AN: Well I am back. It has been too long, I've missed every single one of you and thank you for still reviewing and reading my fics when I haven't been here. I love you all to be honest. Anyway, enjoy and get your tissues ready :)

It was raining that day when Tony DiNozzo received the phone call that would change his life. The phone call that brought him to his knees, then to the floor, gasping for breath as he cried in to his hands. His breathing was uneven and he was shaking as he lay there for what seemed like hours, but was in fact only minutes.

The opened cell phone was lying beside him and it was vibrating as a call came through from Ziva David. Tony looked at the cell phone, tears rolling down his pained tear stained face and he took a deep breath as he sniffed. This couldn't be happening, it couldn't be true, Tony must have heard Ziva wrong. Tony tried denying it but he knew that no matter what he said or thought, that there was no changing what had happened and he reached for the phone with a shaking hand.

He held the phone tightly as he pushed himself up to his knees and he slowly answered the call, then held it to his ear. He took a breath as he heard Ziva's voice on the other line and he cleared his throat as he sniffed.

"Tony?" Ziva asked.

"I-I'm here..." Tony replied, on the verge of tears again.

"We need you here Tony, plea-" Ziva began but was cut off.

"It's my fault... I can't, I just can't," Tony sobbed.

"Tony, listen to me, we need you. Abby needs you, McGee needs you, Ducky needs you, Palmer needs you, but most of all, I need you... Please Tony," Ziva said, her voice breaking.

"I-I'll be there soon," Tony sniffed as he ran a hand over his face.

He ended the call as he put his cell phone in to his pants pocket and he got to his feet slowly as the words echoed inside his head. Tony stumbled over to the keys on the coffee table and he looked at himself in the mirror in front of him. His white shirt was torn down the side and covered in dried blood which wasn't his own, the knees of his pants were covered in blood and Tony remembered everything.


The NCIS team had arrived at a dock full of abandoned warehouses and they had gone their separate ways to search for the suspect. McGee had traced the suspects cell phone to that location and now they were there, guns drawn, waiting for Gibbs's orders.

"McGee, Ziva, search the far side of the docks. DiNozzo, with me," Gibbs ordered.

When Tony and Gibbs entered the warehouse a few yards away from them, it was eerily quiet until they stepped further in to the dimly lit room. Gibbs noticed a few dozen crates stacked up and spread out in the empty building and he motioned to Tony to go left as he went right.

Tony nodded as he raised his gun to almost his chin level and he followed his boss's orders as he went around the left side of the crates. Instantly, shots rang out and Tony dived for cover as did Gibbs. Tony looked around from behind a crate and the side of the crate behind him splintered as a bullet skimmed it.

"DiNozzo, 6 o'clock!" Gibbs yelled.

Tony heard his boss's voice and as he turned to his left he heard two shots ring out from behind him. Tony heard a groan and a thud, then he turned around to see the suspect on the ground with Gibbs standing above him. Tony joined his boss as Gibbs kicked the gun away from the suspects hand and the suspect groaned in pain from the two bullet wounds, one in his left shoulder and one in his lower abdomen.

"Call McGee and Z-" Gibbs began but was cut off from a gun shot echoing through the building.

Tony looked at Gibbs as he went silent and the older man's face dropped as he looked down towards his stomach. It seemed to happen in slow motion as blood began to soak through Gibbs's NCIS jacket and Gibbs fell forwards in to Tony, who quickly caught his boss then lay him down on the ground quickly.

Tony looked at the suspect to see him lying dead with a small revolver in his left hand and Tony kicked the revolver from the man's hand. Tony fell to his knees beside Gibbs who was breathing heavily as he held his now blood covered hands on his stomach.

"Boss, hang on," Tony said as he tore his own jacket off.

Tony quickly unzipped Gibbs's jacket and held his own jacket against the wound, applying pressure, which made Gibbs gasp in pain. Gibbs's blue eyes were staring at Tony who was fumbling in his pants pocket for his phone and then typing in the three digit number he needed. After calling 911, Tony quickly called Ziva and explained the situation before hanging up and focusing on his fading boss.

"T-tony..." Gibbs gasped.

Tony looked at his boss's face to see Gibbs's blue eyes half closed and Tony didn't know what to say as Gibbs's breathing got shallower. Tony held his boss's left hand in his right hand and he tried to smile as he still applied pressure on the wound with his jacket in his left hand.

"You're gonna be alright boss," Tony said.

"I-It isn't your fault... Don't blame yourself DiNo..." Gibbs trailed off as he gasped once more.

Then Gibbs was still as his head lolled to the left and his unfocused blue eyes were glazed over, staring up in to space. Tony held his breath as the hand he was holding went limp.

"Boss?!" Tony asked.

With no reply, Tony moved near to kneel beside his boss's shoulder and he pressed two fingers under Gibbs's jaw to his neck, searching for a pulse. When Tony didn't feel anything beneath his fingers, his heart began pounding in his chest and he quickly levered himself up on his knees.

He noticed blood was pooling around his boss but he ignored that and put one hand on top of the other, lacing his fingers together and then placed them on Gibbs's sternum. He began compressions on his boss's lifeless body, his arms straight, like a piston and Gibbs's head lolled back and forth with each solid movement.

"Come on boss, don't do this!" Tony yelled.

Tony remembered doing this all before when Gibbs drove the car off the docks and Tony prayed that Gibbs would pull through this time too. Tony reached thirty and then he leaned down towards Gibbs's pale face. Tony already knew Gibbs's wasn't breathing and he parted Gibbs's blue lips as he did a finger sweep of his boss's mouth, then he hunched over his face, tilted his head back, opening his airway, held back his forehead and pinched his nose closed with his thumb and forefinger.

Tony took a breath and held Gibbs's chin, before sealing Gibbs's cold lips with his own. Tony exhaled a breath in to his lungs and Gibbs's cheeks puffed out, then he sat back on his knees as he watched Gibbs's chest rise and fall, a mockery of breathing. Tony leant down and pinched his boss's nose, then blew another breath in to Gibbs's unmoving body. Gibbs's chest rose and fell then he was motionless again as Tony leaned back looking at the older man.

"Boss, you can't leave me," Tony said quietly.

Bloody finger prints were on Gibbs's nose and chin, from where Tony's hands had been and Tony started CPR again as his boss didn't move an inch. Sirens could be heard as Tony's aching arms pressed down repeatedly on Gibbs's still chest and Tony felt arms moving him away from Gibbs's body.

Tony looked up to see McGee and Ziva behind him and Tony didn't know what to do as he looked down, wiping his bloodied hands on his white shirt which was already stained with blood. Stained with Gibbs's blood.


Tony looked at himself in the mirror as he audibly swallowed the lump in his throat and he reached down for his keys. Ducky had told Tony to go home and change as Ziva went with Gibbs in the ambulance and Tony had agreed to go home.

When Tony left the scene Gibbs was in a stable condition, but Ziva had just called him minutes ago and told him that Gibbs had gone in to cardiac arrest and that the doctors called it. Tony was wishing he hadn't gone home now and he didn't want to believe that his boss, the man who was like a father to him, was dead.

Tony walked away from the mirror, with his keys in his hand and he left his appartment, still covered in Gibbs's blood. The drive to the hospital wasn't long and as Tony arrived at the hospital, he entered the building. Then he was running through corridor after corridor, until he heard sobbing in the corridor outside Gibbs's room.

Tony slowed down to a walk as he seen Abby hugging McGee and as he got closer to the room, McGee looked up at him. Tony seen the tears in his eyes and McGee just reached out a hand and placed it on Tony's arm.

Tony looked down as he opened the door and walked in to the room where Gibbs lay. When he looked up he seen two doctors pulling up a white sheet over Gibbs's body, as Ziva and Ducky hugged eachother.

Tony walked over to his boss's body, he stopped the two doctors with the sheet and he took Gibbs right hand in his hands and then Tony let the tears fall from his eyes. He held Gibbs's hand tightly, then he looked at Gibbs's face once more before Tony closed his eyes.

"I-I'm so sorry boss,"

And that is it, I'm so sorry for killing Gibbs but I needed to do something that I hadn't done before. Also if you cried, don't worry I cried too while writing this. I don't plan on doing anything else like this, so please don't hate me. Anyways, thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it, if that's possible. And please could you maybe leave me a review as they mean a lot to me and I love knowing what you all think :)