Disclaimers: I do not own anything out of Resident Evil. All of the contents belongs to Capcom
'I don't understand why Sherry and Redfield's sister wants me to do this, but you sure have an ass of a record in driving if they want me to be your teacher.' - Jake Muller
"Care to pick me up again, Claire?"
For goodness sake it has been the seventh time in the same month that his number pops up in her iPhone screen for the same old reason, so much that she thinks that it is becoming lame. For the seventh time, Leon Scott Kennedy—infamous agent of the United States of America that had reaped countless merits and contributed credits to the country—has thrashed his car yet again.
Claire is the one to pick Leon up each and every time when he got his tickets and to ferry him to the nearest police station since his is... totaled. When she has reached the crash scene this time, she almost let out a sarcastic laugh at how Leon has destroyed his Chevrolet, the front of the car is completely flattened that the seats hug the dashboard. The engine literally exploded, lighting the bark of the poor tree like a Christmas tree - the firemen are doing their best for the moment.
She waits at the roadside a bit further from where the crowded scene are, while Leon comes up to her sheepishly with his latest fine ticket.
"Wait," She stops him mid-way, despite how the car was now a train-wreck, Leon is completely unscathed! "How come you are alright and your car is not?"
He chuckles, like the crash is something on his regular basis, "I bailed out."
All she can do is to stare at him, gaping like a fish would.
She always wondered how the hell did the guy got his driving license in the first place. Leon had thrashed too much cars that was enough for her to buy a house already, a few houses.
Leon has a bad streak when it comes to automobile. Cars, motorcycles, boats and planes, said man even get to make a story out of each type of vehicle. Maybe only a few lucky vehicle survived.
Even when there was a time that Claire offered herself to be his personal driving tutor, his bad streak only ended briefly when there was not a single crash for a long month. It didn't last for long - soon after Kennedy's apparent return from a mission in Vietnam, his driving senses must had gone haywire again.
This time, she finally decides that the agent Leon Scott Kennedy will get some driving lessons from someone capable of handling a vehicle more properly than he will.
In which now Claire has invite her best friend slash foster daughter over to her apartment on their day-off to discuss of the candidate.
Sherry Birkin can only snicker at Claire's misfortune.
"It's not funny, Sher! You should have known how embarrassing it was to bring him away from the scene every single time!" She slaps at the younger blonde's arm at her sudden outburst of laughter, "I am starting to think that guy at the office knew our first names already."
Taking a sip of her tea, Sherry can make no comment out of that (apparently hilarious) remark by Claire. But she does believe Claire about the part that Leon has produced too many commotion in one lifetime; Sherry remembers her time in China when an American plane crash landing before her subsequent reunion with Leon... only to learn from Harper later on (after the mission) that Leon was the one piloting the aircraft. "So, you want to find a Leon a driving teacher? Could that even be possible?"
"That's the problem." The woman in her thirties sighs, "I asked a few people... my brother is too busy with his BSAA, Hunnigan said that she doesn't even drive, Helena told me that she too had a similar streak with Leon - although hers are only minor accidents unlike that idiot."
The problem is harder than they thought.
"Well..." Sherry timidly starts, "I do know of one person."
"A friend of mine. He said that he will be visiting me soon. He's one heck of a driver and I think Leon will learn something out of him."
"Wow..." Claire beams, "So, who's the guy?"
"If it's not for Claire to stop pestering me, I will not do this."
"If it's not for Sherry to stop begging me, I will not be doing this too."
So here they are, two proud men with their own share of ego, stuck in Leon's brand new vehicle.
Leon Kennedy occupies the driver seat whereas Jake Muller takes the passenger seat.
As soon as Jake Muller emerged from the airport only an hour ago, Sherry and Claire literally kidnapped the mercenary into their vehicle and drove him to where Kennedy's residence was.
Jake only surrendered after the sixteenth pleading from Sherry Birkin whilst Claire had Leon covered beforehand by a flood of phonecalls prior Muller's arrival. Then the ladies forced the men into Kennedy's vehicle and drove off on Sherry's car, right before Claire threatened both men to 'do their jobs' or she will ensure that she and Sherry will 'do theirs'.
Since Claire held Leon's house keys hostage and Sherry held Jake's bag of his essentials, the two men knew better than to be sleeping under the night sky and not under the roof.
"I don't understand why Sherry and Redfield's sister wants me to do this, but you sure have an ass of a record in driving if they want me to be your teacher."
"Pft," Leon huffs indignantly, "I don't see anything wrong in my driving, nobody gets killed yet when I am behind the wheels."
"Sure. Sure. Let's get moving so that I can see what's wrong."
Off with them to the nearest highway where Leon just drives aimlessly, and Jake pays no attention to his driving but his surroundings.
It's his first time here in America and boy, does the Land of Opportunity looks fun. There's already plenty of things on Jake mind to do in Uncle Sam, aside from killing - and taking pictures that is.
"So, what's up with you these eleven months you gone incognito?" The DSO agents question the mercenary, breaking the silence since their reunion after China.
Jake smirks at the window, "Killing."
"It's still an activity so you can't complain with that, Hero."
Now, it is Leon's turn to smirk, "You are so like how Sherry told me of you; tough to get along with."
"Likewise. But I am not really used to making friends so no hard feelings."
"None taken." Replied the agent.
It is at one point of meaningless driving that Jake starting to notice that something is amiss; his body is falling back due to the inertia and his eyes finally hover to the windshield, in which the speed of the vehicle is too fast that everything around them pass by in a blur... then to the speedometer which shows that the car is moving in—
Jake screeches finally, shooting the agent a dreadful glare, "Jesus, Kennedy! 110 miles per hour in a conventional car? What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
"What, afraid of speed, Muller?" Leon taunts, refusing to slow down his acceleration whatsoever, "That's so unlike you."
Groaning, Jake protest with Leon's statement when his right hand grips into the side of his seat, "We are not driving in a muscle car and one tiny bit of problem and we're dead. No wonder Redfield's sister told me that you stall a police cruiser in just three minutes of driving on it!"
The thirty-five ignores the remark, "To be exact, it's two. But a zombie was inside with us so I lost control of it."
"Well, there ain't no shit zombie in here and you are about to kill us both!"
With a flick of his tongue, Leon makes a sound and stamps his feet on the brake - not in the way Jake hopes for. Usually, one will apply the brakes little by little until the vehicle slows gradually to alert any drivers behind; what Leon did is the exact opposite, the way he pedals onto the brakes with force produces a deadly screech on the tires, leaving long black marks on the poor highway on its wake. Jake curses loudly when his seat belt nearly snaps when he is thrown forward by the first Newton's law of motion.
And the car stops completely, not slow.
Saluting Leon with a middle finger, the mercenary asks, "How the hell did you replace a car whenever you thrash one?"
"Perks of being the guy who saved the last president's daughter- and yeah, the guy who save the world by ridding Simmons off the Earth." Leon throws him a shameless grin, almost too proud to say that.
"Jeez, how come my blood saved the world and I don't get any of those?"
"Ah, now I get it." Jake exclaims, his head shaking with a new realization, "I see why you keep thrashing cars after cars..."
"Enlighten me." said Leon, a little smirk on his face.
The young mercenary scoff dryly at the senior and points his finger to the front of the car, "You hardly felt bad about it whenever you totaled one because you know you can always get another in return. Your main problem is that you hardly feel the remorse for destroying something replaceable or anything not yours." He says, "That's bullshit for a guy like they said you were, Hero. If you keep having this mindset, I feel really sorry for the cars in the future."
For a moment, Leon stares at Jake in disbelief. His brows knits together closely but he nods in agreement finally, "I guess that you got a point."
"Yup, big guy. Grow the fuck up and learn to love your property. I take good care of my stuff even if I have seven digits on my account." Jake crosses his arms behind his head, "Get moving, Hero. Let see if you had learn something out of this stupid driving lesson Sherry got me into."
Pulling the clutch to the first gear, Leon resumes in speed from the highway. However, he obliges with the younger man this time and move in a considerable speed that gathers no complaint from his so-called teacher.
This time, they both see the improvement.
"You guys are back!"
The men frowned as they pull the vehicle up in front of the coffee shop as per the women's request. Claire and Sherry still have the styrofoam cups in their hands when the former ushers Jake out from the front passenger seat and ask him to join Sherry in the back.
"So, Jake... did Leon learn anything?" Is the first thing that Claire inquires as soon as she climbs in next to driver Leon.
Jake only shrugs impassively, smirking over at his Supergirl and glares at the coffee, "That's for you to decide, really."
"We've got a chance to test it. Leon, drive Jake to Sherry's place. We'll see along the was if you've got an improvement in the least." Claire suggested cheerily, downing the rest of her coffee and giggling insanely.
The suggestion baffled the two men in the car, who had both expected that Jake would be staying in a hotel.
Especially Leon, since Sherry showed indifference to Claire's idea. "Wait, Jake's gonna stay at Sherry's? Alone?"
Rolling her eyes, Claire smacks Leon on the arm, "Would you rather him to stay at your place? You had only one bed, remember? Besides, it was Sherry's own suggestion." She turns over her shoulder to wink at the young Birkin, "She even had Jake's stuff left on her apartment."
"Really now?" Jake eyes at the girl with humor. She only nods meekly in reply, and the mercenary does not miss the blush creeping up her pale cheek.
"You hear em'. Go, drive already! Step on it!"
And begrudgingly, the driver has to obliged to the order from the fiery woman.
Although... Leon supposes that he is ready to leave his little Sherry in Jake's care, if Claire has already.
Since Jake has already understood what appreciation does for him way before he did.
"Been a while since you called. What's up, Supergirl?"
"Uh... yeah, it's been a while. Um... am I bothering you?"
"You know I am always okay to talk hours with you. Spill it already."
"Okay. So, are you going to be free and come to the States again soon?"
"Maybe, I am almost done with the cleanup here. Perhaps next foreweek... What's wrong? Last time you asked me this, it was Hero with his driving problem..."
"Uhh, yes it was partially Leon's fault but... How do I say this —"
"Sherry, is that Jake on the phone? Lemme talk to him! Is that you, Jake?"
"Yeah, thank god you answered the phone. It's about Leon!"
"Heh, his driving streak had returned?"
"No, he's getting so much better that the streak hadn't return until now... Can you give me a motorcycle lesson too next time you're here?"
A.N: I am not gonna lie... This idea had actually sit on my computer for six months long that I finally got it completed today! :D Leon's streak was so horrible that there's someone even made a meme out in Tumblr, which was funny as hell. My cousin often made jokes about Leon that whatever vehicle he came across, or even a glance or being its passenger - would end up being totalled. She was telling the truth. XD
And those who was wondering about the Jake/Sherry fic I said I would be writing, I actually had two idea going on and I still had yet to decide which is better. It might take a while! :)