Jamie was in bed, wrapped around a faded and worn teddy bear her father had given her for her fifth birthday. Dean pulled the purple comforter up to her shoulders and placed a kiss on her temple before brushing a stray curl behind her ear. Her hair was still damp from the shower and the smell of lilac filled him as he breathed in. She had been home for almost a week, the hospital released her 3 days after surgery and she had barely been out of bed since.
Her eyes stared ahead at the open door, unfocused. "You sure you don't want to come out and say hi to everyone? Bobby's leaving tonight." Jamie doesn't answer, she doesn't even move. Dean sighs softly, bending over to turn the lamp on low and close the door on his way out.
Sam and Bobby are on the couch while Nicole is rifling through the kitchen, putting together a quick meal before Bobby drives back home. Dean pulls a long neck from the fridge and quickly drains it before sitting down in a chair across from the couch. He doesn't wait for the question. "She's tired."
The pair on the couch nod, knowing better than to question anything about her state of mind. Sam leans forward, elbows resting on his knees. "Has she said anything?"
"Not a word. She doesn't even ask for help when getting in and out of the shower or bathroom. She almost fell the first night home because she doesn't want to talk to me."
"Is it possible that she uh, maybe she had a break."
"She's not crazy, Sam."
"I'm not saying she is. She's been through something huge and life changing. Maybe she just needs to see someone."
"No, she doesn't need to see someone. She just needs to work through this, I'll get her through this."
Bobby clears his throat. "How you feeling Sam?"
"Better. The first night was an adjustment, but then again, having your soul shoved back where it belongs isn't easy, is it?"
"And there don't seem to be any... side effects?"
"Not really, no. I've had some weird dreams and stuff like that, but I feel really good."
Dean nods towards the kitchen. "You planning on staying?"
A smile spreads over his lips as he looks over his shoulder. The soft voice of Nicole humming filters through the room. "I can't leave now. Not when I found the one I want to be with."
The foursome eat dinner; bacon cheeseburgers, loaded with toppings and homemade waffle fries with seasoned sour cream and a slaw on the side. They tried to keep the noise down while they talked, Jamie was probably sleeping after all. The pain killers doctor Shepard prescribed were pretty potent.
Bobby pulled everyone into a bone crushing hug, Nicole was the only one to get a kiss, on the cheek of course. "With cooking like that, I expect to see this boy put some weight on."
Nicole blushed as Bobby winked down at her. "I'll do what I can. Come down and visit, ok? Don't be a stranger."
A smile that brings out the wrinkles by his eyes, lights up his face. "You got it kid. Take care."
They watch him pile into the car and drive out before turning their attention to the kitchen. Nicole kicks them out because they're just tripping over each other. While they're nursing long necks on the couch and watching an old John Wayne movie, Nicole pours a cup of hot water with an Earl Grey tea bag darkening the water.
She slides into the bedroom, closing the door quietly behind her. The dim light next to the bed casts a halo like effect on the river of red hair hanging over the side of the bed. Setting the cup on the table, Nicole sits down at the small of Jamie's back, placing a hand on her shoulder. "I brought you some tea, honey." Jamie doesn't move but Nicole can see that her eyes are open, staring into the darkness. Nicole grabs a wide toothed comb from the table and starts maneuvering through the thick strands of Jamie's hair.
"You got us really worried about you, you're not eating. I know you don't know me and I can't possibly know what you went through but I'm here for you. You need to talk, rant, scream, cry or laugh; I'm here Jamie, we're all here. You've got a guy out there that would move Heaven and Earth to make sure nothing happened to you. Sam got his soul back, did Dean tell you? He's different than before but at the same time, he's not, if that makes any sense. I'm not complaining by any means, don't get me wrong, I love him and I wouldn't trade him for anything. You're probably tired, I'll let you be... just don't shut us out."
Nicole had weaved Jamie's hair into a braid that still touched the floor. She was greeted with two sets of eyes and she just shrugged. Sam and Nicole left a while later, not wanting to overstay their welcome for the night.
After locking up and powering off the set, Dean pads into the bedroom, not surprised that the lump under the blanket hasn't moved. He sheds his clothes and climbs into bed, resting his lips against Jamie's forehead. He moves as little as possible, knowing the amount of pain just one broken rib causes, let alone three. The light doesn't bother him anymore, he's actually grown accustomed to it.
With a hand on her hip, he's just about to fall asleep when her soft voice startles him. "I'm scared."
Her eyes are swimming in tears. "You don't have to be, baby."
"But I am. I watched as she killed people, Dean. I felt their blood on my skin and she loved it. She loved it when I screamed or cried or begged for her to stop. It just drove her to do more. The only thing that shut me up was Crowley diriving the tip of your demon blade into my thigh. That's when I passed out. Not when he rammed his knee into my stomach, or kicked me, or punched me, or burned me, but when he cut me; that's when I finally passed out. We all have a breaking point and now there is a demon out there that knows what mine is. I don't have to be scared? She's still out there and she knows how to make me break." Jamie's voice had cracked and wavered as tears fell, it even drove tears to Dean's eyes.
He wiped at her tears with his thumb and wrapped her gently in his arms. "I promise you, we will find Meg and we will kill her. Nothing will happen to you again, I won't let it."
Jamie knew he was telling the truth. If he could help it, no harm would come to her ever again. But their was a darkness in her that was rapidly swallowing all her hope and she was fighting not to let it swallow her whole. She felt weak and helpless and she didn't like it. Before she could speak, he beat her to the punch. "What do you say we take a vacation? Go someplace where there's a beach and it's sunny all day, we can sit with our toes in the sand and the drinks flow all day and night? Sam and Nicole can join us if you like."
Jamie nods, forcing a smile. She knew it wasn't going to be easy to find her way back to where she was before. She knew it wasn't going to be easy to find people she could trust again; Stacey betrayed her to a demon. Then again, she didn't need to trust anyone else, she had Dean, Sam and now Nicole. She hadn't actually met Nicole but there was something about her... She could do this.