direction of the printer."Should I?"
"May as well." Scott shrugs.
Stiles presses the print button and both of them lapse into a comfortable silence as the list prints. Neither of them notice the dark shape outside the window.
Part Two coming up soon with Derek POV and smut. Motivational reviews will make me update more quickly. ;)