SPIDER-MAN and OOLA
by Gunman

Disclaimer: I do not own Spider Man or Star Wars.

Summery: Spider-Man gets teleported to Jabba's Palace, ending up in the Rancor Pit the same time as the female Twi'lek dancer Oola and must use his powers to save her.

Idea from wereknight.

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Chapter 1
Meet The Twi'lek Dancer

Spider-Man blinked his eyes open, looking around and noticing that there was something wrong.

He was not where he should have been.

The last thing he remembered was he was helping the Fantastic Four battle Doctor Doom and his new plot to destroy the Four and take over the world. Doom was trying to activate his trans-dimensional portal and escape, only to have the energy surge swallow him and Doom whole.

Now, he didn't know where he was.

"Wake up! Wake up! Please!" a female voice shouted as a pair of green hands pushed against him.

"Wha... huh?" Spider-Man groaned.

"Unhand Me, Monster! None shall devour Doom!" a familiar mechanical voice shouted as a beast's growl was heard.

"Oh, no. Doom's here?" Spider-Man groaned as he blinked open his eyes, looking up and gasping.

Dr Doom, dressed in his gray armor and green hood, cape, and tunic, was struggling in the grip of a large creature he had never seen before. It was a good 10 meters tall, brownish leathery skin, large claws on four fingers of each hand, a large mouth filled with teeth. In its right hand was Doom, whose arms were pinned against his sides as the beast snarled at him.

"Once I get my hands free, I will destroy you!" Doom shouted at the monster.

"He's really not arguing with... yes he is." Spider-Man groaned as he forced himself up.

Looking to his right, he saw a shapely, green-skinned alien woman wearing a flimsy net costume loosely held together by narrow leather strips. Her most distinguishing feature was her two long head-tails that draped down behind her. She looked at him with fear. Not fear of him, but of the monster that was holding the devious Dr Doom.

Spider-Man understood why she was afraid. She was worried she was going to be next on the menu.

"What is that thing?" he asked the woman.

"Rancor!" the woman shouted.

The monster roared as it bit down upon Doom's armor and head.

"Oh, man!" Spider-Man groaned as the Rancor was electrocuted by the armor. The beast growled and hurled the armored autocrat against the wall of its cavern.

A sickening thud was heard as Doom's body slammed against the rock walls, his body dropping down into the dirt and sand.

"Ouch." Spider-Man said with a wince as he looked at the unconscious form of the sorcerer/scientist who had given him and his allies a world of headaches.

The green-skinned woman tugged on his arm. Spider-Man looked at her as she pointed at the giant monster that was lumbering towards them.

"Right. Monster." he said nonchalantly, his mind still reeling from his sudden transportation to this strange place. "Stay here." he said, ushering the woman away, telling her to get back as he rushed towards the beast.

He leapt forward and rolled under the Rancor's legs and jumped back to his feet as the beast turned around and lunged at him again.

"Gotta take this thing down fast and hard!" Spider-Man shouted as he leapt up onto the creature's right arm and jumped up onto its shoulder.

The Rancor roared at the red and blue garbed human, who suddenly leapt forward, punching the beast in the jaw with a solid right cross with his fist. The Rancor roared in pain, its head jerking slightly to the side, as if in a daze, as Spider-Man attacked again, punching its forehead right between the eyes, stunning the mighty monster and causing it to tumble onto its back.

What's more, it landed right on top of Dr Doom.

Spider-Man jumped off of the beast, his hand swelling with pain.

"Ouch! That thing's head has got to be mostly bone." he grumbled as he was suddenly glomped by the green-skinned alien woman who hugged him tightly.

"Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!" she cried as she hugged him tightly, burying her head into the crook of his neck.

"Uh... you're welcome." he gasped as the woman started crying. "Hey. Hey it's alright." he said as he hugged the woman back.

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Within minutes of his victory over the monstrous Rancor, Spider-Man and the green-skinned woman found themselves cuffed by a group of strange-looking humanoid creatures brandishing weapons and brought before a large slug-like creature who looked upset.

Actually, Spider-Man couldn't tell if the slug was upset, but its tone suggested as such.

The slug-like creature shouted something he didn't understand, and seconds later a gold-plated humanoid robot appeared next to it.

"Yes, yes. I am here, your worshipfulness. Yes?" the gold robot asked.

The slug-like creature started shouting at the robot, but Spider-Man got the feeling that it was talking about him.

"The high exalted Jabba the Hutt, demands to know who you are and what you have done to his pet Rancor." the gold robot asked him.

"Uh... my name is Spider-Man, and I knocked out that... did you say 'pet'?" Spider-Man asked the robot.

"Yes I did. Well, he did." the robot said.

"And he was planning to feed it... with us?" the webslinger asked.

"Well, to be quite honest, you just appeared out of nowhere when Ms Oola was dropped into the pit." the gold robot explained.

The large slug, now identified as Jabba, shouted something at him again, the gold robot translated.

"His great excellence, the mighty Jabba the Hutt, has found you guilty of assault to his Rancor, and has declared you to be executed by the end of the week." the gold robot said.

"Really? I just get here, save my own neck, and the life of this lovely lady, from being eaten by a monster, and you're gonna execute me for that?" Spider-Man gasped.

"Yes." the robot said. "I mean, I'm not, the great Jabba is."

Jabba shouted something else at the webslinger.

"And... Ms Oola as well. Since she was saved from the Rancor, by you, she will be executed along with you at a predetermined time. For now you shall be placed in prison cells to await execution." The gold droid said.

Spider-Man glared at the robot, more than a little curious as to why he seemed so... human? He was skittish and nervous and cowardly. Like an obedient servant. Maybe it was just his programming?

"Eaten by a monster, or executed for punching out said monster. What crazy world did Doom bring us to?" he muttered to himself as he and the green-skinned woman, now identified as Oola, were lead away from the main throne room.

The pair were ushered into the lower levels of Jabba's palace, seeing dozens of prison holding cells which held various other alien creatures, each of whom were snarling and snapping at the new arrivals.

They were pushed into a small cell with only one bed and what seemed to pass for a toilet. Actually, the 'bed' looked like a flat slab made of sandstone with only a dusty old pillow to rest your head. The guards undid their cuffs and left them alone, closing the steel-grate door behind them.

"Well, I can't say I like the accommodations, but considering I'm gonna be executed soon, it could be worse." Spider-Man quipped as he rubbed his wrists.

"Thank you." Oola said to him as she sat down on the bed.

"'Thank you'?" he asked as he looked at her. "I unintentionally signed your death warrant as well as my own. And all for saving our lives." he said.

"I was already dead, when Jabba dropped me into that Pit. I should be dead now. But it is still better than what I faced every day of my life." she said.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I am a slave. Tricked into dancing here in Jabba's palace. You don't know what I have been through in my years here." she explained.

"Tell me." he said as he sat next to her.

Oola sighed as she told Spider-Man of her life. How she was tricked by a fellow Twi'lek named Bib Fortuna into serving as Jabba's dancer and slave, who made it sound like palace life was glamorous and exciting. And Oola herself naïvely thought she could leave whenever she wanted. Aside from dancing for Jabba, wearing her incredibly revealing outfit, she would also have to pleasure him whenever he wanted. She told him how she was miserable, how she had been defiled, fed scraps, and brutalized by the guards in order to make her more subservient to the slimy Hutt, whom Peter learned was actually a gangster, a term he was familiar with.

She had spent a long time here, and wanted nothing more than to escape this horrible life.

She had heard, from the gold robot, called C-3PO, that a Jedi Knight named Luke Skywalker was on his way to bargain for the release of his friends.

That had given Oola so much hope that she danced the greatest dance of her life, which unfortunately had enticed Jabba into wanting more than a dance from her, which she utterly refused, and caused her to be dropped into the Rancor Pit to be eaten.

That was when she saw that there were already two other people in the Pit.

We arrived right before she was dropped into the Pit. Spider-Man realized. And no one noticed?

Then he thought better of it.

It's where they probably dump their garbage. For disposal. Spider-Man thought.

Spider-Man was suddenly broken out of his mental musings, when he felt his mask being pulled up past his mouth, right before his lips were smashed by the full, pouty lips of Oola. His eyes went wide as Oola's arms wrapped around his neck, her body straddling his as she deepened the kiss.

He was so shocked, he didn't have the strength or desire to pull away from her.

A minute later, as Oola broke the kiss, Spider-Man just stared at the woman.

"What... why... did you kiss me?" he gasped, trying to regain his thoughts at what she had just done.

"I was thanking you, for saving my life." she said in a husky tone.

"But... you don't know me and you..."

"We may die tomorrow. Or the day after. And with everything I've been through, I just want..." she started to explain.

Spider-Man sighed as he understood what she was talking about.

After everything she had been through, being a slave and being abused and almost being eaten, this was a reprieve from that life. Almost like a rescue.

Spider-Man sighed as he pulled his arms around the woman and hugged her close, even as his left hand reached up and pulled his mask fully off of his head.

Oola just looked at his face, glad that her savior was a handsome young man with soft brown hair and kind hazel eyes. She smiled as she leaned in, kissing his cheek before resting her head on his shoulder, her arms coming up underneath his own to hold onto him tightly.

"My name... is Peter Parker." he whispered to her.

"And I am Oola." she whispered back to him, properly introducing herself this time.

It didn't matter to her if he had two names or not. Right now, she had a friend and even a protector, which was far more than she ever had since being brought to Jabba's palace.

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It was 24-hours later, and both Peter and Oola had grown closer in their captivity.

They were currently lying together on the stone bed, the sexy Twi'lek dancer curled up against her handsome protector, drawing comfort from him after a horrible life as Jabba's slave.

Peter had been up for a couple hours, just thinking.

The cell bars were stronger than they looked, but Peter was sure he could have broken them off their hinges and escaped with Oola. He could take out the guards, that wasn't a problem. But protecting Oola would be an issue, especially when he learned that Jabba's palace was in the middle of a desert and he didn't know how to pilot a speeder or a transport to the nearest space port. Then there was the issue of money to get passage on a ship, especially one they could trust.

They would most likely be captured by Jabba's forces if they tried to escape, or by Tuskin Raiders, (according to Oola, who had heard about them), or any other monster or alien creature that existed on this planet. And if that didn't do it, the heat and arid desert environment would claim them.

And after learning they were on an alien planet, Peter was incredibly worried that they weren't going to make it anywhere safe. Especially since the Hutts controlled the whole planet.

Peter eventually accepted that he was in a completely different universe, one that he didn't know anything about, except what Oola had told him, and her knowledge was seemingly limited.

To make matters worse, they had no supplies, no allies except the other prisoners and Peter wasn't sure they could be trusted. This didn't include Dr Doom, however, who was declared dead when the Rancor's keeper brought Jabba the remains of his crushed armor and body.

The keeper actually had the decency to inform Peter of this, showing him Dr Doom's crushed metal gauntlet, with his hand still inside it.

Peter actually winched at seeing it.

Doom would have been the only one to get them back to their universe, and since he had no way of knowing if Reed or the other brainiacs from his world were even trying to get him back, he realized he was stuck.

After thinking about it, Peter actually wondered if it wouldn't have been easier for them to just leave him in this world to die.

That was a depressing thought, but it was something he had to accept.

Then again, if he didn't find a way out of this mess, both he and Oola would be executed. Peter let out a sigh as he looked at Oola, who was resting with her head on his chest. She just seemed happy, which she had never been since becoming a slave.

Having been told of her life before he arrived, Peter wondered if this was the first time she had ever been happy in all the years since being brought to this place.

Just then, their cell door opened up.

The large, green-skinned, pig-faced guards were holding out a pair of cuffs, grunting and waving for them to step out of the cell.

The instructions were clear enough for Peter. Gently waking his sleeping companion up, the pair were cuffed and led out to a waiting hovercraft-like vehicle that Peter had never seen before.

Oola called it a skiff. They were joined by two other human prisoners and a large Sasquatch-like creature who were also cuffed like they were. There were also four guards keeping watch over them.

The group was bunched up together, which allowed them to talk.

"So... what did they get you for?" the sandy-blond haired young man in black clothes asked.

"Self-defense, actually." Peter said. "I'm Peter Parker and this is Oola." he introduced.

"Those are my friends, Han Solo and Chewbacca. And I'm Luke Skywalker." he said, introducing his fellow prisoners and himself.

At hearing this, Oola looked over and gasped. She hadn't recognized Luke right away, her mind more preoccupied with how Peter would protect her.

This was the Jedi Knight who was coming to save his friends, and possibly rescue her.

Peter looked at the young man, realizing the same thing that Oola was thinking.

"Does this mean you have a plan to get us out of here?" Peter asked.

"I do. Any enemy of Jabba's is a friend of ours." Luke said.

"Good to know. How can I help?" Peter asked.

"Just stick close to the others. When the fighting starts, try to keep control of this skiff." he said to the young man.

"You know, I think my vision's actually getting better." Han said, standing on the other side of Luke. "Instead of a big dark blur I can see a big light blur."

"There's nothing to see. I used to live here, you know." Luke said.

"You're gonna die here, you know? Convenient." Han said.

"Just stick close to Chewie and Lando. I've taken care of everything."

"Oh. Great." Han said sarcastically.

Eventually the skiff, which was being followed by another skiff filled with Jabba's guards and a large sailing barge that Jabba was obviously on, reached their destination.

Looking over the edge of the skiff carefully, Peter saw a large pit in the sand with some kind of large creature inside it. The creature seemed almost plant-like, it had a strange looking beak-shaped mouth protruding from the center, and several tentacles reaching out of the pit itself.

"Oh great! Out of the mouth of a Rancor, and into the mouth of... what is this thing?" Peter asked aloud.

"It's called a 'Sarlacc Pit'." Luke said.

"Cute." Peter said sarcastically.

"Victims of the almighty Sarlacc, his excellency hopes you will die honorably. But should any of you wish to beg for mercy, the great Jabba the Hutt will now listen to your pleas!" C-3PO shouted from the large sailing barge.

"3PO! You Tell That Slimy Piece Of Worm Ridden Filth, He'll Get No Such Pleasure From Us!" Han shouted to the gold robot. "Right?" he asked the large furry creature behind him.

"Argh!" Chewie roared.

"Jabba! This is your last chance! Free us, or die!" Luke shouted.

Peter's ears heard nothing but laughter coming from the sailing barge.

"I guess that's a 'no' then." Peter mumbled.

Oola could only nod in response.

(Move him into position!) Jabba ordered in his native tongue.

The guard pushed Luke towards the end of the plank with his pike.

And was it Peter's imagination, or did Luke seem entirely too calm? And what was that little salute he just gave?

Luke jumped off the plank, spun around, grabbed the end of the plank with his hands, and spring boarded back into the air and back onto the skiff.

At the same time, something popped from the sailing barge and flew towards him. Peter saw Luke stretch out his hand, and grab a silver and black cylinder-like object before pressing a button on the side. A blade of green energy shot out from one end of it, and Peter realized it was a laser sword of some kind.

He watched as Luke slashed at one of the guards, the second he did that one of the guards, whom he assumed was 'Lando', took off his helmet and punched the third guard that was there.

Peter grunted and flexed his muscles, breaking his bonds with ease.

Luke just stared at Peter in surprise.

"I've got my own skills." Peter said.

"I see that." Luke said as several people, from the second skiff to the upper deck of the sailing barge, started to shoot at them.

Peter punched the fourth guard that was trying to grab Oola, knocking him off the skiff, and then freed Oola from her cuffs with ease. He gripped her shoulders gently, pushing the Twi'lek dancer towards the back of the skiff.

"I've got to go help them. Stay here. You'll be safe." Peter said to her.

"Be careful." Oola said, leaning in to gently kiss Peter on the cheek.

Peter smiled back at her, only to gasp when he saw an armored man with a jet pack fly from the sail barge and land on their skiff, pulling a strange blaster rifle at Luke. The young Jedi sliced the gun in half, before he started redirecting laser fire from the guards on the sailing barge. The bounty hunter fired some kind of cable from his wrist, wrapping Luke up in it, until another laser blast from the guards on the barge knocked both of them down. Luke was free of the cable in seconds, but the bounty hunter was on the ground and slightly dazed.

The second skiff, with more of Jabba's men, was slowly drifting towards them, the guards firing their guns at Luke.

Luke ran towards them and jumped from his skiff to the second skiff, and was batting laser fire away with his green bladed laser sword.

Peter pulled his mask over his head before he rushed towards the skiff's plank, using it as a spring board to jump across the Sarlacc Pit and land on the side of the sailing barge.

Oola just gasped in amazement as she saw her protector and friend perform such a leap. Even a Jedi couldn't have pulled that off.

Spider-Man crawled up the walls of the sailing barge with ease, until he was on the observation deck. The second he got up there, Jabba's henchmen opened fire on him again and again. Spider-Man dodged laser blast after laser blast easily, something that seemed far easier than dodging bullets back in New York City.

Looking back, he gasped when he saw the jet pack wearing bounty hunter attempt to shoot Luke in the back. He was relieved, however, when Han suddenly spun around and struck his jet pack with a large lance he was carrying. The jet pack ignited, throwing the bounty hunter across the Sarlacc Pit and into the thick walls of the sailing barge, before falling into the pit itself.

One of the guards that was on the second skiff, unconscious from the breakout, got back up while Han and Chewie were trying to save Lando from the Sarlacc Pit. He turned and saw Oola and rushed her, trying to capture her to use as a hostage. Oola, however, saw him, and retaliated, kicking him in the gut and smacking his nose with the palm of her hand. This stunned the guard and allowed Oola to throw a high kick (which was thanks to her athletic dancing skills) to the guard's head, knocking him off the skiff and towards the Sarlacc Pit.

Oola actually grinned, not having expected to use her dancing skills in actual combat.

It felt... liberating.

Back on the sail barge, Spider-Man rushed the guards, flipping through the air, kicking and punching everyone that was trying to kill him. Some of the guards even fell off the side of the barge and into the Sarlacc Pit.

Luke eventually emerged on the deck of the sailing barge, deflecting laser fire with his sword and back at the guards.

Spider-Man paused briefly when a brown-haired woman in a gold and reddish metal bikini and long skirt rushed out from the lower decks.

"Get the gun! Point it at the deck!" Luke shouted to the woman.

Spider-Man punched out one of the large, pig-faced guards before another guard pulled a blaster and fired at Luke, striking his hand.

"AH!" the young Jedi shouted, covering his hurt hand.

Luke quickly recovered and slashed at the guard who had shot him.

Another guard rushed towards Spider-Man, only to have the webslinger step out of the way allowing the guard to rush past him, and allowing Spider-Man to give him a push at his back that hurled him off the barge and into the Sarlacc Pit.

That thing's gotta be eating well today. Spider-Man thought to himself.

Three more guards rushed up onto the deck and charged the group. Luke and the woman saw them, only to see Spider-Man jump towards them, feet first, and kicking the trio off of the barge in one shot.

Luke and the woman looked at each other in shock.

Luke kicked the lever on the gun, triggering the large double-barrel gun to fire at the ship itself.

Seeing Luke and the woman swing away towards the skiff on a cable, Spider-Man jumped over the side of the sailing barge, and allowed himself to slide down a few feet before springing off the wall with all his might, propelling himself once again over the Sarlacc Pit and towards the waiting skiff where Oola and the others just watched as he flew through the air and landed hard on the floor.

"Okay? Let's get going! And don't forget the droids!" Luke said to Lando.

"We're on our way!" Lando said as he punched the controls of the skiff while Oola rushed over and hugged Spider-Man around the neck.

The skiff used its magnet hoist to pull two different-looking robots from the sand on the other side of the sail barge, (Peter actually recognizing the gold droid from Jabba's throne room and the sail barge) before the skiff accelerated and raced away from the barge, right before a huge fireball consumed the entire ship.

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Within less than an hour, Peter and Oola were flying high above the desert planet, guests of Luke Skywalker and his allies, aboard a ship called The Millennium Falcon.

("I'll meet you back at the Fleet.") Luke said from his own ship.

"Hurry. The Alliance should be assembled by now." Leia Organa said into the mic.

("I will.")

"Hey, Luke! Thanks. Thanks for coming after me. I owe you one." Han said into the communicator.

Without saying a word, Luke and his droid, R2-D2, flew off in a different direction than the Falcon.

"And now, we need to get changed out of these ridiculous outfits." Leia said to Oola, before turning to Spider-Man. "And then we need to see about you."

The pair of women went into the back of the ship.

"Personally, I wouldn't mind having them keep the outfits." Lando said with a smirk.

"Don't let Leia hear you say that." Han said as Chewie growled his agreement.

"Right." Lando huffed as he turned towards Spider-Man. "So what's your story?"

"Well... it all started when I was just a little baby..." Peter began, once he removed his mask.

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Leia took Oola and got changed out of their rather provocative slave outfits, the pair talking while they did.

"So... how did you and... what is your friends name anyway?" Leia asked.

"His name is Peter." Oola said as she got cleaned up.

The Falcon didn't have a shower, but Leia had managed to provide cleaning materials since their last trip to the Alliance medical ship.

"Peter." Leia said his name, trying to get a feel for it. "How did you and Peter meet?"

"I was a slave to Jabba the Hutt. Jabba wanted me to pleasure him, but I refused. He dropped me into the Rancor Pit, to have his pet beast devour me. It was there that I met Peter and his other ally. A man he called... Dr. Doom. Doom was caught by the Rancor, and..."

"Wait. They were in the pit before you? And the Rancor didn't get them?" Leia asked once she was dressed in a pair of pants, a shirt and a vest.

"I didn't understand how they got into the pit without anyone knowing. But Peter was unconscious. I woke him up as the Rancor was trying to devour Dr Doom. It tossed him away when his armor shocked the beast. Peter then defeated the Rancor in order to protect me." Oola explained.

At hearing that, Leia gasped in shock.

"He... defeated... the Rancor?" she gasped in disbelief.

"Yes." Oola said.

"How?" she asked.

"He punched it in the face." she stated.

Leia was now thoroughly shocked and confused.

"He punched... a Rancor... in the face?" Leia asked in continued bewilderment.

"Yes. Knocked it unconscious." Oola said as she comfortably dressed herself in a white dress, now more comfortable that her body was more covered than it had been.

Somehow, Leia knew she wasn't joking, but... it was so hard to believe.

"That's... impossible!" Leia gasped, her boots now half-way on her feet.

"I assure you, he did." Oola said. "I saw it."

Leia Organa was naturally skeptical of having heard of Spider-Man's exploits, so she decided to test this theory. Going to the forward cargo hold, she found a spare chromium steel bar that Chewie had pulled out of the main maintenance hatch because it was unnecessary. It was heavy, but she could manage it.

"What are you doing, Miss Leia?" Oola asked.

"I'm going to test Peter." Leia said as she headed to the cockpit.

Oola followed Leia to the front of the ship, where Peter was eating something that looked like a candy bar.

"Peter?" Leia said to the young man.

"Yes?" the webslinger asked the princess.

"I want you to bend this bar of reforged chromium." she said simply.

The group looked at Leia in shock, then looked to Peter.

"Uh... why?" Peter asked.

"Oola told me how you defeated a Rancor. I want to see if that's true." she said, handing him the bar of chromium steel.

"Seriously, Leia?" Han asked. "Even Chewie can't bend that bar."

"I know." she said.

Peter looked at the bar in his hand. It was about three feet in length, and about as thick as a quarter.

Taking a deep breath, Peter gripped the sides of the bar, and slowly began bending the ends towards each other.

The group, which included Oola, Leia, Han, Chewbacca, Lando and C-3PO just watched as Peter slowly bent the chromium bar from a long straight piece into what looked like an almost perfect box spring.

It was coiled around and around at least four times from end to end. Oola just looked at Leia, giving her a slightly smug smile as Peter handed the steel 'spring' back to the princess.

The whole group looked stunned at the physical feat Peter had just accomplished.

"Sorry it took so long. I haven't eaten much in the last 24-hours." Peter said with a shrug.

At hearing that Peter was not actually at his full strength, the whole group had a very similar thought: they wanted him on their side!

"I... think we can find a place for you in the Alliance." Leia said.

"You're offering me a job?" Peter asked.

"They'd be stupid not to offer you a job." Lando said.

"Well, if that offer extends to Miss Oola, then I accept." Peter said with a smile.

Oola smiled at Peter, happy he was thinking of her well-being.

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Authors Notes:

This was just a small simple idea that I developed upon the suggestion from another author. He wanted to see what I could do with this pairing.

So, here it is and I hope he's happy.

This will probably be a two-chapter story. The next chapter will take place mostly on Endor. I haven't decided if I'll have anything too different, but expect some surprises and all.

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EXTRA SCENE

Peter was in his quarters upon Home One, going over the history of the Galactic Republic, when a communication suddenly came into his quarters, on the screen of his computer in front of him.

"Peter? Is that you?" Sue Richards asked.

"Wha... Sue? Reed?" Peter gasped when he saw their faces.

"Thank goodness!" Sue cried.

"We've been trying to contact you through a subspace transdimensional hole in the barriers of our universe and the one you ended up in." Reed said.

"And if I knew what that meant, I'd be honored you figured it out." Peter said back to them.

"Doom's designs was completely different than what I was used to, but..." Reed started to say.

"We're going to try and find a way to bring you back." Sue said.

"Uh... thanks, but... I can't leave." Peter replied.

"What?" Sue gasped.

"It's complicated. Listen, right now I'm with a group of people who are trying to overthrow a tyrannical regime run by a guy who calls himself The Emperor." Peter explained. "And, actually, there's another issue."

"What issue?" Sue asked.

"Peter! The shower's free." Oola said to him.

Sue and the others just looked at the webslinger.

"You've got a girlfriend?" Johnny asked, suddenly showing his face on the screen, nearly pushing his sister's head to the side.

"Uh... kind of. It's a work in progress." Peter said sheepishly.

"Is she hot?" Johnny asked, his sister and his faces now filling the screen.

Suddenly, Oola appeared behind Peter, her shapely nude body wrapped in a white towel. Johnny's jaw dropped.

"Who are you talking to, Peter?" Oola asked as she leaned against Peter, her chest pushing up against his back

"Jeez, Pete! A green woman? Who do you think you are? Jim Kirk?" Johnny gasped.

"Johnny!" Sue admonished her brother.