Felicity refused to look at the tabloid left on the table next to her, trying her hardest to ignore it. But she didn't succeed long, her eyes glancing over to see Oliver on the cover, a beautiful blond on his arm. The title read: Queen Still a Party Animal. Without thinking, she reached out, flipping the magazine over, returning her attention to the computer before her. The small coffee shop was bustling with people going to and from work, Felicity found herself enjoying the noise, not being alone.
Laurel Lance stood before her, a tentative smile on her face. Felicity smiled back, "Hi, Laurel. How are you?"
"I'm well, just getting my daily dose of caffeine," she said gesturing toward the cup of coffee in her hand. "Mind if I sit?"
Felicity did mind, not thinking she could handle talking to Laurel if she brought up Oliver, but instead found herself saying "Sure," pointing to the seat opposite her. Felicity closed the lid on the laptop, waiting for Laurel to talk.
"I heard you're no longer working for Queen Consolidated." Laurel said, smiling sadly.
That was putting it mildly. She had shown up the day after Oliver fired her, ready to yell at him until he changed his mind, only to find all of her things neatly boxed for her at the front desk, a security guard offering to take them to her car, making it clear that she was no longer welcome. Oliver had been ignoring all of her phone calls, text and emails. Even Diggle had been strangely silent, finally returning one of her calls to tell her he thought it was for the best, that she would be safe this way. That had been a week ago.
"Have you found another job yet?" Laurel asked, before continuing, "I don't mean to pry, just curious."
"Uh," Felicity began, looking down at her laptop where she had been reviewing three different job offers. "I have some offers. I'm thinking about becoming an independent contractor. Act as a consultant to big companies."
"Well from what Oliver says, you shouldn't have any trouble getting a job," Laurel said, encouragingly. Felicity nodded distracted.
"I think I'm going to go the consultant route," she said, focusing in on Laurel. "Travel the world, never stay in one place too long. Become a nomad."
"Won't you get lonely?" Laurel asked. Felicity shrugged. She was already lonely. "Have you talked to Ollie lately?"
Felicity shook her head, her eyes dropping to her hands in her lap.
"He doesn't smile any more," Laurel said, waiting until Felicity was looking at her again before continuing, "He didn't smile, not for a long time when he came back from the island. But then you started working for him and he started smiling. Not his 'I'm Oliver Queen' fake smile, but real genuine smiles."
"He smiles-" Felicity began, ready to defend Oliver for reasons unknown.
"No," Laurel cut her off, "He didn't, then did, now he doesn't any more. He stopped smiling completely about a week ago or maybe longer."
"I don't-" Felicity began again, looking for an exit, but Laurel didn't let her finish.
"I don't know what happened between you two. Or why one minute Oliver is saying you're the best thing that ever happened to him and the next you're no longer working for him. But I do know Oliver. He misses you and I'm pretty sure you miss him too."
"He fired me," Felicity said, because she had nothing else to say.
"Sometimes Oliver does stupid things to avoid dealing with his issues. Like take my sister on his yacht behind my back," Laurel said. "Don't let him get away with it. He's a good man, even if it is hard to see sometimes."
Laurel gave her one more sympathetic smile before leaving Felicity to her thoughts. She tried to think about all the times she had seen Oliver smile, too many to count. Then she tried think about all the times his genuine smile hadn't had anything to do with her. That was easier to count; a handful of times at Thea, a couple of times Diggle had made a joke and once when his mother had gotten out of prison.
Objectively, Felicity understood Oliver's decision. Knew that in his mind at least, he was doing what was best for her; keeping her safe by cutting her off. But that didn't make it hurt any less. Laurel had a point, Felicity realized, Oliver did go to extreme lengths to avoid dealing with issues and it was time to stop him.
Felicity had expected an upgrade to the security system at Verdant, but was surprised to find he had only changed the passcode. It took all of five minutes for her to break it. The lair was empty, everything exactly how she had left it, sending a pang of longing up her spine. She very studiously avoided looking at her desk where he had kissed her. Instead she stared at his racks of arrows, waiting.
"We're prepared this time," she could hear Oliver saying from the top of the stairs. "We'll get him."
"We're a man short, Oliver," Diggle said. "Without Felicity-"
"We'll be fine, Dig," Oliver cut him off, their voices growing closer as they made their way down the stairs, "We'll get him this time."
Felicity stood in the middle of the room, waiting for them to notice her. They both stopped short at the bottom of the stairs, clearly surprised to see her. Diggle looked relieved, but Oliver's face went from surprise to anger in about two seconds.
"I thought I made it clear," Oliver ground out, "You are no longer welcome here."
Diggle ignored Oliver, walking around him to give her a quick hug, "Good to see you. You find a new job yet?"
"Not yet," Felicity said, her eyes on Oliver. He had stalked over to his Hood outfit, keeping his back to them as he changed. Diggle looked between the two of them, concerned.
"I'll go bring the car around," he called to Oliver, giving Felicity a supportive smile before leaving them alone.
Standing in front of him, Felicity didn't know where to begin; all the various arguments she had constructed over the last week leaving her.
"Did you need something?" Oliver asked, turning as he smeared black paint around his eyes. His voice was hard, devoid of emotion. "We're kind of busy at the moment. Deadshot has reappeared."
"I heard," Felicity said. "I could help."
"I don't need your help."
"Yes," she said, her voice growing a little as her anger returned. "You do."
"I'll manage," he said, grabbing his quiver, dismissing her.
"You're better with me," she whispered. He stilled, his back to her.
"Yes," He said, sounding desperate. "But you're not better with me."
"I can't watch you die," Oliver shouted over her, turning to look at her. "I've watched too many people I love die and I won't do it again."
"Oliver-" she tried to interject, but he kept talking, ignoring her.
"I had to watch Sara die twice. Twice! I had to bury Shado with my own hands. I couldn't prevent McKenna from being injured. I couldn't protect her," his whole body was tense, his face raw with pain, "And Laurel, Felicity, I killed Laurel. I killed the Laurel that she used to be. I killed her soul."
She saw tears welling in his eyes, as he ran a hand over his face, trying to steady himself.
"I destroy everything I touch," he went on, his voice low trying to get her to see his side. "I can't destroy you too."
"Oliver," came Diggle's voice from behind them, neither having noticed his return. "If we don't leave now we'll miss our chance to get Deadshot."
Oliver continued to stare at Felicity. She watched as he slowly got his emotions under control before responding, "Coming."
And then he turned, walking out of her life again.
She wasn't sure how she got home, her head lost in thought. Over and over again she replayed their conversation in her head, thinking over all Laurel had said too. She sat in the dark processing the day before numbly opening her laptop to check the local news sites. It didn't take long for the news to catch up, each reporting a Hood sighting and then slowly the story broke; Deadshot had been killed. There were a few hazy videos of the Hood fighting Deadshot on the roof of a building downtown. Felicity winced as Deadshot used his gun to hit the Hood in the gut.
And then it clicked, all of it; the island, the kiss, being fired, their conversation that night. Felicity was in the car already driving before she even realized where she was going, pulling up to Queen mansion twenty minutes later. Belatedly Felicity realized it was well past midnight, wondering if anyone would be awake to let her in. Thea answered the door.
"Finally," she said in a huff. "When sending Laurel didn't help I was sure I would have to go."
"Excuse-" Felicity began, but Thea only waved her hands to stop her.
"He's in his room," she said, pointing the way, clearly done with the conversation.
Felicity silently padded through the mansion, steeling her nerves before slipping inside his room. Moonlight gave the room a faint silver glow, allowing her to just make out an Oliver size shape under the covers of the bed. She dropped her purse, slipping off her flats, leaving her jacket on the floor. Quietly she climbed into his bed, nestling beneath the covers until she found him. His back was to her, so she wrapped her arm around him, pressing her forehead between his should blades.
His hand clasped the arm she had wrapped around his body, turning slightly as he did it to look at his intruder.
"Felicity?" He asked his voice groggy from sleep. "What are you doing here?"
He turned to face her, laying on his side, his face looked exhausted, resigned.
"You would destroy me," she whispered.
"I know," he sighed.
"No, you don't," Felicity said, her voice growing a little louder. "If you push me away, if you cut me out, that would destroy me."
"You'll find someone else," he said, but his eyes were more alert, closely examining her face.
"No," Felicity said, shaking her head slightly, reaching out a hand to trace the tattoo on his chest, "You think if I stay with you I'll be destroyed. But I know, if you push me away, it will destroy me. So either way, I'm destroyed."
"Felicity," he whispered, but she heard it, heard the longing in it.
"If my destruction is as inevitable as you and I seem to think it is, then at least let us enjoy what time we have," she finally looked up from his chest, meeting his eyes. "You love me."
It wasn't a question. It was a fact that Felicity couldn't believe had taken her so long to see. She watched closely as he digested the information, watched as he prepared an argument in his head, then his hand reached out, running fingers through her hair. His eyes tracked his hand's progress, before returning to her face.
"I do," he whispered in confirmation, pulling her closer with the hand in her hair. "Which is why I don't think I could survive watching you die."
"Oliver," she said, resisting the urge to roll her eyes. "You of all people know that death is a part of life. Which is why we have to take every opportunity we get to live."
He had no response, his mouth opening as if to argue but shutting again quickly. She could see he was fighting with himself, struggling to find an argument he could hold on to. Then he sighed, resting his forehead against hers, his thumb stroking her cheek. She wrapped a hand around the back of his neck, pulling him foreword, knowing she had won.
"Don't push me away again," she whispered against his lips.
"Never again," he said, his voice strong, his eyes boring into hers before closing the distance between them.
The kiss was slow, methodical. His tongue pushing into her mouth, while his shoulders pushed her down into the mattress. His hand was roaming around her back, her sides and she was too distracted to realize he was searching for the zipper of the dress. She pushed him back, maintaining eye contact as she undid the zipper on the side, before reaching down to pull off the dress. He grabbed it from her hands, tossing it over his shoulder as he pulled her closer with the other hand. He kissed her cheek, her jaw, moving down to kiss her neck, her collarbone.
There was nothing stopping them now, no excuses, so they took their time.
He seemed intent on memorizing her body; kissing each of her breasts, mapping them out with his hands before dipping his head to suck on one nipple until she whimpered. When he began to kiss down her stomach, his hands removing her underwear before settling between her thighs, Felicity nearly cried with anticipation.
"Condoms?" She asked with a sigh, sitting up on her elbows, glancing at the bedside table. She didn't see him move, his mouth suddenly on hers, kissing her thoroughly before pulling away with a smack. He grinned as his hand left her body to shuffle through the drawer turning on a bedside table in the process, pulling out a condom. She moved to grab it, fantasies of rolling a condom on Oliver Queen having been a frequent part of her daydreams.
"Patience," he smiled, pulling it out of her reach, distracting her from responding by kissing a trail from her neck to her stomach. He gently spread her thighs further, his eyes taking in all of her, a look of fascination on his face. "I've been dreaming about doing this since the island. No, I've been dreaming about doing this since I met you."
Felicity didn't have time to formulate a response, his head dropping quickly, licking up her center before beginning to suck on her most sensitive spots.
"Oliver," she screamed, unable to contain herself as he continued to work on her,. Her hands grabbed at the sheets, before one of them reached out to his head between her thighs, combing through his hair.
It was almost embarrassing, only taking him inserting one long finger to push her over the edge, screaming his name as she came. His mouth and hands worked on her until the last shot of pleasure had been wrung out. She lay there boneless, dazed as Oliver kissed his way up her stomach. He was grinning by the time he made it her face, looking down on her with a self satisfied smirk.
"I deserved that," Felicity said with a grin of her own as she watched the smile slip from his face in confusion. "After the hell you put me through the last week. That is just the beginning of payback."
He dipped his head giving her a quick kiss before pulling back to look at her, his face serious "I wanted to protect you. All I ever want is to keep you safe."
"I know, you noble idiot," she whispered, poking him the shoulder with a small smile. "But your 'protection' only ended up hurting me."
"I'm sorry," he said, his voice earnest, the regret obvious, before he moved to give her another quick kiss. When he pulled back he was smiling. "It was pretty hellish here too. You should have heard the lecture I got from Thea when she heard what I'd done."
"You deserved it," she said with a small laugh, Thea's comment when she had let her in suddenly making sense.
"I did," he said, solemnly before his mouth was on her again, his hand tangling in her hair while his other hand skimmed along her thigh, pulling it up toward his hip. Taking the hint, Felicity wrapped her legs around his waist, could feel him still hard between their bodies. He kissed her long and slow, before pulling back to put on the condom.
"I wanted to do that," she huffed when he returned to her, his hand between them, positioning himself at her entrance.
"If I have any say in it," he groaned, pushing into her, causing her eyes to roll back, the pressure so utterly delightful, barely hearing him finish his thought, "There will be many opportunities in the future."
She could only nod her affirmation to his statement as he began to move inside of her; the man far better than any fantasy she had ever had. She had always known his incredible strength and discipline would translate to wonderful things in the the bedroom, but nothing could have prepared herself for the reality. His arms held himself above her, his hands slightly under her, gripping her shoulders, her nipples grazing his chest with every thrust; she felt cocooned, she felt safe, she felt amazing.
"Felicity," he moaned as she shifted her legs, changing the angle slightly. Removing one of his hands from her shoulder, she felt it snake between them until it reached her core at the same time Oliver kissed her, swallowing her own moan.
Her world exploded as he sent her over the edge for the second time, once again screaming his name, his mouth silencing her. She bit his lip as he reached his own release with a guttural call of her name, pumping into her until they were both spent. He collapsed on her, the weight of him surprisingly wonderful, but he must have been concerned, because he was all too quickly pulling back, out of her. She was too tired to track his movements as he threw away the condom, before returning to her, laying his head on her stomach, his arms moving under her back, embracing her.
"That was even better than I imagined," Felicity said to the ceiling, her hands absent-mindedly scratching his hair, his neck, his back. "And I imagined it a lot. Like a lot, a lot. I never imagined it happening here though. In the office? Sure. At the foundry? Of course. But in Oliver Queen's bed? Even I couldn't imagine that."
She felt him laugh into her stomach as she rambled, causing her to lift her head to look down at him. His chin rested on her stomach, visible between the valley of her breasts. He was smiling up at her, silencing her with a raise of his eyebrow.
"I love you too, you know," she said, reaching out a hand to trace his brow, loving that he leaned into the touch, closing his eyes. His eyes opened lazily, the smile on his face mischievous as he slowly crawled up the bed until he was looking down into her eyes.
"I might have had an idea," he said, laughing against her mouth, "that maybe you had a little bit of a crush on me."
He silenced her protest with a kiss. And Felicity knew in that moment that even if loving him did destroy her, it would be worth it.
And that's the end!
Thank you all so much for sticking with me through this story! It's always a little nerve wracking stepping into a new fandom and all your reviews/follows/favorites made me feel like I wasn't a total fool. I've been over analyzing these characters for weeks and I had a feeling when I wrote the previous chapter that it would get mixed reactions. I actually re-wrote it three different times because I had intended it to be the last chapter for the entire story but no matter what I did good-guy-Oliver refused to stay. It was terribly frustrating, so I hope my conclusion doesn't disappoint.
Thanks again for reading!