Why couldn't he love me…? I truly loved him, loved him with all my heart, and was willing to give him everything, STILL, willing to give him everything, if only he could forget about her. From the first moment I saw him, I knew he was mine, that we were truly meant to be together, but all he really wanted was her. When he looked at me, he saw her. When kissed me, he wished it was her. When he told me he loved me, he was really telling her.

Why did it have to happen to me, of all people did it have to be him? Don't I deserve to be happy? I really did not ask for this, and I honestly did not want it; it just happened. It's not FAIR, I had NO choice in the matter, but I ended up giving him my heart, my soul, EVERYTHING, only for him to crush it when he feels the need to go back to her! I want to hate him, show him the malice he showed me; but I can't. I love him too much. I may have his soul, but he has given her his heart.

What makes her so much better than me? What could I do to earn his love, what can I do to deserve it? I would die for him; and her, she loves another person, and will never feel for him the way I do; to the extent I do. She HAS somebody else, why does she need him? Why does he fight so much? Somewhere, in some part of a bigger plan, we are meant to be. I KNOW this to be true, but he still fights. It hurts me so much, I can barely breathe. Does he know that he was not the only one affected by this? Does he not know I had absolutely no choice either, that I can never look at another man? Can never fall in love with someone else? As if he would let me. Even though he cannot, or will not give me his full heart, and still proclaims love to HER, he will not allow another man to come near me; I am stuck being HIS, though he refuses to be mine.

If I could I would go back in time, I would go back to that day, the day his black eyes met my grey, and end it all.