Manny drove and crashed his car into a telephone poll. But he was okay, and the telephone poll was next to a bar, so yay.

"Booze," Manny groaned as he picked up his toolbox and went into the bar.

Inside the bar was Pablo the bartender.

"Hola, Manny," said Pablo. "What can I get for you today?"

Then Manny ordered a beer in Spanish, but then ordered it in English for some fucking reason, even though both he and Pablo spoke Spanish.

"Here's your beer," said Pablo, sliding it over to Manny.

Manny drank it in one swift gulp.

"More!" demanded Manny, in the same way that Cookie Monster demands cookies, or salads, or people, or whatever the fuck Cookie Monster is eating these days.

Speaking of Cookie Monster, he entered the bar.

"HOOKERS!" yelled Cookie Monster. "COWABUNGA!"

But then Manny shot him. The nightmare was over.

"Thanks for saving my life, Manny," said Pablo. "Cookie Monster was always coming in here, convinced this place was a whore house for some reason. Fortunately there were always hookers in the restroom to satisfy his sick craving, but today is 'No Hookers Allowed' Friday, so he would've eaten me for sure."

"Like I give a flying fuck," said Manny. "Give me free booze for the rest of my life and we'll be square."

So Pablo agreed to give Manny free booze for the rest of his life.

Then Manny shot him cause he didn't trust Pablo to keep his promise.

Then he stepped over Pablo's bloody corpse and opened a drawer to read his will.

It turned out that he wished for Manny to own the bar in the event of his death.

So Manny now owned the bar. He drank a whole lot to celebrate, cause he could drink anytime he wanted to now, and would make a fuckton more money than he did as the world's greatest handyman. But tragedy was still coming. If only Manny knew how close it was.