Two hours into Rin's impromptu sleepover, Haru realizes no one else is going to show up.


"Yeah?" His eyes sparkle unnaturally bright and he leans in a little closer to Haru.

"Where's everyone else?"

They're on Rin's bedroom floor, playing video games. Or more accurately, Rin plays and Haru watches, stealing the straying popcorn from Rin's fingers while he reaches for the bowl.

It's a little strange, Haru thinks, whenever he speaks up, Rin's attention swerves away from the particularly difficult boss fight to settle almost completely on him.

"I guess they're not coming. More popcorn for us!" His hand sneaks for the bowl and meets empty air.


"...Okay, I lied. They're not coming."

Rin looks appropriately guilty for a second before turning back to his game, popcorn forgotten. He slouches forward, attention on everything but Haru for once. A sigh escapes Haru while he thinks up a way to control the damage. Rin is a huge brat sometimes.

"It's fine. I'll stay."

"What?" Bright eyes on him like a spotlight again. Haru squints and looks away.

"I said. I'll stay." He almost gags. Rin is practically glowing.

The TV explodes in flashes of color and victory music streams from the speakers but all Rin sees is Haru.

"Yaaaay! Okay, I'm done this now, what do you want to play?"


The floor becomes uncomfortable, so they scramble onto Rin's bed. They sit close together, knees touching, arms bumping.

Rin giggles like a girl and tips his head in his direction whenever Haru insults him and his gaming skills. Haru's words hit him like water off a duck's back, but his sides aren't as lucky when he pulls off a maneuver in-game that he's practiced long into the night. Haru doesn't appreciate. And his elbows are really sharp.

"Look, you only suck because you don't have this game. Give up now."

"Shut up and let me kill you."

"Bah! No way!" Haru sets down his controller in disgust while Rin celebrates another victory. "Aww, don't cry, poor baby."

"Shut it before I kill you."

"Wow, jeez. Calm down, it's just a game."

Just a game, Haru repeats in his head. Hypocrite.


The cycle of throwing down the controller only to pick it up again repeats, because even while Haru loses nearly every time, he's having fun. It doesn't help that sometimes Rin will gaze at him with this look he can't place, full of worship and something else he'd rather not think about. So he doesn't think about it.

They lounge on the bed a little longer, and Haru can feel Rin sit a bit closer when he thinks he's not looking. He inches closer and closer until Haru finds him sprawled across his legs.

"What are you doing."

"Don't mind me. Just gonna borrow your lap."

Rin situates himself more comfortably, pushing Haru backwards toward the wall. He lies back between Haru's legs, his own legs hanging over the edge of the bed. His head settles on Haru's stomach and the pressure of the weight against Haru's middle magnifies the feeling in Haru's belly. It kinda feels like butterflies violently beating the walls of his insides, trying to escape.

When Rin turns to look sleepily back at Haru, he grins. Haru is maybe a little jealous he can smile so easily.

"I'm tired. It's like a handicap now! Maybe you can beat me."

If Rin considers this a handicap, Haru's at an even greater disadvantage. They turn back to the game and the sun sets below the skyline.


Haru is the one who nods off first. Rin feels him sway, stomach muscles tensing and relaxing as somnolence pulls him in. He regretfully separates from Haru's limbs and shakes him lightly.

"Haru... stay awake." He thinks about making more popcorn, or looking for Gou's secret stash of Jolly Ranchers. Anything to stay awake with him for a few more hours.

Blue eyes focus wearily, on the line of fully aware but not quite passing it.

"There must be something wrong with my eyes," Rin blurts. Haru looks at him, dazed and confused. "I can't take them off you."

That definitely gets him awake.


"Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven." Haru looks at him like he grew another head. This somehow boosts Rin's confidence.

"...You can stop now." Haru rubs his eyes sleepily. The notion pushes Rin, a force twists and pulls his insides sweetly and painfully. He grabs Haru's wrist out of reflex.

"If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'U' and 'I' together."

"Really, stop." Haru's lips twitch, his face heats up and he's not too sure why. "Those pickup lines are really lame." Rin doesn't believe him.

"Your eyes are so blue, just like the ocean. And baby, I'm lost at sea."

This one hits a little closer to home.

Rin grins victoriously as Haru's cheeks light up like a Christmas tree on fire. The thin wrist in his grasp trembles and the wave travels up his arm and throughout Haru's whole body into a nerve wracking shiver. Rin feels a twinge of guilt that he's not concerned at all but it's replaced just as quickly by a spreading warmth in his core.

"Are you... Really?"

It doesn't help Rin's case that the boy's sapphire eyes glitter as they widen. His stomach feels like a few hundred flares go off. Haru doesn't have to hear his response to know he's telling the truth. His face says it all.

"Can I kiss you?" Haru's other wrist is gripped tightly. Rin can feel a pulse flutter beneath his fingertips.


"Kiss. You. Don't make me repeat myself."

Haru squawks, jaw dropping. His tongue is heavy and useless in his mouth. Rin is serious.

"Why would you want to do that?!"

"Because I want to. What other reason do I need?"

The hands on Haru's wrists travel to grip upper arms. Rin tentatively moves his face closer to the smaller boy's, watching in fascination as Haru squirms but neither struggles or pushes him away. Their foreheads touch and Haru's mouth closes and opens. Closes, opens. Rin sinks deeper in the abyss of ocean blue.

"Do you want me to?"


"You can think of it as… as practice. Please, Haru?"

Rin sees the boy's answer in the shortness of his breath, the purse of his lips. His hands fall naturally to hold hips, and he shoves Haru into the wall, settling between unsteady legs. They fit like puzzle pieces, though shaky and unsure. Their eyes never leave the other's.

"Tell me now. Before I-"

Quiet and spontaneous, Haru kisses him first, out of impatience. Or maybe he wanted to get it over with. Still, it shocks Rin. Is there a chance Haru wants this as much as he does?

It's a soft press of lips, motionless, waiting for the other to make the first move. Rin waits, eyes wide open. The closeness makes his focus blur, but he's pretty sure Haru's eyes are still open, too. The intense heat on his cheeks might belong to Haru. Might be his. Or both.

And just as abruptly as it starts, it ends. Haru leans back until his head hits the wall. They both exhale, forgetting to breathe during the kiss, unsure how to breathe while kissing.

"That was… Let me try again. I wasn't ready."

"You're the one whmph-"

This time Rin initiates, tilting his head at an angle so their noses don't bump. His lips tingle and burn with sensation, spreading across his whole face and stretching his lips into a grin. When they part, Haru looks slightly miffed.

"You're a jerk." He turns his head away, and the tips of his ears are bright red.

"You are, too." Rin sits back, thinking. "Does this mean I have your first kiss hostage?"


"And you have mine, too. And the only way we can get it back is…"

Haru's head whips back to face him. His expression of horror and embarrassment mix with a tinge of blush and Rin can't help himself. He pecks Haru's nose lightly, in time to see him turn four shades redder.

"What do you think I meant? Don't look so scared."


"Come on, here. Have it back."

Rin swoops in without any indication and kisses Haru once again. His fingers tangle into inky black hair, holding the younger boy in place.

Haru is all soft skin, straight angles. His lips quiver at his advances and part immediately against the wetness of his tongue. The inside of his mouth is warm and it hurts, the click of teeth and- he bites down on Rin's tongue. Hard.

"Ow, ouch."

"Th-that won't do anything!" Haru is undeniably livid.

"Well. It doesn't hurt to try." But it did and it does. Rin sort of regrets it now that he's tearing up and Haru won't look at him.

He pulls Haru down to lie properly on the bed. His tongue doesn't hurt as much anymore and Haru takes a quick glance at him once or twice. Rin doesn't understand the feelings that overtake his actions when he's around Haru, but they're weird and warm and he's sure he doesn't want it any other way. Haru is lovely and captivating, eyes and form ethereal, and he makes Rin feel. It's hard to explain. He's only twelve, after all.

"You taste like popcorn. And the sea. And mackerel."

"…You, too," Haru sighs, fingers reaching between the space between them, stopping when he holds himself back. "Minus the mackerel."

Rin reaches back and tangles their fingers together. With his other hand he strokes Haru's side, brushing the skin showing where his shirt rode up. Haru shivers and curls up, but otherwise is compliant and Rin sinks a little deeper into something he can't describe.

"You didn't like it?"

"It was weird. I mean, it felt funny, your tongue. But no, I didn't… not like it."

Rin laughs drowsily. In the back of his mind he knows they still have to brush their teeth and turn off the game system, but lying with Haru is cosy and he never wants to get up again.


"We'll buy a biiig house and there will be a giant swimming pool in the back… as big as the ones they use in the Olympics."


"And we'll have a bathroom with a huge bathtub. You like taking baths right?"

"…Rin, what are you talking about?"

"…And there will be a room just for video games. And another for all the medals I win at the Olympics. And yours too, of course."

"What. Are you. Talking about."

"We kissed and stuff right? We're married now. Happens all the time in movies."

"Rin… that's not how it works."

"…We'll have five cats and the fridge will always be stocked with mackerel. Other things too, when we get tired of mackerel."




"I promise."