"Ladies and gentlemen," said popular television personality, Helen Barlowe Rochester, "my guest today is
someone [she deliberately avoided using the word "somebody"] you all know and love, Casper, the Friendly Ghost!"

Casper smilingly acknowledged the applause of the studio audience.

"Casper," Helen said, "I would like to thank you very much for agreeing to appear on my show today."

"It's my pleasure," Casper replied. "Of course, I can also disappear," he added, suiting action to words.

The audience clapped and cheered. Some of them even whistled and stamped their feet

Casper re-materialized and took a bow.

"Thank you for that demonstration," Helen said.

"Well, I knew your studio audience wouldn't be frightened by it."

A man in the front row raised his hand.

"Yes?" said Helen

"I'd like to see Casper go through the wall and then return."

The audience began chanting, "Go through the wall! Go through the wall!"

Casper obligingly went through the wall on the left side, and returned on the right.

The audience, to use a cliche, went wild.

"Now," said a woman in the third row, "how about giving us a good, loud boo?"

"I'm sorry," Casper said, "but I don't bee-oh-oh."

"That's right, because you are a friendly, rather than a scary, ghost," Helen said.

"Well," Casper said, "I don't see the sense in deliberately scaring people."

"And you never haunt anyone," said Helen.

"Well," Casper said, "that isn't quite true."

"Are we about to have a revelation here?" Helen asked. "Is there somebody you haunt?"

"Yes," Casper said.

The audience gasped.

"There is someone I haunt," Casper went on. "I never actually go to visit him, but I haunt him
every day of his life. I haunt a certain drunk driver."