A/N: I couldn't focus on my work because of this fic so I thought I should just write it. Beta-ed by jesschan (jesschan-6918 . tumblr . com)
At first I wanted this to be cute, fluffy fic… I'm not sure why, but the idea changed while I was writing it. Still, I hope you will like it.
What would you choose?
Kagami has known something wasn't right since he ran to school this morning. It's highly unlikely for him to oversleep, but he was on a date with Kise yesterday – they saw a movie and then played basketball till late evening – and then they texted each other. Well, it was more Kise texting him with things like 'I had so much fun, Kagamicchi~~', 'Can we meet again soon?', 'Tell Kurokocchi I said 'hi' \(^.^)/!' and, what made Kagami blush, 'Goodnight Tiger'.
But back to the point. Usually when Kagami goes to school it's still fairly early and he doesn't see a lot of people. This time was different; the pavements were crowded and a few times he almost hit someone. True, running wasn't the safest thing to do, but still, too many people were looking at him weirdly, like they were trying to figure something out.
The teenager only shrugged then, thinking that he was probably sleepy and should start running faster or his History teacher would kill him for sure.
Before lunch break Kagami forgot about that strange feeling; Kuroko was his usually self and scared the hell out of him between the classes, he almost fell asleep during Math and Kise didn't text him. Which was weird if he thought about it, because Kise loves to send him messages during classes.
"Is everything all right, Kagami-kun? You aren't eating."
"Huh?" Kagami looks down at his lunch Kuroko was right; he almost didn't eat anything. The red-head shrugged. "I'm not hungry… Hey, Kuroko, what's wrong?!" Taiga asks, because Kuroko suddenly paled and put his milkshake down though the cup wasn't empty.
"Kagami-kun," starts Kuroko slowly as if he is speaking to a child, "you aren't hungry? Are you ill?"
"Fuck off, Kuroko," Kagami growls, picking up his sandwich. Really, he isn't hungry all the time…! Okay, maybe he is, but it's not a reason to assume that…
The Serin's ace train of thoughts gets interrupted by a loud cry at his right. He looks there; a few girls from his class are sitting together with their eyes focused on something in front of them. A newspaper? Hm… Didn't Kise mention he was going to be in one of these fancy magazines about fashion? For some unknown reason, the thought that those girls are ogling his… not-a-boyfriend-yet makes Kagami both happy and jealous.
Till one of girls looks straight at him with a strange gleam in her eyes, saying "I cannot believe it", but before Kagami has a chance to ask what the hell was happening, she stands up and leaves the cafeteria, a few of her friends going after her.
"Kagami-kun…?" Kuroko heard that too and is now observing Kagami with his expressionless eyes, the tone of his voice serious. "What was that about?"
"I have no idea, but…" Kagami rubs his forehead, putting his half-eaten sandwich back down. "When I was running to school this morning people were staring at me in a funny way…"
"Normally I would say that your ego is too big, Kagami-kun…"
"Kuroko, you bastard!"
"But obviously something happened. Did you do something to her?"
"What? I don't even know –"
"I'm sorry?" says a small voice behind Kagami, interrupting him. It's one of girls that he heard screaming, holding something in her hands. Annoyed, he barks at her:
"What? We are busy, don't you see?"
Her shy smile vanishes and for a moment she looks like she is going to cry. Dammit, sometimes Kagami forgets how intimidating he can be. He raises his hands as to show that he is harmless.
"Yuki-chan? Do you want to tell us something?"
Kagami throws Kuroko a glance. How is it that this little guy knows her? He didn't remember seeing these two talking. Oh, maybe she is a member of the library club?
"Y-yes, Kuroko-kun. I thought you ought to see this." She gives Kagami her magazine. "Page 18 should interest you." With a small bow she is gone.
"Kagami-kun, that was very rude. Yuki-chan is a sweet person, she didn't deserve to be yelled at by you." Only Kuroko can make the red-head feel bad with only a few words. "Let's check that magazine."
"Oh, right." Taiga almost forgets about it. Remembering what the girl said – he will apologize to her later – he opens the magazine at page 18. It seems to be a magazine with gossips. Kagami skips the long article about two stars that were together on Hawaii, but besides it, he doesn't see anythi… Wait a minute. There, in the corner of the page is a picture of him and Kise. The photograph had to take it after their yesterday's match – Kise is in the red shirt he wore yesterday. They are both smiling, Kagami's arm is draped over Ryouta's shoulders and their faces are close to each other. Lower, is the second photo. Without looking at it, Taiga knows what he is going to see; after all, he remembers what he did after pulling Kise close to himself like that. And yes, they are kissing, just like he thought. It's a nice photo, though. Kise's eyes are half-closed, one of his hands at the back of Kagami's head, like he doesn't want the-read head to stop the kiss.
"Read this." Kuroko hits his arm slightly and Kagami stops staring at the second picture – that red shirt really suits him – and starts reading the small article written in crimson letters: 'Is popular model, Kise Ryouta, not single any more?'. There are only a few lines about how the photographer spotted them playing together and that Kise seemed to be having fun and that "the mysterious red-head" looks like a good person, who might not even be interested in Kise's fame. Kagami didn't even know that Kise was famous enough to get an article in a magazine that you can buy in every shop in the country…
This thought makes Taiga freeze. Every shop in the country? And what… what if Kise's model agency will be angry at him because of it? What if they dismiss him? What if this is the reason Kise hasn't texted him yet? What if… if Kise wouldn't want to see him again?
With a strange lump in his throat, Kagami stands up and ignoring Kuroko's 'Wait, Kagami-kun!' he runs out of the cafeteria. He needs a quiet place and luckily the pitch is empty. His hands are trembling when he is typing Ryouta's number. One ring, two, three… Kise doesn't pick up his phone. Gulping, Kagami tries to call him again. And again. And again. The device in his hand is squeaking, because he is holding it too tight, but it doesn't matter. Nothing matters besides the fact that Kise doesn't want to talk with him. Kami, it was just yesterday that the Kaijo's ace was telling him how important modeling is to him, how much he likes it.
It was their first date, for fuck sake. Kise had asked him out a few times before and every time Kagami refused. He didn't see a reason why they should go on a date. Kise was popular with girls, so why him? But Ryouta was persistent, making the red-head fall for him slowly, more with every day. And it wasn't like they kissed for the first time yesterday; they had kissed when Kagami said that he not only accepts, but also returns the blond's feeling, after all their games and dinners at Taiga's place. Yesterday was just their first "official" date.
"The lesson started a few minutes ago."
Kagami hears Kuroko, but doesn't do anything, his eyes glued to his phone. Fourteen calls, thirty messages and no reply from Kise. It hurts more than Taiga wants to admit and he hates himself for feeling so weak.
"I'm not in the mood."
"I thought so, so I brought this."
Something hard lands on Kagami's feet. Cursing, he looks down; there is his bag, which he left in the cafeteria.
"Oh… Thanks, Kuroko." He picks it up, not looking at his friend. "I… Tell the teacher I felt bad after eating my lunch, okay?"
"I don't like it, but I'll do it." A small hand touches the red-head's arm and his animal instincts scream at him to run again, away from this place to his apartment and bury himself under duvets and blankets. Or to find that photographer and then beat the shit out of him. Oh yes, that idea sounds appealing. "I'm sure Kise-kun will contact you soon."
Kagami doesn't respond.
While he is going back home, Kagami thinks that everything makes sense. Kise never mentioned that he didn't want other people to know about them, but it would be a rational thing to do. After all, Kagami doubts that many of Kise's fans will be happy that he has someone; if there is one thing the red-head learned from his boy—from Ryouta, is that models and celebrities usually have a bigger fanbase if they are single. Something about fantasying about your favorite stars… And how many of Kise's fans will like the fact that the teenager is a gay?
This time people are staring at him too, but at least now he knows why. No-one talked to him, though. It's nice to be a 190 centimeters tall guy with an intimidating aura. 'You should smile more, Kagamicchi!'. No, he isn't going to think about it.
The apartment is cold and seems bigger than usual. Kagami doesn't even change his clothes, he just lays on the couch, looking at ceiling. His phone is still quiet. He wants to send another message, but stops himself; there is no reason to do it, right? Kise's lack of response speaks for itself…
Kami, he was so stupid, so stupid to believe that someone as popular as Kise would like him back without any conditions. It was so stupid of him to open his heart again. To give in to Ryouta's sweet promises, his honey-like eyes and pretty smile, his sing-song voice and constant 'I like you, Kagamicchi'. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Hasn't he learned anything from that mess with Himuro? There is no way he is going to be happy with someone.
Muffling curses, Kagami stands up and goes for his basketball shoes. Fuck, he isn't the type of a guy to cry because his crush suddenly decided to dump him without a word! He is going to the nearest court now and then he will throw away every single thing that Kise left in his apartment. Oh right, he will delete the blond's number too. And all messages. Everything.
He will make sure that nothing will ever remind him about Kise any more.
Kagami played for a few hours, alone. A few punks showed up after he came to the court, but they didn't even talk to him and quickly went away. Too bad, he wanted to have a 1-on-3 match just to see how much his skills have improved thanks to Riko's training.
The teenager wants to stay long, but the sky is black already and it reminds him about a certain person and yesterday's event that involves said person too much, so he goes back home, hoping he will survive the coach's wrath. It wasn't like he missed the practice on purpose or without reason. Stop, Taiga.
After he got back home, he checks his phone. The red-head forgot to take it with him – and no, there isn't any hope in him when he pick the phone, no – but there is only one message from Kuroko 'Call me'. Nothing more. Well, he expected it, right?
Yet, Kagami's chest hurt when he is making himself some supper and avoided looking at Kise's yellow apron or his favorite green mug. It's harder than he thought it would be, but the teenager manages to prepare the meal thinking about everything but him. He will be better soon, he knows it.
Abruptly, the silence in his apartment is interrupted by loud knocking. Kagami goes to the door with raised eyebrows; it's almost midnight. Who can it be? Maybe one of neighbors needs something? A few days ago he repaired a tap in that old lady's flat, maybe she needs his help again?
As soon as he opens the door, he wants to close them, but the person on a corridor pushes him back and walks into his apartment like he owns this place. This makes Taiga's blood boiling and he snarls, clenching his fists.
"What the hell are you doing here?" The questions sounds as harsh as it should and no, Kagami doesn't feel bad for the shock and pain that shows itself on Kise's face.
"I wanted to talk with you, Kagamicchi."
"I'm not interested" growls Taiga, turning around. He doesn't want to look at this… this liar. This liar who was telling him how much he loves him only because no-one knew about them? Fucking scum. "Leave my house or I'll kick you out."
"Listen, I know that you tried to call me. I'm sorry I couldn't call you back." Kagami hears as Kise is moving and there he is, right behind him, his soft, strong hand gently touching the red-head's arm.
Taiga wants to scream at his interlocutor, order him to get away from him, but cannot. Ryouta's voice is low and apologetic and Kagami can listen to him before throwing him out through his window, right?
"I-I saw the paper," Kagami says, stuttering a little. Kise's palm catches his wrist and Taiga moves his hand weakly to make the blond let go of him. "Why…?" He cannot finish this sentence, there is too much to say at once: why didn't you call me, why did you ignore me, why am I not good enough for you?
"I saw it too and I was with my manager in Kyoto in that magazine's publishing house. When I modeled for them few months ago, we signed a contract that I need to know about every information that they want to share about me." Kise turns Kagami so now they are facing each other; his big, amber eyes are boring into the Serin's ace soul, his face open and full of sincerity. "I couldn't call you because I was busy. I'm really sorry, Kagamicchi. I really wanted to… What did you think?" Ryouta squeezes Kagami's hands, suddenly looking frightened. "Kagamicchi?"
"I thought you are going to dump me," whispers Kagami, hating himself for how small and weak his voice sounded. He locks his eyes on their connected hands and gulps. "You… you are so serious about it… modeling… and I thought I could…"
"Don't finish that," Kise growls and Kagami looks at him, surprised. Isn't he the one who can be furious? But the blond's eyes are almost throwing thunderbolts and something tells Taiga to be quiet. "Don't even think about telling me you thought I was going to dump you. Everyone at the agency knows that I'm gay!" Kise yells and pulls Kagami closer to him, panting hard. "Do you think that low of me? Do you?" His tone is soft again, but this time hurt, his face pained.
Kagami shakes his head, feeling like a shit. Wasn't it kinda obvious that Kise would be with his manager whole day? Busy? And even if he wanted to, he wouldn't have time to call him?
"I… I'm sorry," he mumbles and because he cannot take it anymore, he takes Kise into his arms, hugging him tight. The familiar body pressed against his own, that musky scent and hair tickling his cheeks – everything is as it should be. "I was worried. You… I didn't know what do."
Kise is quiet for a few long minutes, but when Kagami starts to worry, he hugs the red-head back with a small sigh.
"I should have called you, ssu~~. I'm sorry for making you worried." He presses a kiss to Kagami's throat which sends a pleasing shiver through Kagami's body. "I didn't want to hurt you, Kagamicchi."
"You didn't!" protests Kagami – or more like his pride. "I was just being stupid, that's all."
"If you say so…" Kise moves back a little to look into Taiga's eyes, smiling like he is planning something. "It's late and there aren't any trains to Kanagawa plus we had our first big fight. Don't you think we should do something?"
"Hm… I'm sure Kuroko will be happy, if you sleep at his house tonight. And you can buy me burgers tomorrow" Kagami snickers when Kise's hopeful expressions changes into a gloomy one. "Are you sure you can be with me?" He asks, because he has to, because he needs to know that Kise isn't going to leave him anytime soon.
Ryouta brings Taiga's hand to his lips then and kisses it slowly, like a gentleman would kiss a lady's hand.
"I care about you more than modeling. If they ever order me to choose, there will be only one answer. And this answer is standing in front of me right now."
Kagami feels how his cheeks are flushing, but he doesn't break eye-contact between them. And to think that just few hours ago he was sure that Kise would break with him…
They move at the same time, synchronized like dancers and suddenly they are kissing; Kise's tastes as coffee and tiredness and Kagami wants to make him relax, wants to kiss him so hard that both will forget about today's argument.
"After thinking… better stay here…" whispers Kagami breaking the kiss, because of the lack of oxygen in his lungs, and leans his forehead against Ryouta's arm. Silent 'please' hangs between them in the air.
"Your wish is my command, Kagamicchi," Kise purrs and takes the red-head's face into his hands, looking at him with affection. "We will only sleep, okay?"
"Okay." Kagami lays quick, small kisses on Kise's cheeks, his eyebrows and nose. "I… I want to hold you… whole night," he admits, looking everywhere but at his boyfriend, feeling as his cheeks are getting red slowly. "Let's go then." He takes Ryouta's hand and leads him to his bedroom.
The Kaijou's ace didn't say anything in response to Kagami's confession, but before Taiga started heading towards his room, he saw that the color of blush on Kise's cheeks could rival with his hair's color.
Later, when they are laying together, in the complete darkness, Ryouta's head on his chest and their legs tangled, Kagami thanks quietly that nameless photograph who caught them together. If not him, he wouldn't have know just how much he means to Kise.
Maybe Taiga won't kick him if they ever meet.
A/N: I think Kagami is a type of guy who is afraid of getting hurt, because of his past with Himuro, but at the same time he is a type, who wouldn't cry too much if someone dump him. I hope he isn't too much OOC.