It's been forever since I've written anything. I was going to split it in two, but decided to give you guys an extra long chapter because I don't know when I'll be back.
Tsuna has no one his own age to actually talk to, but at least he's the only one who the King (and Rosebud) will willingly hang around. Meanwhile Xanxus continues his painfully awkward attempts to be nice. This chapter is really just full of fluffy bonding moments.
Chapter 17: The Neighbor Shares a Bench, a Bento, and some Benne
By some miracle, Xanxus managed to come across Tsuna within the first half hour of his search.
He was sitting alone on the now familiar bench, but upon seeing his new neighbor approaching with a determined furrow on his intimidating (but Kingly) brow, Tsuna lit up like he had just seen an ice cream truck.
Stopping in front of the child who was once again kneeling in front of his boots, Xanxus wondered whether he should be annoyed or pleased by this Japanese custom of seemingly bowing to everyone at every single meeting but he'd take either as long as he wasn't angry.
"Yes, your majesty."
There it was again. That beaming smile that was so full of unwarranted adulation and…happiness. At least that Lightning trash had a reason to give him that look. What the hell was the Brat's problem? He had been assured that no one would know who he was here and if the civilian child bowing before him really knew just how bloody his hands were, would he have still come up and gifted him with that miracle candy? Probably not, but Xanxus wasn't going to enlighten him anytime soon.
The brat's face hadn't changed in three minutes now. Aside from some blinks, he wasn't really moving at all and it was impressive as it was disturbing. Weren't children supposed to be noisy greedy little shits? In the faded memories of what felt like a lifetime ago, Xanxus knew he was until he learned how to still himself and keep quiet out of necessity. Someone was going to have to break this awkward silence, but Xanxus had no idea what to say. Those same memories reminded him that it wasn't really good to for some food to be kept out in warm areas lest they spoil and he had no idea how long the cake would keep.
He held out the box. Better safe than sorry.
The brat wasn't taking it. Why wasn't he taking it? His eyes were getting big though. Bigger than normal and by God, was it normal for Japanese children to have such big eyes? It was like they were swallowing up the rest of his chubby cheeked face. At least he wasn't smiling anymore.
He still wasn't taking the cake though.
Xanxus rattled the box as if he were shaking a bag of treats to get a reaction from a dog. There was something clinking inside. Probably a couple of utensils but it seemed to do the trick.
The brat's mouth hung open as he pointed to the box and then himself.
'For me?' His big, big eyes seemed to ask.
Xanxus shook the box again, this time a bit more impatiently.
The box was finally taken from him with a quiet "Thank you," and a reverently touched look that made his insides squirm in discomfort though he couldn't exactly place why it would do so.
As if come to his senses, the brat shook his head and glanced behind him to the bench where a several hot pink and white boxes were resting beside a blue backpack with some sort of bug eyed cartoon robot alien thing in a fighting pose.
How the hell Xanxus had missed those ridiculously bright patches of color on the old bench was a mystery he'd rather not think about. If it was a sign that he was losing his edge, that didn't bode well at all. He couldn't afford to be careless now of all times.
The brat whipped his head back so fast that Xanxus was surprised that he hadn't heard that scrawny little neck snapping.
"Let's have lunch together!"
It's been a while since breakfast and he was a growing teen so naturally he was always hungry but Xanxus could have totally refused if he wanted to. Even with those impossible big and sparkly eyes aimed at him. He could. He really could. He was just doing the brat a favor since there was no way this slip of a child could possible finish all that food. Really.
Tsuna went back to pulling out more boxes out of his bag and arranged them as neatly as he could before politely offering Xanxus the first pick.
Xanxus learned that the boxes were called bento, the bug eyed cartoon robot alien thing on the backpack was called Ultraman, the pink and white boxes were patterned with flowers and bows and a white cat with a red bow on her left ear called Hello Kitty (and NOT to be confused with her twin sister Mimmy who had a yellow bow on her right ear of which Tsuna also had a set of boxes) and the set of boxes holding what seemed to be desserts had a black cat called Chococat and another box holding some rice balls depicted a grey and white…cat…thing called Totoro.
Clearly Tsuna wasn't a dog person.
"And this is my Number Five-Two favorite food, chicken teriyaki! It's really yummy, but not as yummy as my Number Four-Ten favorite, choco-banana."
And clearly he wasn't a picky eater either. Xanxus wasn't sure if Tsuna was trying to say if the chicken teriyaki was fifty-second on his list of favorite foods or if it was between seven and ten because he had a convoluted way of doing math or a subset of favorite food Number Five that was better than Number six but couldn't be considered different enough to actually be Number Six or just tied with Number Five.
Then what did that make Number Four-Ten?
Even if Tsuna couldn't count properly, at least he had memorized the names of all the food in his boxes and he was able to explain them adequately enough to satisfy Xanxus.
"I don't know what's in it, but it's tasty!"
Eh. Whatever. It was beef. It was good. And he could order one of the men to get the recipe from the brat's mother later. As they munched away peacefully (ignoring the old woman still squinting suspiciously at the teenager from the depths of her candy shop) and conversation slowed, Xanxus felt the vaguest notion to keep it going but had to rack his brain for something equivalent to what he was learning.
"This is called a sesame seed in English." He said, prodding a tiny pale seed with the tip of a plastic Chococat training chopstick (because he sure as hell wasn't going to use the Hello Kitty one) "Depending where you are in America, they can also be called benne."
"Se-sa-me seed-o." Tsuna carefully sounded out. "Ben-ne."
A bit slow and there was an odd accent but that was to be expected. He tried a few more times, shortening the syllables and trying to cut the inflection off the end of seed as much as he could.
When he felt that he had it right, Tsuna turned back to Xanxus with an expectant look.
"Sesame seed. Benne."
He wasn't going to get rid of that accent without more practice but it was close enough. Instead of acknowledging his success, Xanxus moved onto the next thing.
"Chopsticks." He said, clicking the utensils in his hand.
And Tsuna stumbled along with the words with Xanxus only moving on if he felt that this was the best he was going to get. He could have taught the boy the Italian words instead, but...Japan was supposed to be a retreat. A place where he didn't have to have constant reminders of home and his situation there. So English it was. It was the most well-known language in the world and much more useful for someone who was probably never going to end up in Italy anyways.
They opened the castella box and sure enough, two plastic forks had been packed inside along with a few napkins with the store's logo.
Tsuna lit up like a Christmas tree at the sight of the cake and proclaimed that this was favorite food Number Eleven-Seven.
Xanxus didn't bother replying to that. He moved on to pointing out that they were sitting on a bench and at the end after all the food had been polished off, Tsuna grinned in the cheerful manner of proud children who had felt that they had achieved something of great personal value. "Hee hee. Bento. Benne. Bench. They sound alike."
"Yeah." Grunted Xanxus.
When they were done, Tsuna shoveled all the bento boxes back into his backpack and together they began walking around the neighborhood with Xanxus still pointing out things in English and Tsuna fumbling his pronunciations behind. They take a meandering path that detours into small alleys (to point out several scruffy looking cats that Tsuna is somehow able to remember all the names of), an empty lot with some large pipes stacked in small pyramids scattered around (filled with another dozen or so feral cats which Tsuna has also taking the liberty of naming), and then the property of Yukimi-baa-chan who is apparently the local crazy old cat lady and owns more cats than the number of strays Xanxus has counted today. And Tsuna could name all of them.
Xanxus is begrudgingly impressed that Tsuna who can't count beyond his twenties can remember the names, personalities, quirks, territories and movements of over fifty felines. If he could be trained up properly, the brat would make an amazing informant or even a right hand man when he got older.
Halfway through their walk, they stop by some vending machines to buy some drinks and Xanxus treats Tsuna to some melon Fanta while getting himself an orange flavored one. He's not really into soft drinks like this, but he's not in the mood for water either. It's familiar and looks and sounds safer than ninety percent of the other Fanta flavors like Squash Punch and Pine Fruit and definitely safer than whatever the hell Calpis and Pocari Sweat are supposed to be.
It's easy to see that the long hours are wearing at the boy despite his boundless enthusiasm and they're both starting to get hungry again, so they eventually make their way back home. It's not until they're the third house before the Castle that Xanxus realizes that Sawada Nana is nowhere to be seen.
"Yes your majesty?"
Already, he was incorporating the new words into his regular speech. That was good even if constantly switching between languages mid-sentence was ruining the grammatical structure. They'd sink in better if he practiced them more often.
"Where's your mother?"
"Mama? Oh. She went out. One of her friends got sick so she went to bring them some food, but she told me to go out and get some fresh air at lunch. She said she'll be home tonight but she can't make it home for dinner."
They reach the simple black gate in front of the Sawada residence and Xanxus is wondering if he had eaten all of the boy's dinner as well but can't quite bring himself to ask. Japanese food must not agree with him because there's a strange feeling in his gut that he refuses to even consider. He is not feeling guilty. Really.
The gate swings open easily enough and Xanxus realized that the child must have left it unlocked when he came out. Alone. He's heard that in Asian countries parents start training their kids to be more responsible at a younger age but isn't five a bit too young? Granted he was often alone for long stretches of time when he was that age so maybe this was safe enough for civilians too? Hell if he knew. Xanxus wasn't exactly a normal person to start with and he was a son of a delusional prostitute in a mafia run town. He had no idea what a 'normal' civilian life constituted of.
Xanxus follows Tsuna up to the front door where he found that the boy at least had enough sense to lock up that door behind him because now he's pulling a key out of his pocket to unlock it. The front door was open, but the boy continued to stand there with his tiny hands on the knob, shooting him hesitant glances under his bangs. He shuffled his feet a bit and it occurs to Xanxus that this is the first time that he's really seen Tsuna so nervous.
Xanxus said nothing, but quirked one brow just enough to show that he was waiting for Tsuna to continue.
"Y-you said you never saw Ultraman before and it's supposed to start over on tv tonight sooooo…do you want to watch it with me?"
As Xanxus's brow raised just that little bit higher, Tsuna rallied himself enough to babble some more.
"We can have dinner too! Mama made lots of food and I can't finish it all-" (That funny feeling in Xanxus's gut vanishes and he figures that there's nothing wrong with Japanese food after all. It was probably just gas.) "-and she always says 'sharing is caring' and-and then I can show you all the movies I got like 'My Neighbor Totoro' and 'Hello Kitty and Friends' and all my toys too! And-and so will you?"
That pitiful look of hope and desperation along with a dose of disbelief that he'd ever stoop to such a thing as having dinner and movie with a little brat like him makes Xanxus hold back the automatic rejection ready to fly from his lips with the force of a bullet to the heart.
He thinks of what it's like to be five and so so small and alone with nothing to look forward to expect the impossible hope that somehow the next day will be better only for the bitterness of reality to kick in and start the process all over again and again and again.
The brat's got plenty of food and a decent place to stay. So does Xanxus. And he's got a long night of watching television reruns and having dinner by himself until he falls asleep on the couch with all the lights on surrounded by whatever comfort his toys can give him. So does Xanxus. And he's probably too afraid to sleep alone even though he's in a safe place because there are vague notions of the sort of terrors that are just waiting for him to let his guard down and close his eyes.
In all honesty, Xanxus gets it. He really does because he's practically in the same boat even if their reasons for why they're alone vastly differ. When Xanxus gets back to his room, he'll probably go sit in his favorite chair. Think about his day. Have a bottle of wine or two. Clean his guns. Maybe sketch out a few blueprints for improvements if he's in the mood. Have dinner. Get surveillance and progress reports from Yamaguchi. Have another bottle. Go to bed.
Rinse and repeat. As pathetic as it is, repaying the brat has become the highlight of his days. It's the weekend. There's no schooling or tutors or missions or anything else for Xanxus to do and Tsuna won't have anything to do tomorrow either. Might as well.
"Fine. What time?"
There's awe and joyful incredulity and Xanxus wonders what sorts of things the brat has gone through to put that bit of extra oomph into his eyes. The extra oomph that says that he's used to promises being made with sweet, sweet words only to be broken over and over and over.
There was that near hyperventilation again, the brat's tiny body practically vibrating in place as if it was too small to contain his bursting excitement.
"Ultraman starts at seven tonight! So you can come at-at-uhh…"
Xanxus can practically see the little engine in Tsuna's mind sputtering and stalling as it tries to do something beyond its capabilities. Like measuring time.
He glances up into the sky, then studies the length and position of the shadows on the ground. It's about thirty minutes after five and with a start, Xanxus realizes that he's managed to kill over five hours with the brat.
"I'll be back in one hour." That was more than enough time to shower and change and put together another repayment gift.
"One hour." There was a giddy smile overtaking the brat's face.
"One hour." Xanxus affirmed. Again.
"Ooonne…hooouuurr…" He breathed out in awe.
Odds were, they would have continued along this vein for the entire hour if Rosebud hadn't appeared at the open gate and gave a happy bark at the sight of Tsuna.
She tore across the short distance as fast as her tiny legs could carry her and Tsuna screeched in terror as he threw open his front door and practically dove into the house.
Just as Rosebud leapt up and over the single step of the front porch and made a lunge for Tsuna through the doorway, the door slammed shut. The chihuahua bounced off of it with a meaty thud and landed right in front of Xanxus's leather boots.
Xanxus had never seen anyone open and close a door so fast. Not even that one don who had opened his bedroom door only to realize that the Varia had come to pay him back for his attempt to betray to Vongola to the authorities and promptly shut it. (Not that it had done any good as Xanxus had blown out the door, his target's body and the huge bay windows across the room in a single Flame powered shot. He had been praised for leaving the head-still in stunned terror-so that his then-squad leader could identify their target and have proof that the newbie was doing his job properly.)
His bark of laughter seemed to rouse the (possibly concussed) dog who staggered to her feet and looked around in a bewildered way.
Upon realizing just who was laughing at her, Rosebud began to growl.
Xanxus sneered down at her.
Rosebud gave him a half snarl, half bark that probably translated to 'Fucker' in the language of dogs before turning back to paw and whine at the front door in the hopes that she could entice Tsuna to come out and play with her.
Xanxus, still smirking, strolled out the front gate (which he decided to kindly shut behind himself-no need for an open invitation to the scum that lurked anywhere there was human civilization) and went back to his own little castle.
Fingers flying over his phone, Marino Acerbi continued to text a transcript of the entire conversation happening just over the wall separating the Sawada and Varia properties. They already had topnotch surveillance cameras trained around all angles of the house and yard but the audio could rather patchy at times and filled with unwanted noise that obscured whatever they were trying to listen in on.
He hit Send just as his best friend sent him the hand signals for 'Boss' and 'Coming' and quickly shoved his phone into the mulch under the hedge that he was pretending to be trimming. Pretending because he was supposed to be trying to figure out what had clogged the fountain in the backyard but that was too far away to hear properly and he had the best hearing as well as the fastest texting speed of all the people currently living here.
Five others covered for him, distracting Xanxus with greetings and salutes and Marino stood and did the same as if he had only just noticed their boss's arrival from their actions.
The men held their positions and let the result of years of training keep them calm and composed. Marino striving just that little bit more. He so grateful that he kept his hair shorn so close to his scalp. It would have given his real emotions away in a heartbeat.
Xanxus cast his gaze over them and held it for several seconds before nodding and continuing on his way, the good mood practically radiating off him like sunshine on a nice spring day. The servants went back to looking busy but as soon the doors to the castle closed and nothing else happened for a full five minutes, they convened in a spot out of view from any of the windows and proceeded to gossip.
"Amazing! It's just-just-aaaruggh!" garbled one man as he made clawing motions in the air.
"He-he-they-my fucking GOD."
Two of the others were clutching each other at arm's length and hopping up and down as they tried to muffle their squeals. Marino couldn't stop the painfully wide grin even if he tried and the tiny green sparks crackling across his teeth made his smile even more brilliant. Before he could even make an attempt to dampen his own glee, his best friend slung an arm around his shoulders to hug him, ignoring the way Marino's unique…attribute was making his own hair stand on end like a porcupine.
"Poor doggy though."
"I know man." He sucked in a breath between his teeth in an effort to keep from bursting into giddy giggles himself. "I know, but just think of the Boss. It's his first date and he did it all by himself."
Well, mostly. Yamaguchi did and is still doing a butt ton of stuff in the background but Boss had somehow managed to not ruin his budding relationship with Tsunayoshi without Yamaguchi or anyone else holding his hand. "And we got to witness it! Not the Ninth. Not his brothers. Not Tyr. Not the rest of Vongola or everybody back at HQ. Not even Levi or Lussuria or-or Squalo! Us!"
The last word came out as a high pitched squeak but everyone was too busy muffling their own shrieks of delight and dancing and grinning like fools to care and all thought of Rosebud vanished from their minds. Of course Yamaguchi would probably be pissed and make them redo the lawn because of how badly they were trampling the grass but it was a worry for another day.
He'd probably go and retrieve the recorder hidden in the Sawada's side of the fence, but that'd have to wait until the middle of the night after everyone was asleep. Until then Marino had a group of gossipy fanboys to dance with. He wasn't so insecure that he had to pretend that he wasn't one anyhow.
"ETA: thirty seconds!" called Yamaguchi as he slid his phone back into his pocket after making sure Marino's messages were safely saved in his own inbox. It would be important for the report he was compiling for Squalo and saved him the trouble of having to write it up himself. Not only was Marino the fastest texter out of their current group, he was also the most accurate which made Yamaguchi's job just that little bit easier. He had long since learned to count his blessings.
Men were rappelling off and away from the windows facing the Sawada property and stuffing their own phones away. A handful continued to hang in mid-air as they cleaned the evidence of their spying away and really, it was a miracle that Xanxus hadn't noticed thirty or so men shoved up against the tinted glass windows trying to record his…invitation. Yamaguchi was not going to entertain the thought that Xanxus had gotten a date for the night.
There was a squeal far too high pitched for the hulking size of the man it came from followed by someone shushing the squealer before the Boss came only to break into a fit of giggles himself.
Yamaguchi sighed and schooled his own face into attentive neutrality. The Boss did not just score a date. He did not. It was just dinner and a movie. Just dinner and a movie and possibly playing make believe with a five year old and his action figures and stuffed animals and…fine. It was a date. Yamaguchi would give them that. But it was a totally platonic playdate and nothing would convince Yamaguchi otherwise.
The cooks were back in the kitchens. Everyone else was scattered throughout the sizable front parlor (amazing how fast they could run when they put their minds to it) cleaning things that didn't need to be cleaned and dusting things that had been dusted thrice over and Yamaguchi was waiting patiently by the open doors like always. It was to this completely normal scene that Xanxus returned to as he stepped into the castle.
However there was a change to the routine. For once he wasn't in a particularly driven mood, tunnel vision blinding him to everything but young Tsunayoshi. Nor was he in that blank state, so empty and dead that most would say that it would have been kinder to actually kill him.
There wasn't any way to mistake how Xanxus was holding his head up high again as a matter of confidence instead of an ingrained reflex to maintain good posture and an aura of good humor and purpose surrounding him. There was life in the Boss again and Yamaguchi felt his heart clench. All around him, the peons were silent and still, as if Xanxus had shown up with little Tsunayoshi clutched tightly in his fist again.
Xanxus surveyed the men before him as if seeing them for the first time in a long long time. His crimson eyes lingered over each and every person cataloguing and committing their faces to memory. Finally he leveled his gaze at Yamaguchi who held his gaze but lowered his head deferentially.
Xanxus continued to hold his gaze just that little bit longer before acknowledging him.
It's been a long while since Xanxus actually called him by name.
Yamaguchi allowed just a tiny lift of the corners of his mouth, the prelude to the kind of smile his training dictated as unprofessional to show in front of the Masters of the house.
"What kind of flowers do civilian brats like? Roses?"
Yamaguchi could feel his face freezing.
"Or do I get him chocolate instead?" Xanxus mulled over that thought for a moment. "Both?"
There was a collective sharp inhale and just then the memories of a younger Xanxus watching chick flicks and soap operas with Squalo, Lussuria, Levi and occasionally the infamous Mist arcobaleno who went by Mammon made their untimely way to the forefront of Yamaguchi's mind.
Yamaguchi furiously thought about how to address this new situation. He had to make this quick because he could see some of the men turning red and purple behind the teen. If they let out that breath, they'd start screaming and that was the very last thing he needed right now.
"How long do you have until the next encounter with young Tsunayoshi?"
He just needed to portray this as a mission. As much as he didn't want to get the child involved more than he had to, it was quickly becoming apparent that there wasn't much choice. This was the most animated he's seen Xanxus since The Incident.
"Very well then. I'd suggest freshening up, Sir. In the meanwhile, I shall prepare a selection for you to choose from."
With a nod that was as much an acknowledgement as a dismissal, Xanxus returned to his room.
There were thumps as a few of the men passed out while the others devolved into incoherent babbles and silent or strangled screams and squeeing. The six men already outside were sent to buy flowers from whatever florist had the best selections and the handful of chocoholics among them were sent to procure boxes of the stuff from local shops they were already getting their own stash from.
Yamaguchi held in a pained sigh and closed his eyes even as his hands continued to deftly iron and fold Xanxus's freshly laundered clothes. By the time he opened them again, the entire load was neatly placed in the teen's closet, the boots Xanxus had just removed ten minutes ago were clean and he was being given those looks of admiration from the Varia peons who still expressed incredulous amazement over his skills.
Despite not actually being a member of the Varia at all, he was still loyal to Xanxus. There had been some distrust and outright derision from the others when this group had come together at first, but when Yamaguchi showed that he could do the work of thirty men, fix all their mistakes and problems, offer advice on everything, gather information with all the skills of an infiltration specialist and still serve the Boss perfectly, they had begun to change their tune until they were singing his praises instead and including him in all the ridiculous things they got up to.
"Roses and chocolate Yamaguchi! Roses and chocolate!"
"It's completely cliché but the fact that the Boss came up with it at all it a miracle!"
Truth be told, he could probably handle everything himself with more efficiency and far less trouble, but he knew that teaching them how to better themselves would be more beneficial in the long run. Possibly. If anything happened to him, the others would be able to step in and (hopefully) take over. Either way, Xanxus needed all the support he could get and Yamaguchi had made a promise to serve him to the best of his abilities all those years ago.
It's just a playdate. Yamaguchi reminded himself. Just a perfectly innocent PLATONIC playdate.
Even though by definition, the parents were the ones that arranged them and as far as Yamaguchi knew, neither Nana nor the Ninth knew that their boys were interacting at all, much less having met beforehand.
"Date. Date. Date~. Boss's first date~." Someone sang out.
Oh God. He hoped nothing else would happen to convince him otherwise.
"With a boy so sunny and sweet~!" Someone else chimed in.
"Even though he's barely off his mother's teat~." More and more people joined in with their own improvised lyrics and melodies.
Yamaguchi closed his eyes again and the others stopped by to watch him blindly select flowers by smell alone and create no less than ten gorgeous bouquets with meanings like hope, appreciation, and friendship in three minutes. If he'd just open his eyes, it'd take less than two, but Yamaguchi didn't want to look at the rest of the Varia peons he was currently sharing air with right now.
"How does he do that?" somebody (Marino according to Yamaguchi's keen ears) muttered.
"Hell if I know. Secret butler-martial art technique? But it's pretty damn awesome to watch."
Unfortunately they didn't stop coming up with more songs for the rest of the night.
It's X27 shipper heaven. Those servants are screaming. So is Yamaguchi, but for entirely different reasons.
Poor Rosebud. She just wants to play with Tsuna, but no one cares about what she wants.
Oh Yamaguchi. If only you knew the truth. If anyone's wondering, Tsuna's been sealed for a few months now.
Yamaguchi is a battle butler who's not into fighting or assassination but can hold his own against a surprising number of people. He actually started out as a butler for Vongola which is probably why he's so sane compared to the rest of the men. His backstory won't be revealed for a while but at least he finally has one.
This is the fic where Nana's airheaded nature and less than stellar parenting skills are actually beneficial for many people. Things would go very differently for everyone otherwise and that's not necessarily a good thing. In fact, it would be very, very bad for all the protagonists.
I was searching for a word to match Bento and Bench and then I found this.
Benne (pronounced Behn-Nee) is the Bantu-word for sesame and was brought from East Africa (Madagascar), through West Africa, and brought over to the southern United States by the African slaves. As far as I can figure out, the original was still sesame, but a different breed and nowadays most people just call the more common modern ones this. Today, depending on what part of the US you live in, Benne could mean the unhulled/black sesame seeds as opposed to the white hulled ones or it could be used interchangeably.
You have to speak a minimum of a 7 languages to join the Varia, but headcanon says that the upper echelon probably know at least three times as much or are at least fairly fluent in them. Not sure if this is the sort of vernacular Xanxus would have picked up when he was learning, but I figure that this is one of those random trivia things that you never really forget even though it doesn't have a big (or any) impact on your life.
Marino Acerbi- A Lightning user with a bit of a control issue with his flames whenever he gets too excited. It's about the level of a strong static shock, but he's still not allowed to go near gas stations or other such fuel sources without someone to watch over him as he tends to fry things when he sneezes. Contrary to what his name implies, he's actually quite friendly and sociable.