WTF?

Prologue.

Disclaimer: I do not own harry Potter or any characters in the Harry Potter series. I also am not making any money from this and so there.

Harry Potter blinked and found himself in a room akin to a waiting room in a Muggle Doctor's office. Not that he knew what that looked like from personal experience, but he had seen something similar on the telly one of the few times he glimpsed it while working for the Dursleys. The room was a bright white and he saw that he was the only person in the room besides what appeared to be a receptionist who was busy working on a computer.

The woman finally seemed to notice him as she suddenly looked up directly at him and her face went very pale as he heard her swear under her breath.

"Harry, what are you doing here?" She asked him in an exasperated voice. Harry was now very confused as although he did not know the receptionist, she certainly seemed to know him. His confusion must have been apparent as she sighed and picked up a phone and tapped out a few numbers. She waited for a few seconds and then began whispering into the phone. From what he could hear of the other person's conversation, he gathered they were not pleased. After a minute or so, she hung up the phone, turned back to him, and gestured to the door behind her.

"Please go through the door Harry and follow the hall to the door at the end. Marcus will be waiting for you."

Harry nodded and walked to the door and through it. He found himself in a long hallway with no doors bar one right at the end. He approached the door and knocked lightly. Hearing a voice bid him to enter he did so.

The room he entered was a rather cosy looking office that had wood panelling and a large bookshelf behind the desk filled with large and apparently old tomes of knowledge. To the left of the desk stood a row of wood panelled filing cabinets. Harry's attention then switched to the occupant of the room sitting behind the desk. The man had stood when he entered and Harry's head craned backwards as he met the man's eyes. He must have been at least 7 feet tall and had quite an athletic body that was encased in a finely tailored suit. His hair was black and shoulder-length and his eyes were a piercing blue that seemed to bypass your eyes and look right into your soul. His skin though rather than being the normal healthy pink was a pale white.

As harry approached the man before him he saw the man begin to smile. The smile was not a happy smile; it was not pleasant at all. The smile reminded him that he had important business somewhere else far away, from where this man was. Marcus held out his hand to Harry, who out of instinct grasped it. He felt how incredibly strong the man was, although he did not hurt Harry, Harry could feel the barely contained strength behind the grip.

"Hello Harry." The man known as Marcus greeted him. "You are probably wondering what the hell is going on and how it is I know you. Take a seat and we'll talk so you fully understand before I explain your options from this point onwards."

Harry relieved that the man was not going to do something horrible to him sat down in the comfortable armchair that was situated on his side of the desk while Marcus sat his quite large frame in his padded office chair.

"Well the first thing to let you know is this is the receiving area for the newly departed from the world. This means that at this point in time you are dead." Marcus explained to Harry.

Harry on his part did not really feel that surprised. Considering all of the trials, he had gone through before and after finding out about the magical world and being a wizard, knew that one day his luck would catch up with him and he would end up in this situation. Taking note of Harry's apparent acceptance of the facts so far, he continued.

"Unfortunately this is not your first time to see us as you may have figured out already by the fact that the receptionist and I know you by sight. This is in fact your 8th visit to us, well before your time to depart according to your fate."

Harry was simply shocked at this point. Eight times? He knew his luck in his life was shitty to be honest when it came to getting into dangerous situations, but his luck then also managed to scrape him out of most situations without harm or if he was harmed, it was easily fixed. He now wondered if he had really been as lucky as he thought.

Marcus, seeing his contemplative look, nodded before retrieving a large folder from one of the filing cabinets. He sat back down and opened it and pulled out a piece of parchment and began to read.

"Your first death occurred only when you were 4 years old and your Uncle beat you so severely that you died in the night. Your second death occurred when you arrived back home from the zoo and your cousin's eleventh birthday after you set that snake on him and his friend. Again courtesy of your Uncle. Your third death was during your first quidditch match when you actually did fall off your broom as your soul mate, some Granger girl was not quick enough to set the teacher's robes on fire. The fourth was during your second year when your head affected the dashboard of the car your friend flew to Hogwarts. Your fifth was that same year when the basilisk bit you and Fawkes was too late. Your sixth was during the fourth year when the dragon broke it's chains before your broom arrived and you were eaten. Your seventh occurred when you were poisoned in your sixth year by a poorly dosed love potion courtesy of a Ginevra Weasley. Last, your eighth death was just today when you allowed yourself to be struck by the killing curse." Marcus read off in a monotone voice. Even though his voice held no emotion, you could see by his eyes that this being was supremely annoyed. Harry just gaped as he tried to absorb all of the information. Finally, he said

"So when I thought my luck had carried me through I actually had died and what, you guys fixed it somehow?"

Marcus smiled and nodded.

"I'm actually glad to see that all of the potions effects have worn off so quickly after your death. You are normally not as articulate and analytical until about an hour or so after you arrive. Before you ask, yes you were dosed with several potions, a wit dulling potion that you have been on since you first arrived at Hogwarts, a loyalty potion to Dumbledore, an anger-inducing potion that was introduced to you during your fourth year holidays and finally the aforementioned love potion keyed to Ginevra Weasley." He answered.

Harry absorbed this information as well and Marcus was pleased to see that Harry was beginning to get angry at his situation. Good, he thought, he needs to be angry. Creator only knows he has every right to be.

"So let me get this straight," Harry said through clenched teeth," Someone has been deliberately keeping me unprepared, stupid and off-balance and then to top it off the youngest Weasley had me on love potions for the last two years?"

At Marcus's affirming nod, Harry fumed and asked

"But why? Who would go to all this trouble?"

Marcus sighed and sat back, putting down the folder for the moment and folding his hands in front of him. Looking at Harry, he said in a kind voice

"It is the same man who is responsible for the majority of your deaths Harry. This man is responsible for where you were placed as a baby and has been manipulating your life ever since. The experiences you had at school each year were tests set up by this man in order to test your mettle so to speak. If there came up a situation that he did not create himself, he would manipulate the situation to make it into a test for you, such as your third year."

Harry knew who Marcus was talking about but just to be perfectly clear, he stated

"Albus Dumbledore that is who you are talking about."

Marcus nodded silently.

Harry sighed and closed his eyes for a second, wrestling control over his temper that he never knew he had. He though bitterly, thanks to the potions I was on I had no control. Once he felt more level-headed, Harry looked back up at Marcus and asked

"Okay, I gather this time I died is different, otherwise why would you bother telling me all of this? I gather my memory of being here before was removed before I was sent back, so that must mean this time is different as you have told me all of this information, which would be a waste if you were just going to wipe my mind again."

Marcus smiled and nodded, actually impressed by Harry's intellect. This was probably because each time Marcus had seen him; Harry had been under the previously mentioned potions and thus did not have cognitive ability.

"Well," Marcus began, "You are right. Normally we would just wipe your memory. However, upper management is rather pissed off at one Albas Dumbledore and his machinations. Since he is responsible for the majority of your deaths and you only got killed in the other cases because of bad information, we have decided to send you back with your memories up until the moment you died this last time along with some other information I will be giving you in order to make your destiny go a lot smoother and reach its proper conclusion. On top of this, I will make regular visits to you to check on your progress and give you any hints or information we have come up with when you change the time line. Before you ask, yes it means we are sending you back to a place before your last death. In fact you can go back to any of the previous times you have died as these are the easiest to change as we have already dabbled there before."

Harry had to admit it sounded like a great deal. With his future knowledge, he knew exactly where all of Tom's trinkets were and could quite easily get hold of them. If he played his cards right, by the end of second year Tom would be nothing more than a bad memory.

"Okay, so what do I do?" He asked with determination. Marcus smiled and slid over a contract along with a pen and said

"All you need to do is sign this form. It says you agree to the terms we discussed and that you will not tell anyone of your knowledge either about the future or of the afterlife. Once you sign it I'll have the guys from R and D come through to give you information to help with your new future."

Carefully, Harry read over the contract and saw that indeed it was exactly what Marcus said. With no hesitation, he signed the forms and handed them back to Marcus. Marcus smiled and picked up his phone and tapped out a number and waited a moment. When it picked up, he spoke into the phone with a grin

"Okay boys, its time and he has agreed."

A few minutes later, there was a knock at the door and two people Harry least expected walked through the door.

End Prologue.

A/N: This story is loosely based on the Retillia 28's challenge with a few of my own twists to it. I got sick of reading stories that either were unfinished or went in some quite odd places so decided to do my own. If you like it, great. If not, peace man and good luck on finding a story you do like.