|A/N: This is a fanfiction for Tokyo Revelation. While not the
greatest anime in the world, it has very nice character designs and the
sub-story between the main character Kojiro and Akito is worth the less
than stellar main plotline and other characters. I think most shounen ai
fans will at least like that aspect of the anime. I really like it despite
some of its faults.
That said, the ending left me wanting more, it seemed 'incomplete'. So here's my attempt at giving it a resolution. Btw, the shounen ai focus of this story is actually keeping in line with implications in the anime itself.
Warnings: Shounen ai/yaoi content (boy/boy love), spoilers for the anime Tokyo Revelation, violent imagery, and occult themes.
Pairing: Kojiro Souma/Akito Kobayashi
Comments and criticism welcome...
"I won't go,
"I can't leave,
Here with Me
Kojiro bolted upright, beads of sweat dripping down his cheeks and soft brown hair, his breathing erratic. He stared down at his hands, a wildness in his bright blue eyes. Blood. So red and bright and warm. Akito's blood. Strands of fine silver hair stained, deathly pale skin, so smooth and delicate, majestic lavender eyes, silver lashes tinged in blood, closed. Closed forever. And all for him. To save his life, Akito had unhesitantly given his own.
Kojiro clenched his hands, the blood of his dream, nightmare, memory, gone as reality soaked his mind. Yet he could still feel it. A sticky warmth that stained his skin and seared his soul.
"Akito," he murmured, closing his eyes as a single tear teetered at the edge of his lashes. "Why? "
"You always protected me, Kojiro. And for that I loved you."
Kojiro pushed aside the memory of Akito's last words. He didn't want to think about the sacrifice Akito made in the name of a love Kojiro never returned. Sad violet eyes smiling at him, only at him. So wanting and vulnerable, so easily hurt yet so easily masking that hurt within nervous laughter. And so beautiful. Not something Kojiro would have usually attributed to his own gender, or one his own gender would appreciate...
But, Akito... Akito had always been beautiful, even as a small boy -- so fragile and sweet. As a young man, slender and graceful, he was almost ethereally so. If only...
No! He could never have given in return what Akito wanted to give. Never! He was a friend, only a friend and even that was tenuous. blurred by the distance of years before the fey, silver-haired boy came suddenly and unexpectedly back into his life. And now was gone... gone from it. Forever.
Throwing the blanket off his long legs, and rising from his bed, he tried to leave behind the horrible memories the night had mercilessly brought him yet again. Like every morning since...
He snatched his glasses from the bedside table and slid them onto his handsome face.
Today, he was returning to school after a rest from his injuries, although he would never admit to anyone, including himself, that the most severe wounds he needed to recover from were what haunted his mind every night, every day, sometimes so persistent he wasn't aware of a moment without, for the last week, ever since...
Enough! How was he to get his life back to normal? He needed to move on. Brooding was not his way. That was more like...
Damn! Damn, damn, damn! He fell to the floor, twisting his fingers in the thick carpet, pushing back the tears that demanded release.
"Kojiro, Yosuke and Saki are here," a young voice called from outside his door. "Kojiro." A boy, no older than ten, stood in the doorway, concern spreading across his cute face. "Kojiro! Are you okay?!"
Kojiro looked over at his little brother, forcing a smile. "I'm alright. No need to worry."
Senshiro lifted an eyebrow, not quite convinced. "Uh, if you say so. Hey, you're not even dressed for school yet. Yosuke and Saki are waiting!" With that he scampered off, down the hall.
Walking quietly with his friends, Kojiro gazed upward. Streaks of clouds, too thin to be white, hung like lace on the perfect blue sky. So peaceful and so far from the constant turmoil within him.
No one at school had understood. While gossip traveled quickly, the rumors involved him being hurt, not the truth of why. And not why he was truly hurting.
Akito had become just a grumbling whisper, a sordid tale of the strange new kid who mysteriously died just days after starting classes. Akito, who had been so full of life, who had transformed from a shy, gentle little boy to a self-assured, charismatic teenager. Akito was dead, and apparently only he cared.
Only he cared. Only he knew what Akito had been, even if he wasn't sure what Akito had become. Yet, he could still see the sweet little boy he had protected from bullies in the beautiful young man. He could see the arrogance was a front, a shell, built to protect when Kojiro no longer could. And knowing what he knew of Akito's... disposition, the fey boy likely needed all the self-protection he could find.
His steps stumbled on a crack in the pavement. He barely noticed. Instinct kept him on his feet. Shoulders stooping as he bowed his head, he trudged along the sidewalk towards home in a gloomy daze. The muffled mumbles of Yosuke and Saki flowed over him like the faint breeze. A breath against his ear.
"Snap out of it, Kojiro!" Yosuke's sudden growl ripped through the haze.
Kojiro blinked and turned to his friend. Yosuke's arms were banded across his broad chest. A frustrated scowl narrowed his dark eyes. Saki, long hair like the rays of the sun, stood closely beside her boyfriend, her hand hooked delicately on his arm. Concern was soft on her pretty face and bright blue eyes.
Yosuke unfolded his arms and clapped a hand to Kojiro's shoulder. "It's sad when someone dies, but that freak tried to kill everyone!"
Korjiro wrenched away from Yosuke's grasp. "There's no need to call him a freak!" he snapped, his eyes flaring to a cold blue.
Saki jerked back from Yosuke, her stance wide and wary. She shot her boyfriend an uncharacteristic glare. "Yosuke!"
"Hey! Why am I the bad-guy?! He may have brought you back to life, Saki, but it was his fault you were killed in the first place!"
"Shut up, Yosuke!" Kojiro strode ahead a few feet, his shoulders quivering in anger and... something... else.
"You don't know anything. He... he..." His fingers clawed into his hair, and Kojiro shook his head.
Biting his lip, Kojiro fought back his foolish tears. Anger or grief? They had become one and the same. Yet, only his grief had one clear direction.
With a hitch of pain, his voice was quiet, cold, and defeated, "I... I'll walk home by myself." Head bowed, he turned a glance over his shoulder to Saki. "See you tomorrow, Saki." His lips twitched. "Bye."
Saki smiled. A sad smile that glittered in her violet eyes.
Kojiro froze. What?
Her bright blue eyes stared at him with concern. "Kojiro, are you okay?"
He buried his face in his hand, rubbing the sudden ache that grew in his temples. "I'm fine," he rasped, his throat dry. Then he turned and ran home, ignoring his worried friends.
He needed to get a hold of himself. No matter how much he hated to admit it, Akito was dead. He wasn't coming back. No matter how much he may want him to. Even, needed...
Kojiro slammed the door to his small bedroom and fell against it. What was wrong with him? He had no problem living his life without Akito before. To be honest, after a while he hadn't really noticed the loss of his friendship when the small, sensitive boy had moved away all those years ago. It was so easy to get caught up in what his life became. But now...
Now was different. Perhaps by knowing that even though he had let their friendship drift to a mere memory, Akito had remained a loyal friend. A friend still willing to...
Kojiro dropped his face in his hands, biting back the pain he thought he was forcing under control. He couldn't let Akito become just a childhood memory this time. What he had done .. sacrificed...
Falling to his knees, Akito's delicate face overwhelmed his thoughts. How could he get through this? He couldn't forget. Wouldn't. Akito deserved to be remembered. But he couldn't continue his day to day life with the pain so raw. It wasn't working, as today was proving with aching clarity.
... And it didn't help that Akito's beautiful violet eyes, for him gentle and vulnerable, haunted him. Even to the point of hallucination. Or insanity. Just for a split second, Saki's eyes hadn't been her own. No, instead...
... Instead, they... were... Akito's...
... soft and violet...
... like Akito's.
"Kojiro. Can you hear me, Kojiro?"
Huh? "Akito?" Kojiro's head jerked up, drowsiness falling from his mind. Akito stood before him, reaching out to him. Smiling. Sad. Sweet Akito.
Kojiro lurched forward, desperately grabbing for his friend, but as the sleep faded from his mind so did the image. Like a tendril of smoke in the wind, it drifted to nothingness. Akito was gone.