lv90047: Hey everyone! Whitney here! Thank you so much for choosing this story. For a while now, me and my friend, SuzukiChiyeko have had similar ideas for a certain storyline...and after a tremendous amount of PM messages, we decided to collaborate and share our ideas together. I hope you all enjoy this story we conjured.
We do NOT own Junjou Romantica! That right belongs to the wonderful Shungiku Nakamura!
Walking side by side, Akihiko and Takahiro made their way to Takahiro's house. It was spring break, exactly one month after Akihiko's eighteenth birthday. There were cherry blossoms blooming in the park, their light pink petals dancing through a gentle breeze.
It was a beautiful day, comfortably warm and fresh as nature was slowly growing back to life. Takahiro admired this, taking in every detail, but his friend didn't even notice the beauty of spring. Akihiko was too focused on the raven-haired male next to him, wearing that carefree smile.
"Takahiro," the young male said in a husky voice, "There's something I need to tell you."
"What is it?" Takahiro asked curiously and he climbed the stairs to the apartment, hand digging into his pocket to find a key.
There was a long pause before Akihiko spoke again. He had been wanting to tell Takahiro this ever since he realized his feelings, but right then the nervousness was getting the better of him. All he could do was wait for his friend—the person he cared about most—to open the door and welcome him inside. When Akihiko stepped inside and took off his shoes, brown eyes studied him worriedly.
"Usagi?" A lavender gaze darted up. "Is something wrong? You seem troubled."
Akihiko gave a small, reassuring smile. "I'm fine, but what I'm about to tell you is very important."
Takahiro cocked his head as he put his shoes down. "What do you want to tell me?" He frowned when his friend took a very deep breath. It was unusual for Akihiko to look so nervous around him; he always seemed so calm, almost stoic.
Clenching his fists, Akihiko gathered his courage to speak the words. "Takahiro, I…I like you." The words slipped out surprisingly easy, yet Akihiko felt as though he had just achieved something big.
However, his good feelings vanished when Takahiro smiled at him sheepishly. "Of course you like me, Usagi," Takahiro replied cheerfully, "How could we be friends if you didn't like me at all?"
Right then, Akihiko felt very tempted to do a facepalm, but he decided against it. After all, he knew what an airhead Takahiro was, so it was stupid of him to expect that his friend would understand him with that choice of words.
"That's not what I meant."
Knitting his eyebrows, Takahiro kept staring at Akihiko. "Then…what do you mean? I don't think I understand."
"My feelings of 'like' aren't in the meaning of friendship." Lavender eyes looked at the other intensely. "Takahiro, I want you to know that I love you."
There, he had said it. All he had to do was wait for his beloved one's reply, yet this thought did nothing to calm him down at all.
Takahiro looked confused beyond words, his eyes wide and his mouth agape. There was disbelief written all over his face and this pained Akihiko. Of all people, Takahiro should've been the one to know that Akihiko never joked about his feelings.
Finally, the brunet coughed and pushed up his glasses. "I-I don't know what to say," he admitted, shifting uncomfortably, "Really, I had no idea you felt this way about me. How long have you been in love with me?"
"I fell in love with you during our finals," Akihiko replied truthfully.
"So then, that would be…two months ago?" When his friend nodded, Takahiro's expression saddened. "I'm sorry that I never noticed, Usagi. As your friend, I should be able to understand your feelings, but I was oblivious to all of this."
Akihiko emitted a soft sigh. "Takahiro, you know how I feel about you now, but how do you feel about me?"
"Eh, what?" Takahiro questioned, giving the other a surprised look.
"I want to know if you can return my feelings."
Unfortunately, the young adult said nothing.
"…I'm sorry, Usagi," Takahiro began, lowering his head, "You're my best friend and I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I can't say that I love you. If I said that, I would be lying. Perhaps, if you had been a girl the situation would've been different, but you're a guy." He took a deep breath. "I'm not gay and I don't think that will ever change."
Akihiko could feel his heart break slowly, but he masked this with a faint, fake smile. Nodding in understanding, he leaned back against the wall. "I understand," was all he could utter.
"Usagi, I'm really sorry. I hope that you aren't mad at me for—" Takahiro silenced himself when Akihiko shook his head.
"I could never be mad at you…"
"Then, can I ask you if we can still be friends?" There was an uncommon amount of carefulness within Takahiro's tone, almost as though he was terrified of hurting Akihiko's feelings even more.
Akihiko sighed. "Of course, Takahiro." He grinned, masking the pain in order to spare the other man. "We can always be friends."
The brunet's face lit up like the sun at that remark. "Great!" he exclaimed as he patted his friend's shoulder encouragingly, "Oh, I'm so glad we can just be friends!"
Agony ripped through the young author from that careless choice of words—but his face revealed nothing but a mask of glee. "I am too," Akihiko breathed, a faint smile traveling throughout his lips, "You have no idea how much this relieves me."
"I know!" Takahiro gushed, "I'm so happy we could save this friendship!"
Another wave of torture plunged through the man's heart, breaking him silently. For a moment, he honestly considered telling the brunet how he truly felt; yet, when looking into those beautiful brown eyes, he decided against it almost immediately. It wasn't his place to bring sorrow into Takahiro's world. He'd never forgive himself if he burdened his friend like that—no matter how much of an airhead he could be.
Akihiko wondered what Takahiro saw on his face. Fearing to expose his true feelings, he quickly composed his features into the same serene mask, making it impossible for the brunet to identify it.
"Usagi..." Takahiro whispered, confusion coursing through him. "Are you alright?"
For the sake of his friend, Akihiko nodded.
"I'm fine, Takahiro," Akihiko said remotely, his face wiped all clean of emotion, "You really don't need to worry—I'll deal with it."
"I have to go," Akihiko interrupted, turning around only to grab the jacket he had taken off a few minutes ago. "I have other errands to run—I'll talk to you later."
"Usagi!" Takahiro called out, "Wait—!"
"I'll talk to you later," Akihiko repeated, never once meeting his friend's gaze.
And before the brunet could react, Akihiko was out of the door.
The man sighed. In his haste to get away, he realized his actions were rather harsh, but he honestly couldn't bear to spend another second with Takahiro. That voice of his tormented the young author; it'd unleashed a pain so unbearable that it'd nearly astonish Akihiko with its force. He needed to get away...and it had resulted into this.
Seeing how it was too late to go back, he kept walking until he was out of the apartment complex. Even then, he didn't stop. Time made no sense as he continued walking throughout the streets, ignoring anything—and anyone—in his path. It felt like hours were passing when it was only a few mere seconds. Maybe it felt like time had frozen because the city just looked the same, no matter where Akihiko went.
Honestly, he was surprised by how calmly he took the situation. Over and over again in his mind, he had pictured the outcome much, much worse. Yet, the more he thought about it, the less he began to understand; his mind was still in a state of shock. He couldn't feel anything below his neck, because everything was so numb.
Finally, the journey had seemed to end as he noticed his home standing before him. Without wasting another moment, he robotically walked into the penthouse, took the elevator, and opened and closed the door behind him into his private suite.
For a moment, the man did nothing. He was merely leaning against his front door, unsure of what to do. He then studied the empty room, his gaze traveling around until he caught sight of picture lurking against the wall—a picture of his raven-haired friend, staring at him with a warm-hearted look in his eyes.
The numbness Akihiko once felt was slowly evading his body. Within its place was a growing substance that slowly spread a great deal of affliction throughout his body.
"I'm sorry..." Takahiro had told him, "You're my best friend...but I don't think I can ever return your feelings."
Akihiko's face twisted in anguish from the memory of those words. Even though they were just words, they managed to rip a hole within his heart and created a pain that had punched through his chest and excised his most precious insides until they were ragged and broken.
"I'm not gay and I don't think that'll ever change," the voice said again.
Akihiko felt the cold wooden floor seeping beneath him, his hands shaking, and the unfamiliar rhythm of his heartbeat as the pain held him cold. It pulled him under an abyss that screamed his devastating reality:
He was rejected by the person he cared about the most.
Tears threatened to overtake him as the disappointment was nearly as instantaneous as the recognition. He felt the coldness of the wall through his clothes as he curled himself into a ball in order to keep the empty hole from tearing him apart.
"Takahiro..." He croaked, his body radiating from rejection. "Takahiro..."
Akihiko's love would never be returned.
Placing one knee on the bed, Akihiko loosened his dress shirt before hovering over his partner. He then placed his lips on the man below him and sucked the skin of that smooth neck, earning that wanton moan he thrived to hear.
"Nngh…H-Hey!" the brunet protested, pushing the man away slightly, "I told you not to leave any marks, you ass!"
Akihiko drew back with a smirk. "I'm hurt," he whispered, meeting the brunet's gaze, "I thought you liked being 'marked' by me."
"Idiot!" the brunet snapped, a light blush staining his cheeks, "That was before Takano chewed me out about it!"
"Oh?" Akihiko questioned, raising that perfectly arched eyebrow, "I never knew you were such a worrywart, Kisa."
The older male rolled his eyes, obviously annoyed by the situation. He gave the author a hateful glare. "Whatever. Just get on with it."
Akihiko snickered, his eyes glinting dangerously. Kisa scowled, but said nothing, earning a sigh from the other. "What is it?" Akihiko asked, confused by his partner's silence.
Kisa lowered his gaze. "Nothing," he said simply, slowly wrapping his arms around the author's neck, "I was just wondering how you became so confident."
From that response, Akihiko momentarily sat up to study the naked being beneath him. Just where did that question come from—and why did it even matter?
Yes, it was true he changed over time, but the wounds that inflicted his heart had nowhere near healed. The day that Takahiro had rejected him still triggered a pain that drowned him in a sea of agony. He knew he couldn't escape this pain even if he wanted to. It had altered his insides past the point of recognition, crumbling his sense of purpose. The only way he could lessen the pain, even if only for a moment, was to distract himself with the pleasures of sex, and he did just that.
During these years, he had bedded countless individuals—desperately seeking the comfort that momentarily eased his heart from the pain.
Kisa Shouta was Akihiko's first fuck buddy—and the only one who didn't complain about being any more than just that. He'd had other partners in the past, but found them most difficult to keep around because they'd somehow get attached eventually—and that was the one thing Akihiko did not want. As soon as any partner displayed any form of affection, he severed ties with them almost immediately. It was the only form of protection he could use to avoid the pain of another broken heart.
A whine sprouted from the brunet's lips, a silent complaint that brought Akihiko back to reality. When he noticed the frustrated look in his partner's eyes, the author smirked devilishly. Even if it was temporarily bliss, he should enjoy it while it lasted.
"Who's the worrywart now?" Kisa teased, running his hands down those muscular arms.
Akihiko ignored the brunet. Instead, he leaned down and took a hardening bud below him in his mouth and circled his tongue around it. His hands ran over the pale, creamy skin of Kisa's sides, relishing the softness that lingered there. He then groped his partner's erection through his underwear, loving the adorable whimper he received in response.
"Is it me or are you growing more sensitive?" Akihiko asked, pursing his lips.
"Hardly," Kisa scoffed, "I think it's because you've gotten better." He gasped as that hand squeezed his length.
"What's that?" Akihiko mused, the amusement evident within his seductive voice, "Are we getting sentimental, Kisa?" His eyes glimmered insidiously when the brunet shook his head violently. The man chortled. "I believe it's because of the things you say that I'm so confident, you know."
Kisa snorted. "Don't get hopes up just yet. I mean, I could say that you suck in bed, but that would be a lie. Besides—" he leaned in to bite Akihiko's neck. "—I don't think you'd be fucking me every week if I told you that."
The remark drew a rare laugh from Akihiko's lips, accompanied by groans as Kisa continued to nip at his skin. Roughly, he pulled the older male's boxers off, leaving him completely exposed to the cold hands that continued to roam around his skin. Kisa yelped in surprise as he felt that cold, larger hand fondling his member. He moaned from the contact.
All of a sudden, Akihiko freed himself from Kisa's grip and traveled lower, until his lips were below the other's navel. He licked his way down until his tongue ran over the head of Kisa's already wet organ.
"Aaahh!" Kisa moaned, tangling his fingers into the silvery locks of his partner as he waited impatiently for that incredible heat to engulf him. He shivered as soon as he felt that skillful tongue, emitting sparks of electricity throughout his entire body.
Akihiko groaned, licking slowly from the tip to the base repeatedly before circling his tongue around the head and collecting the wetness that was surrounding the slit. His tongue flickered slowly; Kisa didn't taste awfully bitter, but that was mainly because he never smoked—unlike the author. He never tasted quite the same, but Akihiko didn't mind in the slightest. Hungrily, he took the head in his mouth and slowly engulfed the entire length.
Kisa screamed. It was unusual for him to get a blowjob from another man; usually he was the one who got down his knees for his sexual partner, but Akihiko was a special case. He had to admit that it was a nice change—especially since Akihiko was very good with his mouth. Those surprisingly soft lips clamped around his excited flesh, designating warmth at every angle.
"Nnh…Haa—fuck!" Kisa cursed as he felt the saliva coating his length. He tried to yank the man off, but he only ducked his head harder in response. "Aki-chaaann," He whined quite uncharacteristically, "Stop teasing me already!"
Looking up, Akihiko retracted his mouth and smirked. "You're so eager for it today," he teased, "That's so unlike you."
"Whatever! Just shut up and fuck me already!" Kisa snarled, driven mad with want.
Akihiko studied the lustful gaze directed at himself. There'd been plenty of times where he'd imagined doing this kind of thing with his beloved Takahiro, but he knew his airheaded friend would never give him the same arousing look his other partners gave him. Never would Takahiro beg to be taken by him.
Moving up to stare within those hungry eyes, the man smiled evilly.
"As you wish," Akihiko grunted, allowing himself to be momentarily possessed by the lust coursing through him. He'd gladly give up anything to be taken far away from the bitter truth—even if it was only for a few hours…
SuzukiChiyeko: Yup, Kisa and Akihiko. Weird, huh? xD
This is the first time for both me and lv90047 to write a story with another author, so we would appreciate your feedback ^^ Since we both have pretty tight schedules - blame college - we can't update this story weekly. Please be patient; we'll work hard :)
Thanks for reading!