Author's Notes: Greetings all you people out there in reader land! And welcome to the next chapter in this little romp of insanity…

To My Reviewers:

rosered2310: AUGH! So it was noticeably less funny? Arg. *Begins To Get Slightly Paranoid* Hmmm…so you liked Punk First-Born? Lol, don't worry. Once they're changed in this fic, they're changed for good! Mwaha.

Doped Out Bunny: WAI! *Hugs* You saved the Conversation! I love you! …In a strictly platonic and completely heterosexual way. Yes. Anyway! D'ya think you could e-mail me a copy? Like I said, I'd like to keep some of it on reference.

Shadowcat832: *Bows* Yes, I am bold. And I am also daring! Mwaha. That's right kiddies, come to me when you want to see something outrageous and appalling! WHOOHOO! Being outside the box is fun, isn't it? Lol, glad you liked the chappie, disturbing-ness and all.

Pilar Sama Aka Gecko: Oh my god, I'm so sorry! I remember when that happened to me a couple of years ago, and I think I mentally scarred my stepsister for life! (Lol, but I won't go into the sordid details…Mwaha.) But YAY! I'm so happy my story cheered you up. That's one of the reasons I keep on writing…*Sniffle* Aw, I'm getting' all choked up! Lol, ya know, you're the first person to tell me that you liked the puns…I thought everyone hated them! *Hugs* *Eyes get big* Wow, I like that idea…I like it a lot…In fact…it's gonna be coming up soon! Heh-heh. I 'spect it'll be the next chappie or the one after…Sound good? Question: Why would a suggestion be the last thing I need? I luv those things! Keep 'em coming! Everyone! ('Cause if ya do, this fic may well be never-ending!) So, anyway. I hope you feel better about your fics. ;_; *Hugs*

Bumblebee-Starscream: WHOO! I ROCK! *Does Happy Dance* *Bows* Glad you liked!

Cgmangotiger: BAH! Lies! They both belong to me! ME I TELL YOU! ALL MINE! *Froths at the Mouth* *Chants* Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! *Pants heavily* However, I thought if I made them both my love puppies, it would be abusing my power as an Authoress far too much…and it would make people mad! Ahhh! So, them together is the next best thing, eh?

OH! And ya know what else I noticed? I forgot a Disclaimer! Silly me…

Disclaimer: Hah! Me own Thir13en Ghosts? It is to laugh. If I owned it, do you really think you would be reading this right now? Nope, 'cause you woulda seen it in the movie. Mwaha.

…Aight, now that we're a good 600 words into the fic, I think it's a good time to start…

OH! One more thing. The next 'Song & Dance Thingy' Will have a song that I'm pretty sure none of you has ever heard of before. It's called 'Freckles' and it's the opening theme for Rurouni Kenshin.

*Clears Throat* No worries though! If you're interested, I can send you the song: It's not long, (Maybe 2 min.) and in MP3 format. And it is in English, for those of you who care. (C'mon, did you honestly think I could do A Parody of a song in Japanese? Puh-lease. I can barely do it to songs in English!)

Okay, now we can start.


::: We're back to the Dark Stage. The Audience is even larger then last time, although it should be noted that they're all wearing helmets and Arrow-resistant armor. Wonder why?:::

Audience: *Coughs and murmurs quietly*

:::Suddenly! In a bright flash of Pyrotechnics, the entire stage lights up in a burst of Blue Flames!:::

Audience Members: *In Awe* Ooh. Ahh.

Pyromaniacs: *_* *Have Reached Nirvana*

::: Of course, First-Born is back on Keyboard! However, he looks a little different then the last time we saw him. He is of course, wearing his Punk Clothes, Sunglasses and Gigantic Headphones. Also, much to the relief of the Audience, now has his Arrow encased in a block of Cement! :::

Audience: *Sigh in Relief…some even remove their helmets…*

::: And, believe it or not, The Angry Princess is back for another round as well. Of course, she doesn't look happy, but then again, does she ever? It should also be noted, that she is hiding what looks suspiciously like a gun behind her back…:::

Audience Members: *Are becoming Curious*

::: The Hammer is on Drums this Time! He is in Ghetto-Wear, of course.:::

Audience Members: *Want To Get the Stupid Show Started*

::: And the reason that Hammer is on Drums tonight, Is because Royce is the main attraction! (Well, when is he not when I'm involved? But you know what I mean…) Woo! He is standing center stage, with a microphone!:::

Audience Members: *Instantly go into 'Rabid Fangirl/Boy; I Gotta Get Me Some O' That!' mode. *

Torn Prince: *Begins in A Breathy Whisper, To the Tune of 'Irresistible' By Jessica Simpson*

You know, I don't know what it is,
But everything about me is so irresistible

Dennis: *Backstage* *Chokes On His Coffee and spits it all over Juggernaut*

Juggernaut: *Shuts his eyes and flicks Coffee and Dennis-Spit off his face…he is obviously counting to Ten.*

Dennis: *Looks Horrified and Runs To the edge of the Curtain, where Jackal is standing, about to eat a cookie.*

Royce: *Workin' The Crowd! Wah-Hoo!*

Don't try and pretend like I'm not your type,
Hah! Too bad you can't fight it,

I make you weak with desire,

Some peeps might diss me and go for Dennis,
Or maybe even Jackal.

But when I make my cute puppy face,
You know you just can't say no.

Jackal: *Lowers His Cookie* Damn straight they go for me.

Dennis: *Notices the Gun in Dana's hand and the Evil, Vengeful look of Unnecessary Violence she's giving Royce…*

Royce: *Oblivious to the imminent Danger…but then again, he's always oblivious…(*Drools*)*

See, I'm irresistible,
But you still can't have me.
I'm unavailable,
But you still want me.
I can't be physical.
I'm just too spiritual,
My ways are powerful,
And irresistible to all.

:::He pulls off a set off dance moves that would give Michael Jackson a Coronary and make N'Sync hang their heads in shame.:::

A Couple Hundred Random Fangirls: *Faint from Blissful Brain Overload*

Angry Princess: *Cackles and Raises the Gun*

Dennis: *Panics and grabs the first thing he sees…which is Jackal's cookie. He runs onstage with it and toward the Angry Princess*

Angry Princess: *Has Eyes closed, for she is preparing to enjoy the oncoming violence.*

Dennis: *Swaps the Gun with the Cookie*


Dennis: *Realizes he's holding a gun, and yelps; tossing it into the crowd*

Angry Princess: *Pulls 'Trigger'. Predictably, nothing happens*

Jackal: *Sees that Dennis is cookie-free, and is frantically searching for his lost treat.*

Angry Princess: *Opens Eyes* *Stunned Silence*

Jackal: *Sees his beloved cookie in Dana's hands.* *Gasps*

Royce: *Starting To Get Mad because the others were ruining 'his' song!*

Hey, I'm a little angel and I'm always right!
What's there not to love about me?
Oh, you can call me a godless tramp,
But I know you're just jealous of my skills!
Don't dare to try and resist me!
Against me it's just a battle of wills!
You know you just can't say no!

Jackal: *Bounds across the Stage towards Dana*

Dana: *Still Utterly Confused* Huh-Wha?…but….the…gun and…duh, Cookie?

Cookie: *Drops some crumbs on the ground*

Dennis: *Backing Away Slowly* Yes, very good Dana. That is a Cookie…

First Born: *Non-chalantly walks up to Dana and takes the cookie. He hums a little tune and walks back to his keyboard*

Jackal: *Was leaping for Dana, but somehow manages to turn around in midair so fast he gives himself whiplash and still lands on his feet*

Random Fan-Person # 234: *Faints as Royce pulls off another amazing stunt*

Royce: *Rather enjoying the effect he's having on those poor fanwhor-I mean, Fangirls*

See, I'm irresistible,
But you still can't have me.

I'm unavailable,
But you still want me.

I can't get physical,
I'm just too spiritual.
My ways are powerful,
And irresistible to all

Jackal: *Advancing On First Born Menacingly* You stole the cookie!

First Born: *Mouth full of Cookie-Goodness* Who me?

Jackal: Yes you!

First Born: *Swallows* Couldn't be!

Jackal: Then who?

First Born: *Shrugs* Okay, I stole it.

Jackal: *Growls* *Goes To tackle First-Born*

First Born: Crap. *Runs, but trips over his baggy jeans, and, you guessed it! Goes sailing into the crowd! *

Royce: *Thinking to himself: "Why, oh why, must I suffer so?"*

When you people try to get close to me,
I remember the things you said…
My Bat's so not that wussy!
Keep it up and I won't even look at you!
Yeah, that's right! Apologize!

Audience: We're Sorry Royce! *Freeze as a scream of Pain & Surprise is heard, followed by a dull thud*

::: Predictably, First Born is once again inflicting pain on Random People. Damn the little tyke. This time, rather then impaling people, however, he's knocking them unconscious with his arr-er, Cement Block. :::

Angry Princess: *Sits down and cries*

Dennis: *Quietly Exits*

Royce: *Half-Heartedly tries to recapture his audience, but failing miserably…Because the ones that haven't been rendered unconscious yet, (By a mixture of First-Born and Royce's ditzy-spiffy-ness…) are stampeding around in a blind panic*

See, I'm irresistible,
But you still can't have me.
I'm unavailable,
But you still want me.
(Dennis: And you can't have him!)
I can't get physical,
I'm just too spiritual.
My ways are powerful,
And irresistible to all.

Jackal: *Sits down and cries right next to Dana*

Angry Princess: *Wails* My dignity!

Jackal: *Wails* My cookie!

Royce: *Stamps his foot, crosses his arms and pouts* My song!

First Born: *Sighs as he is jostled by the stampede, thus breaking many bones and causing much chaos. *

Hammer: *Snore* Shu'p foo' *Snore*

Random Fan-Girl 934: *Screams in Agony*

First Born: *Wincing* Sorry! *Is stepped on* Ow! *Is Sat on* Ah! *Is trampled* @_@

Juggernaut: *Hunting For Dennis*

Dennis: *Realized it was not a good idea to throw a gun into a sea of rabid-Fangirls and is searching for it in the crowd*

First Born: *Is Kicked* …

Angry Princess: *Sobbing* I'll get you Royce! One of these days!

Jackal: *Pouting*

Royce: *Throwing a tantrum*

First-Born: *Clambers back on stage looking beaten* *Scowls at Royce* Who's the tantrum throwing brat now, eh Pretty Boy?

Royce: *Growls and goes to step on First-Born. However, he gets his foot tangled in his microphone, stumbles, and topples offstage*

Crowd: *Notices that First Born is on stage…and Royce is in his place* *Squeal and manage to sound like a carnival ride coming to a stop*

Royce: *Sees crowd barreling toward him* *Sighs* This does not bode well.

Dennis: *Finds The Gun* Now to get this baby to a safe place* *Gun goes off*

Random Fangirl 3039: *Squeals* I GOT HIS BAT! *Screams as the bullet hits her*

Other Fangirls: *Rabidly attack carcass to get the bat*

Royce: *Sees his chance and scrambles away*

Dennis: *Looks at Random Fangirl # 3039* Oopsie. *Gun goes off*

Random Fangirl # 3040: *Goes down with a head wound*

Dennis: Crap! *Hurls gun as far as he can*

Dana: *Sniffle* If only my gun hadn't been turned into a cookie…

:::Gun whales Jackal in the head, bounces, and comes to a rest by Dana's feet:::

Jackal: @_@

Dana: Mwaha. *Picks Up Gun* Now…*Looks around* Oh Royce!

Royce: *Just wants to finish his song and go curl up in a corner and cry*

Who's irresistible?
All clues point straight to me.
It's unavoidable,

I'm too good for you!
I won't get physical,
I'll just stay spiritual.

It doesn't matter much;
I'm still irresistible.

Dana: *Pulls Trigger* DIE!

::: Predictably, as you all know I could never let Royce be hurt in any way, shape or form; the gun is out of ammo:::

Dana: *Vein Pops Out in forehead* I'M GONNA KILL YOU, RAFKIN!

Juggernaut: *Walks onstage* NOT IF I GET TO HIM FIRST!

Dennis: *Squeak* *Grabs Royce, and runs offstage with Dana and Juggernaut close on their heels*

First Born: *Extremely Dizzy* *Stumbles Offstage* I need a nap.

Hammer: *Snore*


Well, wasn't that special?

I have a few things to say about now…and then I have to sleep. It's 4am, dadburnit!



You got me hooked on Jack Off Jill!

Arg! After reading you're fic, I had the sudden irrational urge to download 'Strawberry Gashes'…and it escalated from there! Argitty!

Second: Why is Bologna spelled like that?

Third: Who wants to see Jackal with a puppy? C'mon, you know you want to see him with a puppy!

And Lastly: Torn Prince All.