A/N: I can't believe it's almost been a month since I've last updated! I really do apologize for the delay. I suppose I could list a bunch of excuses, but no one wants to read that sort of thing.

As always, I appreciate all of the reviews/follows/favorites! You folks are awesome, thank you! Also, if you have an idea you'd like written or you'd just like to chat, feel free to send me a PM!

Anyway, here is the long awaited elcor feature! I hope you all enjoy!


The Observation Deck

Produced by the Elcor Time Television, the 531st most popular channel on the Citadel!

Host: "Overly enthusiastic greeting: Welcome viewers to the Observation Deck. The most intense morning talk show on the air. I am your host Terlula. With evident fascination: Today our first topic of discussion focuses on the first human Spectre's relationship with a quarian admiral. With anticipation: Deltus why do you think the human chose to be with a quarian? "

Guest 1: "Amused: Perhaps the human has a taste for the exotic."

Guest 2: "Dismissive: That's not it at all. Explanatory: It is a political union, nothing more. Human history is full of arranged unions when two different peoples wish to form a more permanent alliance."

Guest 1: "Sarcastically: I'm sure they think about politics when they mate."

Guest 2: "Hyperbolic Statement: Of course, aliens think about 20 different things at once. It would not surprise me. With mild astonishment: I'm not sure how they manage. We elcor like to focus on one thought at a time. Indignantly: We are often looked down on for our methodical and careful nature. They call us slow."

Guest 1: "Concession: We are often seen this way by outsiders. Their hasty nature causes them to act rashly and say things they later regret. Contradictory: But I still disagree with your assertion that the human and the quarian mate for political reasons. Amused observation: They seem to enjoy public displays of affection far too much for it to be a mere political union."

Host: "Polite interjection: That is well said. They are not shy about relishing in their mutual admiration for each other."

Guest 2: "Disbelievingly: Their displays are merely for show. They have to be dramatic for other aliens to believe that it is a true bond. With evident bitterness: There is no way a human could truly love a quarian... or any non-human.

Host: "Slightly shocked: That is a bold statement. Curiously: What evidence do you have to support such a position?"

Guest 2: "Defensively: Anyone with an extranet account can figure out as much. Humans are visual creatures. They see us as ugly."

Guest 1: "With keen observation: This seems quite personal for you. Prying inquiry: Did a human break up with you?"

Guest 2: "Evasively: That is not your business."

Host: "Sincerely: There is no cause for shame. I've dated other species before."

Guest 2: "Reluctantly: I suppose there is no use denying it. With Shameful Bitterness: She left me for another human. I had assumed that we had something special..."

Heckler from the studio audience : "Rudely bombastic: Get over yourself."

Guest 2: "Incensed: Do not presume to judge my life."

Heckler: "Smugly: I just did."

Guest 2: "Angered: That is an inappropriate tone."

Heckler: "Instigation: Your mother was thin-framed."

Guest 2: "Enraged: Would you like to engage in a round of fisticuffs? I will easily defeat you."

Host: "Authoritative interjection: Gentlemen, please. Let us not resort to these violent outbursts. Calmly: We have gotten far off-topic."

Guest 1: "With tactful sensitivity: I regret that this human rejected you; however, I think that the human Spectre and the quarian Admiral do have a genuine relationship. The evidence is fairly clear."

Guest 2: "Dejectedly: What makes them so special? Why should their relationship work?"

Guest 1: "Gently: Do not compare yourself to them. Hopeful: You will find your match someday."

Guest 2: "With renewed spirits: I suppose you are correct. With sincere gratitude: I appreciate your comforting words."

Host: "With satisfaction: That is really touching. That is part of what we do here on The Observation Deck - we brighten the spirits of everyone around us."

Guest 1: "Cautious inquiry: Do you think you'll try another human?"

Guest 2: "Uncertain: I am uncertain. Humans are a lot of fun but are very energetic. With embarrassment: it is hard to keep up at times."

Heckler: "With intentional rudeness: Maybe that's why she left you."

Guest 2: "Furious: That does it. I am coming up there to teach you a lesson."

Heckler: "With inflated confidence: Take your best shot. I will clean the floor with you."

Host: "Hastily: We must take a short commercial break at this time. With anticipation: Next we will discuss the latest financial scandal: how one volus banker embezzled 2.4 Billion credits. Tritely: Do not go anywhere - we will be right back."