Author Notes: Happy Halloween to everyone, who celebrates it!^^
This story is part of my "World" series. If you haven`t read them, yet, I suggest that you do it, before you start on that story. Otherwise certain parts of this OS won`t make much sense to you.
Appreciation: Special thanks to YenGirl.*hugs* Although she has been very busy with her own stories, YenGirl has still found the time to beta my OS.*smiles*Thank you, dear.*big hug*
Merging our Worlds
Jack o'lanterns which made faces at students as they passed them by.
Flying candles which changed the color of their flame every few seconds.
Hooting ghosts which floated through the Great Hall.
And of course, mountains of sweets on each House table.
A small smile ghosted around Harry's lips as he watched Ron almost running to the Gryffindor table to get his favorite sweets. He understood very well why his best mate was so crazy about the various chocolates and confectioneries.
After all, Ron had six siblings, so he probably had never gotten so many sweets at all his Halloween celebrations combined, compared to what he could now get each year at Hogwarts.
Harry frowned. Well, he had never gotten so many sweets at Halloween either before he came to Hogwarts. None at all, to be precise.
Dudley had always been allowed to go hunting for sweets in the neighborhood and he always came back with a whole bagful. Harry suspected it was because their neighbors had been afraid of the blond's pranks even back then.
Of course Harry had been envious whenever he saw his cousin stuff his mouth each Halloween. He had never been even allowed to touch any of Dudley's sweets... but he still hadn't felt the urge to eat as much as possible during the past Halloweens he had spent at Hogwarts.
Maybe it was because there had always been something else, which kept him worrying. The troll in his first year, the speculations about the chamber of secrets in his second year, his godfather in his third year, the Triwizard Tournament in the year after that, and... Fred and George's newest creation, last year.
If someone had told him that he would have gotten close to Severus because of a Weasley twins invention, he would have thought them mad, but now...
Looking up at the head table, he saw that the Potions Master hadn't appeared for dinner yet. It didn't matter. If Harry didn't get to see him, he would just take his Invisibility Cloak after curfew and go down to the dungeons.
After all, today was the anniversary of the first time he had learned of Severus' feelings towards him and he had already thought of some ideas of how they could celebrate this special day. Maybe he could even seduce Severus into doing more than just kisses and touches... Although those touches had recently been on naked skin a few times, Harry really wanted to feel more of the Potions Master, to...
The young Gryffindor slowly turned around, only to come face to face with a smirking Draco Malfoy. He hadn't even noticed that he had stopped in the middle of the doorway of the Great Hall, in order to follow his trace of thoughts.
He decided to just ignore Malfoy and enjoy his dinner with his classmates when that hated voice sounded again.
"I wonder how you can do this."
"Make sense, Malfoy!"
If possible, the smirk of the young Slytherin grew even wider.
"I mean, how you can go through this day, smiling and laughing with your friends, when your parents had sacrificed themselves on this date?"
Harry stared at him, his heart starting to beat faster.
"Of course, it might be because you have finally understood that your arrogant father and your mudblood mother aren't worth grieving for."
Before Harry knew what he was doing, he found his wand drawn and aimed at the still smirking Slytherin.
"How dare you speak -"
"That is quite enough, Mr. Potter."
That familiar, silky voice would normally reach Harry no matter how angry or upset he was, but right now, all he could just think of was hexing Malfoy into tomorrow.
"You son of a -"
A hand grabbed his wrist and forced his right arm down, until his wand was aiming at the floor of the Hall.
"Whatever he said or did, calm down, Harry."
The words were whispered to him before Severus continued speaking in his normal voice.
"Since you seem to think that you can just disturb a celebration which your other schoolfellows enjoy, you certainly won't mind having a detention with me, Mr. Potter! I will see you in one hour!"
Breathing deeply, Harry watched Severus striding towards the head table, his robes billowing behind him. He should be happy, he reasoned. He now had a valid reason to go down to the dungeons to see Severus... and the Potions Master obviously also wanted to see him as well.
It was perfect... but Harry could still hear Malfoy's hateful words echoing in his head over and over as he made for the Gryffindor table. Looking at the young Slytherin who was now happily eating sweets while flirting with Parkinson, he was very sure the blond had only wanted to get him into trouble... but his words had provoked more than just that.
Sighing, Harry sat down next to Ron and prepared to sit out the next hour until his date with Severus. He hoped that Halloween would end as fast as possible.
Severus allowed himself a contented smile as he took a look at his work - red bedsheets and pillows on the bed, and two dozen long lasting candles, which lit the room with their gentle light.
All right, the decorations themselves weren't much, but Severus hadn't been able to bring himself to spread blossoms on the floor or spell the ceiling to show a thousand stars. That would be overdoing it. Harry would probably laugh at him if he ever decided on such sappy decorations.
Severus could already feel a blush rising in his cheeks whenever he tried imagining Harry's reaction to this romantic setting. He was very sure he hadn't misinterpreted Harry's kisses and the shy passion in those green eyes and how the young man obviously wanted to touch every part of his body.
Nevertheless, Severus had not allowed himself to be carried away and go all the way with Harry. Not because he didn't want to, but...Severus shook his head. No more thinking about his insecurities and asking "what if" questions, not when Harry would arrive in about five minutes.
Closing the door to his bedroom, he decided to wait for his young lover in the living-room. He leaned against the frame of the fireplace and let his mind wander. The argument between Harry and Draco had come at the right time. No one would ask twice if they saw Harry returning to the Gryffindor Tower in the early hours of tomorrow morning, after that incident in the Great Hall.
If Harry was a Slytherin, Severus was inclined to think that he did that on purpose, but if he had read the situation correctly, it had been Draco provoking Harry and not the other way around.
Severus frowned slightly, curious to know what his young Snake had done to get such a strong reaction from Harry. He dismissed the question with a wave of his hand when a knock sounded at his door.
Crossing the room, he opened the door and greeted Harry.
Harry only managed a small smile when he saw Severus. It wasn't that he wasn't happy to see Severus again and to be able to spend some time in private with him.
No, it was just...Harry shook his head. He should stop thinking about Malfoy's stupid words. The git had only wanted to upset him and get him into trouble, there wasn't a deeper meaning behind his words.
Still, Harry couldn't stop thinking of his parents. It was silly since he had never thought of the late Potters for longer than an hour. At least, not for many years.
The Dursleys had never allowed him to ask questions about his parents. Harry hadn't even known how they looked like, until he saw them in the Mirror of Erised, and he hadn't even recognized them at first. Before Hermione had shown him A History of Hogwarts he hadn't even known on which date his parents had died.
Until now, he still didn't know much about them, only the few stories people told him over and over again. This was why he couldn't grieve over them like Malfoy had accused him of, because he didn't know what he should grieve for. He couldn't remember his parents, couldn't remember having a family and therefore he didn't really know what he had lost. Yet somehow, he felt like he should still... hold the memory of his parents in higher regard than he had done so far.
Lost in thought, Harry only noticed that he had been following Severus through his quarters when the different lighting registered. They weren't in the living-room anymore, but in the bedroom.
Green eyes widened as they took in the changes - red covers, red pillows and lots of lit candles! It all looked beautiful!
Harry turned to stare at Severus in wonder. He knew how much he meant to the Potions Master, ever since he noticed that Severus always wore the lion shaped pendant he had given him on Valentine's Day. He was also aware that Severus had become more confident each time they kissed and touched each other, although he still suspected Severus didn't think highly of his sexy body.
Nevertheless, he had never suspected that the Potions Master could be so...romantic, or that that he would take the initiative to bring them even closer tonight. Harry had a sudden lump in his throat.
He gulped. This was the moment he had waited for ever since Valentine's Day, when he had first caught a glimpse of Severus' naked body. He had been hoping the day would come when Severus would grant him that privilege again. In fact, every kiss and caress they had exchanged since then had left Harry craving for more.
Right now, he should be ecstatic and kissing Severus senseless already, but... he couldn't. He just didn't know how he should feel.
On the one hand, his heart was jumping at the chance to finally become one with Severus, but on the other, it felt wrong to be happy at Halloween, wrong to feel loved on the anniversary of the day of his parents' death.
Harry shook his head as Severus moved to embrace him.
"I'm sorry," he managed to choke out. "I can't. I just can't, Severus!"
Stifling a sob, he turned his head away and didn't see the dark eyes widen and fill with shock.
Severus gasped. Such simple words, but they hurt like hell.
He remembered the many times he had lain at the feet of the Dark Lord, whimpering and screaming as he was cursed over and over again, punished for an offense of some sort... or just because Voldemort was bored and wanted to have fun.
Severus had never imagined that anything could hurt more than that. What could be worse than feeling like all your nerve ends were set on fire and being signaled to your brain at once, while hearing the cold laughter of the dark wizard, whose Mark he wore?
Nothing. Not even the rejection of his former, brief affairs or their ugly words had been able to hurt him like the Cruciatus curse. His heart had only clenched inside his chest each time he had been abandoned before, but now... it was so much worse. It didn't feel like being cursed by the Dark Lord at all and yet it was a thousand times more painful.
Severus blinked hard as tears started burning in his eyes. He should have known it would end like this. Harry wasn't meant for him and it was already a miracle Severus had been allowed at his side for one year.
One year, in which he had allowed himself to fall deeper in love with Harry than ever before.
One year, which had been filled with hope instead of bitterness and hopelessness.
One year... and that was all Severus was going to get.
He should have expected something like this. Someone like himself could never hope for someone as pure and wonderful as Harry was.
Severus closed his eyes against the burning sensation, but he couldn't do anything about the tearing pain in his chest. It felt like someone had cut open his chest with Sectumsempra and then stabbed at his beating heart with the fang of a basilisk.
The poison was slowly and painfully killing him, eating away all hope and light, until there was nothing left but darkness again. The same darkness and pain which had been Severus' companions for almost all his life.
A sob escaped past his lips. He tried to suppress it so that he wouldn't make it even harder on Harry to leave him. He didn't want to be a burden for this bright young man. Harry still had his whole future ahead of him and it was only understandable that he didn't want to share it with an old, mean and ugly man like his Potions Professor.
Scalding tears ran down Severus' cheeks as he let his arms fall away from Harry, allowing him to go free.
The sob tore Harry away from his dark thoughts. Blinking slowly, he turned his head and looked up at the Potions Master
The word, mingled with a gasp, fell from Harry's lips in shock. Even though the long black hair obscured part of Severus' face as he bowed his head, Harry could see tears streaming down those pale cheeks and falling onto the dark robes, leaving wet traces.
"Severus," Harry repeated softly. He touched the man's shoulder with one trembling hand, noting how Severus had clenched his fists at his sides.
Black orbs sprang open and a tearful gaze focused on Harry.
"You... can go... I won't... hold you... back."
Harry shook his head, not understanding what Severus was talking about.
Why should he leave?
What had happened in the last few seconds, in which he had paid more attention to his thoughts than to Severus?
"You don't... have to force... yourself... I understand that you want... someone else and not... me."
Again, Harry shook his head in bewilderment. How did Severus come to the conclusion that he didn't want him anymore?
Harry was just about to ask that question when his eyes fell on the decorations again and realization hit him. Severus had planned all this in order to spend a very special night with him, and he... he had just told Severus that he didn't want to!
Damn Malfoy... and damn his own worrying! He should have told Severus what was wrong instead of trying to reason out everything with himself. He was such an idiot and now he had hurt Severus, because of his stupidity.
Fighting back tears himself, Harry decided to stop thinking so much and just go with his instincts. Even if Severus hexed him for it, that was a risk Harry was willing to take. Closing the gap between them, he wrapped his arms around the still sobbing Potions Master and breathed a light kiss onto his lips.
"Don't, Harry..." Severus turned his head away. "You don't have... to force..."
"I'm not forcing myself," Harry insisted. "I was an idiot! I listened to what Malfoy said."
He forced himself to continue despite the lump in his throat when dark orbs looked warily at him.
"It's Halloween and it's... the anniversary of the death of my parents. I have never thought of them... on this day before. I... just don't know..." Harry took a deep breath, before he asked the question, which was upsetting him so much.
"Am I allowed to be happy today?"
Severus drew a shuddering breath. His heart started to beat hopefully in his chest again as he listened to Harry's explanations.
Could it really be that the young man didn't want to leave him?
Carefully, Severus searched the green eyes with his own, but the only things he found there were honesty and desperation. He was afraid to start hoping again, but he was willing to grasp at straws as long as possible if there was still a tiny chance to be with Harry.
"Are... you sure?"
When green eyes blinked up at him, Severus realized that his question didn't answer Harry's former one so he was forced to elaborate.
"Are you... sure that you... still want to be with me?"
"Yes, of course, Severus."
The way in which Harry snuggled against him was almost too much for Severus, but he forced his emotions down. His trembling arms closed around the young man again and held him tightly.
No words were uttered. They stayed like that in perfect silence until Severus finally remembered the question which Harry had brought up.
"How did you come to the silly conclusion that you aren't allowed to be happy at Halloween?"
He was so stupid!
Harry didn't know how many times he had already repeated that sentence in his mind. He felt like a little boy who didn't know anything about how to behave in certain situations and who had to be lectured about his mistakes by an adult.
All right, Severus hadn't told him off or even made a comment about Gryffindors who were stuck at the level of primates. He had only listened to Harry's explanations, starting from Malfoy's offensive words to the point where Harry had come to the conclusion that he wasn't worthy of the memory of his parents, because he had never really paid them the honor he should have.
After that, Severus had told him to wait for him on the couch before vanishing into one of his rooms. But that had been half an hour ago...
Harry was starting to think that Severus wasn't going to come out. After all, he had hurt the man badly when he turned away from him. His throat tightened again at the memory of these tearful black eyes, the sadness in them almost tearing his heart apart.
Severus now knew that everything had only been a misunderstanding, but that didn't mean that he would forgive him anytime soon.
Harry clenched and unclenched his fists nervously in his lap. If he could turn back the time, he would do that right away. He would just ignore Malfoy's words and enjoy a very special night with Severus later and he would...
Harry shook his head. There was no point in speculating about things which would never happen. He just had to go with his decisions and make the best of them, even if he had to beg Severus on his knees to... for whatever. He was just about to stand up and go look for him when the door opened and Severus entered the room, holding a small casket in his hands.
Harry watched as the Potions Master came over to the couch and sat down next to him.
He was so stupid!
Severus shook his head inwardly. Last year, he had lit a candle on the anniversary of Lily's death, but this year he had forgotten all about it. Perhaps it was because he had a happier anniversary to celebrate on this same day, a year after Harry knew of his feelings towards him, but that was no excuse for forgetting that Harry was still Lily's son and might want to grieve for her.
In his defense, Severus had never seen Harry grieve for his parents at Halloween and he had been watching the boy ever since he had entered Hogwarts. At first, it was because of his parentage and because he had promised Albus to keep him safe, but later, it was because he had fallen in love with the boy... no, young man.
Severus was sure he would have noticed it if Harry had been upset at Halloween, but he still blamed himself for not at least thinking of the possibility that Harry might not be in the mood for romantic activities on this day. Nevertheless, he was also very much relieved that Harry still wanted him and that his rejection was only towards the quandary of being happy at Halloween.
Harry was happy... with him, the most hated teacher of Hogwarts!
A slight but fond smile ghosted around Severus' lips as he went through yet another drawer and finally found what he had been looking for. It was a very small casket, hidden away for many years, but he was sure it would still work.
Taking a deep breath, he went back to the living room and sat next to Harry before placing the casket on the table in front of them.
Curious green eyes looked at the box and then at him. Severus took heart in that gaze, which held as much insecurity as he felt right now, and opened the lid.
Harry blinked at the tiny vase that lay in the casket, no bigger than his thumb. He stared up at Severus. He doubted that the Potions Master wanted to pull his leg, but he still couldn't see what such a... thing had to do with everything that had happened today.
"It's a portkey."
Harry gasped at that word and shrank back a bit from the innocent looking vase. Since the Triwizard Tournament, he didn't have much faith in this particular magical object.
"I created it myself, a few weeks after Lily's... after the death of your parents."
The sadness in Severus' voice called to Harry, making him lean closer to the Potions Master. He knew that Severus hadn't been able to stand James Potter, but that he had been very fond of Lily. Her death had most likely been harder for him to take than for Harry, who couldn't remember anything about his parents... at least not the happy moments.
Again, Harry recalled the last seconds of his mother when she had begged Voldemort for mercy.
"She died for me," Harry murmured. Long fingers intertwined themselves with his, offering silent comfort.
"And I can't even remember her," he continued, his voice cracking at the end as he fought against the lump in his throat.
"I can show you my memories of her if you like."
Surprised, Harry blinked at Severus who nodded at him.
"I'm sorry I never came up with that idea before and that I only thought of this portkey now."
Harry's gaze fell on the vase again and he frowned.
"To the graveyard in Godric's Hollow." Severus took a deep breath before continuing, "I have never been brave enough to visit... her grave, but if you want to..."
Harry started to shake his head and then he stopped. He was so confused right now that he didn't know what he wanted, but something told him he should go and that it was the right thing to do.
"Yes, let's go pay a visit."
It was cold.
Harry wrapped his cloak tighter around himself as he looked around. They were at the entrance of a graveyard. The gate behind them was closed and padlocked due to the late hour but the portkey had brought them past that barrier.
Harry watched as Severus closed the last button of his cloak, looking as lost as he felt. He gulped. Aunt Petunia had never taken him to a graveyard before, which he supposed was a good thing since he might have had to clean up a distant relative's grave, so this was his first visit to such a place.
The graveyard was neatly laid out with small paths between the rows of tombstones and willow trees for visitors to walk. The sound of leave rustling softly in the October breeze created a peaceful yet melancholic atmosphere.
"So... where is...it?"
"I have never been here before, but Albus described the location to me once. I think I know where to look."
Not trusting his voice anymore, Harry just nodded and followed Severus along the paths. Their footsteps sounded inappropriately loud to his ears as the sand crunched beneath their shoes. He had never imagined he would visit his parents' graves like this, late at night and creeping around the graveyard like... a fugitive.
To tell the truth, Harry had never imagined visiting this place at all. Did that make him a bad son then?
His thoughts stopped abruptly when Severus came to a halt. Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to step up next to him.
The gravestone in front of them was made of white marble and seemed to glow in the darkness of the night. Beneath it lay his parents inside the earth, already nothing more than hair and bones, not knowing their only son had finally come to pay his respects.
Harry took a deep breath and heard Severus doing the same next to him. That reminded him of something - Severus had known both his parents, had loved Lily and hated James and...
Following his instincts once again, Harry intertwined his fingers with Severus' and felt dark orbs turn to him in surprise.
Severus hated graveyards. Some people had told him that they felt a sense of peace while standing at the grave of their loved ones, and that they felt close to the departed when they touched their tombstones and remembered those who lay buried there.
Severus couldn't understand how they could feel like that when he looked around at the tombstones, standing like silent guardians behind the graves. Some were formed like angels or huge crosses; others were just oval stones with inscriptions.
It seemed such a dreary place. How could anyone find peace here?
Not even the bouquets of flowers or candles left on some of the graves could distract him from the fact that the people who lay here for eternity were dead. They were gone for good and nothing would ever bring them back.
No amount of heartbroken tears or fake smiles or impassioned vows. Nothing.
Severus had felt that way ever since his mother's funeral. He had known then that he would never see her again, and although they had never been close, that knowledge had still hurt him. And now, he was standing in front of the grave of the only friend he had ever made during his childhood. Maybe it had been a mistake to come here, but no… he had done it for Harry.
Black orbs flicked to the young Gryffindor walking quietly beside him. He didn't know how Harry would react to seeing the grave of his parents, but it might help him to get rid of his feelings of guilt.
Severus stopped when he found the grave, guided by Albus' detailed description in the past. He swallowed hard as he looked at the tombstone with the two names and the two sets of dates of birth and death on it.
Lily had died so young. Her whole life had been ahead of her and she... would have been happy with Potter. He had died young too.
Severus sighed inwardly. Yes, he had to admit that James Potter would have made her happy and Harry... would he still be so close to their son if the late Potters were still alive?
Severus almost cursed himself for even thinking of something like that. So selfish of him! He should be wishing that Harry had his parents with him, instead of...
Cold fingers intertwined with his, distracting him. He turned his head to see a sad smile ghosting around Harry's lips.
"It feels so final to stand at their grave."
Severus nodded, but didn't say anything. He felt that Harry needed some time to sort out his feelings and that any words spoken right now would be inappropriate.
"I... can't cry."
The low whisper caught Severus by surprise and he took a closer look at the young man. A haunted look had entered Harry's green eyes, but there were no tears there.
"I cried when I was younger and I missed them, but now... I just can't."
Harry shook his head, looking apologetic.
"Sorry, Mum. Sorry, Dad."
Impulsively, Harry reached forward with his free hand and touched the tombstone with gentle fingertips. He uttered a gasp when additional words formed on the stone below his parents' names.
"Love will guide us through our lives and even farther."
Severus blinked. Albus hadn't told him about this and he was sure the old headmaster wouldn't have left such an important detail out.
This could only mean one thing.
"The tombstone reacted to your magical signature."
Surprised green eyes looked from the inscription to Severus and back again.
"It seems like your parents had hidden something here. A message, just for you."
"Love will guide us through our lives and even farther."
Harry repeated the sentence over and over again in his mind. He knew that he was only still alive, because his mother had died for him... because her love had saved him.
After he had first learned about this in his second year, he never thought about it anymore than was necessary. He had always felt stinging guilt whenever he had thought about his mother dying for him. Hearing her beg Voldemort to have mercy for her son in his third year had made things even worse.
Harry had felt so lonely and helpless every time he heard the last moments of his mother's. He would feel guilty all over again because he was still alive and his parents weren't. If he hadn't been born, his parents would still be here. But he had never consciously admitted his feelings to himself, until Malfoy had stirred them up.
A single tear ran down Harry's cheek at the message solely meant for him. His parents had wanted him in their lives and they had wanted him to live on... because they had loved him.
It was love for Lily and for their son that had made James confront Voldemort by himself.
It was love for her son that had made Lily defy Voldemort.
Harry finally realized that neither of them would want him to feel guilty over their actions, but more importantly, they wanted him to live… and to find the same love they had found in each other. His lips trembled in a small smile. His heart felt lighter now.
"Thank you, Mum and Dad," he whispered. He stroked the tombstone again before straightening up.
"I have found someone whom I love and who loves me," he continued in a stronger voice as he turned to the tall, silent man by his side. "It's you, Severus."
Harry slung his arms around the Potions Master and leaned his head against the black clothed chest.
"I know they would be happy for us," he added and gave a chuckle when Severus cleared his throat.
"All right, my father might rant and rave and we would have to convince my mother first that we are sincere, but then... they would accept it."
Harry looked up so that he could lock eyes with Severus. He wanted the man to believe that his parents would have accepted their relationship if they were still alive, since he still remembered how insecure Severus had been before.
The curving of the thin lips into an almost smile was the only response he received in return, but it was enough. Reaching up to place a gentle kiss on those lips, Harry drew the portkey out of his pocket and held it out to Severus.
"Let's go home."
The warm glow of the lit candles light welcomed them again as the portkey dropped them at their destination. With great presence of mind, Severus steadied Harry as the young man stumbled on his feet.
"It's a miracle that you manage to get onto the Quidditch pitch, without falling over your broom."
A low chuckle escaped Harry, which turned into a sob a second later.
Alarmed, Severus forced the young Gryffindor to look up at him. Tears were glinting in the green eyes, but there was a bright glow at the same time, which lit up Harry's whole face.
"I wish that I... had known them."
Severus swallowed hard. It had been difficult for him to stand at Lily's grave, but how much harder had it been on her son?
It had been a mistake to bring Harry to the graveyard. He never should have brought out the portkey and...
"Thank you for taking me there, Severus. I had to see... it was important for me, although... I didn't know it until... well..." Harry shrugged, embarrassed. "Just… thank you for... being there... for me."
Before Severus could fully process what Harry had said, the young man had thrown his arms around him and was kissing him. Not the gentle kiss of a few moments ago, but a passionate, almost desperate one.
Severus didn't see a single reason to complain about it. Closing the gap between them, he felt Harry's warm body press against his and then soft lips were at his ears, whispering, "Make love to me, Severus."
The Potions Master drew back a little in surprise and gazed into earnest green eyes. Had he heard correctly?
Did Harry really want him, Severus Snape, ex-Death Eater and most feared teacher at Hogwarts to make love to him?
Yes, if the look in Harry's eyes was anything to go by.
Severus took a deep and calming breath. He had prepared his bedroom for a special night where he would share a special and intimate experience with Harry, but somehow... he had assumed it would be the other way around.
He couldn't even explain to himself how he had come to that assumption. He had experienced taking and being taken in the past, but he just... he hadn't dared to believe that Harry would want him to penetrate his body and claim him and that he wanted to belong to Severus in a way he had never belonged to anyone else before.
Uncertainty clenched Severus' heart. He had just opened his mouth to protest when Harry spoke again, his green eyes pleading.
"Severus, I know that it is... selfish of me. I promise that I will... cherish you the next time." A blush spread on Harry's face. "But I just... right now I just want to feel..."
The young man bit his lip and shook his head, his blush growing deeper.
"I need it... I need you, Severus... please."
The Potions Master didn't know what surprised him more, that Harry thought it selfish to ask Severus to make love to him or that he really wanted him in that way. He supposed it wasn't important in the end. The only thing that mattered was the warmth spreading through his body as he closed Harry's lips with his own again.
"You are not selfish, Harry," he whispered. "I'm only too willing to make you mine."
"I'm already yours, Severus," Harry breathed out, before they started kissing in earnest.
Harry felt like his whole body was on fire. Or that he himself was a burning flame, which Severus was fanning with his touches and kisses and...
Harry's hoarse scream was muffled in the pillow as Severus did it again. Never before had he experienced anything that felt so good.
Okay, he had been a little skeptical when Severus ordered him to turn around and lie on his stomach, with his knees drawn up beneath him. After all, he wanted to see the face of his lover and those expressive dark orbs, filled with passion, need and love as they gazed down at his naked body.
Harry hadn't been sure if he would like what was coming next, but his worries had been for naught.
Harry groaned as the skillful tongue of the Potions Master licked him again, a thrill shooting through his body as a wet tip circled the tight ring of muscle at his arse. It teased him madly, making him want to scream out in frustration and want, before pushing in a little and... teasing him even more.
The strong hands on his hips prevented Harry from pushing back against Severus although that didn't stop him from trying. He wanted Severus to stop and he never wanted it to end at the same time.
Harry didn't know if he should feel disappointed or relieved when Severus finally ceased turning him into a whimpering and begging mass with his tongue. Panting softly, he felt a wave of magic and heard a soft clicking noise.
"What...?" Harry tried to ask, but a soft kiss to his neck interrupted him.
"Just relax, I have to prepare you."
Harry nodded. His mind was a little foggy from the things Severus had done to him so far, but he still remembered that he had read something about preparation at some point.
Harry winced as a single, slippery finger entered him.
A puff of warm air against the back of his neck was followed by hot kisses placed all along his spine. The gentle touches thrilled Harry and he felt himself relax, allowing first one and then two and then three fingers to slide inside him.
It felt strange, Harry registered. Not unpleasant, but a little foreign and...
Harry's eyes widened and he groaned. A jolt of pure pleasure had shot through his body and he arched back against those slender fingers when Severus hit that special spot in him again.
It felt so fucking good!
Harry moaned and grabbed the pillow with both hands, sure that he would come from that sensation alone at every moment. He was already so close and... a frustrated sob escaped past his lips when those fingers withdrew, making him feel suddenly very empty.
"Severus," Harry protested when he felt himself being turned on his back again.
Looking up, he gazed into dark and lustful orbs.
"I want to look in your eyes when I make love to you, Harry."
Heat rose in Harry's cheeks, but he nodded and spread his legs, more than willing to become one with Severus.
He was so beautiful!
Severus stroked Harry's flushed cheek with a gentle palm. It had felt amazing to pleasure Harry like that and feel his every reaction as Severus cherished him intimately. It was even more amazing that Harry still blushed at such simple words, after what he had just done to him.
It showed how young and innocent he still was and...
His name on Harry's lips dispersed the surfacing doubts of his own actions. Severus leaned down to kiss the young man's lips, before gazing into those trusting eyes again.
There was want, desire, trust and love in them, but also a little uncertainty.
"Just relax," Severus murmured as he positioned himself between Harry's legs. Slowly, as slowly as possible, he began to enter the young man.
A groan escaped his lips. Harry was still so tight and hot!
Severus wanted to just push into him and lose himself in that incredible tight body, but he forced himself to slow down. Chest heaving, he locked eyes with Harry and bent down to kiss those trembling lips.
It helped a bit.
Severus felt Harry's muscles relax around him and he continued pushing into him slowly, until at long last, he was buried deep in the body of his young lover, panting with his face pressed to Harry's neck.
It felt different than the times he had been with other men. It had always only been sex then, a mere physical act, but with Harry, it meant more. So much more.
A hand touched his hair and when Severus raised his head, he recognized his own feelings mirrored in Harry's eyes.
No more words were needed. Severus started moving slowly in Harry, reveling in the sensations enveloping him and the bright glow in those green eyes, wanting to savor every moment of this magical experience.
The experience of having become one with his love.