Chapter 4- Healing

*****Draco*****

It was his mother's fault for making Draco think of weddings. But that didn't make it not what he wanted. He looked once at the rings Astoria had returned, old family rings. They wouldn't work for Hermione at all, and not just because he had once given it to someone else. She would need something new, picked out with her in mind, and not as ostentatious as these. Something that reminded him of Hermione, perhaps something that could be found in muggle London- he had visited the muggle world a few times in his adulthood, out of curiosity.

Of course, this was pointless fantasizing.

But maybe with enough time… She certainly cared for Scorpius enough, loved the boy, didn't she? Not that he would want… Hermione to stay out of… obligation, or to see Scorpius… or gratitude that he'd found her parents, assuming he found them because… that wouldn't be enough, would it?

Would that be any better than his last loveless marriage? Yes, it would be. They could have a nice companionship but… he wanted more. Whatever had happened before, Weasley was an idiot, but of course, Draco had always known that.

*****Ron*****

Dear Weasley Family,

I regret to inform you that Rose Granger died soon before birth. I am recovering at a friend's home, and I ask that you not send owls at this time. Thank you for the support you have shown me since I was a child at Hogwarts, even though the last year and some other years have been very difficult.

Respectfully,

Hermione Granger

One of his oldest friends was hurting, and there was nothing Ron could do to make it better. Who was this friend that wasn't him or Harry or Ginny? And that sort of thought was why they weren't married.

If they'd never been married, never been… more than friends, she wouldn't be hurting. And he was hurting too. Because he had wanted a big family. When Hermione got pregnant, he'd been ecstatic, because that was going to fix all of their problems. Terrified, but thrilled. Because of course they'd stay together for the baby… and have one or two or four more to keep the first baby company. Hermione had wanted two kids, he'd wanted four or five but… they'd figure it out, he had thought.

He'd thought there were two rules to marriage, don't be violent or break any (big) laws, and don't cheat on your wife. And he hadn't done either, even when he'd had opportunities.

But they hadn't stayed together. Ron had lost the baby when Hermione wanted full rights. It just sort of… made sense. He couldn't raise a baby by himself and… Hermione was brilliant at everything she did.

Mum was furious at him and Hermione both, but at least Hermione didn't have to come 'round to hear it. But Ron figured he'd still see the baby. And maybe one day… Well, they'd fought so often as friends and always made up, and done the same when they were dating… so on some days he would hope… that they'd be a little family.

Two kids could be enough for him, especially if they were a boy and a girl. He'd always pictured boys, because Weasleys had boys but Rose… had sounded like a good name. She'd be more Hermione than him, Ron had pictured… the smartest witch of her age. And maybe Ron would get to teach her flying too. But now…

Mum cried a lot from the letter, and Dad too, and Ron. And Fleur, who had a little girl who wouldn't be much older than Rose. Ron had thought they'd probably be friends.

Harry and Ginny had looked like they'd already known, but Ron hadn't wanted to ask. He sort of hoped they had knowns though, because it meant that Hermione had at least talked to someone, even if Ron couldn't be there for her himself.

They'd really never get back together now.

*****Hermione*****

She had often been called the brightest witch of her age. She had only disliked that it seemed to stipulate gender, when she wanted to be the brightest student regardless of such a division, though the age striation did not bother her nearly as much.

Seven years at Hogwarts (once she returned belatedly for her seventh), had not been enough. So, Hermione pursued a Mastery, a much less formal system of reading, writing, creating, submitting for peer review. Ron- and others- had questioned why she would study more when she intended to enter the Ministry in a few years, likely on an entirely unrelated career path. And she had never had a very satisfactory answer, but she still felt that she had not learned enough.

Hermione would always have the complex of worrying that she could never know enough, because she'd missed that formative childhood exposure. She had not been in the magical world for the phase of life when children have such a great capacity to learn that they do not consciously recognize all the knowledge they amass. Wizarding children must take the ways of magic to be as intuitive as gravity.

It was convenient now, that Hermione was studying. She had something she could do to feel productive, other than caring for Scorpius.

It took some time for Hermione to decide that being the smartest witch of her age wasn't the most important thing in her life. It was simply all she knew how to be. It was a large part of how she functioned with Harry and Ron. She was the researcher and mass of knowledge.

But Hermione didn't have to be particularly intelligent to feed or clean Scorpius, and sometimes that was nice. And she… didn't even have to be particularly observant to notice the way Draco watched her. At first, she accepted easily that he was just watching Scorpius, but he often wasn't and… it would be self-denial to not admit that it was excellent for her self-esteem.

She hadn't seen looks close to that since she was fifteen and hadn't been ready for them from Victor. Ron had been more of a friend that shouldn't have been more. And if they were lucky, they could be friends again, eventually. Maybe friends who weren't alone in a room together without a very structured task.

And maybe she'd messed it up by not… really kissing Draco when he'd seemed to be responsive but… Hermione Granger had never pursued a man in her life and… that seemed even less progressive than most of the magical world but... But surely this wasn't the proper time to start trying? Especially when in many ways, Draco depended on her more than she on him.

Yes, she was staying at his house, but she was also providing sustenance for his son that Draco and Scorpius had come to depend on, even if they could manage with bottles. Her nursing wasn't- vital for Scorpius to live but she couldn't leave him. And therefore, she couldn't mess this up.

*****Hermione*****

Hurt- that he didn't think she was doing a well enough job. Anger- for much the same reason. Determination- to change it. Hermione Granger didn't give up so easily.

"Draco, there's something I'd like to discuss with you," Hermione said, stepping into the nursery. She was gripping the parchment so tightly it was crinkled now.

"Yeah, sure," he said easily, looking up from baby Scorpius who was playing with his toes.

"I didn't intend to read your mail. I just… the letter was from the hospital and…"

"It's fine. Go on," Draco said, looking concerned.

"The woman who was to be your wet nurse is ready, but I think you should consider… It would really be less disruptive for Scorpius if I would just…"

"Stay," Draco completed.

Good. "Yes, it would be less disruptive for him. Now, I'm sure you have other concerns," Hermione started. They hadn't every written anything down, no contract or…

"I don't. Please stay. Please." Draco responded... surprisingly emotionally.

"I would like that. Just until he is weaned. At six months or a year. Or two, especially since he was premature, perhaps…"

"That's not long enough," Draco said. What?

"Draco, once Scorpius is old enough to form memories that he will carry later in life, most people really don't-"

"No, no, not that. Just that I… want you around longer than Scorpius would need you to feed him. He'd still need you. I will still need you."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm asking if you'll stay. As long as you are willing. Even after Scorpius is weaned. After he's in Hogwarts even."

That was… what? "And what would I be, huh? Nanny? Graduate to mistress maybe? Draco, we haven't even… except that one kiss. And it… almost sounds like you're proposing to me."

"Hermione Granger, I've wanted to kiss you since I was thirteen years old. I probably would have done it if I expected to get anything more than another slap in the face for my efforts. Not that I didn't deserve the one I got."

"I'm sorry about that," the Hermione responded, toying with the seamless lines in the wooden floor with her bare feet.

"I said I deserved it. And worse. But now will you marry me?"

"Draco, I'm not in the- mood for games. People didn't just propose to witches after living with them for a few months. 'Living' meaning strictly coexisting- not having sex or even close to it."

"I'm completely serious. I have a ring in my room. A new ring, bought for you. I did research that no one… suffered for the diamond even. 'Oppression free' they call it because- maybe knowing you made me think about that too. And there's two rubies on it because- I thought you might want it because of your house. And there's too much green around here. Or you could pick out your own ring. I even read about muggle created diamonds. I don't know how they can make gems that don't vanish eventually- but- those didn't seem to cost enough, so maybe they aren't very good, which I know you'll think is stupid. But… you need to know that I'm really serious about this."

Breathe. Breathe.

Breathe. Breathe.

"What if I can't have kids? You are- so good with Scorpius, I'm sure you want more kids." She had always wanted to be a career woman. Hadn't thought much about kids until she was pregnant, but then… she couldn't think of anything else.

"I don't need anyone but the two of you," Draco responded without hesitation.

"Go get the ring then," Hermione squeaked. If he really had a ring…

Draco's lips parted, eyes wide. He dashed from the room, both arms wrapped securely around Scorpius so he wouldn't shake while Draco ran.

He half sprinted back into the room, sinking down on both knees in front of her.

Don't cry.

Don't cry.

"Hermione Granger, will you marry me? Well, us. Scorpius as your son is part of the deal." A family. A whole little family.

"Yes," tears escaping.

Draco rose to his feet, still holding Scorpius, who was being surprisingly quiet during all of this.

Balancing Scorpius against his chest and one arm, Draco slipped the ring onto Hermione's finger.

"Can I… hold my future son?" she asked.

Draco handed over the willing baby. "Can I kiss my future wife?" Draco whispered.

"Yes," she said, still not quite believing that all of this was happening.

The warm hands on her cheek, the soft, full lips against her chapped, worried ones seemed to say otherwise. It was a very nice kiss.

*****Draco*****

It was a quiet ceremony. With her parents- it had only taken about a month for his contacts to find them- and Draco's mother, and Potter and Weaslette. Hermione had offered to have the wedding in France so that his father could be there but… there was still a lot of healing there that needed to happen. And with the Weasleys too, he supposed.

They had talked about vacationing in Italy, or America, or anywhere really, for a honeymoon, but both just wanted… some time to relax at home.

They put Scorpius to bed as usual, both knowing he's be awake again in a few hours.

Leading each other by the hand, they walked slowly to the master bedroom. Their room.

"You know, just- because we're married doesn't mean we have to- do anything you're uncomfortable with."

"I'm- curious," she said. "I'm sorry- that sounded terrible. There's more than that, really," Hermione said nervously.

"I love your curiosity," Draco declared, and noted her sharp intake in breath. "I love you, Hermione Granger."

"Malfoy."

"Yes?" he asked, voice pathetically full of hope, which just didn't bother him anymore.

"No. I mean… I'm Hermione Malfoy now. Or I will be as soon as the paperwork goes through."

"It doesn't have to be," Draco said hurriedly. "I'd never insist you take my name- not that I'd think I could make you do anything."

Hermione smiled. She was so beautiful. He- didn't even any longer feel guilt over her smaller teeth. She could choose whatever she wanted. "Draco, being a forward-thinking feminist witch doesn't mean I can't follow a few old traditions. I- would like to have the same last name as my husband… and my son."

"I- we can change, Scorpius and I. Malfoy-Granger, Granger-Malfoy. Or- just Granger. I know what's really important now, Hermione, and it's not blood and- I'd do anything to show you," he promised.

"Well, maybe I take it as a challenge to reform the name Malfoy. Or perhaps it's just that you've given me so much. My first family back, and a second family too."

"Hermione, you don't- owe me anything," Draco struggled.

"I know," Hermione smiled. "In fact, you owe me quite a lot. I understand that wet nursing with additional child care doesn't come cheaply. And you managed to find a way not to pay," she teased.

"I'm a sly Slytherin," Draco hissed, wrapping arms around his new wife and kissing her earnestly. Nothing was magically fixed. They were a small family who had suffered throughout their teenage and young adult years, and the loss of Rosie so recently… Even if perhaps Rose was who made this whole relationship with Hermione happen, and that had brought Draco so much joy. And slowly, they'd explain it all of Scorpius and any future children they might have, or not have. But if they could possibly help it, then Scorpius would grow up in a better world than they had.

Epilogue

*****Draco*****

"I think it's about time we think about weaning Scorpius," Hermione announced one evening, about a year into their marriage. It was longer than they had intended, and Scorpius ate so much normal food now, but nursing was peaceful family time to then. Often Hermione would read aloud.

Scorpius was playing his favourite game, chasing Crookshanks. The cat never allowed himself to be caught, but stayed just out of reach, watching the baby run and giggle until the feline tired of the game and jumped somewhere high out of reach. They would only touch when Scorpius was calmly nursing, and Crookshanks would creep onto the other side of his mistress's lap.

Draco's throat went tight. Not quite yet, just in case. "There's a five-month-old girl that I'm supposed to meet tomorrow, to be our first in the program- if she's a witch," Draco said. "She's at an orphanage in London right now."

"That's great. I hope she has a wonderful home soon," Hermione said warmly.

"Do you- want to meet her?" he asked.

"I- why?" she asked.

"To see… if you wanted to consider adoption… ourselves," Draco said. He should have started asking months ago. They'd stayed on potions since they were married. They'd talked about trying someday. The healers had said there shouldn't be a much higher than normal risk of… what happened to Rose happening to them again. Muggle doctors hadn't been able to give a different opinion. But if there was already a little girl who needed them…

"I- suppose if she's a witch and you like her, I could meet her, if you want," Hermione said, watching him closely. Her eyes were beautiful.

"What if she's not?" Draco asked, heart beating faster.

That, got a stare of surprise. "You'd want to adopt a muggle girl?" she asked.

"I've read her file more than a dozen times today, stared at her picture. I've got to hand this off. I can't just… watch," Draco admitted. He'd wanted to handle the first case personally, but he had others who could have now.

"Wouldn't that be difficult? What do you know about raising a muggle? She asked.

They'd figure it out as they went, right? Same with Scorpius. And it would probably be easier because they wouldn't have to worry about magical tantrums.

"I- think it would be hard to grow up in a family of magic without it," Draco said. Scorpius had already done a few little things, mostly in his attempts to catch Crookshanks. "But wouldn't it be better than to grow up without a mum and dad?" he asked. "But I'm almost sure she is a witch," Draco said quickly. "There were accounts that sounded like accidental magic. And- and the timing would be good if you wanted to nurse her. She'd be about Scorpius's age by the time you'd plan on having your mastery done," Draco pointed out. "And you wouldn't be delayed, because I'll be spending a lot less time at the Ministry," Draco promised. Every time he left Scorpius, his heart hurt. But it was already hurting right now, for this little girl. It would be harder to adopt her if she was a muggle, because she'd need to keep an identity in the muggle world, which Draco didn't have at all- but Hermione did, and surely a little magic and bureaucracy could do it.

"Draco Malfoy, I love you," she breathed. "What's her name?" she asked.

"Violet," he said.

"Tomorrow, you said?" and her eyes were watery.

"Tomorrow."

A/N: There! I didn't think I'd be writing anything for a while, after Morphed Secrets finished but… The idea of redoing this story with a reversal of fate wouldn't leave me alone. I didn't want to repeat any scenes that I thought would be too similar, so I didn't, but I really enjoyed writing this, and I always appreciate your support. Thank you!

And after this story, I thought I'd definitely take a break but… I haven't stopped writing, so I'm sure I'll be posting something soon.