None of them really mattered: Zoë, Maya, and even Tristan. They were but names to be spoken, words to be used. Miles Hollingsworth III had never cared for them as more than friends.

But he still had played them, toying with their affections. The chase of each, with its rules of teasing and flirting, had been fun. It was tantalizing, worth far more than any lasting relationship. Each person offered a different flavor, but none had truly fulfilled him. Something was wrong with Miles; he was no longer a normal, caring person.

Zoë had the first of that group, and by far the easiest to pursue. They both fulfilled each other's fantasies: he, the son of a wealthy businessman soon to be mayor, and her, the beautiful star of a West Drive. Zoë longed to be a trophy wife; her looks, demeanor, and attitude were all in the pursuit of someone like him. She was nauseatingly shallow, but he still flirted with her.

His father would have been proud of Zoë for all of those reasons. Everything that made her the perfect match for a rich son made her a horrible person. Miles, if he admitted to himself, felt forced to be with her. His father would have accepted her...and him. Dating a girl like Zoë was like earning a trophy to his father.

Zoë tasted of Parisian coffee shops and late night strolls, but after a summer of that excess, he was too sick to date her further.

He then turned to Zoë's opposite, Maya. The blonde wasn't rich, nor was she as pretty. She was a geeky girl with charm: a dark, rebellious spunk that enticed him in ways the former actress of West Drive couldn't. Her sass was lovable: they had a shared sense of rebellion against their parents. Maya could have played the part of the nice, quiet cellist, but Cam's death had unleashed something within her. She was wild, a feistier spirit and lover than Zoë.

His relationship with Zoë was lukewarm compared to Maya, but still something was missing. The blonde didn't have the spark he unknowingly craved. Like Zoë, something was wrong with her.

So, after months of teasing and toying with Maya, he eventually thought about another student at Degrassi.

He should have realized sooner, but the abuse and pressure from his father had changed him. Dating Zoë had just been to win the approval of his father, but so was dating Maya. They were appropriate dates, but they never excited him.

They couldn't excite him like his fellow males.

Miles hadn't ever acted on those bubbling feelings nor addressed them. For so many years, he had become obsessed with becoming like his father despite constantly failing. Admitting that he liked men...romantically...had never made him feel so vulnerable.

He had to admit to himself that it didn't matter what his father thought. Miles' sexuality had never been more fluid and more terrifying. He didn't know where or who to turn to.

Until he thought of Tristan.

There weren't many openly gay student in the school. At least among the other sophomores. But Miles still didn't admit to Tristan that he too batted for the same team. He just couldn't. Something always made him pause and block that confession.

Tristan might have become a close friend after the summer and joining the basketball team, but he couldn't tell him. Miles didn't want to date the platinum blonde despite that he was leading him on. Tristan was ultimately just as vain and shallow as Zoë, despite that he was in the 'right' body. The gossipy teen would only hurt him if he came out and spurned his affections.

Miles could have came out to Chewy, but the nerd had never been the greatest with emotions. Upon looking back, Miles realized that him keeping Chewy around all these years extended beyond a normal friendship. Chewy might have been his first crush. Even their friendship dynamic was too dangerously flirty for Miles to have ignored this long. Chewy was straight, but Miles almost wanted to punch himself that he hadn't seen it before.

So many signs had pointed to him being gay.

But Miles couldn't accept that.

There was a party tonight and Miles wasn't above drinking away his inner feelings. Maybe he could numb himself into loving Maya, even Zoë. Maybe his father could love long last.

Miles didn't really know who had thrown the party, but he definitely knew who was violating his mouth. They had found themselves into a empty room; the party's music still blaring through the walls.

They were drunk and almost senseless. Miles might have wanted this, but he doubted the male kissing him was coherent enough to say no.

Zig Novak might have surprised him into a kiss, but it wasn't as violent as he wanted to think it would be. It was tender, deliciously so. Almost like a sweet, warm honey connecting their mouths into passionate bliss. A kiss had never felt this soft yet intense to Miles. Zoë pretty much made him do all of the work when they kissed; she had the tender loving of a concrete brick. Maya was wild, but never tender. Zig might have been drunk, but he alternated between fast, bite-like teases and soft, long massages with his tongue. Miles tried imagining what Tristan would kiss like, but it could never have matched the reality of Zig pouring a radiant energy into him.

Miles' fears were bubbling up, almost spilling over. He kept enjoying the kiss, but his mind was coming closer to shutting down. He couldn't accept this.

He couldn't be gay. Drinking was supposed to have dulled these thoughts and feelings.

Zig Novak had not only stirred those feelings but magnified them. Heat was rushing to Miles' cheeks; his senses became even more numb. He needed to regain control. His head was throbbing.

"Stop." Miles' voice cracked as he pushed Zig away.

The other teen might barely be conscious, but he held a shocked pause on his face. Zig hadn't wanted to stop. That fact scared Miles to no end. This went beyond just being curious: another, real male wanted him. That desire made him unbearably uncomfortable.

"I...shouldn't be doing this."

"Just don't think about it then." Zig tried moving closer, but Miles pushed his hands against the other teen's chest in a childish effort to push him away.

Zig laughed. Even Miles could see how ridiculous he was acting. Zig was buff...a fact Miles was learning firsthand. He still hadn't moved his hands off of Zig.

"You can take your hands off of me...or keep them there...just to keep warm, right?" Zig's mouth broke out into a annoyingly smug grin.

Miles finally pulled his hands away, trying to appear stern. His composure failed. "We can't do this. My father..."

"I heard that already...and I don't think either one of us likes playing by the rules."

Before he could continue, Miles was swooped into another fervent kiss by Zig. Instead of fighting, he submitted. Since he had started this, he could at least enjoy it for the rest of the night.

There was no one else in this room besides them. No one from school, his family, and especially his father would see this. Instead of passively enjoying the kiss, Miles pushed himself into it, passionately returning pecks and gushes of their lips. There became almost a dance in their kisses: something delicate yet moving that Miles was becoming too easily addicted to.

Miles pushed away, taking a breath, before looking into Zig's eyes. He didn't really know the other boy, but maybe that was the point. Zig wasn't going to tell his friends or his father. No one would believe Zig. He was almost from a completely different world than Miles.

He cusped the back of Zig's head, leading into another kiss of many throughout the night.

Until he left, he could fully experience the true version of himself, without pretending for his father. He loved the feeling of Zig despite the fear of what could happen tomorrow.

Miles was undoubtedly gay and Zig might just make him love it.

AN: I was inspired to write Ziles (Zig/Miles) after reading "Trust" by Degrassi Nonsense. I'm wondering whether to write more chapters or keep this a one-shot.