A/N: I got some lip gloss last weekend and I liked it so much that I wrote fanfiction about it. 10/10 would recommend lip gloss.

Disclaimer: I don't own Homestuck or Bath and Body Works (and their trademarked scents). I only own some lip gloss.

It started out as a joke.

They'd gone to hang out at the mall one stormy Saturday afternoon after having to cancel their hiking date due to the inclement weather. No big deal, just an exchange of one plan for another in the face of unfavorable meteorological conditions. They ate at the food court and then set about walking around and browsing the stores.

They entered Bath and Body Works on a whim.

"Well, Mr. Strider, look at this," Jake picked up an orange spray bottle and read from the display it was under. "'Exotic blood orange fragrance inspired by the fiery passion and sunswept beaches of Brazil.' Do you know what that sounds like?"

Dirk looked at the fragrance spray in mock contemplation before replying, "Dunno, an attempt at psychologically manipulative advertising aimed at women wishing to inspire 'fiery passion' and feelings of being 'exotic'?"

"Nay, my good chum. Why, I rather daresay it sounds like..." Jake suddenly sprayed Dirk with it. "YOU!"

Dirk spluttered as he just barely dodged the mist of fragrant concoction in time. Vengeance on his mind, he playfully grabbed the next closest perfume test bottle, Japanese Cherry Blossom, sending a spritz in Jake's direction. He was going down.

Jake tried to deflect the floral scent with his jacket, but wound up covering himself in it- perfume was no ordinary projectile. He was contaminated! With a cry of distress, he fell to the floor, smelling significantly fruitier than just ten seconds prior.

Chuckling, Dirk leaned down to help his boyfriend up. However, he'd clearly underestimated Jake's vindictiveness: in the next second, he found himself with a faceful of orangey mist.

Coughing with surprise, Dirk fell back. He landed with his back hitting a display. Jake laughed.

"Truce?" he offered.

The corners of Dirk's lips twitched upwards, "Truce."

Jake gave him a hand up, which Dirk accepted. They lay their weapons down.

"Hey, look at this," Dirk picked up a sample tube on the nearby display. "Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin lip gloss."

"What about it?" Jake asked, playfully nudging Dirk's shoulder. "Do you want to wear it?"

"Nah," Dirk shrugged, unscrewing the cap and squeezing out a little bead of it. He smirked slyly, "I was thinking it was more your flavor."

He suddenly swept the lip gloss tester across Jake's bottom lip.

Jake laughed and pressed his lips together, smacking them and spreading the slightly sticky substance over both lips.

"Not bad," he joked with a charming smile. The lip gloss left a sweet taste in his mouth.

Dirk was about to make a witty response when his eyes lingered over the sheen of Jake's lip just a little bit longer. The shine of the gloss really did make his lips look poutier, fuller, more kissable. Jake pursed his lips, unused to the sensation of the gloss, and then, Dirk lost it.

He leaned in to snag a kiss from Jake, grabbing the other boy's collar. Jake was surprised for a few seconds before he responded to the kiss, leaning into his boyfriend. Dirk's other arm came to rest around Jake's waist as both of Jake's were slung over Dirk's shoulders. They kissed firmly, applying to each other an intense pressure that captured the sudden passion of their kiss.

Intrigued by the unusual sweetness of the lip gloss, Dirk's tongue flicked out to taste Jake's lower lip, enjoying the cinnamony flavor. Jake's lips parted and he took the slick tongue into his mouth, the traces of pumpkin lingering on both their tastebuds. His tongue flicked against Dirk's, sending a jolt of electricity through their bodies and they held each other closer, their mouths smashing together in a way that smeared the gloss from Jake's lips to Dirk's.

Their lingual organs tangoed across Jake's palette, Dirk's tongue not-so-accidentally caressing Jake's inner cheek in a lustful dance lightly spiced by cinnamon, sweetened by the sugary substance applied to their lips.

It was a minute before they broke apart for air, lightly panting as they held each other, their gazes still laden with an almost tangible passion. Dirk looked at Jake. Jake looked at Dirk.

The hand on Jake's collar loosened and reached out to grab a tube of lip gloss.

"We're buying this shit."