Rei & Chococat*: PIZZA!!!!

Rei: Sorry. We just had to get that out.


Rei: Meimei? Shut up. We could get sued if we keep using all these advertisements! We need to do a disclaimer!

Disclaimer (Finally.) We don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, or pizza bagels, or anything else we might mention that we don't own. However, we own: Ourselves, and Chococat*'s leprechaun that Rei got her for her birthday. We also own our version of the director. We own our uncreative name of Hector Director. We also own Boss Man and Mitsubishi (the chara not the car). Also we own Mabel the Radiator-Eatin' Clown, when he is Mabel the Radiator-Eatin' Clown. When he is not Mabel the Radiator-Eatin' Clown, we don't own him. So there. Any unmentioned things that we didn't make up, we don't own, and anything we did make up we do own. So there.


Rei: Great. Also, to Jhonen&Simon person…I know you changed your name but I can't remember it now…sorry…I have a really bad memory. Anyway we will try to make Weevil do something smart. But that's not easy in this kind of fic! Plus, he is smart…he's the smartest one in this fic! He's just miserable!

Chococat*: Weer two stewpid the meik sumwun too theeng wiht PIZZA!!!!


Chococat*: PIZZA



Mabel The Radiator-Eatin' Clown: Hyuck, hyuck, hyuck! I've eaten all the radiators in the building! Including the one in my name! Now, theres no heat! Hyuck, hyuck, hyuck!

Yugi: So cold! Cold!!!! ::Is shivering uncontrollably.::

Yami Yugi: It's not that cold. ::Is trying not to shiver.:: It isn't.

Yugi: Yes it is! Where's my sweater? I cant find it! I'm cold…

Honda: We know.

Jounouchi: ACK! I'm cold to!!! Honda gimme your trench coat! ::Rips it off Honda and puts it on.:: Hmm…suddenly I feel pointy…but still cold!

Mai: Why did that stupid clown have to take out the heating in the middle of winter!?

Mabel The Eatin' Clown (He ate the radiator in his name, remember?): Are you talkin' to me? Cos you're talkin' to me, why I'll just have to give you a big squeezy hug!


Mabel The Eatin' Clown: ::Hugs Mai.:: You're cuddly.

Pegasus: Cuddly? Where?!

Mai: LEAVE ME ALONE!!! ::Bashes Mabel The Eatin' Clown and Pegasus on the head, and struggles away from the clown.:: I HATE YOU ALL! WAHHHHH!!!

Grandpa: Awww Mai-chan's having a tantrum again! I remember when she was just a wee little chickpea! She would always do this. Now, Mai, you'd better calm down, or Daddy's gonna have to give you a spankin'.

Mai: ::Runs away crying.::

(Rei's Note: Remember Mai is Yugi's mom? Thus, grandpa is Mai's father!)


Fat Cheerleader: Go Dukey go! Mojo Jojo!

Not Fat Cheerleaders: Yeah Dukey!

Jounouchi: This dog costume is really warm…

Not Fat Cheerleader # 1: I thought you were supposed to yell at us…::Bursts into tears.:: Director Man! He's not doing it right!

Director: ::Is really cold.:: Who cares!? I want a dog costume…oh! Yami Yugi! I couldn't find your entire costume for this scene, so I got this sailor moon dress that I think will work just as well. ::Is wearing Yami's outfit.::

Yami: What? I don't wanna dress up like Sailor Moon! She's creepy! She gives me pimples…

Director: Well she does have a side job as the pimple fairy…but…your gonna dress up like her anyway! ^_^

Yami: Fine…::Grumbles.:: I'll go change…is this a sailor moon outfit or a sailor fuko?

Director: The Sailor Moon one. Yugi gets the fuko!

Yami: But I like fukos… ::His bottom lip starts trembling, and he starts to cry.:: I WANNA WEAR A FUKO!!!!

::Suddenly. Yugi comes in. He is only wearing underwear.::

Yugi: Someone stole my pants!

::All eyes gravitate towards Pegasus.::

Pegasus: What?

Yugi: You took my clothes, didn't you?

Pegasus: Yes…I mean no, no! ::His mouth is filled with Yugi's  clothes.::

Yugi: You ate my clothes! ::Bursts into tears, and starts shivering uncontrollably again.:: I'm so cold…

Yami: Its not that cold!

Yugi: Yes it is! ::At that moment, to prove him right, his tears freeze.::

Yami: You're so pathetic. ::His eyes freeze.:: Ack! Can't blink! Nooo! Doom!

Director: Lets do this scene later… -_-;


Weevil: Oh, and all I have is this little…uh…casserole? Lime? Uvula? Whats my line?

Director: Its BUG you idiot!

Weevil: Um…bug?

Director: Now say it in the line…

Weevil: Oh, and all I have is this little mmmnbug.

Director: Perfect! You said it all smugly, and insidey! Okay, Rex, your line.

Rex: I am not saying my line until I get a bigger trailer!

Director: What do you want with a trailer? You have a room!

Rex: I dunno…I just want one…all I really want is some Chunky Monkey Ice Cream…::Sniff.:: Chunky Monkey…

Director: Just say your line!

Rex: Okay…ha, your Muh-Bug is useless! Thing! Attack!

Dinosaur Thing: Not until I get a bigger trai­­­—::The dinosaur thing froze. Literally. With the ice and stuff.::

Rex: Stupid thing! Start attacking his Muh-Bug! Move! Get your lazy a— ::Freezes.::

Weevil: Where has all the shouting gone? Into Hershey's Shouting & Cream! A mouth full of shouting in every bite! ::Freezes.::


Director: We need to unfreeze these people before they die…or worse, sue! Shizuka: Lets set 'em on fire. Director: No, no, that's so irrational! They'll definitely sue then! Shizuka: It costs lots of money to sue people. You don't pay 'em enough to sue you! Director: Hey, you're right! Lets just let 'em thaw out on their own. I don't wanna touch It! Dinosaur Thing: ::Unfreezes and retreats to card, screaming about how it wanted some Hershey's Shouting and Cream on the way.::

Yami Yugi: I unfroze my eyes! AHHHH my eyes are on fire! AHHHH!!! I'm blind! So very blind!! I am blind with the power of infinite blindness! So very blind indeed! ::Opens eyes.:: Wait…I can see! It's a miracle!

Shizuka: Can we set Rex and Weevil on fire now?

Director: We can do Rex.

Shizuka: Why not It?
Director: If we burn It too much, its smoke might be toxic.

Shizuka: I WANNA BURN IT!!!! ::Starts a throwing a tantrum.:: LET ME BURN IT!!!
Director: No!

Shizuka: Yes!

Director: No!

Shizuka: Yes!

(Rei: And so on and so forth. Eventually they thaw out Rex…and leave Weevil, who eventually thaws out on his own. Rex has third degree burns, and his hat has been burnt badly. Weevil was frozen for so long that he was REALLY cold…and even though being really cold doesn't cause diseases…I don't care! They always do in manga!!! And I LOVE to give people diseases! So there! BWA HA HA HA HA!!! Chococat*: Can I say something? Rei: NO!!!!)


Tomorrow, but its still Friday. We don't know how…but it is. We don't care! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha!

Director: We still need to get that stupid Weevil and Rex scene right. Where the hell are they?

Shizuka: Rex is mourning over his hat and It hasn't woken up yet.

Director: Its 5:30 PM already…how long does that guy sleep? And why are you hanging around me!? Go away!

Shizuka: I thought I was your sunshine, your only sunshine, I make you happy when skies are gray…

Director: Where do you get that idea?

Shizuka: Oniichan told me.

Director: ::Puts hands on hips and goes into 'Like, oh my gawd' mode.:: He is like, so fired!

Shizuka: ::Grins menacingly.::


Director: It has come to my attention that everyone's new favorite candy bar is Hershey's Shouting and Cream. Those are Rex's shouts ya know! You should be paying him gobs and gobs of money! It'll cheer him up anyway; he's very depressed about his hat. But that's not the point of this meeting.

Jounouchi: Then why did you mention it, you idiot? ::Is wearing all of Honda's clothes 

except Honda's underwear. (Boxers that say Barbie™ on them.)

Honda: Joe? Can I please, maybe, possibly, have my clothes back? I'm really cold. ::Shivers.::

Jounouchi: No! You cant! I'll be cold…you don't want your very best friend in the whole wide world to be cold do you? ::Eyes get big and watery and his lower lip is all trembly-like.::

Honda: Well no but… ::Bursts into tears.:: You're making me feel guilty!!!

Jounouchi: Just doing my job!

Director: See, that's the point of the meeting! The lack of heating is causing a lot of problems! Everyone's become dumber, and more annoying! It's impossible to get any work done, because everyone keeps freezing! That stupid radiator-eatin' clown has ruined everything!

Seto: Hey, that radiator-eatin' clown is my brother! He didn't mean it, its all Anzu's fault!

Pegasus: Hey can we have our coffee breaks back? Notice, I've been more insane since you took them away.

Director: Hell no! Do you have any idea how much that coffee costs? TWO CENTS FOR A POUND OF NINE-YEAR-OLD COFFEE BEANS! AND THE MOLD IS EXTRA!!!

Anzu: But the whole thing wasn't my fault!

Mai: I don't think that's the issue anymore.

Anzu: It isn't! It's your fault you stupid director! If you hadn't taken away the coffee breaks, the people would be less insane, and they wouldn't push people off the edge of buildings, Mokuba wouldn't have a broken spine, and I wouldn't have given him the thing that would turn him into Mabel the Eatin' Clown!

Director: It's not my fault! Its Yugi and Pegasus's fault for doing that stupid dance!

Anzu: Wait…it's the authors fault…they're the ones who made them do it!

Yugi: Yeah! I'm not creative enough to dance! I'm boring! Yay! All hail me! Lets sue the authors!

Shizuka: Really, cool!

Mitsubishi: Hi!

Director: Hey where'd you come from?

Mitsubishi: ::Shrugs.:: Lets shoot the authors! Right Randall, sweetie? You wanna shoot those mean ole' authors, don't you?

Director: I don't care anymore! Someone had better think of something to fix all these problems, or I give up! This show is finished! Your all fired!

Honda: Well that's not fair.

::Suddenly, Weevil appears!::

Director: You finally woke up! Okay, get off your lazy ass and we're doing that scene again!

Weevil: I have an idea…::Starts coughing. Whee.::

Mai: Eeew stop that!

::Weevil is still coughing a lot. Mwa ha ha. If you wish to know why, please refer to Rei's sadistic rant. That is all. Fwee.::

Yugi: Um…are you okay?
::Weevil's only response it to cough more. Shizoom.::

Director: Who cares? Everyone go away!


Scene: Everyone has gone back to their rooms, because if they get near Hector Director, they will be fired. In more ways then one. You know with flames and things. Yugi decided to follow Weevil, because he wants to know what his idea is. Also, he actually wants to know 'if he's okay.' Yugi is the only nice person in this entire place! Jeez! Everyone else is going to hell in a hand basket! (I don't know what that means. And I want some popcorn! I like to eat, I like to eat.)

Weevil: Yugi? ::Coughs more. Poor guy looks pretty sicky. (Yes, I mean sicky, not sick, or sickly. SICKY!!!:: Can you go a— ::Cough, cough.:: away? I wanna get back to bed…

Yugi: Um, sure. I was just wondering what your idea was…             

Weevil: Em, I thought we could build a big fire, and it would keep everyone all warm and toasty. ::Cough cough cough.::

Yugi: Ooh, roasty toasty princess, roasty toasty princess! ::Skipping around the room like an evil kangaroo, and reciting lines from Lion King 2::

Weevil: -_-;;;

Yugi: ^_^; Sorry. Hey good idea anyway. You should do it! ::Runs outside.:: EVERYONE LET'S START A GIANT FIRE!!! WEEVIL SAID WE SHOULD!!! LETS KILL EVERYONE!!! (Rei's note: Maybe Yugi is going to hell in a hand basket too. Can anyone tell me what a hand basket is? Chococat*'s Corny Joke: It's a basket you put decapitated hands in! Hyuck, hyuck, hyuck! End of note.)

Weevil: Uh…that's not what I ::cough cough:: meant…

Yugi: It isn't? Oh well! ::Skips off merrily, singing Jingles bells, poison wells, trapped in Mickey D's…(Mr. Fuzzum's Remix, by Devin.)::


Mai: I can't believe It actually had a good idea! And I can't believe my son would want to kill everyone! ::Wipes tear away.:: I'm so proud!

Yugi: I don't wanna kill everyone…

Mai: You said you did like five minutes ago.

Yugi: But…um…well…but…dididid…graham crackers!

Mai: Aren't you afraid of crackers?

Yugi: ::Goes into hour of thinking mode.:: 1 hour later: MOMMY SAVE ME!!! ::Runs behind Mai.::

Mai: Just…hand me some matches…


Jounouchi: Wheee! Spreading explosive lighter fluid all around is fun!

Honda: So is pouring gasoline in an equally everywhere-like place!

Back to mother and son…

Yugi: I hope this works…I'm really cold…::Shivers::

::Mai looks at her freakish child then looks away.::

Yugi: Mama? You think it'll work?

Mai: Yeah…whatever. *I curse the day I ever met that dancing freak what spawned this big-eyed thing! Who the hell was he anyway?* 

Pegasus: HiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiihatshatshatshatshatsSUGARhatsCOFFEEhatshatshatsI'mPegasusJegasusJJawfordCrawfordhatshatshatsiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!::Does not pause for breath once.::

Mai: Um…hi.


Shizuka: Wow its warm and toasty. This fire was such a good idea! I'm glad I thought of it!

Yugi: You thought of it? I thought Weevil thought of it.

Mai: Hush child, for you know not of what evil you speak!

Yugi: He didn't do anything…

Mai: That's the problem! It never participates in our insanity!

Yugi: Well maybe he would if you guys didn't scream when he came near!

Mai: Don't try to logic me! My mind is made up! It stinks, and I don't like it!

Yugi: Your mind does stink.

::Rex walks in quietly, clutching the charred remains of his beloved hat.::

Rex: Hello everyone…

Mai: AHHHHHHHH!!!!! Be gone It's boyfriend!!!!

Rex:  What the hell are you talking about?

Mai: You are going out with It, are you not?

Rex: NO!!!! ::Is blushing.::

Yugi: ::Smirk.:: That means yeh-ess!!

Mai: Sure…right…I believe that…

Rex: Where do you get that sick idea anyway?

Mai: Because if the almighty Rei-sama was doing this herself, it would be so.

Rex: Well thank god for Chococat*!

Rei: ::Comes down from the sky.:: I have half a mind to kill you right now. And another fourth to eat a waffle! The other fourth is conveniently missing! ::Glares.::

Chococat*: ::Comes down after her big sister.:: I'm special, I'm special, I'm special! ::Is dancing.::


Rex: Well you wanna pair me up with that…thing!

Rei: But Haga-kun is so kawaii!

Rex: What?


Rei: ::Claps:: Explosions! YAY!!!!

Director: The buildings exploding! Everyone get out!!!


Director: Okay, is everyone out safe? Um…stupid people? Are you there?

Honda & Jounouchi: HERE!!!

Director: Freakish short thing, are you here?

Yugi: I'm here! Wait a minute; you insulted me, didn't you? ::Bursts into tears.:: THAT WAS MEAN!!!

Director: I don't care! Okay, Dinosaur Hat thing…you there?
Rex: Yeah, I'm here! Wait, no I'm not! Where am I??? AHHHH!!!!

Director: Yes you are.

Rex: Well excu-use me! I thought I was on the planet Borgleschnorpia! But I just have to be here, don't I?

Director: Are cheap slut and stupid tea girl here?

Mai & Anzu: Yup we're here! Don't mind us, we don't think we're on some obscure planet, don't worry!

Director: Is dancy-psycho-freako-singy-man here?

Pegasus: Why yes!

Director: Is 'that's my line I'll kill you' cursy man here?

Bakura and Yami Bakura: We are here!!! Which one of us are you talking to?

Director: I dunno, your same. Is Big Christmas Tree haired freako here?

Yami Yugi: Yep!

Director: What about Bitch-sister-of-stupid-guy?

Shizuka: Present!

Director: And Car-lady-Randall-lover?

Mitsubishi: Here! And Randally-Wandally is here too!

Director: What about It? Is It here?


Yugi: Wasn't he still sleeping?

Mai: It isn't human! It doesn't need to sleep!

Yugi: Well I think he was sick…

Director: Right sure…like any self-respecting disease would go near It. We all know that's impossible. Anyway, if It's still inside then It's probably dead.

Yugi: Wouldn't that be bad?

Director: No. Anyway, you all have somewhere to go? I don't care. Leave. Go home to your mommies. You cant live here anymore. I'll contact you when we get a new building.

Rex: But I like it here.

Director: It exploded.
Rex: That's why I like it here!


Seto: Okay…Mabel the Eatin' Clown…I'm sure you don't remember being Mokuba, but you're going to have to go home with me like you would if you were him.

Mabel the Eatin' Clown: Can I have a radiator? I need one for my name.

Seto: There will be some at home. But don't eat the whole heating system, okay?

Mabel the Eatin' Clown: But I wanna, I wanna, I wanna! I really wanna!

Seto: Too bad. Lets get on the train now.

Mabel the Eatin' Clown: Whats a train? Is it a type of radiator?


Grandpa: Well, Mai, you want to come with me and Yugi, being as you're my daughter and all?

Mai: Hell no! I'd rather be a hobo then live with you freaks one second longer!
Grandpa: Okay that settles it, you're moving in!


Yugi: Yay! My mommy's going to live with me!

Grandpa: Why do you care?
Yugi: I don't know!!!! YAY!!!!

Yami Yugi: Can I come too?

Yugi: I guess…I wish you wouldn't though.

Grandpa: OF COURSE YOU CAN!!! ::Hugs him. More like strangling though.::


Jounouchi: Honda, you come live with me and Zuzu. Your parents apparently got hit by a Honda.

Honda: I killed my parents? I'm evil! CURSE THE DAY I WAS BORN!!!! AHHHH!

Jounouchi: No, a car…not you.

Honda: Oh. ^_^ Hehe. Oh that's bad! I miss my mommy and daddy!

Jounouchi: Well they're not dead; they're just in comas. So live with us for a bit.

Honda: Why didn't you tell me? Your mean!

Shizuka: I don't want him to live with us! You'll ignore me…T_T

Jounouchi: We'll have Anzu live with us too! She can pay attention to you!

Anzu: I'll do what now?

Jounouchi: Live with us!
Anzu: Okay, my mom doesn't like me anyway.


Jounouchi: Weren't you evil?

Bakura: Oh yeah! I'll let Yami do that from now on. I wanna be kawaii! Yay! And dumb!

Yami Bakura: I'll kill you all.

Jounouchi: You can all live with me!



Sam: And Sam!

Rex: Right. Hey, Sam, where am I gonna go?
Sam: I don't know, I'm just a stuffed cat.

Rex: Oh.


Pegasus: *I wonder where I should go…* I KNOW! I'll go to Disneyland! Where all your dreams come true! And eat some candy! Like a monkey! Yay! But first I shall dig up Cecelia's grave and take her corpse with me! Then I'll just dig through the Earth and wind up in America or Canada or some such place! And then go to Sea World! Where Disneyland is! Yay! What a happy vacation!

Random Minion: What are you talking about?

Pegasus: I'm just brushing my teeth, that's all.


Scene: The flames have been extinguished. Boss Man's office is still floating, but the rest of the building has been annihilated. And Weevil has regained consciousness after being exploded to the playground nearby. He landed on some kid playing on the slide and traumatized them for life. He was brought to the hospital and is probably going to be okay. But nobody knows that. Right now, the director is standing by the remains of the building and mourning over his lost studio.

Director: *My life! My work!! Its all turned to this…this…poop! My life is poop! And one of my stupid employees just had to go and be killed in the explosion! It was a good It. We didn't give It enough credit. But MY STUDIO!!!!! AHHHHHH!!!!*


Mitsubishi: Randall?

Randall: Yeah?

Mitsubishi: Lets go assassinate the president of America.

Randall: Okey dokey.

Mitsubishi: Then we'll live in jail!

Randall: Yay!


Mrs. Kaiba: Seto! Moku—who the hell is that? Wheres Mokuba?

Seto: This is him. Anzu turned him into Mabel the Eatin' Clown.

Mrs. Kaiba: Well I am so gonna kill her! I don't believe this! My son is a clown! I hate clowns! Whats up with that? And why are you here anyway?

Seto: The studio exploded. Can we live here?

Mrs. Kaiba: Well of course you can! But only if you change your underwear daily.

Seto: I'll try…

Mrs. Kaiba: Mabel…will you change your underwear daily?

Mabel the Eatin' Clown: Is underwear a type of radiator?

Mrs. Kaiba: Yes, yes it is.

Seto: I didn't know that! I've been wearing radiators?

Mrs. Kaiba: Shut up Seto. You're just an idiot.

Seto: Okay Mommy! I love you!

Mrs. Kaiba: You'd better.


Yami Yugi: So this is a house?

Grandpa: No, it's a store. The house is upstairs.

Mai: You haven't moved out of this dump yet?

Grandpa: I still own the store, I can't move out of it.

Mai: Yes you can! You just wouldn't be able to wear your pajamas to work anymore!

Yugi: And I really wish you wouldn't do that anyway.

Yami Yugi: So you guys are gonna be my slaves, right?

Grandpa: Um…no?

Yami Yugi: Then who's gonna be my slaves? And if your not gonna be my slave then who's slave are you gonna be?

Yugi: Um…no ones?

Yami Yugi: You've got to be my slave. Everyone has to be a slave of someone, except people who have slaves!

Yugi: Maybe we'd be the wall's slaves?

Grandpa: Listen, fine, we'll be your slaves.

Mai: What? I don't wanna be his slave! It'll mess up my hair!

Grandpa: Well then you can be Fred's slave.

Mai: Who's Fred?

Grandpa: ::Points to a sock on the floor.:: That.

Mai: I'd rather be Yami's slave.

Yami Yugi: I got me some slaves! Yeah baby! Now start slavin'!


Rei's Note: I hear tell rumor that Jounouchi's first name is Katsuya instead of the other way around. But I don't know. So I don't confuse my self, Jounouchi's mom is going to MissWheeler. Also, I am aware he doesn't live with his mom but I don't care. He's going there anyway.

Jounouchi: Hi Mommy!

::Miss Wheeler is not there.::

Shizuka: Mom?

::Still not there.::

Jounouchi: Aw crap. Aw well, she wont care that we suddenly started living here and that we invited a bunch of people she doesn't like to live here too.

Shizuka: Of course not!

Bakura: Your mommy doesn't like me? And after all I've done for her!

Jounouchi: Our mommy doesn't know you.

Bakura: ::Smiles.:: Oh!

Honda: She doesn't like me?

Shizuka: Oh no, she's in love with you. She has a shrine to you! Wanna come see?

Honda: Not really.

Anzu: Bacon is cool.


Pegasus: Dig a hole, dig a hole, dig a hole! ::Is attempting to dig his way to America with a stale waffle as a shovel.::

::Out pops a very old man who look like Pegasus.::

VOMWLLP: Hello. Who are you? I am Somebody Jomebody J. Jawford Crawford. You look familiar.

Pegasus: I do? Cool! I think you're familiar too! Aren't we all so familiar!

Somebody Jomebody J. Jawford Crawford: Hey…aren't you that good for nothing daughter of mine who moved to Japan to be an actress?

Pegasus: Are you that good for nothing mother of mine who went to the goldmines of Neptune and won the 1873 Pickanose Contest and received the 11th commandment from a swirling vortex of light?

Somebody Jomebody J. Jawford Crawford: Why yes!

Pegasus: ::Hugs him.:: DADDY!

Somebody Jomebody J. Jawford Crawford: SON!

Pegasus: Wanna come to Disneyland with me?

Somebody Jomebody J. Jawford Crawford: I was just there, but sure!

Pegasus: Yay!


Rex: Hey pretty lady with the high-healed shoes! And the glaven, and the laven and the thing with the glaven, ah hi!

Man who is wearing loafers: Get off my doorstep!

Rex: Can I live in your house?


Rex: Fine, I'll go live with my mom!

MWIWL: You'd rather live with some guy you'd never met then with your mom?

Rex: Yes!
MWIWL's Mommy: Bartholomew! Get in here and massage my armpits! NOW!!! And who's that nice young man at our doorstep? He's pretty!

Bartholomew: Come to think of it, can I live with you?
Rex: Sure. But you have to carry Sam.

Bartholomew: Who's Sam?
Rex: This thing. ::Holds out stuffed blue cat.::

Bartholomew: You know what? You'll never be as fat as me!

Rex: Good.


Mitsubishi: ::Is being hauled off by the police.:: Hey! I didn't even do anything yet! What's with you? Let me go!

Randall: ::Shoots.:: MOMMY!!!

Policeman: AHHH!! IT SHOT ME!!! AHHH!!!

Mitsubishi: YAY! ::Runs away to kill the president.::


Weevil: ::Wakes up.:: Where am I? Is that a rooster? Am I late for work again?

Hospital Doctor-type-person: You're in the hospital, theres no rooster, and I have no idea.

Weevil: What am I doing in a—OWWWWWWW….zzzzzzz….zzzzzzz…

HDTP: Don't ask too many questions, or you get the tranquilizer! Rawr!

More qualified hospital doctor-type-person: What do you think you're doing? Did you just uselessly tranquilize another patient?


Weevil: Hey…::In a pouty voice.:: I thought you said their wasn't a rooster!

HDTP: I thought you were asleep!

Weevil: I woke up…

MQHDTP: Maybe you'd best go back to sleep now. ::Tranquilizes him.::

HDTP: YOU HYPOCRITE!!! ::Lunges for MQHDTP's throat.::

::The two have an epic battle. Weevil keeps waking up, and in his disoriented state, asking about the price of turnips in New Zealand.::


Seto: I LOVE THIS SHOW!!! I haven't watched Seventh Heaven in sooooo long! Mo—I mean, Mabel, don't you love this show?

Mabel: ::Is transforming back into Mokuba.:: Whicchit-whacchit-richet-fichett!!

Seto: Might I ask what the hell you're talking about?

Mokuba: Oh my god…my spine…Owwwww….god that hurts!!! Owwwie mommy!

Mrs. Kaiba: Yes? ACK! My Moku's back! ::Hugs Mokuba.::

Mokuba: AHHHHHH!!!! Don't touch my spine! STOP!!!

Mrs. Kaiba; Your not Mabel anymore! Yay!

Mokuba: What? Who's Mabel?

Mrs. Kaiba: Well, surely you remember. You turned into Mabel the radiator-eatin' clown!

Mokuba: What? I don't like clowns! Save me! By the way, Mommy, what are you doing at work?

Seto: ::Puts hand on Mokuba's spine.:: The building exploded, and we're at home with mom now.

Mokuba: AHHHHHHHH!!!! YOU DID THAT ON PURPOSE!!!!! I HATE YOU!!!! ::Bursts into tears and tries to run away but is pretty much paralyzed from spine injury. His spine still hurts and its already Friday! Only happened three days ago! Jeez…)

Seto: Whats up with him? All I did was touch his spine in the place it hurt the most in hopes of making him cry! Sheesh, what a little wimpo!


Yami Yugi: Okay slaves! Make me a sandwich! And make it the best sandwich I've ever eaten, or else!

Mai: Or else what?

Yami: Or else I'll dye your hair turquoise in your sleep.

Mai: NOOOOOOOO!!!! Do not touch my lovely blond locks of locksyness!

Yugi: Actually you wouldn't look half bad with turquoise hair.

Mai:  You want me to dye your hair magenta?

Yugi: ::Eyes get huge. There is barely room for his nose and mouth anymore, so his eyes cover them and now its hard to breathe.:: *gasp* You…*gasp* wouldn't…*gasp* Would you? *gasp*

Mai: I would! I've got the dye right here! And why're you gasping so much?

Grandpa: Oh dear, this has happened before!  His eyes are so big they're covering his nose and mouth so he cant breathe. Kind of sad actually.

Mai: Oh, well then. I don't care.

Yami: Why am I not consuming a sandwich at this moment?

Mai: Cos your not. Why don't you get your own sandwich?

Yami: Because I'm too lazy! Duh! Jeez, what do you take me for! I used to be a pharaoh! I can't be bothered to make my own sandwich!

Yugi: ::Is turning blue.:: Cant…hhhhnnnn *gasp* breathe…must…*gasp* have…hhhhnnnn…air….*gasp*

Mai: Will someone just shut him up? I have to go do my nails.

Yami: No! You have to be my slave. I'm hungry…make me a sandwich…

Mai: ::Is momentarily blessed with turning-people-into-sandwiches powers. Turns annoying Yami into a sandwich.:: Theres your goddamn sandwich! Now shut up and get me a sandwich!

Yami the Sandwich: You cannibal! Barbarian! Nasty person!

::No one notices or cares when Yugi faints from lack of air. Yami is still a sandwich.::


::Jounouchi and the gang (Rei's note" I never thought I'd stoop so low as  to call them that. I hate using that term. It sounds so pokemon-y. {Although I like pokemon. Sort of. Mostly cos our mom works at NYC's pokemon center store.} Anyway at least I didn't say Yugi and the gang. So overused!) Anyway, so Jounouchi and the gang have been playing Weasely Adventures, Legacy of Goku, and Telephone Pole of Judgment for the last 15 hours. Their eyes are beginning to fall out.::

Honda: ACK! I cannot see! Where are my eyes!? I cannot find them! And I have no eyes with which to look for them!

Shizuka: Well that's what you get for hogging the game the last 7 ½ hours—OWWWWWWW!!! Oniichan, Honda just poked my eyes out with his hair!!! AHHHHH!!!!!

Jounouchi: Can't listen, must complete goal and reach the telephone pole of judgment before its too late!

Shizuka: I cant see! Goddamn you Honda!

Jounouchi: Wait…my eyes fell out too!
Anzu: Mine too! And I only played Legacy of Goku for five minutes until someone ::Glares meaningfully at Bakura.:: thought the game cartridge was a pastry and ruined it forever!

Yami Bakura: This is becoming a strange theme

Anzu: Shut up, its your turn to play Weasely Adventures.

Yami B: I would, but my eyes just fell out! I can't see anything!

Anzu: Well it's your fault you were playing Telephone Poll of Judgment the whole time. Jounouchi only just got his turn and now his eyes have fallen out.

Yami B: Listen none of us can see, so lets just go be read to the elderly or some such thing.

Jounouchi: What are you talking about?

Yami B: I dunno. Lets just go get some popcorn…

Anzu: I'm game!

Shizuka: Yeah! Now lets go kick some cheddar cheese ass!
Yami B: What?

Bakura: I have eyes!

Yami: Well whoopdidoo, why don't you read us a bedtime story then?

Bakura: Okay! What do you want, the Little Engine That Could But Wouldn't, or the Lorax?

Jounouchi: Lorax! I love the Lorax…especially the live action movie! (We are aware that there is no such thing. There should be! The Lorax is cool!)

Shizuka: You still sleep with you Barbaloot plushie don't you? (We hope we spelled Barbaloot right. They're the ones who eat truffula fruits.)


All: We've known for six years.

Bakura: Once upon a time, there was a cat in the hat and he was named Eric. And he went "Eric, Eric, Eric, Bob, Eric, Eric, Eric, Myrtle, Eric" all the livelong day. He grew up to be a truffula fruit eaten by a Barbaloot in his Barbaloot suit. Then he said quack. And then I came, and did a little dance, made a little flub, get down tonight, yeah, get down tonight! Do do do, ow! ::Does little freaky dance.::

Jounouchi: Your reading it wrong! ::Bursts into tears.:: The Lorax has been violated! Noooo!

Bakura: I don't know how to read…

Yami B: ::Has been wandering around and has just crashed into something.:: OW! Whats this bloody mother-fucking wall doing here?

Shizuka: That bloody mother-fucking wall is my mother.

Anzu: How do you know? You don't have eyes, you cant see!

Shizuka: Neither can you!

Miss Wheeler: Who are these people? And what're the two of you doing here? And where are all your eyes?

Jounouchi: They fell out. We were playing video games.

Miss Wheeler: How many times do I have to tell you not to do that you ungrateful brat? I specifically told you before you left not to play Legacy of Goku, Weasely Adventures, or Telephone Poll Of Judgment! And what do I see you playing now?

Shizuka: Buggo?

Miss Wheeler: And what are you doing here?

Jounouchi: The studio exploded, so we came here.

Miss Wheeler: And who are these ungodly creatures? And what is beautiful, wonderful, gorgeous Honda doing here?

Jounouchi: Well this ungodly creature is Bakura, and this ungodly creature is Yami Bakura. And I believe you know the ungodly creature named Anzu. And beautiful, wonderful, gorgeous Honda isn't so beautiful, wonderful, or gorgeous as you think he is. He wears rubber pants in case he has an accident!

Honda: Oh yeah, well Jounouchi enjoys eating spinach!

Shizuka: How dare you say that about my brother!

Miss Wheeler: Everyone, just shut up and put your eyes back in.::

All: Okay Mom/Miss Wheeler…


Rei: By the way, somebody is not just any somebody; he is Somebody Jomebody J. Jawford Crawford, Peggy-poo's daddy.

Tinkerbell001: Hello and welcome to Disneyland!!!!!!!!!! Where all your dreams, no matter how ungodly, murderess and sticky they seem, come true!! Now, how many tickets would you like?

Somebody: We would like five please.

Tinkerbell002: Wait a minute… I know you! You're that guy who mooned Mickey Mouse!

Tinkerbell001: I thought we kicked him out!

Somebody: Uh… are you trying to say that corpses are free?

Tinkerbell001&002: Corpses are extra!

Pegasus: Well, we have absolutely no money, so we'll just take those five tickets now!

Tinkerbell001: ::Whispers to 002:: I think they're trying to swindle us!

Tinkerbell002: Great! We haven't been swindled in ages! Right this way please sir! And may I say, that's quite a lovely corpse you've got there.

Pegasus: She is my true love…

Somebody: Awww that's sooo sweet! Pig slop is mine! Can't get enough of that pig slop!


Mitsubishi: Mr. Bush? I have to kill you now.

George Bush: Why d'ya have to do that? ::Drools.::

Mitsubishi: Come to think of it, I have no idea. I'm leaving. Goodbye.

::As she leaves she is arrested. How anti-climactic.::

Mitsubishi: My mommy said she would get me a car for my birthday if I didn't get arrested! This isn't fair! Now I won't get that red 'vette I wanted!!!! WAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!    

George: Well, then I guess we'll have to rethink this. Men! Put her in the crazy house!


George: Sure, sure. 


Weevil: Hello?

Director: I am here for your soul!

Weevil: Wait…Mr. Director? What're you doing here?

Director: I said I'm here for your soul. Don't you listen?

Weevil: Umm…why?

Director: I got a part-time job as the Grim Reaper while they're fixing up the building. It's fun.

Weevil: But I'm not dead…

Director: Yes you are. Your diseasy-thing got really bad and you died but you didn't notice because you were all high on those tranquilizers so you didn't notice.

Weevil: I'm not dead…I'm alive…

Director: God…I hate dealing with Its in denial. Your dead as dead can get Weevil!

Weevil: But I'm really not—

Director: Too bad! ::Vacuums out his soul. With an actual vacuum cleaner.::


Rex: So Bartholomew, whats your name?

Bartholomew: Well, certainly not Bartholomew if that's what you're thinking. I always thought it was Fido. That's what my mom calls me.

Rex: Oooh I have a dog named Fido! I also have a dog named Clean Socks, a dog named Not Clean Socks, and their daughter, Socks That Are So Stinky They're Alive. And also a dog named Dog. And a dog named Cat. And a dog named Dog-Cat, and numerous other dogs with strange names.

Bartholomew: Why don't we go meet your dogs?

Rex: Okay! I don't know where my house is though.

Bartholomew: I know where it is! Its there!
Rex: Hey you're actually right! That is my house! Mommy! ::Ring doorbell::

Doorbell: ::Starts playing Dixie Land.:: LOOK AWAY, LOOK AWAY, LOOK AWAY, DIXIE LAND!!!
Rex: Doory hasn't learned to sing since I left. Nothings changed! Whats up with that?

::Suddenly, the door creaks on its hinges. It opened!::

Shadow in the Darkness: FIDO!!!



Chococat*: But that's not a good thing, I love Fri-Day-Oh.

Rei: Who cares what you think? Anyway, stay tuned for Sat-Ur-Day-Oh!!!!

Chococat*: That's too long. Cant it just be Sat-On-Oh? Please don't ask me what Sat-On-Oh is cos I know you will.

Rei: Whats Sat-On-Oh?

Chococat*: Well you can just go to the movie theater and buy over priced candy and orange soda!

Rei: Anyways, stay tuned to find out the outcome of the various scenes. Who is this mysterious figure in the darkness who yells 'FIDO'? What kind of horrors will ensue in Disney Land? Is Weevil really dead? And what is that thing gnawing on my leg?

Chococat*: I thought it was gnawing on my leg!

Rei: Oh shut up. Okay, byeeeee!!!!