Hmmm, All that that i have has got me WIRED!!! I've gotta write this or i'll die of the inability to go crazy writing fics.

Note: Most places, people and other things are true, but i twisted them so bad, my mum couldn't even recogize it!

"A Raichu For A Week" By Twilight The Umbreon

Prologue and Day 1: Sunday/Monday

Hey, I'm Jason. I'm an ordinary kid from an ordinary town, in an ordinary state and an ordinary rich country...Ok! Ok! I'm live in the stinky town of Botsmell, which is in the wierd state of Ficsmorphea in the country Mozmania, well known for its giant six-foot, slimy, killer mosquitoes wearing pink g-strings and playing catch with generades (with the pin out, of course). A few weeks ago, I was a normal kid, hanging around at the mall, busting my cash at the arcades and trying to sneek into the over 18's sex clubs with nothing but a wet fish, a rubber duckie called Elvis and a fake ID. But just over a week ago, some really wierd things happened, which changed my life forever...

It all started on a Sunday night, when I was up my room, playing my gameboy. Nothing special, just the usual smell of charcoalled food and the sound of acid rain, nothing out of the ordinary. I was playing Pokemon Gold, training up my awesome, super-cool raichu. I was in Mt Silver, when I saw a trainer which I've never seen before. "Cool" I exclaimed, eager to battle this new rival, but just before I could, suddenly my gameboy short-circuits, giving me a small shock in process. I get annoyed. My gameboy resumes working, but with two very important differences. Firstly, that trainer had disappeared, but the second (and most shocking thing), is when I check my pokemon...

AHHHHHH!!!!! My scream echoes throughout the town, smashing windows, setting alarms off, popping eardrums and causing millions of dollars damage to the glass museam down the street. I look back to my gameboy in vain. "Oh SHIT!! My raichu has disappered!!!" I howl. I go back to the pokemon centre, and search the boxes, no raichu. I then check the day-care centre, no raichu. I hit the gameboy several times on my head and then check once more, again no raichu. I finally calm down after several hours searching. I decide I would catch another pikachu and train that up, but before doing that, I decided, I'll need some sleep. So I climbed into bed and started snoozing.

That night I had a wierd dream, my super-cool raichu was standing in front of me. he ran jumped and before I could cry in joy, dived INTO me. I then fell to the ground, fealing really wierd and weak.

I woke up to the nice sound of the...the f***en evil electric alarm clock. I swing one of my apendages at the clock, smashing the alarm clock and recieving both a dull pain in some unknown part of my body and a slight tickling feeling which felt great in the same part.

I run happily all the way down the hall, and I reached the living room, I saw heaven...a big basket of juicy, big, red apples in a wicker basket on the table. I jumped onto the table and started munching on the apples. The sweet juice started dribbling from my mouth. As I was eating, I sneeked a peek into the nearly mirror and saw...myself, but i was not human. Somehow I'd sprouted a tail, big feet and had nice yellow cheeks. I had become a raichu. You would of thought, I've been shocked but I wasn't. In fact, when I tried remembering who my mother was, a motherly raichu with dark yellow cheeks is whom I remembered. It was very wierd, in a way, but not wierd from a raichu's point of view and that's what I thought myself to be and always been, a raichu.

I'd nearly finished eating all the apples in the wicker basket when an unfamilar foregin human poked her head around the corner, and saw me. Her face showed signs of bewilderence before changing into dark anger. "Get Out!!! Get Out!!" she screeched banishing a fearsome looking broom. I just looked at her once, then continued to eat more apples. Then, WHACK!!!. I flew a few metres forward, propelled by the power of a vicious broom. Now my anger was up. I turned around, maddened and with sparks starting to fly from my cheeks. "RRRAAAAIII....CCCCHHHUUU!!!" I screamed, releasing a powerful bolt of electricity at the human. "ZZZAAPPP!!!" It was a hit! Smoke curled from the human, as her face changed from anger to rage. "GET OUT, YOU DISGUSTING, YELLOW ELECTRONIC RAT!!!" she screamed as she swung her broom at me with all her strength. It smashed the TV, totally wrecking the screen. About then, I decided that it would be smart to make a very hasty exit, pronto. So I ran out of the open front door into the street. As I started running across the road, i heard tyres squealing and a horn honking very loudly. I tried to jump out of the car's way, but mistimed. I hit the bonnet bouncing up and over the car. somersalting. Then I executed a perfect landing on my hind legs. "RRRAAAIII" I exclained, looking like a very furry, plump, comical gymnist by how I was standing. The honking horn sound of a shiny red firehouse, which was about to made me into one of the world's cutest pieces of roadkill alerted me to my potential demise. So I jumped for my life. The firetruck, I avoided, but not the petrol tanker behind it. I heard a very sickening sound which I thought was the bones in my tail breaking, and felt a overwhelming pain half-way down my tail. I went a little crazy. Then the petrol tanker just went BOOM!!! and i was well onto my way in breaking the world's raichu soaring record (Which currently doesn't exist!).

I came down in an sore, painful lump about a block alway from the school. I picked myself up slowly from the grass and cheaked my tail where the tanker had ran over it. I t was still qiute tender but nothing seemed to be broken. Then I wandered aimlessly down the street. By some odd chance, I ended up wandering into a schoolyard. It was recess, and all the children were outside chatting, playing games and generally just having fun. My new and improved raichu instincts told me to beware. "Run! Don't appouch the humans, Danger" my raichu instincts were screaming at the top of thier metaphorical lungs. As I prepared myself to run off like a bat out of hell, a cry of joy came from one of girls "Cool! A raichu!!". Suddenly, I was surrounded by a big group of girls, all admiring my fur and physique. My fear quickly melted away as the schoolyard girls continued to pamper me. But, unfortunally, it didn't last long. There was loud, quaking footsteps. All the girls began to shy away from me. I looked side to side, bewildered. Well, at least until I turned around...

Behind me, was the most fearsome, massive brickhead of a human that I had ever seen! He looked so big and tough, not even a rampaging, full-grown male rhydon could flatten him, let alone budge him from his current position. And the weird thing...he wasn't an adult. I started backing away from him, with a comical but desperate grin plastered on my raichu features. "Rai, Rai, Rai, Rai, Rai..." Look, we can get along without a fight... I tried to explain, but you know how brickheads are like. It would of been a miracle if I could communicate to him in this mood, IF i was human let alone now.

So I done the usual thing raichu do when treatened. I thundershocked him. For a tough looking guy, he was quite wimpy after being exposed to electricity. He first started to back away from from me. Then, as I prepared to shock him big time again, he turned aroung and started running, crying like a baby. All the girls who witnessed the proceedings swarmed back to me, amiring me. I even got a kiss on the nose by a very beautiful girl, which was a first...ever.

A bell rang, and all those nice girls began to walk away into the buildings leaving me alone. I sighed a long raichu sigh and began dragging myself somewhere I could get attention.

The sun had started to set. Ihad been searching for attention for the whole day. I got a fair share of kisses and kicks, admiring fan and angry mobs howling for my blood. I was getting sleepy, and my thoughts were thinking about the wierd place i had woke up on. I ran into a nearby house, looking for one of those "things" i have woke up on this morning. I found one (a bed) and snuggled into it. I fell asleep straight away.

Day 1 finished...finally! Day 2 will be out soon so look for it!