"Bella, it's as simple as this: you need to get laid."
Bella rolled her eyes as she took a sip of her cosmopolitan. Typical Rosalie. The problems of the world could all be solved with a good orgasm. She wasn't Sex Editor of Eclipse magazine for nothing.
"Rose has a point," chipped in Alice. "You've been so down since you broke up with Mike. There's only so much us girlfriends can do to try and cheer you up."
"Oh what, so are you trying to tell me women can't be happy without a man in their life? Come on, Alice, I expected better from a feminist like you!" Bella laughed, playfully poking her best friend in the ribs, causing Alice to nearly fall off her bar stool.
"That's not what we're saying, Bells," said Rosalie. "But I am sick of seeing that scowl on your face. It's time to turn that frown upside down, and I honestly think your 'o' face is the transition expression in between."
Bella sighed. She knew her friends were not going to give up on this. They had a point – the past few months had been miserable. She'd really thought Mike was The One. Sure, he'd had his faults – who didn't? But they were making a go of it, to the point where she had been planning their wedding. Then he had to go and screw everything up by boning his personal assistant. Jessica. Bella's whole body shuddered with repulsion just thinking of that bimbo's name. She knew it had been Jessica who had seduced Mike, and he was just too weak to resist. She wasn't sure if she'd ever be able to trust another man again.
"Rose, I'm sorry but I'm just not ready for another relationship right now."
"Who said anything about a relationship?" asked Rosalie, coquettishly nibbling the olive out of her Martini. "I have a challenge for you…" She smiled that wicked grin that Bella knew meant trouble.
"Do tell, Rosalie, I'm all ears," Bella said, sarcastically. The alcohol was starting to make her feel more relaxed than she had done in weeks, so she was willing to hear Rose out.
"Eclipse is putting together a calendar for next year. A nude male calendar." Rosalie sat back, looking triumphant. Bella and Alice exchanged confused looks.
"So?" asked Bella. "What has this got to do with me?"
"Duh! We need a photographer. I've shown Esme some of your work and she's agreed to hire you. Isn't that great?"
Bella raised her eyebrows and opened her mouth, dumbfounded. "Wow. Eclipse magazine! Your editor wants to hire me? Rose, this is huge! Thank- thank you so much!" Bella leaned across and hugged her friend, feeling happier than she had done in ages. This was an amazing opportunity.
"That's great news!" said Alice. "But I'm confused. What did you mean about a challenge, Rose?"
"Oh yes, this is the best part!" she winked. "Bella Swan, your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to sleep with all 12 male models. That should give you your mojo back!"
"What?!" choked Bella, spitting out her cosmo in shock. "Rose, are you crazy?! No." She blinked furiously. "No!" She looked to Alice for support, but her friend was just giggling hysterically.
"Come on, Bella," urged Rose. "Esme has agreed to give you full artistic direction, which means you get to pick out the models yourself. You'll be like a kid in a candy shop."
"And who says they'll want to have sex with me? Rose, you've had some crazy ideas in the past but this really tops the list."
"Bella, you are smoking hot. What guy wouldn't want to have sex with you? And here's the thing – I have to interview these guys for the magazine so I can vet them for you in advance. You know, are they single, straight? What are their turn-ons, turn-offs? It'll be a breeze!" Rose knocked back the last of her drink and beckoned over the cute waiter to order another round of drinks.
"Alice, will you talk some sense into her, please?" asked Bella, looking pleadingly at her best friend.
"Well, she is a qualified sex therapist – maybe sex is the best therapy," Alice laughed, enjoying seeing Bella squirm. Her friend had been so down since the break-up – almost zombie-like in her state of sadness. Rose's outrageous plan seemed to have shocked some life back into Bella.
Bella shook her head, but there was a smile on her face. Rose and Alice looked at her expectantly.
"What?!" squealed Rosalie.
"I said, OK. I'll do it. Your insanity is clearly rubbing off on me, Rose, but what have I got to lose, eh?" Rose jumped off her bar stool with glee, nearly knocking into the waiter with their tray of fresh cocktails, and threw her arms around Bella.
"This is going to make you feel so much better, Bells, I promise!"