Author's notes at the bottom. Gonna say it once up here and once again at the bottom just to be sure that you all understand: I don't condone underage drinking. I wasn't sure about putting this on FF because ratings so I rated it M because of reasons so sorry my little middle school babies. Pure nonsensical nonsense.


"You've got to be kidding me."

Cyborg's human eye twinkled. "Nope. We're dead serious, Rae. The party was nice and all, but Robin would never approve of something like this, and Starfire, well..."

"Oh God, I don't wanna think about it. Mustard is a safer favorite drink for Star."

"This is a new low for you two."

"Raven, don't even try to tell me you're not a little bit curious," replied Beast Boy, waggling his eyebrows suggestively and earning himself a sharp jab just below his ribcage.

"About the effects of overconsumption of alcohol?" Raven frowned down at the bottle of vodka and three shot glasses resting on Cyborg's desk, knowing full well that the deep purple glass was meant for her. Even though her boys would have undoubtedly been willing to go this one alone, they'd attempted to include her this time around. The gesture might have been sweet if it weren't so idiotic. "No, I can't say that I am."

Beast Boy's bottom lip protruded and quivered dangerously. "But Raeeeee," he whined, "it's my birthday."

"Your eighteenth birthday," she reminded him sharply. "Not your twenty-first. And you shouldn't be encouraging him," Raven continued, rounding on Cyborg in a heartbeat. "I thought you of all people would—"

Cyborg waved the rest of her sentence away as though batting at a bothersome fly. "The boy's old enough to do what he wants. So are you, Rae. Neither one of us is going to make you do anything."

"Even though it is my birthday," Beast Boy pouted.

Raven scowled. "Peer pressure, Beast Boy," she drawled.

Cyborg rolled his eyes dramatically. "Oh no, because Raven would totally cave in to peer pressure!" Seeing a deathly cold glare etched into her features, Cyborg rested a hand on her shoulder. "Look, we figured you probably wouldn't want anything to do with this, but we got you the shot glass anyway because we wanted to be clear that...well, you're invited. If you want to be."

"Three Musketeers, baby!" Beast Boy cried, laughing. "All for one and one bottle of vodka for all!"

Raven crossed her arms in front of her chest. "I'm touched."

"Neither of us will make you drink," said Cyborg seriously, and Raven took comfort in the fact that she knew he meant it. "But we want your company."

Beast Boy's wry smile stretched across the full length of his face. "At least watch us do it and give us a few good eye rolls. That's how we know we're doing something fun."

"Don't forget the sarcastic comments."

"Those too. Definitely give us those. Some thrown objects wouldn't hurt, either."

"Thrown objects are very important. You're probably going to want a couple of good sturdy ones on tap; Beast Boy's never had alcohol before, and he's affectionate enough on his own, he might get a little handsy..."

"DUDE, cut it OUT!"

"Azar, fine, if it will shut you idiots up," Raven sighed, half exasperated and half amused.

Beast Boy and Cyborg looked at each other, flashed their teeth, and took Raven into their arms more swiftly than she could get away. "No hugs!" she growled, and as quickly as it began, the embrace ended. Already regretting this, she thought, watching them take the bottle and fill the green and blue shot glasses. Cyborg waited a moment—probably giving me time to decide—before setting down the bottle, leaving the purple glass conspicuously empty.

"Wish me luck, Rae-Rae," Beast Boy said casually with a wink as he raised the glass. His nervousness was rolling off of him in waves, but Raven chose not to mention it. Cyborg, on the other hand, held his glass comfortably; he'd turned twenty-one long ago, and Raven had already stood by his side during his "learning to drink" stage, equipped with healing spells for the mornings after until he learned how to avoid hangovers on his own.

"Ready, Beast Boy?" Brotherly concern danced with Cyborg's overpowering feelings of joy.

"Dude! I was born ready."

"Okay..." The cybernetic teen turned to the little bird seated beside them. "Will you do the honors, Rae?"

The nervousness hadn't let up, but Beast Boy was still bouncing on his toes in anticipation. Raven opened her mouth, but before she could speak...

"Where's the eye roll?! You promised."

Raven sighed deeply, heavily, making sure she kept the facade of disinterest alive, before finally rolling her eyes and muttering, "Bottoms up."

The two best friends gently clinked their glasses together and drank. Cyborg's shot was down his throat in a second, the empty glass now resting on the desk once more. Beast Boy, on the other hand, grimaced, then swallowed (obviously trying not to gag), then stuck his tongue out and shook his head, casting the glass away.

Cyborg's laughter filled the small room. "BB, you're not supposed to let it sit in your mouth. It ain't mouthwash..." He paused for a moment as Beast Boy began to cough. A fleeting sense of pity swept through Raven's bones. "Don't try to drink it this time. Don't even really let it hit your tongue. Just knock it back and swallow."

"I don't know if I can do that again, dude," Beast Boy wheezed. "That was nasty!"

"You'll be fine." Cyborg's steady hands rested on Beast Boy's shoulders, and Raven couldn't stop the tiniest of smiles from gracing her lips. Even when the situation was less than admirable, Cyborg's brotherly affection for his little grass stain was touching. He reached for the bottle and poured two more shots, one for each of them. Each boy picked up his glass. "Ready?"

Beast Boy didn't look ready, but he nodded.

While the boys were preoccupied with their own shots, Raven inched the bottle and glass closer to her with her powers. She would have denied it to her deathbed, but she was curious, in a very typical, disappointing, nineteen-year-old kind of way. Raven had hoped that she was better than that.

If she started to drink, she would let her guard down. That much she knew for sure. The boys would make fun of her. Beast Boy was coughing again, and Cyborg was laughing. If they can be torn away from making fun of each other. She might lose control. That scared her most. Nevertheless, a shadowy energy untwisted the cap to the bottle.

"Dude, is she gonna..."

"Sssssshhhhh."

But when she looked up, neither boy was looking at her, instead discussing nothing at all rather animatedly. Giving her space. Respecting her.

If there were any two people she'd want to try drinking with, Raven had to admit that it would be them. Slowly and carefully, she poured her first shot.


"Never have I ever...oh, I've got one! Never have I ever lived in Africa!"

Raven and Cyborg looked at each other, each with two fingers raised, and then glanced at Beast Boy's lone raised finger. Raven bit her lip, but Cyborg instantly burst into uncontrollable laughter. "What are you waiting for? Drink, BB."

"What? Nu-uh! I..."

"You're so drunk you started playing the game backwards," Cyborg continued, lazily wiping a tear from his eye. His sprawled out posture was the embodiment of pure relaxation. Raven knew already that Cyborg tended to just mellow out when he drank; tonight was no exception. "You're supposed to say things that other people have done and you haven't done, not the other way around."

Beast Boy paused for an unusually long time, until finally Raven saw the flicker of understanding gleam in his eyes. "Damnit," he cursed. "Whatever. Fine. Fine fine fine, I'll drink." The larger cup next to his knee was filled up high with a combination of vodka and cranberry juice; he took a long swig from it, not noticing that some of it was dribbling down his chin until he'd set the glass down. Wiping his face sloppily, Beast Boy looked to Cyborg. "Pick a card, dude."

Cyborg pulled a card from the pile, suddenly grinning wickedly in Raven's direction. "Hot seat!" he called, laying the jack down for both of them to see. "Your turn to answer, Rae."

"No."

"I'll go easy on you, though I can't promise Beast Boy will do the same."

"I said no."

"Raven..."

"Fine," she replied. In truth, she didn't mind all that much just now, but she knew that normally she would, and tried to respond appropriately. Raven wasn't entirely sure her newfound comfort was a good thing. "One question each."

Cyborg raised an eyebrow at her sudden acceptance of the situation, but was too far gone to wait for her to change her mind again. "Okay. What's your favorite memory from your time on Earth?"

Raven hesitated before answering. She'd focused so long on the bad memories that she forgot sometimes that she had good ones. "My surprise birthday party," she said finally, quietly, and Cyborg smiled warmly. "Your turn, Beast Boy. Make it quick."

Beast Boy was far too excited. Before Raven had time to comment, he said, "If you were forced to sleep with someone in this tower, who would you choose?"

Cyborg's head whipped around in the blink of an eye as he considered Beast Boy with one wide human eye. Raven was sure she hadn't heard correctly; everything was a little quieter since she started drinking, and Beast Boy would never be so stupid as to ask what she thought he'd asked. "What?"

To his credit, Beast Boy didn't flinch, though he did stifle a laugh poorly. "If you had to sleep with someone in this tower, who would you sleep with?"

Raven grimaced; the questions were meant to embarrass, but this was too much. "Can I choose death?"

"No can do, Rae. Sorry," replied Cyborg. The smile on his face held no signs of an apology; he knew her answer to this question already.

"You can pick me, Rae, it's all right." It took Raven a moment to look to Beast Boy, who was leaning in far too closely. So close that she could smell the alcohol on his breath. "I promise I won't bite...harder than you want me to."

Merciful Azar. "Starfire," Raven said hastily, pushing Beast Boy away and taking a small sip of her drink.

Both boys froze. "Starfire?"

Cyborg was giving her a look that could only be described as triumphant disappointment—there was no way he'd expected her to tell the truth, but the fact that she hadn't told him everything he needed to know. Beast Boy, however, instantly lit up, straightening so quickly that he fell backwards. "Dude, that's even better!" he cried too loudly as he picked himself back up. "Promise to give us all the dirty details?"

"Cross my heart," Raven replied, utterly deadpan. Having had enough, she picked up the cards and stowed them in one of Cyborg's drawers. "I'm done with this game."

Beast Boy rolled his eyes playfully, and Cyborg smirked. "Whatever you say, little lady," Cyborg muttered.

The room was getting very warm, she realized, or perhaps it was just her? Not having the energy to think about it, Raven quickly unclasped her cloak and cast it aside, not fully registering what she'd done for another moment or two. When she began drinking, she'd taken two shots, in fairly rapid succession so as to get it over with...a rookie mistake, she realized. Instead of coming on slowly, the cloud around her senses enveloped her fully and immediately twenty minutes later, and had grown stronger over the course of the Kings game they'd played.

Beast Boy couldn't stop laughing. He usually wasn't too hard to entertain, but three shots and half a mixed drink later, seemingly everything that happened was a cause for joy or a fit of giggles. At the sight of Raven sans cloak, he wolf-whistled and, unsurprisingly, began to laugh. "Rae-Rae's letting her hair dooooown, happy birthday to meeeeeee! Cy, Cy Cy Cy, you're seeing this, right?"

"I'm just hot," Raven complained, unceremoniously tossing a pillow and thankfully hitting her target square in the face moments before his hands finally went up in defense.

"Are you?" Cyborg's smile was far too wide. "Feeling confident, little lady, or is that the vodka talking?"

Raven rolled her eyes and sat down, her head suddenly feeling a little lighter. She wasn't sure if the feeling was a head rush from the sudden drop into her chair or from the giddy feelings of her companions seeping into her own consciousness. Probably both. "Quiet, you idiot. You know what I meant."

The bottle, cranberry juice, and three shot glasses had mysteriously disappeared from Cyborg's desk, but Raven wasn't too concerned about it. She was reasonably sure that Cyborg had chosen to cut all three of them off after preparing his own sixth drink, despite Beast Boy's protests that he was "totally, seriously fine dude, dude, totally fine."

Beast Boy scooted over from his space on the floor to the empty space at Raven's feet. Shifting quickly into cat form, he leapt up onto the arm of her chair, and, weaving to and fro, found himself in her lap. He nuzzled up against her thigh, apparently preparing for sleep. Though she was only somewhat alarmed, Raven felt her powers act without her say-so, reaching for any nearby object. She felt as though she were outside herself all of a sudden, dizzy and light. Apparently her powers and alcohol did not mix well.

"Nope, don't think so, buddy," Cyborg said, giving each consonant an unreasonable amount of attention as he lifted Beast Boy but plopped him rather indelicately onto the floor. After a moment or two, Raven relaxed. "I like you living, grass stain."

"Raven doesn't mind," Beast Boy argued after shifting back, taking a small pillow and snuggling up against Cyborg's knee instead. "She just pretends to mime. Mind." He'd gotten himself giggling again. "Talking is hard. Did you know that talking is hard?"

Cyborg spluttered and chuckled at the same time. "Yes."

"Whydidn't you tellme?" Beast Boy whined, his words finally beginning to link together. Fortunately, the worst of his drunkenness was also bringing on sleep. As Cyborg continued to laugh, Beast Boy allowed his eyes to close.

Raven felt her own eyelids drooping and contemplated teleporting herself to her own bed—neither she nor Beast Boy had expected to get so tired so quickly—but stopped when she looked back at Cyborg and Beast Boy. Cyborg was mumbling something about plugging himself in tomorrow morning, unwilling to move the drooling, snoring changeling from his lap.

For the first time in her life, Raven didn't think about what she was doing; whether it was the fog or herself, she didn't know. Pillow in hand, she got up from her own chair, set the pillow against Cyborg's metal frame, ruffled Beast Boy's hair awkwardly, and curled up against them both. She nearly allowed her eyes to close then, but she glanced at Cyborg's shocked expression and tried through her haze to convey a message of certain death if he ever brought this up in the future.

When she curled back up against him, Raven didn't see Cyborg's smile. She felt it.

Or was that the euphoria still lingering in her system?


Once you start playing "Never Have I Ever" backwards, you are too drunk. Learned this one the hard way.

I don't condone underage drinking, even if I just wrote it. Writing something happening is not the same as supporting it. I don't want to hear your under 21 drinking stories, because you shouldn't have any. Just putting that out there. :)

Also! Drunkenness in fanfiction is often written by people who have never been drunk before (hint: you little young babies) Drinking doesn't change your character. I've seen many a drunk fic where a very reserved character like Raven is suddenly very open and silly; alcohol just doesn't do that. It's true that you aren't as inhibited, but when you have inhibitions as powerful as Raven's, those types of traits stay with you. A shy or socially anxious person, for example, will most likely not suddenly start dancing on tables, but they might be a little bit more receptive to social interaction than they would normally. People who drink and suddenly become totally crazy are often (but not always) exaggerating their own level of drunkenness. This is why none of my Titans are completely OOC, just a little bit. Alcohol does not equal OOC fuel.

(Hey! I didn't write this on a Wednesday but I ACCIDENTALLY FOLLOWED MY ONESHOT WEDNESDAY RULE)