A/N: Trigger warning: murder, elements of emotional abuse.

Hater had decided that he did not enjoy handcuffs. Not. One. Bit.

Of course, the handcuffs weren't the most humiliating thing about the situation. Nor was the fact that they'd gotten their butts handed to them by a bunch of girls, although Hater really didn't care that they were girls; after all, his mother had conquered half the galaxy in her younger years, and even now she still ruled a sizable portion of it.

No, the most humiliating part of all of this was that it had only taken forty minutes for a crew of five to take out an army of three hundred.

He really should reconsider that training regimen he set up, because obviously something wasn't working here.

The doors to the Captain's quarters opened, revealing a large desk with a chair facing the giant window.

"Ma'am!"

The chair didn't move. "Leave the big one. Do whatever you like with the eyeball."

"Wh-What?!" Peepers cried as the largest of the women grinned, picking him up and tossing him over her shoulder. "S-Sir! Sir, help me!"

Hater gave him a sympathetic look as they shut the door, then turned back to the chair.

"Thatcher Visigoth."

Hater's eyes widened in shock. "Wh- How did you-?!"

"Please, your mom conquered half a galaxy, you really think I can't find you on the 'net?" She swiveled around in the chair, and Hater gasped.

The snow-white Star Nomad grinned at him, her blue eyes cold. "I have a proposition for you, Lord Hater." She flicked her finger in a 'come hither' motion, and Hater yelped as he was dragged forward by the handcuffs.

"M-Magic?!" He exclaimed after he slammed into the desk.

"It pays to have a wizard on your side. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Corsair. I'm sure you've met my brother."

Hater gave her a blank stare.

"Hm? Oh, perhaps you need a description. Orange fur, blue eyes, green hat, plays a banjo," she cleared her throat. "Talks with an accent like this one?" She added in a familiar country accent.

The overlord's eyes widened. "W… Wander?!"

"Ah, so you have met him! Mind you, I knew that you had, that little incident with the trophy got put online, but it's more fun to watch you figure it out."

Hater did his best to look indignant. "What… What do you want from me?"

"Weren't you listening, dearie? I have a proposal for you. You see, I haven't seen my brother in a very long time, and I miss him dearly. He seems to think that I want to kill him." She sighed. "Nothing could be farther from the truth, of course, but I can't convince him of that." She smiled, and suddenly Hater wished that he could fade away into oblivion. "So, I need you to get him here. I'll keep him locked up, and he'll be out of your hair forever." She gestured to the top of his head. "Metaphorically speaking of course."

"Wait, that's it? You just want me to capture Wander? And then he's out of my life?"

She rolled her eyes. "No, stupid. I've tried catching that idiot; it's impossible. I want you to help me lure him away from Sylvia and then catch him."

"And how do you expect me to do that?"

She grinned at him. "Well…"


"… And then he ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times."

Peepers swallowed nervously, forcing down a whimper. He attempted to scoot away, but found himself backing up into another crew member, yelping as they toppled over.

"I'm so s-sorry, m-miss!" Peepers exclaimed nervously, quickly helping her up. "I didn't see… you… there…"

The eyeball trailed off, staring at the tiny, doe-like alien, her green eyes wide and her face flushed an odd shade of purple.

"N-Najare! Metek al biyo tane ge!" She replied quickly, waving her hands out in front of her. "Tero… tero nimakeyak artul." She added, looking away bashfully.

Peepers blinked. "Uh…"

Behind them, the ladies snickered. "Aw!"

"Sweet enough to rot yer teeth, aren't they?"

The girl blushed even more. "K-Kitut grat marety ik! Ferur tero nonkek!"

"Okay, okay, geez! Sorry, Ty Nota."

Ty Nota scoffed. "Tero akinte mergi mek, Alanah."

The other woman blinked, then flushed. "Wha…" She screwed up her face, glaring menacingly. "Why you little-!"

Ty Nota screamed, diving behind Peepers as Alanah came at them, the knife lady barely holding her back.

"Settle down! Remember what the Captain said last time!"

"She's asking for an ass-whoopin'!"

"Could someone please explain what's going on?!"

"Attent-SHUN!"

Suddenly, all of the women halted, turning and facing the entrance. "Ma'am!"

Peepers sighed in relief when he saw Hater come inside, followed quickly by shock when he saw the white Star Nomad beside him.

"Oh my glorn…" He whispered, shaking in terror.

The woman smiled. "Ah, good. So at least one of you morons knows who I am."

"Hey! I know who you are!" Hater paused. "But… tell me anyway."

Peepers rolled his eyes. "Sir, that's Corsair the Ruthless!"

Hater looked at him blankly.

"She took over thirty solar systems in two weeks! And that's just the beginning! She's known as the most successful conqueror since… since your mother was young!"

"You flatter me, eyeball."

"Really? Her? But she's…" He pointed at her. "She's whatever Wander is!"

Alanah scoffed. "Dumbass. Star Nomads may be adorable, but they're all wicked to the core."

Hater stared at her. "What? But… Wander… Wander has to be the least wicked person I've ever met!"

"Yes, well, Wander… he's different. In fact, I'm fairly sure he and his twin sister aren't full-blood Star Nomads. Our birth parents weren't exactly happily married."

"Twin… sister?" The overlord's expression became horrified. "There's more than one of him?"

"Oh, no, darling. I assure you, Meander is quite dead." Corsair clapped her hands. "Right, then. Lord Hater has agreed to help us capture my darling little brother. Now, we've tracked him to a pit stop near the Nomadic Confederation's Supreme Court. We don't have much time."


Wander was bored.

Like, really bored. Reorganize your sock drawer bored.

Sylvia had gone to ask for directions, and had told him to stay put, but he was so bored.

He was also rather nervous. If all went according to plan, he'd be in court in less than an hour, recanting that testimony he made oh so long ago.

Wander knew, even then, when he was only four years old, that he should have told the truth, but how could he?

His big sister had done what she did to save them. Who was he to send her down the river?

But… things were different now.

He had to tell the truth. He owed Meander at least that much.

"Help! Help me!"

Wander swerved his head in the direction of the cry, glancing back briefly before standing up.

He'd only be a minute; Sylvia would never know he was gone.

The orange fellow started to run in the direction of the voice. "Hey! Where are you, I can help!"

"Over here! Please, hurry!" The voice called from a nearby alleyway. Wander turned into it, freezing when he saw that it was empty.

"What in tarnation…?" He scratched his head, looking around. "Where did they go?"

"Gotcha!"

Wander yelped as he was grabbed, handcuffs slapped on his wrists within seconds. "H-Hater?! What in the-?!"

The overlord shot a small green bolt of lightning at him, knocking him out.

"Huh. That was a lot easier than I thought it would be." He marvelled, pulling out the communicator that Corsair had given him.

"That was fast." Alanah commented when she picked up.

"I know, right?" He slung the nomad over his shoulder. "Pick us up."

In a flash, the overlord was beamed onto the ship, nomad still in tow.

"Follow me." Corsair said simply when she saw him, turning on her heel and leading him down a corridor.

"I still don't get what you needed me for. Your crewmen could've knocked him out prettily easily."

"I know. I didn't need you for that." She threw the doors open. "I need you for this."

Hater's jaw dropped.

The room was nearly filled by a giant cage with a door in the center. Within the cage was a brownstone mansion with a white door and a fountain in the front.

"What… What is it?"

"My brother's new home. I can't let him leave, but I can let him be comfortable. Put him on the ground there."

Hater did as she told him, placing Wander on the front lawn and backing out of the cage, closing the door as he exited.

"Now then," Corsair began, approaching a steel pole next to the prison. "This what I need you to do. You are aware that your mother is the most powerful magical being in the galaxy, correct?"

Hater scoffed, folding his arms indignantly. "Of course I do! What do you take me for, an idiot?"

"No comment. But in any case, you are your mother's son," She said, grabbing Hater's arm and dragging him over to the pole. "So it stands to reason that you've inherited some rather impressive magical powers. I need you to use them for me."

"I thought you said you had a wizard at your command?"

"I do, but there's only so much I can expect out of Ty Nota." She gestured at the rod. "If you'll just grab on to this and give it a good shock, then we'll be done here."

Hesitantly, the skeleton grabbed the steel pole, clenching it as he let his power flow down his arm and into the metal. In an instant, the entire cage lit up, glowing the same shade of bright green as Hater's magic.

"Perfect." Corsair said, grinning as she walked over to Wander, crouching down on her side of the cage. "Wander… wake up, Wander…"

The orange Star Nomad stirred, lifting himself up on his hands and knees. "Mornin' Sylvia… I had the weirdest dream… Hater captured me in an alley, and then I saw Cor… Cor…"

Wander's speech halted, his blue eyes wide and fearful as he stared at his sister. "No…" He whispered.

"Hello, dear little brother. Did you sleep well?"

The nomad moved to a sitting position, crawling away. "N… No. No, no, nononono! I… leave me alone! Let me go!"

"Oh, relax, Wander. You won't be joining our sister in the afterlife."

"Go away! Go away!" He begged, his eyes filling with tears.

"Now, now. Is that anyway to treat your sister?"

"You're not my sister! Not anymore!" Wander screamed, his voice filled with rage and terror.

Corsair looked shocked. "Wander! I'm hurt! How could you say something like that?!"

"How could you murder our sister?!"

"I've told you, Wander, I didn't kill Meander!"

"I watched you kill her!" He sobbed. "I watched you kill her, and now you're gonna kill me because I told the truth!"

Corsair rolled her eyes. "There's just no convincing this guy, is there?" She deadpanned to Hater. "I didn't kill her, Wander. And even if I had, there wasn't enough evidence to convict me, anyway." She sighed. "And I won't kill you, even though you so coldly betrayed me. You've always had that strange weakness, that good heart of yours. Oh, love, it's no fault of your own. It's not your fault that our dear Mother was a cheating harlot." She smiled at her brother sadly. "It's not your fault that you're a half-breed."

Wander turned to Hater, his eyes wild and desperate. "Hater, Hater, please,help me!"

Hater opened his mouth, too shocked to reply right away. "I…"

"Oh, Wander," Corsair started, shaking her head sadly. "When will you learn? The only person you can count on is you. And in any case, he hatesyou."

Wander whimpered, drawing his legs up to his face.

"But that's not surprising, is it? Look at you! You're so cheerful it's obnoxious, you wear that ratty old hat all the time, and let's not even get started on your naivety."

Hater swallowed a lump in his throat. He felt like he should say something.

No one, not even Wander deserved to be talked to like that.

The woman stood up. "But enough of that." She waved as she exited. "Say your goodbyes, Hater. You won't be seeing each other again."

She left, and they were alone.