Dr. Cristina Yang paced the floor of her hotel room. The little boy on the floor was oblivious to his mother's pacing, since he was busy with his crayons and his coloring book.
"Where are you, Alex Karev?" she said, as she looked at her watch. "I am going to be so late."
Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. She quickly whipped open the door. "Alex Karev, where have you been?"
"I mean, is that a way to greet one of your oldest friends, Cristina Yang?" he said. The two old friends gave each other a hug. The little boy got up from the floor and ran and hugged Alex's legs.
"Hey there, Xander. How are you?" Alex said. He swung the boy up to lift him up.
The little boy giggled and said, "Uncle Alex." Cristina handed a bag full of Xander's things.
"He's got toys and snacks in there," Cristina said. "He has had his breakfast and you can buy him his lunch. Something hot, good and nutritious. He likes apple juice, so you can buy that for him."
"Cristina, I can handle a three year old boy," Alex said. "You are just lucky that today is my day off, so I could take care of him. Oh, one thing, I have to go in and check on one of my patients. So there is a possibility that you-know-who may see him."
"Don't worry. He wouldn't know who Xander is," Cristina said. "It will be okay."
"Okay, whatever you say. You knock them dead at Seattle Pres," Alex said, as he and the little boy left. Cristina watched them go down the corridor, singing and waving their hands in the air. Alex was such a good friend, she thought.
She pulled on her jacket and picked up her handbag and headed down to the lobby of her hotel. The doorman called her a cab and she told him to go to Seattle Pres. She had been invited by the administrators of that hospital to demonstrate the Yang method, which had won her the second of her Harper Avery awards.
She looked out of the window of her cab, taking in all of the buildings of the city where she had once lived. She had not been here in four years.
Four years ago
When she won her first Harper Avery award and had been given the offer by Columbia University of the opportunity not only to run her own research lab which was funded at $60 million, she felt she could not refuse. She would also be given the position of Assistant head of cardio surgery, a position she could fill until their current head of cardio surgery was ready to retire and she would be put in his place.
Owen had told her that she should take the position – there was nothing that Grey Sloan could give her that was even remotely equal to that. She said that she would think about it.
The day that she finally made her mind to go to New York, she had found Owen in the on-call room, taking a rest. Things have been strained between the two of them, especially now that he was engaged to Emma and she was pregnant with his child.
She opened the door to the on-call room. He was lying on the bed without his scrub shirt on. He sat up, as soon as the door was opened.
"Hey," she said. "I just wanted to tell you that I am going to accept Columbia's offer," she said, softly. "There isn't much for me, here anymore." He knew she was referring to his impending marriage to Emma and their child plus her relationship with Meredith had been on a downslide, for quite a while.
"I think it is best. We can't offer you what they are offering. You are going to do great things, Cristina. You are so brilliant," he said. "I wish you the very best."
"Thank you," she said. "I am going to leave tomorrow."
"Can I get a goodbye hug?" he asked. She reluctantly came to him. They were so magnetically drawn together that they had avoided touching each other. One touch and they knew that they would be a goner. Still, he took her into his arms and hugged her. She wrapped her arms around his bare torso.
He buried his face into her curls. And then, when he raised his head, their lips met and then their hands found their way under each other's scrubs. And then, they were on the bed, naked and making love to one another. They both knew that it was morally wrong. After all, he was engaged to another woman but there was something so right about it. Their chemistry was too intense. When they were together, it was like nobody else mattered.
After they made love over and over again, they lay there in silence. "I am going to miss you very much," he finally said, as he pulled her closer together. "I cannot love another person the way I have loved you. You are my soulmate."
She knew that it was true but they were broken because they had both wanted different things. They hugged each other, until it was time for her to go. With one last kiss, they said goodbye.
When she had gone to Columbia, she was really excited. She was getting to run her own lab the way that she wanted. She was also getting to pick and choose what surgeries she would like to do. She didn't have to do anything mundane anymore. She was only up for the exciting and the most challenging surgeries. The hospital had found her a new apartment on Central Park West. She loved it there, since she was overlooking the park. It was a hectic first three months at Columbia. There was so much to do. She hardly got any rest because it was all go-go-go.
It was during her 14th week there in New York that she woke up feeling a little queasy. "I cannot be coming down with the flu," she thought. There was too much still to be done. She figured she would head it off by starting with the medicines early. She thought she would just drop it on one of the doctors at work. She chose to go to see Dr. Shelley. She liked the older woman with the horn-rimmed glasses and the grey hair.
"Alright, so you think you're coming down with the cold," Dr Shelley said. "When was your last checkup, Dr. Yang?"
"It has been a while. You know doctors make the worst patients," Cristina said, with a laugh.
"So we will take blood and urine," the doctor said. "So how have you settled down in New York?"
"Doing really well, I think," Cristina replied. "The lab is fully operational and I also have had some really great surgeries."
"Great," the doctor said, as she drew two vials of blood from Cristina. She also told Cristina to go to the bathroom and return with a urine sample. When she returned, the doctor took out a pregnancy test to test the urine.
"I am not pregnant," Cristina said. "I have not had any pregnancy symptoms."
"So when was your last period?" Dr. Shelley asked. "I am looking at your intake sheet and it says that your last menstrual period was over three months ago. Maybe, pregnancy might be a reason for your queasiness."
"That's because my periods have been irregular. Plus the stress of the move and the establishment of the lab may have also factored into it," Cristina said. "I am really supposed to take some pills to regulate it but I really haven't had the time to do this."
"Hmm," the doctor said. "Your pregnancy test should be ready by now." There was no mistaking the positive sign on the stick. "Well, it looks like you are pregnant."
"No!" Cristina said. "That cannot be. My stomach isn't even getting bigger." Well, that was somewhat not true. There was a slight roundness to her belly but she had attributed it to that the junk food she had been eating, since she really hadn't had time to get any really good food.
"I haven't even had any morning sickness," she declared. She remembered her first pregnancy with Burke's child before she had the miscarriage. She had been so ill with morning sickness that she could almost not function.
"Well, we will see," Dr. Shelley said, as she wheeled across the ultrasound machine. "Just lay back and let me put this gel on you." Cristina did as she was told and as the doctor ran the wand over her stomach, it was no mistaking that someone had taken up residence in her uterus.
"Ah, there we have it," Dr. Shelley said, almost triumphantly. "You are definitely pregnant. That is a very clear looking fetus. I think you are about 14 weeks. You are already past your first trimester."
Cristina knew that was totally right. The fetus had to be about 14 weeks. It was 14 weeks ago that she and Owen had their last goodbye in the on-call room. She just couldn't speak as Dr Shelley continued on and on about her lack of prenatal care in the first few months and that she needed to get ready.
After she left Dr Shelley's office, she made up her mind that she was not going to tell Owen about the pregnancy. After all, he was already married to Emma and they just had a baby girl. It was not going to be his problem.
She thought long and hard about what she was going to do about the baby, when it arrived. She figured it might be best to put it up for adoption. After all, she didn't have time for a baby in her life. Yes, that was what she was going to do.
The only person she told about the pregnancy was Alex. Alex was now her health proxy. Since she was his health proxy, she decided to replace Meredith as health proxy and named Alex instead.
"So are you going to tell him?" Alex asked, when she told him about the pregnancy.
"No," she said. "I don't want to intrude in his life. He's already married. He's probably happy. After all, he got the kid he always wanted. Besides, how is he going to explain about a baby who is younger than his own child?"
"So what are you going to do, when the baby is born?" he asked.
"I am seriously thinking of putting it up for adoption," she said.
"Wow, Cristina, you really could do that to your own kid? It's not like you are a teenager with no means," he said. "You are a noted cardiothoracic surgeon, youngest winner of the Harper Avery award."
"Well, it's just a thought I had for the moment," Cristina said. "When it is time, can you come to New York for when the baby is born? I mean you are my health proxy and if anything goes wrong and I bleed out and become brain dead or anything like that, I would need you to be here."
"Sure, I will make sure that I am free and I will be there," Alex said. And so he was.
When the baby was born and Cristina saw his beautiful face with his curly hair, she realized how hard it was for mothers to give up their babies for adoption. Alex was right. She wasn't some penniless teenager. It was never about her not loving her own child. She just hadn't wanted any. As she had told Owen, of course, she could love her baby but she just didn't want any. She ran her finger on his smooth, perfect face.
Alex stared at her. He had never imagined Cristina Yang would be looking so lovingly at her own child.
"So what are we going to do?" he said. He wanted to know whether she was still going to put up the baby for adoption.
"We are going to name him," Cristina said. Alex chuckled. If she was going to name him, then it meant that she was going to keep him.
"What's his name?" Alex asked.
"Alexander seems to be a great name," Cristina said. Alex was very touched. "You've been my rock throughout this pregnancy. I thought it was fitting. We will call him Xander because you are Alex and we don't want to get the two of you mixed up."
"Xander – that's a good name. Sounds like a stud," Alex said, laughing.
"Of course, you will be his godfather – whatever that means," Cristina said. She was the godmother of Zola Shepherd and Sofia Torres but she never really knew what that meant. She sent them presents every birthday and Christmas but she never really contacted the children.
"Are you going to tell him?" Alex asked. Cristina firmly shook her head.
"But I am going to give Xander, Owen's name as his middle name. Alexander Owen Yang," Cristina said. "He should have something of his father, even though they will never know about each other." Alex agreed.
As Cristina headed to Seattle Pres, Alex headed to Grey Sloan Memorial to check on one of his patients. Even though someone had been assigned to follow up on his patient, Alex still wanted to check in on the young patient, even though it was his day off. After checking in on the patient, he and Xander sat in the lobby, where the little boy was drinking from an apple juice box.
"How you doing there, Xander?" Alex asked. The little boy gave him a thumbs-up, which made Alex laugh.
It was how Owen and his daughter, Jordan, saw Alex and Xander in the lobby. He wondered if Alex was with a young patient, given that the kid had an Asian look about him. As he drew closer, he could tell that the boy was actually only half-Asian. In fact, the kid reminded him of someone, especially with all of that dark curly hair and full lips. But it couldn't be, he thought. His heart ached when he remembered the child he could have had with Cristina.
"Hey, Alex, who is this little chap with you?" Owen asked.
Alex looked a little nervous but he smoothly said, "Just my godson. His name is Xander. He is named after me, Alexander but we call him Xander. He just turned three."
Owen looked curiously at the child. "Do I know his parents?" he asked.
"No," Alex said, a little stiffly. He hated lying to Owen but he knew he had to keep Cristina's secret. "We're just having a day together on my day off. Just came in to check one of my post-ops, this morning. Then Xander and I are going to have a day at the Woodland Zoo and then to Pike Place Market, where we are going to get some food. After that, I am going to drop him off at his mom's."
"Sounds like a wonderful day. Just going to drop off Jordan here to daycare," Owen said, nodding at his blonde hair, blue-eyed daughter, who was going to be four in a couple of months. "Great to meet you, Xander."
The curly haired boy looked up and smiled. "Yup," he said. It was the way he smiled that Owen saw another person's face.
As he and Jordan walked away, he couldn't help but think of his former wife, the woman who was the love of his life. He looked back at Alex and Xander. Alex had scooped up the little boy in his arms and they were headed out the hospital doors. He could see the little boy's face above Alex's shoulders. He saw Owen looking at him. Xander smiled and waved.
A/N Please leave your thoughts and comments. I don't think this will be a long story. Maybe a couple of chapters. I would appreciate to hear what you guys think since this is new.