"This is absolute shit."

Eren couldn't believe what he just heard. The new project that he had worked painstakingly on, spent weeks overtime poring over, cried tears of sweat and blood for- was shit? He looked up imploringly at the figure before him, swallowing at the severe look on his boss's face.

"Sorry, Chief, I don't understand-" His voice came out shakily. Levi's words pierced through Eren like a butcher knife, and a lump grew in his throat.

"I said, this is utter shit," Levi raised his voice a notch. His eyebrows arched down in a disapproving frown. "I give you the chance you wanted, and you give me this bogus? Are you that stupid to not understand? This is disappointing."

Eren watched as Levi picked up his stapled project papers and leisurely discarded them in nearby trashcan. They fluttered into the dark abyss of god-knows-what, and disappeared from sight.

The first thing he felt was shock; then came the frustration, and eventually, anger. Five weeks of dark eye bags and exhaustion- down the drain, or more precisely, the trashcan. He put all his heart and soul into this project- the solo project that was the chance for him to acknowledged, or maybe even promoted - and to have it dismissed so simply and rudely made him absolutely speechless.

Levi then turned around in his chair with a satisfied, and carefully wiped his hands with sheets of sanitary wipe. Eren clenched his fists, knowing very well that his papers were not dirty or tainted at all; rather, had packaged them perfectly for today, complete with a vinyl binding and a plastic cover.

Eren opened his mouth, then closed it. He was unable to make a sound. How dare he?

"I-" Eren's nails dug painfully into his palms. "I worked so hard on it-"

His boss clicked his tongue loudly, interrupting Eren mid-sentence.

"That garbage?" Levi dryly answered. "Yes, I understand the hard work it took to overcome that constipation that led to this pile of shit that you let out from after your tight anus. Redo it."

Eren paled slightly at his boss's crude language, but even more so at being told to redo it. There was no way in hell he was going to spend another few weeks working on a project that he knew was going to be rejected.

Levi raised an eyebrow at Eren's disheartened figure. "I have a meeting to attend to, and I can't waste any of more of my time explaining why shit is shit to an imbecile like you. While I'm gone, write up another project proposal."

And thus he left his office, leaving Eren to seethe at the empty desk and chair in front of him.

Ever since he joined this company, his section chief had found endless ways to torture him. Work was just absolute hell for him now; whether it be by extreme workloads or being humiliated in front of his coworkers, Levi had become the source of all of Eren's unhappiness. He just couldn't understand why his boss insisted on treating him this unfairly. It wasn't fair at all, considering that Eren didn't slack off nor did he do anything upset Levi; it was simply that Levi didn't like him. And that little fact made him want to sit down and cry, because he had wanted to do well at this job and to accomplish things and enjoy his work- but he couldn't.

Still shaking from anger and disbelief, Eren dragged himself back to his cubicle, where he was met with sympathetic pats and smiles. Usually, those simple acts of kindness would instantly make him feel better, but today, he ignored their sympathies and stonily sat down in his chair. Not even his colleagues Sasha and Connie's improvised comedy skit could make him laugh.

His heart was laden and uncomfortably tight, but nothing hurt more than the cruelty that his work had been rejected with. He couldn't get the image of Levi nonchalantly throwing his precious work into the trashcan out of his mind. He didn't have to throw it into the trash, that fucking bastard. Even if Levi didn't like his project proposal, Eren would've gladly settled for a polite rejection and an explanation of why it had been rejected.

What did he ever do to him? Why was he the only one to suffer? Eren savagely seized a pen and began to scrawl the date on the top of a piece paper laying atop his haywire mess of a desk. He gritted his teeth, hardly noticing when the tip of the pen cracked and broke off. Fuck.

"Does anyone have an extra pen?" He called out over his cubicle wall.

Unfortunately for him, he was met with several negative grunts of no's and sorry's.

Disgruntled, he trudged off to find one- he reckoned he could nab one from an empty conference room. It turned out to be harder than he thought, for nearly every room he passed by was full. His day could not get better, Eren sarcastically thought.

Eren let out a sigh as he found what he was looking for in the business conference room, which was normally reserved for weekly morning meetings. At the very center of the oval table was a metal penholder with shiny, new pens. He tested the pens on the side of his wrist before plucking his pen from the penholder. Just as he turned to leave, there was a clicking noise- the sound of the doorknob being turned.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck my job. Fuck my boss. Fuck my life. Fuck everything.

He swore countlessly in his mind. This was definitely one of those unexpected events that he would have never suspected to happen to him, and it would scar him for life- if he even managed to survive through it.

Because, dear god, right in front of him, just a few inches away, was his boss's crotch.

Clothed, but still his crotch.

Merciful god, spare me.

Eren sucked in a deep breath, covering his mouth to prevent the panicked scream that was threatening to spill from his trembling lips. He couldn't believe his luck; just as he was about to leave the room, some section chiefs had entered the room. And of course, being the absolute genius he was, he decided to dart under the conference table. Hence this predicament.

Ten out of ten, Eren, he thought to himself. It was a natural, instinctual reaction- but still unbelievably idiotic. Maybe he really was as stupid as Levi said. No! Eren internally screamed. He wasn't stupid, and he knew that. But why, oh why hadn't he just greeted the section officers, told them that he was getting a pen, and then promptly leave?! If he had, he wouldn't have to be crouched under the table and facing his boss's... private part.

Eren silently moaned to himself, squeezing his eyes open in shut and holding his hands up in mock prayer. He wanted to scoot back, but Eren was too petrified to move, lest he accidentally alert one of the tablesitters of his presence. His heart was crazily palpitating, and just the notion of making a sound sent him to the edge of insanity. If someone discovered him lurking under the table...

It's not too late to leave, he told himself. Just crawl out, stand up, and offer an explanation. Apologize for interrupting the meeting. Then, hallelujah, calmly leave, and it'll be just like nothing ever happened.

Eren gulped. He could hear the section chiefs discussing business related matters, with the occasionally snarky comment by his boss. After a particularly fierce comment ("That really is the motherfucking dumbest idea I've ever heard, Hanji, please sew your mouth shut to keep horse shit from falling out"), Eren was reminded of how his boss had brushed him off earlier today.

"Yes, I understand the hard work it took to overcome that constipation that led to this pile of shit that you let out from after your tight anus..."

A tiny fraction of his fears disappeared, replaced by fury. Wait...

He leaned forward, and placed his hand on Levi's crotch. He wasn't sure if Levi noticed or not, since there was absolutely no reaction from him - no leg twitch, no yell of surprise, nothing at all. It was rounded and warm, and he started to press harder on the fabric, feeling the severe contours of the man's crotch from the surface of the clean linen-

Levi flinched.

Eren immediately withdrew his hand.

Oh my god. What am I doing?!

I must be insane.

But Eren quickly placed his hand back onto Levi's crotch. In that one second, he felt almost stupidly proud as he repeated to himself, "I am insane".

With that, he proceeded to massage the area. He was kneading, stroking, rubbing- and Eren's own hands began to burn with an unfamiliar heat. Levi made no response, but Eren grinned to himself.

Oh, yes. Today, he was going to humiliate Levi in front of the other section chiefs.

He knew that this was a very bad idea. However, he was so overwhelmed with emotions that all semblance of logic was ridden away with a flurry of heated fury. He couldn't wait to make Levi moan in pleasure in the middle of the meeting. He licked his lips, imagining how embarrassed Levi would be, and how angry he would be as well- but it wouldn't matter, since the news that Levi had moaned and gotten off during office hours would travel through the company at the speed of light, and tada!, his well-known reputation as "Captain" would crumble into dust. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.

Filled with determination, Eren leaned forward. He hesitated, a tad unsure, for a brief second, and buried his face in the warm area between Levi's legs. Eren rubbed his face against it, then slowly licked around the area, dragging his tongue in circles around the base of a bulge.

He pressed his tongue against the bulge, letting his saliva drain onto the dampening clothing material, relishing the idea of how crazy Levi must be to know that his pants were being dirtied by an "imbecile". Feeling smug, Eren tried to take it a step further; he daringly inched his hands up to slowly pull down the zipper. It reached the halfway point-

He let out a small strangled cry and retracted his hands. Levi had swiftly kicked him in the side of his stomach, and goddamn, it hurt like hell. Were his boot tips covered in a layer of metal or something? Considering it was the notorious devil manager known for scaring many new employees to fleeing from their job, Eren wouldn't be surprised. Clutching at the dull ache at his side, Eren twisted his mouth in pain and squeezed his eyes shut.

There was a brief moment of silence, until deep voice spoke up.

"What was that noise?"

Shit shit shit, Eren thought. That was Erwin, the president of the company. He paled drastically, breath nervously hitching as he anticipated the worst.

A tinkling giggle, then a female voice said, "No idea... but it sounded startling similar to a dying cat."

"Hanji... I won't even ask. But honestly, it sounded more like a human to me."

"Mere semantics, Erwin. Anyways, I'm pretty sure it came from under-"

This was it. He was doomed.

"You're all wasting time. Can we just continue and fucking finish this useless meeting?"

The steely tone of Levi's voice left no room for argument as the section chiefs fell uncomfortably silent, then directed their attention to a different topic of market demands and math percentages that went straight into one of Eren's ears and out from the other. He had nearly been found! Eren really didn't want to think of what would happen if he did get caught- there was the non-negotiable fact that he would be fired, but gods, the humiliation he would face with his superiors was just unbearable to think about. His record would be tarnished with the statement that he was the employee that got kicked out for molesting his boss during office hours.

Eren shivered with dread. Would Levi's reputation be tarnished as well? Probably not, Eren sourly thought, considering that everyone always listened to Levi, as if he was some glorified, golden trophy- even the President of the company was known to listen to Levi's words.

Dry-mouthed and terrified by how close he had come to getting caught, Eren resignedly crouched lower under the table. Eren had yet to come to terms with what he had just done; for the most part, he was completely disturbed by his own actions. He didn't bother to think about why Levi had spoke up, but was now plagued with anxiety, because of one thought- Levi was out to get him.

Fuck.

Get him after the meeting, of course. But still, Eren could only remain rock stiff as he felt his impending doom grow closer and closer with every tick of the clock. He tried to not think of karma and revenge served on a cold dish, and desperately ignored the voice in his mind that he deserved what was coming to him. In the midst of his terror-stricken state, Eren jerked violently when he received a stomp (light, but still somewhat painful) to his hands.

Glaring at his boss- his crotch, at least- he looked down to see his red and clammy fingers. He also noticed a small piece of paper next to them. Eren knew what it was going to say. He picked it up. Of course, it would say-

Are you going to continue or not, you shitty brat?

Scratch that.

That was definitely not what he expected. He had expected something around the lines of "Shitty bastard, you're fired" or even "You are a motherfucking asshole, and I will torture you and stab you and kill you and eat you".

He stared at the elegant handwriting, rubbed his eyes, and rapped on his forehead with his knuckles; he was probably tired or still in a hazy state of mind induced by his terror. But no matter how hard he tried to 'come to his senses', the words on the paper remained ever so static. Pursing his lips in frustration, Eren turned the paper over. On the back, there was another short line:

Or are you so bad you can't even get your boss's dick up?

Shots fired.

This bastard...

Eren almost growled in response. Hell. He had enough of being underestimated. He resisted the urge to strangle Levi's leg (if that was possible) and instead stared at the wet patch on Levi's pants, where he had slobbered all over just a few minutes ago. He debated over whether he should stick up for his own pride or not. He was already screwed, so... why not? Might as well try to make something out of it, he mentally grumbled to himself - for example, proving to his boss that he was more capable than he appeared, along with humiliating him. He could hit two birds with one stone, Eren reasoned.

Throwing aside his worries and arming himself with his determination to show himself and to regain his manly pride, Eren finished pulling the zipper down. Not that he had expected anything flashy, but his boss's boxers were an unsurprisingly plain shade of navy blue. Somewhat unnerved, Eren pulled down on Levi's boxers with ease. Slowly but surely, it appeared, and there it was, in all its glory, his boss's bare penis.

Embarrassingly enough, Eren's cheeks grew warm. He had no idea why, since he had been into many physical activities when he was still in school, and bare dicks were hardly a scarcity in the school showers. But this was different. He had expected to be repulsed or disgusted- but he found himself reaching up with trembling hands to to fidget with the trim of the boxers, slowly wandering closer and closer to the impressive length.

Gnawing on the inside of his cheeks, he pressed himself closer to Levi's crotch so that he was perched perfectly between the man's spread legs. Levi's penis was halfway between limp and erect. It was flushed and dark- an extreme contrast to Levi's normally pale skin.

Eren reached out and grabbed it in his hand, alternating between clenching harder and softer, too apprehensive to do anything more drastic than simple touches and strokes. Once he grew more comfortable- which honestly was no where even near half, Eren propped his elbows on Levi's legs and lightly touched the very tip with his tongue. He slowly worked on the tip, alternating between rolling his tongue around and letting the bulbous end rest on the surface of his flattened tongue.

Eren gave a squeak when rough and callused fingers massaged their way into Eren's scalp, and his head was forcefully pushed forward as his nose collided with Levi's semi-erection. Eren swatted at his boss's hand, but complied to his will as he gripped the length harder, bent down, and dragged his tongue from the base to the top. He gathered a mouthful of saliva, and let it drip onto the top where beads of precum had leaked out. It throbbed in his hands, and the unfamiliar heat from before arose at his fingertips. His hair brushed past the inside of Levi's thigh as Eren ducked and licked the bottom of the penis, occasionally grazing the flesh with the tip of his teeth.

The length suddenly grew harder, and the heat seared through his hands. Eren parted his lip and took in the thick tip. He fervidly began to take in more, swirling his tongue around the shaft and pressing it to the insides of his cheeks. As it went in deeper, Levi's hands found reappeared in his hair, now harshly massaging the back of his neck and ears.

Eren began to grow breathless. He nearly bit Levi's dick when something abruptly touched his own groin. Eyes brimming with a strange wetness, Eren looked down to see Levi's boot on his crotch. With Levi's dick still in Eren's mouth, he could only make a quiet, muffled noise of protest as Levi began to use the tip of his boot to rub up and down on his own erection. Pleasure tingled up his spine, and he shivered.

Out of pure curiosity, Eren gently nipped the side of the penis and sucked on a flap of skin on its base. Levi flinched, and Eren managed to catch something akin to a groan. Levi's hands grew stiff.

"Are you all right, Levi? You sounded like you were about to hurl." A chuckle from above.

Self-satisfied, Eren continued to suck at the very same spot. Levi's foot slammed lightly right into his shoulder, and Eren backed off at once, scowling. How many times had he gotten kicked today?

"I'm perfectly fine," Levi stonily replied.

The hands returned, and guided Eren's cheek so that it lay on the material of Levi's pants. Levi's penis rested on the his other cheek, and Eren could feel the tip occasionally press into his skin, leaving a hot, moist trail. He couldn't help but feel wonderfully comfortable with warmth on both sides of his cheeks, and found himself slowly nodding off in the midst of the droning voices above him.

Levi suddenly violently pushed down on his head, and Eren gagged as the shift ruthlessly protruded into the very back of his mouth, touching the wall of his throat. His vision grew blurry as hot tears prickled at the corners of his eyes. He squinted and pushed on Levi's thighs in a silent plea to let go. But Levi's grip was set in stone, and Eren could do nothing but let his mouth thrust up and down, each pounding sending Eren's mind into a dark nothingness. When Levi released his hold, a stream of summery liquid shot into his mouth.

Bleary-eyed and confused, a relieved Eren let the penis slide out of his mouth as he gasped for air. The taste or texture didn't register in his muddled mind. All he could think of was covering his mouth with his arm, trying not to let out his loud pants. After wiping the sticky remnants of cum and saliva off the area around his mouth and collarbone, he sat motionless.

The touch of Levi's hands grew lighter, and in an almost gentle motion, swept over his front bangs to tuck stray hairs behind his ears. They lingered on the crown of his head for a second, and Eren nearly closed his eyes in bliss at the soft touches. Levi's fingertips caressed his ears for a few last touches before retracting themselves from underneath the desk.

It was humid, he realized. Beads of sweat had accumulated over his forehead and neck from vigorous movement and – he awkwardly thought- the heat from tucking himself in between Levi's legs. He shuddered at the cold air.

Levi's foot was still relentlessly rubbing at his crotch. Occasionally Levi would switch to gently stroking the bulge with his heel, but it was mostly a dominant kneading that invaded in between his thighs. He squirmed at his boss's touching. It was uncomfortably tight down there, and sent waves of desire spiraling up his torso. He hadn't released once yet, and he was aching to do so.

Eren mourned the absence of Levi's foot for the rest of the meeting. The aching had been reduced to a dull, hot throbbing, leaving him hollow and yearning. Even so, he didn't dare to touch himself for relief.

"Levi, you're not leaving?"

Eren peeked around Levi's legs to see pairs of feet making their way to the door. The meeting was finally over. One by one, the seats were emptied, and Eren relaxed his limbs at the sudden extra space.

"No, I'm going to look at these papers again."

"Always the overachiever, huh? Don't work too hard!"

"You work too little," Levi dryly responded.

After a few last chuckles and farewells, the door slammed shut. The foreboding sound echoed around the room, as if signaling Eren's imminent demise.

Eren frantically pried his boss's foot off his crotch and scooted back to the other end of the table, putting as much distance as possible between Levi and himself without emerging from under the table. He waited with baited breaths for Levi to finish his papers and just leave.

It had finally, and truly, dawned on him. He just gave his boss a blowjob, under a desk, during a meeting. And what more, Levi returned the act with his foot.

Eren pinched his cheek. It had to be a dream. It had to. But no, the pain in his cheek told him that it was real.

Petrified, Eren sat still. Kill me now.

He felt the blood draining from his head, and didn't need a mirror to know that he was whiter than Levi's impossibly white button-up shirts. He sat still and fretted to himself, hoping that Levi would finish looking at his papers and leave. Or, better yet, kill him now and relieve him of the pain of waiting. The ideal situation would be that Levi would ignore this little... incident, and that they could merrily continue on their separate paths and pretend nothing had happened. However, there was no way in hell that would happen, so Eren kept himself grounded and just hoped for the best.

After what seemed like an hour later, Levi finally stood up from his seat.

Eren sucked in a deep breath and resignedly closed his eyes, waiting for the axe to drop.

"Eren Yeager. My office. Now."

He knew it. He quietly buried his head into his arms, drawing his knees up and curling into a ball. He was going to be killed, skinned, and fired. Just like a turkey. He was starting to feel the regret weigh down on him. Eren hung his head in self-pity and muttered to himself, "I'm officially screwed..."

Levi's footsteps paused.

Shit, did he hear? Eren gulped.

Levi slowly turned on his heel, and his footsteps approached the table until they landed precisely in front of where Eren sat, eyes wide with fear. Eren could see the shining tips of his boss's boots from underneath his pant cuffs. They were touching his clothed erection not too long ago, Eren dumbfoundedly noted.

Levi crouched down, and looked at the panic-stricken male with an unfathomable expression.

"No, you're not."

Surprised, Eren looked back up.

"I-I'm not?" Eren whimpered. He didn't dare hope...

"After you visit my office," Levi licked his lips, eyes slowly wandering over Eren's rumpled form. "You shall be, as succinctly put... 'officially screwed'."

Yeah, he was screwed.