I am back and guess who POV of the day this is!
Disclaimer; *sigh* Must i continue these? *huffs* Fine! *Deep breathes* I DO NOT OWN ANY CHARACTERS IN HERE SO STOP KILLING MY DREAMS AND THANK THE REAL OWNERS! ANYONE WHO IS RELATED TO ASURA AND MISAKI BELONG TO THEIR RIGHTFUL OWNERS SO BLAH BLAH BLAH!
Misaki came back today from having fun at his friend's sleep over. I would have thought he would be full of life and joy but I was mistaken.
The kid came back looking depressed.
Akihiko didn't seem to notice, too busy typing up a storm in his studies.
I noticed however and I'm concerned because I think it has something to do with that Kusama san guy. They seemed like marvelous friends and close.
Did they have some fight?
I'm not really good at comforting people when they're down in the dumps. Never have been; the best I can do is be there and listen to the person as they speak they're heart out.
"Misaki" I knock tentatively "Can I come in?" he's locked himself in his room.
He doesn't answer and I sigh to myself.
I suck at this kind of thing.
I'm a pretty collected person when in business mode and level headed most of the time. I focus on my tasks at hand and put up a wall when bashed but throw me in a loop of personal emotion and I'm as rigid as the next guy.
Right now I'm rigid, full of emotions for the young dark brunet lying in his bed right now not answering the door to curse me out or let me in.
Haah it's like talking to Akihiko when we first started out all over again.
Bowing lower I bit my lips unsure and face beet red face but continued what I'm trying to say while removing Usami Sama's hand from my slightly bruised arm slowly.
"We knew each other from high school and dated for some time but…stuff happened and I left and the gods seemed to be against me by making us cross paths again."
"Does he still love you?" silence reigns down on us.
I am almost afraid to tell him the answer.
"I don't know." it's the truth isn't it?
"Do you still love him?" the tense silence between us grows because I don't know how to answer that. Perhaps once upon a time I did love the man with everything in me but now…I just don't know anymore what love is and isn't.
"Onodera!" love can be cruel like the man running up to me at this moment.
Or love might be kind like the author's hand grabbing mine now trying to tug me away from said man running with fire in his molten gold eyes.
Eyes that eat you alive until there's nothing left but pure bone and anguish.
That and heartache.
"Onodera how dare you run off on me like that!" Takano san was screaming at me again clearly enraged at me 'being taken from him' by Usami sensei.
He stopped in the middle of his ranting staring hard down at us. It took a moment to guess why though.
He was looking at Usami sensei hand holding my sweaty unmoving one.
"What are you doing" he was advancing on my Ex-author now with that out of control jealous gleam I came to recognize all too well. "Let. Onodera. Go."
If he hurts Usami sensei…hell will be loose.
"And if I don't want to?" wh-wha?! Why is this damn author trying to provoke this man!?
The golden hawk eyes were turning dark and I knew I had to do something or else prepare for a harsh second encounter with my new boss.
"T-Takano san ah um…we were just talking and…" I took my hand quickly out the warmth of Usami sensei's hand. My cheeks were burning with my flustering as I tired explaining something as innocence as talking to an old author.
It was futile as it always is.
Takano dragged me harshly once I pulled my hand away from Usami sensei's, not sparing time for me to apologize to the author. With a glare thrown in sensei's direction then mine Takano pulled me to the direction of our apartments building.
A saw a flash before we turned a corner of strangely grieving eyes the color of purple gems.
Must be my imagination playing tricks, because the great lord Usami would not feel pity for someone like me.
"What did he want Onodera" Takano's grip was chocking the death out of my arm bruising it more. I couldn't feel the pain though because it was numb at this point. "Well!"
When are we ever going to move on and leave the past behind us Takano san? Why play with me again when I was never wanted? When are you going to let me go permanently?
"He wanted to know why I quit Onodera Publishing."
"Why was he holding your hand then?"
Yes why was sensei holding my hand, holding it with some sweet gentleness I've never experienced before. Perhaps that was all my imagination too.
"I don't know."
Now what happened after that brutal night that intertwined our lives together and tossed us in some warped loop hole? When was it I started having feeling for the Baka Akihiko?
Now I remember; it was the month later.
Takano was becoming worse.
Always dragging me at his pace of things.
Always forcing me to do things I didn't want to do.
I couldn't refuse however; my heart was still with him and I hated myself for that.
He knew that, that's why he used it to bend to his will.
My yearning for emotions
I would stay in my apartment when I did manage to get away from Takano san. Locked in my room or sprawled out on the floor in the living room weeping from the intense emotional pain of it all.
The day that became that stepping stool to end those pains came as I was sitting in the office trying to get my mangaka on task before the deadline came and I got scolded by my boss.
It was a cycle I came to adapt to and adjust my life to evolve around.
I was on the verge of passing out when Isaka san, the president of the company's son, came in and strode straight to me. "Ono-tan! I have some good fortune for you~" he poked me in the head with a finger.
I groaned at him to stop.
Too tired to speak properly but Takano had enough energy to yell at the goofing man poking me. "Oi stop distracting my newbie from his work!"
Yes HIS newbie he said.
I didn't own myself no more once set foot in this place or our apartments.
"Oh but Takano I need your dear newbie chan! A great author has requested him to be their editor right away! I can't turn him down so say goodbye to Onodera for two hours or so for now on during work time" eh?
"What" I disrupted them before Takano threw a fit "But I'm just getting use to things right now and…" he waved me to silence.
"No worries Ono-tan! You're going to love this; the author isn't a mangaka. He's a literature author and a familiar one to you at that." Familiar? "He's signed to our company yesterday so be nice everyone."
I know lots of authors that I've met in person so guessing who this one might be was torture and unfruitful.
So it came as a shock to me when Usami sensei came in view smirking at my expression which I could only imagined how it looked.
"Hello again Onodera." He was calm and collected; something I seemed to have lost by that time.
Why would he want me as his editor again?
What's this about?
"Hell no" oh no Takano san! "Onodera is not, definitely NOT working with that guy!"
"Oh yes he IS Takano." B-but why?
Shutting the demon editor (and life wrecker) up Isaka turned back to me. "Now Onodera be kind to your author and go with him now. Your other authors will be put on hold for now."
Oh shit what the hell have life got me into now?
"You heard the man Onodera, come with me."
The man took me to some isolated café after we left the building. I didn't know why he took me away like that but he was insistent to go to some secluded place.
Right when we sat down in a booth, I went straight to business mode. It was what I needed to get some normalcy back and be someone I knew how to be again.
"So where the manuscript you want me to go over sensei" I held my hand out but he chuckled in my face.
"Always to business with you Onodera." It wasn't teasing I could tell as far as that but I couldn't understand any more.
"Isn't this why you wanted me as an editor again?" I retort back retrieving my hand. Something wasn't right, something was off with Sensei. "Why did you resign from my father's company and come all the way here?"
It made no sense as far as I could see.
He made no reply for a while and just basked in his coffee when the waitress served him. After a couple sips all he had to say were "Only you were the best editor in that damn place that did the job with passion and not for his paycheck. I want only that kind of person to edit my books no one else."
To say I was flattered was beyond an understatement.
I think I was blushing when I heard those kind words from a seemly cold hearted author. That never happened before which proved something was off.
My cheeks burned "Um…wow…never thought the cold author himself would one day praise a common editor like me. Thank you" this wasn't the normalcy I was hoping for.
I didn't know what or how to start some conversation if he wasn't going to give up his work. I couldn't threaten his toys since we weren't in his home.
So I sat there staring down at my own coffee.
"Are you and him dating?" what?
My eyes snapped up to the man like he was an insane person that escaped an asylum institution. "E-excuse me?"
"He seems to be an asshole if you are."
It struck me what he was talking about "You mean Takano san? No I'm not dating him!" I hissed at the dense guy looking around in case somebody heard.
"But he seems to be dating you?" what does that supposed to mean?
"We're not." My voice shaked unwillingly "He's just-haah-hanging onto the past and trying to get me to fall for him again."
I look away out the window praying that's the end of it.
It was too much to hope for.
"He seems to have you confused." Ba-bump!
Angry that he won't just drop this I glare at him "Look I came here to work not to talk about unpleasant things and if you aren't going to do that then I'm heading back to my job." I can get fired for this but I couldn't care less.
The mighty author however had different plans.
"You should go out with me."
….. "WHAT?!" I screamed then quieted down when people looked at us "Are you drunk or something sensei?! What has gotten into you?"
"I like you Onodera."
Is this some sick joke life?
Are you seriously messing with me?
"Have a nice day sensei." I got up ready to storm out when Usami sensei's long arms grabbed me around the waist. "Let go please."
"I'll win your heart over before him Onodera, remember my words." He let me go after that overwhelming confession or sick joke and I took my chance to run back.
The day went on as any other but his words remained glued in my brain.
What was going on in this world?!
What is going on with these people?!
What the hell is going on with me?!
It was all a joke I convinced myself. A badly said joke that is all so stop thinking about it!
That night I had to deal with a crazed Takano san and it wasn't pretty at all. He trapped me in his house again with the excuse of work because I was lacking as I always seemed to be with him. Enough wasn't enough so it seemed.
I knew the real reason however.
It was because of Usami sensei and Takano was not merciful at all.
By the time I was allowed (ALLOWED I will say again) to leave his apartment I was reaching my breaking point. My tough act and everything I did to keep my emotions under wrapped.
I couldn't walk that well and my legs kept giving out until I just gave in and slid to the ground with my hair messy and clothes poorly put on.
I let the man use me again.
I couldn't fight him like always, I'm so weak and I could feel my mask finally withering to ashes from my face.
So I cried.
I cried not caring who found me in this state of utter patheticness. My heart and brain at war; trying in vain to go back in time and prevent some like me from being born.
My heart was breaking all over again. The bandages I placed over the cracks were coming undone and the scars were ripping themselves open. My pain was bleeding out like a river, an never-ending river flooding my body until they came out as tears.
I'm so pathetic.
Letting others run my life.
I'm a fucking puppet!
A stupid fucking dense puppet!
"Onodera?" not bothering to make a new mask and put it on I looked up brokenly. Uncaring, how the owner of the voice saw me because I wanted him to see just how pathetic I was so he wouldn't want me.
But the eyes I saw weren't appalled like I wanted them to be.
They had emotion in them.
Emotions that scared me.
The lock on the door opened making me fall backwards and hit my head on the floor. Luckily the floor was rugged so it didn't hurt that much.
In my thinking I was sitting against the door.
Better be careful next time.
"Onodera san?" Misaki looked down at me confused. I could see that his eyes were puffy and slightly swollen but instead of saying anything that would embarrass the kid, I smiled sheepishly.
"Sorry for ignoring you" his voice was quiet, soft, and scratchy indicating he was crying.
"It's ok, you look like you needed some alone time but…ano…would you want to talk about it? I will listen if you need to rant or something."
We remained glued in our positions; him looking down at me who am lying on my back on the floor of his room. Slowly a blush spreads on both our cheeks at this comical display and he politely smiles.
"That might be nice…thank you."
I smile "Don't mention it."
I wish i could have gotten this done sooner but homework that i have been neglecting calls and so please review and tell me your thoughts.
For now i am going to TRY and do some homework (oh boy)
Neko no happy right now:l