Hello to any random readers! This is my fourth Fanfiction, and I hope you may enjoy reading it.
Before you guys read this chapter, I just want to give some information about the story. There will be twelve chapters after this one, and all of them have already been wrote and edited. I kind of wrote this whole story last Christmas, and never posted it.
Since it's already been wrote, I can update at any time that is convenient for me. Depending on if anyone likes this, I may try to post one chapter a day.
This story will be NaruSasu, which means Sasuke is the Uke. And before anyone tells me, yes I know how it technically makes more sense for Sasuke to be the Seme. But in my head, Sasuke will always be the shorter Uke. A girl can dream, right?
I've never read a Christmas story before, so I'm not really sure if this will be up to standard.
Either way, if you notice any spelling/grammatical errors (or just any errors at all), please don't hesitate to call me out on them! Tell me what you think honestly, critique is good to improve writing!
I hope this isn't so awful that your eyes bleed and you go into a coma from banging your head on a desk.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Twelve Days of Terror
"We're going and that's that, Naruto!" The outburst was loud and somewhat expected. Sasuke Uchiha had finally lost his patience with his whining boyfriend.
Usually his tolerance for Naruto's whinging was much higher, but after hearing the same complaints for the last few days, not to mention the constant arguments, he was well and truly fed up.
For clarification, Naruto wasn't always like this. Most of the time, he was a cheerful, optimistic person who had a tendency to be happy no matter what the situation. However, after The Incident, he had become sullen and unhappy.
The Incident being what had occurred five days ago.
It had started off simply enough; Sasuke had been standing at the stove, stirring a pot of hot soup. Naruto had been lounging on one of their chairs, relaxing after a long day of work. All had been well and peaceful, until Sasuke had commented rather idly: "What did you plan to do for Christmas this year?"
A little taken-aback at the question, because usually Sasuke never asked, Naruto had replied. "The same thing we do every year, darling."
Sasuke didn't bristle at the term of endearment, and this was what made Naruto sit up straight and focus his full attention on the raven. Sasuke always protested against Naruto's pet names. "That is, of course, unless you want to do something different."
Naruto had fully expected for Sasuke to change the subject, because it was such a trivial and boring and plain unnecessary topic of conversation. Every year since the young couple had started dating, they had spent Christmas with Naruto's family. It had evolved into a tradition for them.
"As a matter of fact..." Sasuke began. "I do." Sasuke had then paused in his cooking, awaiting Naruto's reply. The other man was clearly surprised, and although Sasuke was facing in the opposite direction, he could picture the look of bafflement on Naruto's face clearly. "Naruto?" He prompted when there was no reply.
Naruto gawked at Sasuke with astonishment. Something different? Now, don't get him wrong, he wasn't a rigid or inflexible person (that was more Sasuke's forte) but the prospect of doing something other than spending a comfortable, enjoyable time with his family for the holiday season was completely shocking for him. "What were you thinking?" He finally managed to say after several long minutes of surprised silence. "Did you want to celebrate with just the two of this year?" That wasn't so bad, was it? Sure, it would be a little boring, and Sasuke was kind of a Grinch, but if the raven wanted to do it so bad, could he really deny him? "We can arrange that, if you want..." Naruto had hoped (in vain) that Sasuke would drop the subject.
Sasuke had tried to think of a tactful and careful way of phrasing his next sentence, he wanted to ease into the subject, but instead, he had blurted it out. "I want us to visit my family this year."
Silence. Complete and utter silence, only broken by the bubbling of the delicious scented vegetable soup Sasuke was still stirring half-heartedly.
"Your family?" Naruto repeated, needing to hear clarification. "You want us to...with your family?"
"Yes." Sasuke confirmed, a little tersely. Why was Naruto acting like this was such a flabbergasting thing? Surely he had been expecting this to come eventually... "I haven't spent Christmas with them ever since we got together. That's four years."
Four wonderful, blissfully Itachi free years. Naruto had thought. Sasuke's family had never been the most welcoming to him, and although he tried to put on a brave face for Sasuke's sake, their judgement and harsh attitude towards him made him feel hurt and angry. Not to mention, Itachi had never approved of him. He was sure the elder man still didn't. "I never thought you'd be interested in that." Naruto said. "You haven't objected so far."
"I'm not objecting." Sasuke decided to turn around to face Naruto, sensing this conversation may be heading into dangerous waters. His dark eyes regarded Naruto severely. "I was suggesting we switch things up a little this year."
"I like how we always celebrate Christmas." Naruto abandoned all pretences of being agreeable. He looked at Sasuke with puffed cheeks. "It's one of my favourite times of the year."
"I know." Sasuke said. "And I've done what you've wished for four years."
"Are you saying you haven't had fun?" Naruto furrowed his blonde eyebrows. "That you've been reluctant?"
"Of course not," Sasuke had scoffed. "Your family are all..." Overwhelming, and somewhat annoying. "Very kind and friendly." He had finally settled on. "But, you have to see this from my point of view," He sighed. "I miss my family. I miss my mother's cooking-"
"My mother is a fantastic cook!"
"-I didn't imply otherwise, did I?" Sasuke glowered. "-I miss eating ham instead of pork ramen, and I miss father's small, forced smiles when he receives a gift."
"Oh yes, I can see why." Naruto had commented sarcastically.
"I miss the noiseless halls, and I miss the quietness, but most of all..." Sasuke looked to the ground wistfully. "I miss my big brother."
The words hit Naruto hard, and although he should have felt sympathy, he felt angry. "So, you want to substitute my family orientated Christmas for a few fake smiles and a glazed ham?"
"I'm not attacking you." Sasuke snapped. "I just miss being with my family. Is that such an awful thing?"
"Yes." Naruto declared stubbornly. "It is."
"How?" Sasuke countered with a sneer. "How is missing my family so unfathomable?"
"Because you have me!" Naruto glowered, blue eyes darkening stormily. "Am I inadequate?"
"No!" Sasuke near shouted. "No! I'm not trying to insult you, or your family, I'm just trying to express my desire to be with my family for one damn year, Naruto! One year, that's all I'm asking!"
"No." Naruto said, with ringing finality. "No. It's not happening."
"Oh isn't it?" Sasuke pushed off the bench, allowing the soup to simmer. "And what makes you think you can make all of the decisions?"
"Because I'm the man, and the man says no."
"You arrogant, self-entitled-"
"I said no, are you hard of hearing? Stop those ridiculous protests and hurry up with dinner. I'm hungry, and I'm cranky." Naruto snarled, being uncharacteristically demeaning and rude. "You can be such a baby, Sasuke. When are you going to learn to stop relying so heavily on Itachi and grow up a little!?"
"Oh that's rich, coming from the man who still visits his mother every afternoon!" Sasuke retorted, infuriated and humiliated beyond belief. Itachi was a definite no-no subject for him. "You're the man who is incapable of preparing a meal that isn't cupped ramen, not to mention the man who can't clean."
"You're the man who got tucked in by his elder brother up to the age of when we started dating." Naruto had said nastily. "And that was when we were eighteen!"
Sasuke blushed at the reminder. He had told Naruto never to bring that up! It wasn't his fault Itachi couldn't help but coddle him! "I don't even know why we are even arguing about this. You said we could arrange something-"
"I didn't think that entailed going to your parents place!" Naruto said.
"I don't know why you're being so difficult..." Sasuke crossed his arms defensively. "I just want to spend Christmas with my family for one year. How would you feel if you had to spend Christmas with my family every year?"
"Suicidal." Naruto answered honestly.
Sasuke thinned his pink lips.
"I'm just being honest," Naruto shrugged, trying to cool down. If he kept insulting Sasuke and his family, he had a feeling that the boiling hot pot of soup would be upturned on his head. "Your family aren't exactly the merriest of people. What made you decide you wanted to see them, anyway? You haven't protested for years."
Sasuke shifted on his feet, somewhat guiltily. "Is it so hard to believe I miss them?"
"I know you, Sasuke Uchiha." Naruto regarded him with narrowed eyes. "You may be silent throughout the holiday period, but you still suffer. You dislike Christmas with a passion, and you're always immensely relieved when it's over. You've always been like this, ever since we were kids, so forgive me for being a little sceptical."
"Itachi called me, okay?" Sasuke admitted, avoiding eye contact. "He sounded so disappointed when I told him we were spending Christmas with your family again."
Naruto found this odd. Usually, Sasuke and he received a memo, or an invitation in the mail. (Just another reason Naruto found the Uchiha's so weird, they were so formal. Was it really that hard to pick up the phone?) "We already responded to the joint invitation, though." Naruto remembered. "It was sent in October." Much too early, in his opinion.
"Yes, we did." Sasuke nodded.
"What makes this year so important?" Naruto asked suspiciously. "Why now?"
"Because Itachi isn't actually working this year," Sasuke said, mumbling under his breath afterwards. "For once..."
"What about your mom and dad?"
"The same..." Sasuke said. He widened his pretty eyes, and Naruto looked up at a crack in the ceiling. Those eyes were capable of conning him into doing anything that the sly raven wanted. "This is really rare for us, love..."
"...Love? You're really pulling out all of the tricks, hey, Sasuke?" Naruto said dryly. Sasuke only ever called him that when he wanted something. Stroking Naruto's ego was a sure way to convince him. "I'm still against this..."
Sasuke perked up, and stepped closer to Naruto in anticipation. "So you agree? I don't really need your permission, but I would still rather you be agreeable..."
"I'll think about it." Naruto conceded, defeated. "Can we just drop the subject for now?"
Sasuke rolled his eyes at the plea. "Fine..."
Five days, thirty arguments, and one consultation later, they were still stubbornly refusing to give up. Although Sasuke had tasted victory, Naruto had decided to seek advice from his best friend Kiba, who had listened to Naruto's story and then declared Naruto should not concede defeat. Since Naruto always listened to Kiba, and Kiba was thick, Sasuke and he had been bickering even more than usual, and Sasuke was becoming quickly fed up. All he wanted was to spend one Christmas with his family. It was unfair Naruto was refusing him this...
Naruto's counter argument was that Sasuke only wanted to spend Christmas with his family because Itachi had convinced him to do so. He didn't want to spend an awkward, cold Christmas with a family that didn't really like him at all. Excluding Sasuke's mother, she had been friends with Kushina for years, but even still, Naruto had a feeling that the gracefully aged woman still didn't think he was good enough for her precious youngest son.
And it stung. It stung him to know that he would never be accepted by the Uchiha's fully. They were polite, but their disdain for him was displayed openly. It made him feel that Sasuke was out of his league, that Sasuke could do better than a deadbeat construction worker like him.
Sasuke would have disembowelled him if he knew what he thought of himself, so Naruto kept these insecurities to himself. A lot of the time, he could push these feelings down, because despite his middleclass job, he was the best Sasuke would ever have. But they surfaced, and they always did so when he was around the Uchiha's.
That, and Itachi intimidated him.
"We're going and that's that, Naruto!" Sasuke slammed his hands down on the counter top and then put them upon his skinny hips. "It's my turn to be selfish this year!" He spat, resembling Itachi in his supreme rage. "I have to put up with your family all of the time! The least you can do is deal with mine for twelve days!"
"Twelve?" Naruto gaped, mouth dropping open in a mixture of outrage and horror. "Twelve days?"
"Eleven days before Christmas." Sasuke said. "And then on Christmas. We don't have to stay for New Years, because we always go out with our friends."
"I don't wanna!" Naruto pouted. "Sasuke, we have to stay here!"
"Why? Tell me the exact reason why we can't go!" The command was unyielding.
"Because we always spend Christmas with my family, we can't just break that tradition!" Naruto said, and his voice came out higher than he had intended. "Think about how dull Christmas will be without my family!"
"You mean peaceable." Sasuke's voice was also tinny.
"I can't take this anymore." Naruto growled. "I'm going for a walk." He stood up, and brushed down his garish orange jacket. He stomped towards the door, and Sasuke gave a small, pained noise.
"Naruto..." His voice was soft and beseeching. A tone Naruto seldom heard. "Please?"
Naruto paused, hand grazing the doorknob. He could tell Sasuke didn't want him to leave. He sighed heavily. "I'll be back. Don't worry." Without further ado, he opened the door and stepped out into the cool, brisk afternoon air.
As he did whenever he was feeling distressed, he somehow found himself at his childhood home. He hadn't bothered to knock on the door or ring the doorbell unnecessarily before entering.
His childhood home was the epitome of warm and welcoming, it was cleanly, but not to the point of being sterile, and it was very personal. As soon as you stepped inside, you could tell that the family that lived inside all cared about one another very much. The walls were a little scuffed, and the paint was a little patchy in some places, the floor may have been a tiny bit dirty, and some of the furniture may have been mismatched, but it was home, and the abundance of photographs lining the walls and surfaces told a tale.
Once upon a time, a baby named Naruto was born into a...interesting sort of family. His mother was the fiery red haired Kushina, who had fallen for the handsome blonde former leader of their quaint little Konoha. Naruto's childhood was simplistic and sweet, his mother (although very short tempered) was loving and kind, and his father had gone into an early retirement when Naruto had been a toddler, content to whittle his life away with his beloved wife and son. It was possible for him to do this, as he had been paid out with an almost obscene amount of money.
However, unlike the Uchiha's, who loved to flaunt their wealth, the Uzumaki's were humble and often donated large sums of money to charities.
Naruto's life had been uncomplicated for the most part, and those few complications that did arise were on the behalf of Sasuke, who seemed to be broody for no reason a good half of the time. One of Sasuke's flaws was that he was rarely appreciative, and although Naruto loved him to bits, it was an apparent trait.
One that a certain busty leader who looked unfairly young for her age did point out often when Naruto was speaking to her privately.
Did he forget to mention? Tsunade and Jiraiya had been living in the Uzumaki household ever since he had entered his teens. Naruto was constantly questioning the relationship between the two people, but had never come to the conclusion of whether they were romantically involved or not. They didn't share the same room, but Jiraiya did have the tendency to sneak into the bathroom when Tsunade was showering...
Maybe she just hadn't caught him yet. He was a sly old dog.
Jiraiya was Naruto's godfather, and he was constantly giving Naruto advice on how to deal with the temperamental Uchiha, opposed to Tsunade, who couldn't make up her mind and decide if she liked Sasuke or not. Naruto could understand her confliction; he sometimes wondered why he had started dating the other man.
There was no ending to his story yet, and he was glad that there wouldn't be one (hopefully) for a long time. He had never liked conclusions.
"Fishcake," Kushina said in surprise, almost dropping the laundry basket she was holding in her arms at his appearance. "What are you doing?"
Naruto twitched at the childhood nickname. He had been dealing with that ever since he was born. It was a constant source of sheepishness for him, and he became especially annoyed when Sasuke taunted him for it. He would never forget when Sasuke had first heard him called that as a child...
"Oh hey Fishcake, what took you so long to get to class? Were you busy being fried up?"
"Stop following me around, you damn Fishcake!"
"If you don't stop pestering me, I'll dump you in the river so you can join the other fish in the sea, Fishcake!"
Yeah. He was glad Sasuke was past that stage.
"I came for a visit." Naruto smiled, but it was strained.
Kushina immediately frowned, looking formidable. "What happened?"
Kushina placed the basket on the ground and put her hands on her curvaceous hips.
"Sasuke and I had a disagreement," Naruto amended. He could never hide anything from his mother. She had the best motherly instincts in the world. "I needed to get away from him for a while."
Kushina nodded understandably. "Get in the kitchen and tell me about it." It was a command, not a suggestion. "Your father is already inside drinking some tea."
Naruto nodded and made his way to the cosy kitchen. All dining experiences with the Uzumaki's were close and personal, much to Sasuke's dismay. Sasuke had never quite gotten used to speaking at the same time as eating. In his home, speaking too much and too loudly at dinner was a sort of taboo, a nasty surprise for Naruto when he had first shared dinner with the Uchiha's.
Minato indeed was sipping at a cup of green tea when his son plopped down in a chair adjacent. He looked up and gave a bright smile, the crows feet around his eyes crinkling. "Hello son."
"Hi Dad," Naruto returned the greeting sombrely. "How's it going?"
"Good." Minato answered, placing down the newspaper he had been perusing. "I was just reading about Tsunade gracing the shopping centre with her presence and opening the new level." He pointed a finger to the front page, where Tsunade was looking bored, eyes staring wistfully in the direction of a brand new liquor store. "I have a feeling she only attended to be gifted some free alcohol."
"That sounds like Granny, alright." Naruto chortled. "Where's the old perve?"
"Working on one of his novels." Minato said. "Do not disturb him...he's only just getting over his writers block."
"I understand." Naruto said. He stood up and shuffled over to the tea pot, pouring himself a cup of tea. He sat back down, and inhaled the hot air deeply. Green tea always calmed him. He sipped on it, making small talk with his father until Kushina finally entered the room.
She sat down besides her husband, linking hands with him. Despite their time together, they had never ever fallen out of love, even briefly. "So, tell us about the newest development in your life." Kushina said, with a cheeky smile. "What have you done this time, Fishcake?"
Naruto sobered up immediately, a pucker forming between his brows as he frowned in consternation. "Sasuke wants to spend Christmas with his family this year."
There was a long pause, in which Minato watched his son with an unreadable face. Kushina looked thoughtful, and Naruto was expecting a rant of how that couldn't happen, and Sasuke was being silly.
Obviously, he was quite surprised when she nodded firmly and made an approving sound in the back of her throat. "It's about time."
There was another pause, and Naruto's mouth fell open. "What?" He said, fumbling. "You aren't...mad or upset?"
"Of course not," Kushina gave a very un-ladylike snort at the question. "It's about time that boy prioritized his family a little."
"But, but-" Naruto stuttered. "You-"
"Of course I'm disappointed you can't spend Christmas with us," Kushina said, sensing where her son was going with his near unintelligible speech. "But it's been four years since Sasuke has spent the holidays with his family. I felt sorry for Mikoto every year." She gave her son a knowing stern look. "Did you give that boy a hard time?"
Sasuke was past the age of being a boy, but Naruto didn't point that out. Kushina had always referred to Sasuke as a boy.
"Um..." He scratched the back of his head sheepishly.
"Naruto Uzumaki," She scolded her son with a light frown. "How dare you do something so unfair to that poor boy!"
"I don't want to go," Naruto tried to defend, aware of how unjust and juvenile he sounded. "I want to be with my family."
"Of course you do, it's only natural, but have you ever considered Sasuke might want the same thing?" She squeezed Minato's hand hard in her displeasure, and Minato winced, but didn't pull away. "Imagine how you would feel being separated from your family for so long, and not even being able to visit them during holidays to boot!"
Naruto cowed, feeling quite ashamed and disgusting. His mother seldom chastised him this severely. "I just-"
"Don't you try and justify your actions, young man." Kushina continued, somewhat swept up in her anger, something her son also did. "You ought to be-" She took a deep breath, and her ruddy cheeks lightened somewhat as she calmed down. "-Be a little more thoughtful."
Naruto knew that wasn't what she had intended on saying, but didn't point this out either. "I know," Naruto said, looking down at the dregs of his tea sulkily. "I didn't think about him at all."
"As long as you admit it..." Kushina finally released her husband's cramping hand. "I'm not personally angry at you," She told him, not unkindly. "I'm angry on Sasuke's behalf. He's always had trouble speaking about his family; it must have been quite hard for him to breach the subject with you."
Naruto felt even worse.
"I'm not trying to guilt you, just stating facts." Kushina took her sons tanned hand in replacement. Her grip was gentle, like her eyes. "You won't deny him this, will you?"
"No." Naruto said. "I won't."
"Good." She released his hands and leant back, looking a little tired. "We'll have to rearrange our plans. Perhaps celebrate Christmas early, because there is no way I'm going to let the two of you go ahead without spending a day with us. We'll talk later. For now, go tell Sasuke of your decision." She said.
Naruto got to his feet, and kissed his mother on the cheek. "Thanks mom. You always know what to say."
"I'm your mother." Kushina said. "Of course I know what to say. I know when to console, and I know when to kick ass."
"That you do, firecracker." Minato had been silent throughout the 'discussion' and finally spoke up. "Give me a kiss, mama bear."
Naruto shuddered when Kushina pecked her husband on the nose in a cutesy manner. He would never grow used to seeing that side of his parents. "I'll catch you guys later."
Kushina and Minato didn't reply, now beginning to jostle one another and play fight. Watching it made him feel wistful, every 'play fight' with Sasuke turned into something serious.
I had best get back and apologise for being such an ass. I'll need to go all night tonight to appease him.
Not that that was a problem.
Naruto gnawed on Sasuke's neck and the other man gave an unmanly giggle.
Ever since Naruto had agreed to visit Sasuke's family Sasuke had been in an uncharacteristically good mood, not even protesting when Naruto felt him up when he was doing household chores or peeling vegetables.
Naruto fully took advantage of this, and even though he had been screwing Sasuke senseless, he had also been cuddling and kissing Sasuke in affectionate displays the other man usually would have scorned in his normal state.
It was amazing, and Naruto wished Sasuke could be like this more often. He loved being able to spoil Sasuke. He also loved how he could call Sasuke any pet name he wanted and the other man would just ignore it completely instead of glaring. It was fun, especially when he could address the other man as 'Babe.'
That was Naruto's favourite nickname for Sasuke.
"Naruto, stop..." Sasuke protested lightly when Naruto's nibbling mouth travelled lower. "We have to start packing!"
Naruto stopped immediately, good mood diminishing. In the glow of this magical atmosphere that had been permeating the house for the last two weeks. They were leaving in two days, on the thirteenth, so they really would be staying with Sasuke's family for twelve days.
Sasuke always insisted on packing earlier, as he was an organized control freak. "Come on..." Naruto groaned. "You can't leave me all aroused like this. I'll have to start bucking into my palm midway through packing my socks."
Sasuke giggled again. Another thing he wouldn't usually do. "You can be so crude..."
"You love it," Naruto quipped, kissing Sasuke's pulse. The other man shivered at the sensation. "Let's finish..."
"Just do it fast."
"We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas," Sasuke's eyebrow twitched at the out-of-tune, pitchy singing. "We wish you a Merry Christmas and a happy new year!"
Naruto applauded loudly, hooting and pumping his fist in the air over-enthusiastically. "Great work, guys! Even better than last year!"
"You really think so, Naruto?" Konohamaru beamed upwards. "Moegi was convinced we needed to practice more, but I thought we had improved!"
"Definitely, you have." Naruto praised warmly, reaching down and petting the boy on his spiky haired head. "Keep it up, and you guys will be the best singers in all of Konoha!"
Sasuke sincerely doubted this, but did not say a word, merely partially concealing himself behind Naruto's bigger form so he didn't have to give false compliments. He had never really excelled at that.
He wondered if Naruto was talented at that, or he genuinely thought that screeching qualified as good singing...
Either way, Naruto might need his hearing checked.
"Thank you," Moegi said, a little modestly. "Carolling is one of my favourite parts of Christmas. It just makes me so...happy."
Sasuke resisted the urge to gag and make a vomiting sound satirically.
"It makes others happy as well," Naruto said, although Sasuke doubted this. The old cranky man who lived down the street from them definitely wouldn't be happy with a bunch of kids shrieking on his doorstep. "You guys have great Christmas spirit!"
"Thanks..." Udon said, his usual sliver of snot frozen in the cold, wintery air. "We should go now..."
"Don't be silly, come inside," Naruto opened the door invitingly. "Sasuke made some Christmas cookies and I'm sure some hot milk will warm you all up."
The kids scurried inside eagerly, and Sasuke socked Naruto on the arm, hard. "What are you doing?" Sasuke hissed. "I made them for tomorrow."
"Mom doesn't need your contribution." Naruto spoke at a normal volume, dismissing him. "She cooks enough to feed a small army. Besides, your cookies are always overshadowed." Obliviously, Naruto hopped his way to the kitchen, unaware that he had just insulted Sasuke's cooking abilities. That, were, admittedly, very good.
But nothing could beat Kushina's cooking. It was the best.
Sasuke growled under his breath and stormed into the kitchen, watching the-
Like a hawk.
Naruto took the cooling rack of the kitchen counter and offered the snowman shaped treats to the hungry children. All three grabbed them greedily, even Moegi, who was usually the politest of the three. "These are great," Konohamaru said, chewing loudly. "I remember them every year."
"Mr. Uchiha makes the best cookies." Moegi chimed respectfully, standing and giving a small bow to Sasuke. "Thank you, sir."
Sasuke gave a small smile. Maybe they weren't so bad, after all. They were certainly more polite then Naruto.
"Mr. Uchiha?" Naruto squawked. "You three don't call me Mr. Uzumaki!"
"That's because you're just plain, old Naruto." Konohamaru swallowed thickly, guzzling down a glass of warm milk that Sasuke had just placed in front of him. "Mr. Uchiha is so much more..."
"Sophisticated," Moegi chimed.
"Stony," Konohamaru contributed.
"And formal." Udon said lazily.
Sasuke didn't know whether to be insulted or not. He settled for a medium of being slightly appeased, and slightly annoyed.
Naruto stuck his tongue out childishly, only reinforcing the children's opinions of him. "See if I invite you inside next time."
"You will," Konohamaru said. "You always do."
"Point made." Naruto said, shrugging his broad shoulders. "What do you kids plan to do this year for Christmas?"
"Snowball fights!" Konohamaru smiled impishly. "I challenge you to one right now, Naruto!"
Moegi, who had opened her mouth to give her answer, closed it with narrowed eyes. "Kono-"
"You're on!" Naruto crowed, with a challenging smirk. "You, Moegi, and Udon verses me!"
"That's three against one!" Moegi said. "That's not very fair."
"I know," Naruto continued to smirk. "It's hardly fair at all. You really need a battalion to defeat me."
With that, the four children (well, Naruto truly was one at heart) swept from the kitchen. The three children pulled back on their hanging wool hats, and before Naruto could run out the door, Sasuke grabbed his arm and pulled him back inside. "What?" Naruto whined. "Do we have to pack right now?"
Sasuke usually would have forbade his boyfriend from even taking a foot outside when they were supposed to be packing, but as he was still in his softened state, he merely walked over to a cupboard and pulled out a winter coat, gloves, and a bright orange scarf that Naruto had purchased for half price. "Don't catch a cold." Sasuke snagged a fluffy hat from their hat rack and tugged it down over Naruto's golden hair. "And don't hit any of our neighbours, or their pets. Your snowballs are hard."
"That's what she said." Naruto sniggered.
Sasuke bonked his idiotic boyfriend on the head. "Don't be so uncouth." Konohamaru had overheard the comment, and had pulled out a notepad, jotting down what Naruto had said. "You're a bad influence."
"You sound just like your brother when you say that," Naruto breathed huskily. "Remember the way he would say that to you about me? Remember that time in your room when he went on a rant, and you had to squirm and hide your erection whilst I hid under your bed..."
"You remember the sweetest things." Sasuke rolled his dark eyes. "Go now. And if my car is inundated with snow, your snowballs are going to freeze when I lock you outside for the night." That said, Sasuke pushed Naruto outside in the direction of the children, and shut the door.
He could hear laughter and shouting as he did his pre-cleaning. Opposed to normal people, who may only do a large-scale cleanup before they went away, Sasuke did a pre-cleaning before his large-scale cleanup. He was just that neurotic.
When Naruto stumbled inside, it was dark and he was shivering, covered head to foot in melting snow.
"What are you doing?" Sasuke grouched, looking up from his cup of tea. He had only just finished cleaning, and was not pleased that Naruto was dripping all over his freshly mopped floors. "You're soaking wet. Stand outside until you dry."
"Bossy," Naruto commented. His golden strands were stuck to his tanned face, and his hands were peeking from his gloves, pallid and tinging slightly blue. "I'm fucking freezing. I need a hot shower."
Sasuke sighed, and stood up. He fetched a towel from the bathroom, and began drying Naruto's face roughly. "You couldn't have avoided the snow altogether? I know you could've beaten those kids without being in the line of fire."
"What would be the fun in that?" Naruto's voice was muffled as Sasuke wiped his lips. "Hey, be gentle!"
"They're turning blue." Sasuke pursed his lips, upset. "Can you not take care of yourself?"
"I know a way to warm them up..." Naruto leant forward and captured Sasuke's lips, and although it felt hot and sexy to Naruto, Sasuke felt like he was making out with an ice-cube.
He pulled away, rubbing his lips together to abate the numb feeling. "Shower.Now."
"I love it when you get all commanding on me," Naruto flirted. "It makes me want to bend you over and make you submit." He growled the last word, and although as an inexperienced teenager Sasuke's member would have stuck up fast, now he only rolled his eyes and faced in the opposite direction.
"Stop leaking all over the floor and get in the shower. We have to pack soon."
"Can't we just-"
"We're not doing it tomorrow." Sasuke interrupted, knowing what Naruto would say before he knew it himself. "We're doing that early Christmas thing with your family tomorrow, and we both know how long that will be."
"Yeah, fine." Naruto said. Uzumaki Christmases were lengthy, but not lackadaisical. Well, to Naruto, at least. "But you'd better believe I'm going to fuck you in some creative positions tonight, babe."
Sasuke's member didn't even stir, and Naruto pouted. "You used to get excited so easily..."
"Says the one minute wonder..."
"Shut up!" Naruto grimaced at the memory of his first sexual encounter with Sasuke. He would have loved to say it was mind blowing, and legendary. But in reality, it had been awkward and clumsy, just like any other teenagers first time.
However, what made it so embarrassing was that it hadn't been Naruto's first time. His first time had been with a random girl at one of Sai's social experiments, and there had been a few flings in between. Sasuke had been his first male sex partner, and although he had demonstrated considerable sexual mastery with the other woman, for some reason with Sasuke, he had blown his load not even sixty seconds into their first sex session, leaving Sasuke hot and bothered, and unsatisfied.
The next time had been marginally better, but Sasuke would never let Naruto live down that shameful sixty seconds.
"I can't believe I stayed in a committing relationship of my own free will with a moron like you. I ought to change your ringtone to Jizz In My Pants."
"Shut up!" Naruto parroted himself. "I'm going to shower!" He then stormed off, trying to force the memory out of his mind. Damn Sasuke. Trust him to remember the most cringe-worthy things.
Sasuke snorted when Naruto huffily walked away, much too pleased with himself. If Naruto was constantly going to demean him, the least he could do was hold some mortifying memories over his head.
Four hours later, and two unpacking and re-packing escapades – courtesy of Sasuke – since Naruto seemed incapable of packing for himself – The blonde had forgotten to pack underwear, and although Sasuke could turn a blind eye to Naruto going commando at home, and around their town, he was not going to allow such a thing in his distinguished family home. God forbid Naruto's jeans accidently slip down; they were always riding so low...
"No, Naruto." Sasuke said sharply, seeing out of the corner of his eyes Naruto trying to sneak in a pair of handcuffs and a maid outfit into his open suitcase. "I've never even agreed to wear that maid outfit, what makes you think I'd decide to wear that thing at my parent's house, of all places?"
Naruto shrugged. Not deeming him with a response.
"Can you not think of how irresponsible that would be? I'd have to wash out the semen, in my parent's washing machine. And Itachi..." Sasuke shuddered. "If he found out, he'd put me in a chastity belt so I wouldn't even be able to jerk off when you departed this world."
The insinuation that Itachi would kill him if he found out about their sex life made Naruto feel a little worried. Although he was a good fighter, he knew how talented the infamous Itachi was. "No maid outfit then..." Naruto tossed it on the ground uncaringly.
"And no handcuffs either." Sasuke braced himself on their bed as he struggled to shut his suitcase. When Naruto saw that the huge thing was bulging, his eyes rolled up to the ceiling.
"Do you really need to pack so much stuff?"
"Better to be over-prepared then under-prepared." Sasuke said. "You know my family is somewhat formal."
"That's an under exaggeration." Naruto said, sour and surly. He hated dressing in slacks and stiff shirts. "Do I really have to dress so pretentiously?"
"If I have to do it, so do you." Sasuke said, just as sullen. Although he dressed neater then Naruto, he didn't particularly enjoy wearing formal clothing for no real reason. It was just so...restricting.
"You could always not do it." Naruto pointed out. But he knew it was a lost cause. Sasuke had always conformed in his family, in an almost desperate attempt for approval. Naruto knew it was unhealthy, but Sasuke always ignored this, preferring to adapt a different demeanour. An innocent and childish demeanour that, was although cute, tiresome. Sasuke needed to make his parents accept he had grown up.
Maybe he could work on that during his trip.
Or, he could suffer through Itachi's hugs silently.
Just something Sasuke could look forward to.
Maybe he does miss that. I know that when Sasuke's family lived in Konoha, he bitched and whined about them all of the time to me, but absence does make the heart grow fonder.
"Don't be silly." Sasuke said, avoiding Naruto's eyes. "I couldn't do that."
"Your family is the only family I know that has a dress code." Naruto said. He swallowed down the lecture he was contemplating giving. He didn't want to tarnish what was remaining of Sasuke's good mood.
"Your family is the only family I know that has a lifetime supply of ramen cups." Sasuke said, finally succeeding on fully zipping up his suitcase. "Whew..."
"Touché, Sasuke." Naruto chortled. "Ha, that rhymed..."
"You're an idiot." Sasuke wandered over to Naruto, leant down, and pecked his boyfriend on the lips. "But I love you."
Naruto flushed with pleasure, puffing up like a proud toad. He was a cocky and self-assured man, but he seldom received compliments from the stoic Uchiha. "Sasuke..."
"And I love you for doing this." Sasuke pecked him once more, this time on the corner of his lips. "I love you...and do you know how I reward those I love who do things for me?"
"How?" Naruto's Adam's apple bobbed as he asked. Swallowing suddenly seemed hard as he gazed up from the ground at the temptress.
"By giving them the best blowjob they've had in a really long time."
"I love you." Naruto said, shaking his head, incredulously. "I love you so much. You and your talented lips. But, before we get down to it...you don't give Itachi blowjobs, do you?"
Sasuke gagged at the prospect, and hurried to their bathroom. "You ruined the mood!"
"Right, sorry...I forgot, I'm your one and only, right?" Naruto smiled cheekily, despite the fact he knew Sasuke could not see it.
The sound of Sasuke retching was his only response.
Sasuke crossed his arms furiously as Naruto all but dragged him out of their car. It had been hard for them to park, considering the amount of cars that were crammed in the street. "I can't believe..."
"Cheer up." Naruto said happily, wrapping a strong arm around his slighter boyfriend. "This is going to be the best pre-celebration ever!"
"I thought it was just us and your family." Sasuke said, barely moving his lips as they both smiled and waved at a waiting Kushina and Minato. "Why are all of our friends vehicles squeezed into this street?"
"Well, I wanted this to be surprise, but since you're so insistent on being a bah humbug, I'll tell you now." Naruto cuddled Sasuke close, breathing in the scent of the strawberry scented shampoo that was Sasuke's guilty pleasure. "We're spending New Years in Tahiti!"
It was lucky Naruto's arms were supporting him, because Sasuke's legs buckled and he nearly collapsed from surprise.
"What?" He was shocked. "Are you serious!?"
"Of course." Naruto laughed at the miffed expression. "I thought it was about time we went on a vacation together. The last time you and I went on holiday together it was Paris, remember?"
Sasuke did remember. It had only been the most amazingly romantic experience of his life. When Sasuke had moved out of home his parents had given him a sum of money to get himself 'situated'. He had protested vehemently at the generous gift, and he had argued until he was blue in the face, but they had still forced the cash into his clenched fists.
The amount of money he was given could have brought he and Naruto an expensive house, but instead they had taken a long trip to France and thoroughly enjoyed themselves; blowing the measly remains on a cheap home when they had returned.
"Qui." Sasuke responded idly. Visions of he and Naruto wading through crystal water filled his mind, and he could almost feel the warm breeze and smell the scent of the ocean. "Tahiti..." He was feeling dazed, as if caught in a day dream.
"Breathe, babe." Naruto slapped Sasuke's cheek softly. "I need you alive if we're going to Tahiti."
"Tahiti..." Sasuke blinked his wide, dark eyes slowly. "I'm going to Tahiti..."
"We both are." Naruto explained patiently. "And we're going to be staying in an overwater bungalow."
Sasuke tackled Naruto into the snow in a messy heap, and began kissing every inch of his face joyously with wet smacking noises.
Naruto bellowed with laughter, and from their spot in front of their household door, Minato and Kushina laughed heartily along with them, making comments about the young lovers.
When Sasuke finally remembered himself, he stood up and patted the snow from his black hooded jacket, regaining his aloof demeanour. "Hn."
"I'll take that as a very well placed thank you." Naruto said, standing back up. His hair was sopping, but he didn't care. He was overjoyed with Sasuke's reaction. "Now let's stop making a spectacle of ourselves and get inside. Everyone is here because we won't be spending New Years with them like usual. It's a joint celebration."
"Usually I hate surprises," Sasuke said, face schooled as they walked the path to Naruto's door. "But I'll let you off the hook just this once. Next time, inform me before you make such a big decision."
Typical Sasuke, once the initial surprise and peppiness died down, he reverted back to his bastard self. "Yeah, yeah..."
"I mean it, Naruto."
"I take it you're quite finished?" Kushina said, with a Cheshire grin. She wrapped her arms around her son, and then Sasuke in a welcoming hug.
Naruto was reminded of how he wouldn't be on the receiving end of such sweet treatment from Sasuke's family. Why couldn't the Uchiha's be a little more like the Uzumaki's?
Sasuke was only reminded of his own mother, who was smaller than Kushina but still hugged him with the same amount of tenderness. When he had first started dating Naruto, he had been awkward with the care he was doled with. He had been astounded with being accepted into their family so readily, especially when they treated him as a second son. As if he and Naruto had always been destined to be together, and Minato and Kushina had known so.
It wouldn't surprise him if they did know. They seemed to know everything.
"I assume you just told Sasuke about your impromptu holiday?" Kushina stepped back, making room for Minato, who also hugged them both. "You can be such a naughty boy, Naruto. I thought we were all supposed to tell him together!"
Naruto snickered at the word 'Naughty' and Sasuke rolled his eyes. "As if Sasuke would allow this to all go unexplained for so long, Mom. He would have sat down in the snow and thrown a big, dignified tantrum until I told him."
"Tantrum?" Sasuke turned on his boyfriend angrily. "I do not-"
"I beg to differ." Naruto said, holding up a finger. "Remember the time Itachi told you that you couldn't attend Suigetsu's pool party because he thought he was a bad influence?"
Sasuke flushed. "I didn't throw a tantrum!"
"Not a typical one, no. You just refused to speak, eat and sleep until Itachi gave in and let you go with a chaperone."
"And how many times have you done that in our relationship? Sulk silently until I give in and bow down to your every command, princess?"
Kushina looked to the side, holding a hand over her mouth to hide the slowly spreading smile she was beginning to sport. Minato looked at his son disparagingly. The two parents were used to the young couple's antics.
"You're ruining it, son." Minato said wisely.
Naruto crossed his arm triumphantly when Sasuke fell silent. He wouldn't have been so smug if he knew the murder Sasuke was plotting in his head.
"WHERE IS THAT BRAT!?"
The raucous yell made Sasuke jump, but the Uzumaki's were used to Tsunade's varying pitches, and didn't bat an eyelid.
"Granny must be getting grouchy." Naruto said, steering Sasuke inside. Immediately, a warm blast of air hit them, and they heard the familiar din of many people conversing at once over the sound of a crackling fire. "Sounds like everyone's here, alright."
Naruto all but bounced into the lounge, where all of his friends had somehow managed to fit in, and remain comfortable despite the close proximity. Naruto's face immediately lip up as bright as the towering Christmas tree in the corner of the room, and he let go of Sasuke and began greeting everyone.
Kushina and Minato continued onwards to the kitchen, but not before both of them gave a wink to Sasuke.
Sasuke didn't even have time to wink back before something skinny and flat collided into him with a high-pitched, unholy shriek. "Sasuke!" Green eyes peered at him, and pink hair obscured his vision momentarily as he was given a bone-crushing hug.
"Sakura," Sasuke wheezed when he was finally released. He didn't know how such a skinny girl was capable of such enormous strength. "Hello."
"Is that all you're going to say?" Sakura crossed her arms underneath her non-existent breasts. "You could at least muster up some enthusiasm."
Before Sasuke could respond, something else – or rather – someone else, collided into him. This time the woman was taller, with silvery blonde hair. She was wearing a skin tight provocative red dress trimmed with Christmas fuzz, which left nearly nothing up to the imagination. When Ino noticed his stare, she stepped back and ghosted her hands down her body, red painted lips smirking. "You like what you see? I'm Santa's little helper."
"You're Santa's little slut." Sakura scoffed, glowering at her best friend. "Do you have no sense of self decency?"
"You're just jealous, broad brow." Ino said, flipping her platinum hair. "So, Sasuke, what do you think?" She gave a twirl, and the dress hitched slightly, displaying more of her long legs. "I'm pretty fabulous, right?"
"You're dressed for the occasion." Sasuke said tonelessly.
"That's not a compliment." Ino said. "Try again."
"Hah! Sasuke doesn't want to compliment you, because he thinks you're a slut as well!"
"He does not. Shut up, forehead!"
"You shut up, pig!"
"Ladies, ladies..." Sai forced his way in between the girls, who had been steadily growing closer with raised fists. "Stop arguing. You're both ugly, disgusting whores."
Sasuke barely left that conversation turned argument with his hearing intact. Sakura and Ino had formed a truce, and decided to start beating up Sai instead of one another.
The next conversation he entered was filled with stuttering and stumbling as Hinata Hyūga tried her hardest to maintain eye contact and speak clearly with the intimidating Uchiha. "H-h-hi S-S-S-Sasuke..."
"Hello, Hinata." Sasuke looked for the tell tale orange jacket of his boyfriend, desperate to have an excuse to get away from the girl. Don't get him wrong, he had nothing against Hinata (okay, maybe he still held a little grudge against her for confessing to Naruto around the same timeframe they had started dating) but he wasn't much of a conversationalist, and neither was Hinata. She was shy and he was secretive, they didn't make for a good pair.
Eerily pupil-less eyes sought out for someone who could also save her from her floundering, but when no rescuer came, the two were forced to continue speaking. "A-are y-y-you excited to s-s-spend C—C-Christmas with your f-family?"
And then there was silence, and eyes gazing in opposite directions as two socially inept individuals tried to keep conversation afloat and resist the urge to run in the opposite direction.
Naruto ended up being both of their saviours, and Sasuke contented himself to watch Hinata like a hawk as she spoke much more confidently to his boyfriend. The conversation was mostly made up with Naruto's inane chattering, but Hinata seemed relaxed with this, and Sasuke eventually wandered off in the direction of the kitchen to fetch a glass of water for himself and Naruto. No doubt the loser's throat was parched from speaking so much.
In the kitchen, Kushina and Minato were cooking alongside one another, and Sasuke started when he saw Suigetsu lounging at the table like he owned the place, tonguing a bottle of water. "Suigetsu," Sasuke said. "I didn't think-"
"-That your boyfriend would invite me?" Suigetsu finished, mouth bulging with the liquid. "He didn't. Mr. and Mrs. Uzumaki did."
"Thank you." Sasuke said sincerely to Kushina and Minato. "Let's go outside. I'm dying to speak with someone who isn't idealistic and optimistic."
Suigetsu shrugged, but stood up. The two of them walked out to the porch, and Sasuke accepted a cigarette when Suigetsu lit up. "I've never even met Naruto's parents, but they somehow knew how to track me down. It's weird they'd incite Naruto's ire by inviting me."
"Kushina and Minato care about me." Sasuke told him. "They invited not only Naruto's friends, but mine as well. Is Karin and Jūgo here?" He was feeling exceptionally fond of Naruto's meddling parents right now. There had been a time in his teenage years when he had begun to spend time with Suigetsu and the two aforementioned.
The four of them had been a pretty ragtag group, and they were at odds with one another more often than not, but it was Suigetsu, Karin and Jūgo's first real friendship experience, and the three had stuck together even after Sasuke had started dating Naruto and had been forced to sacrifice much of his time with them.
"Yeah," Suigetsu exhaled a plume of toxic smoke. "Both of them are in the lounge room. No doubt that boyfriend of yours has already found them and is seeking you out right as we speak." As if in accordance to his words, Sasuke could hear thundering footsteps approaching.
The door was wrenched open, and Naruto glared at Suigetsu menacingly. "What the fuck are you and your little posse of rejects doing here?"
"We were invited." Suigetsu said, not ruffled in the slightest. "Why is it such a big deal? We're Sasuke's friends."
"No you're-" Naruto looked down at Sasuke. He could feel the burn of the burning intensity of Sasuke's glare. "You're right." He amended, face scrunched up as if he had swallowed a lemon. "I shouldn't behave so pettily. We aren't in high school anymore." He offered Suigetsu a hand, and Sasuke chose to overlook the cracking of Suigetstu's knuckles when they shook. "You guys are Sasuke's friends as well. It wouldn't be fair for me to exclude you just because of our personal differences."
"About time..." Suigetsu finished his cigarette and pocketed the remaining stub. "Sasuke never wanted me, you know?"
Sasuke choked on his cigarette.
"Did you ever want him?" Naruto's voice and expression made it plain that Suigetsu's immediate future would be decided by his answer.
"No." Suigetsu gave a theatrical shudder of disgust.
Naruto let out a breath of relief. "Thank fuck."
"You are such a moron." Sasuke seethed. Why was his life filled with overprotective idiots? "I've never wanted-" He stopped himself. There was no use inflating Naruto's head even more. He was surprised the idiot could even fit inside the house.
Anyone but you. You may have wanted me long before I wanted you, but I think I always have wanted you deep down.
Naruto leant over and snagged Sasuke's lit cigarette. He tossed it onto the ground and stifled it with his boots. "Don't smoke. You know it's bad for you. I thought you quit."
Sasuke bristled at the scolding. "I don't remember asking for your opinion, Naruto. You know I indulge infrequently."
"I'll be asking for Itachi's opinion next time I see him." Naruto smiled angelically. When Sasuke scowled, he reached into his pocket and pulled a stick of mint chewing gum. "Eat up, babe. I ain't kissing you when you taste like an ashtray."
Sasuke accepted the gum, and chewed on it crankily, working it around his mouth.
Today is going to be a long day.
"Hey, be careful! You're spilling it in my lap!" Tenten whacked Lee on the back of his head. "Can you try not to be so messy?"
"I apologise, Tenten!" Lee exclaimed, dropping the bottle of sake he had been pouring. "I was just preparing to make a toast!"
Nearly all of the inhabitants of the table groaned, nearly, because Might Guy applauded his favourite former pupil happily, with tears in his eyes. "What a thoughtful and youthful thing to do, Lee!"
"Why is he here again?" Kiba mumbled to Naruto, mouth filled with chewed chicken.
"Because Kakashi and Iruka decided to come, and Lee would have invited him anyway." Naruto muttered back, his own mouth full with ramen.
Sasuke mimicked Tenten and hit both Naruto and Kiba around the back of their heads. He had been the unfortunate sucker who had had to sit sandwiched between the two best friends. "Swallow before you speak."
Naruto obeyed his boyfriend with a mild: "Yes dear."
Kiba rubbed the back of his head, red triangle tattooed cheeks puffed in irritation. "You are so whipped, man. It's bad enough you're ditching us for New Years, but you're seriously going to take that?"
"You're just jealous, dog boy." Ino said, picking at her own garden salad. It may have been Christmas time, but she was not going to spoil her figure. "A foul mouthed cretin like you will never be in a stable relationship."
"Oh and you're any different? Your vagina must be looser than a seventy year old prostitute that's had eighteen babies."
"Not at the table!" Kushina said sharply, overhearing from her spot besides her husband. "Honestly, have some respect."
"You were just as foul mouthed once." Jiraiya spoke up. He had come out of his self imposed exile just to spend Christmas with his beloved godson and said godson's sexy boytoy. If he swung that way, he'd be all over that ass in a second. Yeah, he was an old pervert through and through. "I remember one particular time you cursed Minato for fifteen minutes straight after he was late for Naruto's birthday."
"I remember that as well!" Naruto piped, laughing at the reminder. "Man, was that funny!"
"It was not." Kushina said, frowning at her guilty looking husband.
"Let bygones be bygones." Iruka said. He was sitting besides Kakashi. The latter was flipping through one of his pornographic novels, somehow managing to be completely absorbed in the story but completely aware of what was transgressing around him. "I remember many times we all celebrated Naruto's birthday together." The teacher had always been particularly close to Naruto, almost like a second father/brother figure.
"I remember the time Naruto cut the cake and you told him to kiss the closest boy instead of the closest girl." Shikamaru drawled lazily, indicating to Iruka. "You knew he was gay, even back then."
"It was an accident!" Iruka said, embarrassed by his past blunder. "I knew no such thing!"
"And he kissed Gaara," Temari said. She had been present for that party, alongside her younger brother Kankuro. "As he was sitting right beside him, and then..." She gave a mocking look to Sasuke, ruthless even in her taunting. "Sasuke got all huffy and left early. I guess now we know why."
Laughter erupted around the table, and Sasuke barely refrained from storming off in a huff just like how he had at that eighth birthday party what seemed like so long ago.
Naruto patted Sasuke's shoulder consolingly, and the laughter got louder. Even Kakashi, the apathetic wonder, gave a small chuckle. If they had not been friends and close family, Sasuke would have gutted them all with his fork.
"If we're reminiscing, why don't we look back to the time Temari and Shikamaru were being all secretive about their relationship and we caught them making out at Gaara's eighteenth birthday party!" Kankuro said, eager to get one over on his harsh big sister. "I've never seen Temari abashed before. It was fucking priceless!"
"Language." Iruka chided habitually, ever the teacher.
"Shut up, puppet boy!" Temari whipped out one of her hand crafted fans and slapped her brother on the face. "Or I'll tie you up by some of those strings of yours!"
"Temari, Kankuro, enough." Gaara said in his husky voice, eyebrow-less face grave. "Stop disrupting lunch."
Lunch was huge, with dozens of dishes that catered to each guest's taste. Apparently, each guest had brought a few plates of food to add to the table, but the main cooking had been done by Kushina.
"Can you pass the salt, Neji?" Chōji finally spoke up. Ever since lunch had been served, he had been stuffing his face at a sickening rate. "Please?" Sasuke wished the gluttonous boy was closer, so he could clout him as well.
Neji adhered quietly, long hair swept away from his angled face. He was sat next to his cousin, watching the proceedings blankly.
Chōji poured the salt over his salmon, and munched noisily, more crumbs littering his chubby cheeks.
Karin inched away covertly, before almost tumbling out of her chair when her arm accidently brushed Suigetsu's.
Suigetsu cackled madly, and Jūgo settled for looking exasperated and shaking his head instead of turning into the second coming of the hulk. Sasuke sighed in relief at this, he was capable of calming Jūgo down, but he would rather not be occupied with stopping his impulses on a day that was supposed to be fun.
"Oh my god," Ino followed Karin's suit and lurched in her chair dangerously. "There is a bug in my salad!" She pointed a manicured fingernail at her plate dramatically, and then thinned her lips, rounding on Shino. "I know this is yours! Have you been carrying that bug catcher around with you again!?"
"No." Shino pulled up his long sleeve and displayed the magnitude of bugs that were resting there. "I would never think of confining these precious species."
Lunch was then cut short, and everyone hurriedly vacated the table. All but Tsunade, who had slumped, face down into her meal, after consuming an unhealthy amount of sake.
Lee never had the opportunity to make his speech, but made up for this by blabbering to Guy about the youthfulness of the celebration.
"Present time!" Kushina crowed.
Naruto pulled Sasuke to sit cross legged beside him under the Christmas tree, and Sasuke tried not to look uncomfortable by the crowding. All of the guests (even the hard Temari) had came baring gifts for the two, and now they were going to have to open every single one of them under scrutiny.
"I feel like Jesus." Naruto quipped.
The first present they unwrap is from Sakura, and it is a framed photograph of them as children. Naruto is delighted, and says so numerous times.
Ino's gift to Naruto is a snappy black designer jacket that she all but demands he wear, and Sasuke receives a flower vase that Ino crafted herself. He is offended by the insinuation that he is the more feminine out of the two, but does not say a word, preferring to vent to Naruto on their drive back home after the party.
Suigetsu gives them a set of kitchen knives he crafted and sharpened himself, and Naruto is disturbed with the caress Suigetsu gives each one before he hands them over. Sasuke is used to Suigetsu's love of sharp objects, and nods in thanks. At least now, he would have a decent weapon to threaten Naruto with.
Karin gives him a blue tie that she drools over, and Naruto receives a matching one in orange that she merely wrinkles her nose at.
Jūgo's present is wrapped with care, and Naruto feels bad when he rips through it. Inside is a crafting of a bird, and although Sasuke loves it, he thinks it's ugly.
Shino also gives a crafting, but of a firefly. Jūgo and he share appraising looks, and then begin to speak about their love for flying creatures.
Hinata's gifts are simple and thoughtful, a poster of Naruto's favourite band, and a cook book for Sasuke. Once more, he is offended that he is receiving the girly gifts.
Neji's gifts are as serious and clinical as he is. Two mature books on subjects that would put both of them to sleep, despite Sasuke being quite the genius.
The three Suna siblings give them a joint gift, a set of craft supplies.
Tenten's gift is an encyclopaedia of weapons that Naruto and Sasuke will fight over many times in the future.
Lee gives them an inspirational speech that has Naruto nodding off, and many of their guests shoving fingers in their ears.
Guy follows suit, and mentor and pupil end up singing Christmas carols together with tears streaming down their cheeks.
Chōji gives them a colossal box of chocolates that is opened and mysteriously half empty.
Shikamaru hands them two sleep caps that are used and most likely from his collection. He must have been too slothful to purchase them real gifts.
Tsunade is roused from her slumber and sleepily hands them a first aid book with instructions to learn how to 'fix themselves up' whenever they both have a brawl.
Jiraiya also hands them a book, but it is on sex positions and Naruto gets a nose bleed and waves it around without any hint of shame until Sasuke grabs it and tosses it into the fire.
Jiraiya later sneaks Naruto another copy, and he stashes it under the mattress of their bed.
Iruka gives Naruto and Sasuke a hug and some hand knitted scarves that he apparently took months to make.
Kakashi's eyes don't stray from his book when he gives them both a pat on the head as if they were still children, and two of Jiraiya's books, signed by the man himself. Those books are also thrown into the fire, but are not later replaced.
Kushina and Minato give them a small package that Naruto opens excitably. His parents always give them great gifts, and he is as happy as Sasuke is annoyed when he finds a small, silver camera that is sturdy and apparently unbreakable, yet still capable of capturing clear photographs.
It is charged and opened and Naruto snaps away as everyone poses and smiles (even Gaara and Neji, who do so at prompting from family members.)
"Where's Kiba?" The question comes from Sakura, and everyone looks around the room in surprise. Usually Kiba would be making loud, inappropriate jokes and generally annoying everyone who wasn't Naruto. However, he was strangely absent.
"He must have wandered off in all of the commotion." Sai says, and everyone jumps when they notice his presence.
"How long have you been here!?" Sakura asks. "You've been so quiet; we thought you disappeared after lunch..."
"I've been here the whole time." Sai gives a creepy grin and the whole room ripples with unease, excluding Shikamaru, who had no doubt noticed he was there long before anyone else. "Here is your present..."
It's a sketch of Naruto and Sasuke in an intimate position. When it becomes the third gift to be burned Sai smiles wider and goes back to his drawing.
Attention is refocused once more on Kiba, and when Temari eventually convinces Shikamaru to speak up he tells them that Kiba left just after Sakura had given them their first gift.
Just when Naruto is contemplating going out searching for him they hear the door open and the odd sound of scurrying.
"Is dog boy walking on all fours?" Ino asked curiously. She stood up from her seat on the lounge and peeked into the hallway. Suddenly, she gave a high pitched squeal. Sakura immediately rushed to her side and gave a squeal of her own. The other girls followed suit, and when even Temari gave a lower pitched decidedly un-feminine squeal, Sasuke became curious himself.
Before he could stand up, however, Kiba entered the room. The girls parted for him, and Sasuke saw it.
It being the most adorable creature he had ever seen.
It had wide, expressive eyes, fluffy fair fur and a tail that was tucked under its little legs in fear. Around its neck was a pure pink ribbon.
"Happy Christmas!" Kiba enthused. He bent down and unhooked the brown leash that had been clicked onto the ribbon.
As if sensing who her new owner was, the puppy scurried forward, clumsy paws making her slide a little. Instinctively, Sasuke opened his arms. The puppy rushed forward and began licking every inch of his skin. He giggled at the tickling sensation.
"A puppy?" Naruto voiced. "Seriously, Kiba?"
Kiba nodded with a mad grin. "My mother found her abandoned in a soaked cardboard box." There were coos of sympathy. "She'd been trying to find her an owner, and I thought you guys might like her, so..." He leant in the doorway smugly. "I was right, wasn't I?"
Sasuke didn't reply, too taken with the new puppy. As a child, he had always yearned to have a pet, but his mother and father had always refused, saying animals made messes and were overall troublesome. He supposed he'd never even humoured the idea of having a pet when he moved out of home.
"Well, that gift totally outshines mine." Ino said good humouredly. "Who would've thought you were capable of such thoughtfulness."
Everyone sat speaking amongst themselves for a while, taking it in turns to pat the puppy, she lapped up the attention. Already though, it was quite obvious she adored Sasuke and she would always pad back over to him and collapse onto his lap when she got tired.
When night drew closer and the sky tinted darker the atmosphere changed drastically. The younger guests were becoming more animated, eager to have some alcohol and go out partying, whereas the elders were content to sit and watch their juniors interact.
If Tsunade hadn't guzzled most of the sake, Sasuke was sure the others would have all been nursing glasses themselves.
"What are you going to call her?" Karin asked, rubbing one of the puppy's soft ears. "She's so sweet..."
"I'm not sure." Sasuke admitted. He had been thinking for a while, but so far no inspiration had hit him yet. Every name his mind provided him with just didn't seem to fit. The puppy needed a name that not only represented her, but represented this day. It needed to be meaningful.
"What about Ramen?" Naruto suggested. "That's a pretty cool name."
"You are not naming my dog after noodles." Sasuke said coldly, cuddling the creature closer.
"Oh, so now it's your dog." Naruto said, emphasising the your needlessly. "If I remember correctly, Kiba said she was for both of us."
"I don't see you petting her." Sasuke said, his eyes as frosty as the air outside.
"More like fawning." Naruto snorted, eyeing the creature with newfound disdain.
"You're jealous." Sakura said incredulously, pink hair shaking alongside her shoulders as she laughed. "Oh Naruto, bless you..."
"I'm not jealous!" Naruto crossed his arms childishly. "I just don't see why the mutt gets special treatment!"
"She's not a mutt," Kiba said. "She's a purebred Golden Retriever. I'm surprised anyone would dump such an expensive breed. She's beautiful as well. She'd fetch a pretty penny."
"Why don't we sell her?" Naruto pitched. "More money for Tahiti..." He tried to tempt Sasuke.
The raven haired boy shook his head resolutely. "No. And I hope those bungalows do not have a no-pet policy, because I'm not leaving her behind." Usually, it took months of constant effort for the Uchiha to become even remotely attached to anyone, but he had forged a bond with the puppy so readily. It was somewhat disheartening to everyone in the room, who had had to persevere constantly to worm their way into Sasuke's life.
But they were happy, as well. Happy that Sasuke was happy. It was rare for him to smile so much in one day, especially genuinely.
"Why don't you call her princess?" Ino said. "She is Sasuke's little princess..."
Sasuke scowled in the direction of the blonde haired girl. "No. That doesn't suit her in the slightest."
Suggestions were tossed around the room, the most ludicrous being 'Balls' from Sai, who seemed incapable of not speaking about the male anatomy for one day.
Sasuke disregarded every name, and eventually they all fell silent again, trying to brainstorm any new names.
"Who wants some cocoa?" Minato walked into the room, balancing a huge kettle of the hot chocolate precariously. Beside him, Kushina was carrying a tray of mugs. "It's freshly made!"
Sasuke brightened, and looked back and forth between the hot chocolate and his new puppy, and nodded approvingly. "Cocoa." He said.
"What?" The question came from the room at large.
"Cocoa." He repeated, satisfied. "That's what I've decided her name will be." The puppy stirred slightly, and half-heartedly nibbled on one of Sasuke's fingers, as if agreeing.
"That somehow seems...perfect." Hinata said quietly, managing not to stutter.
"More like girly." Kiba criticised. "I never thought even you could be that prissy, Uchiha."
"I think it is fitting." Lee said, striking a pose. "Do you agree, Guy-Sensei?"
"Yes Lee, yes I do." Guy's white teeth glinted as he struck a similar pose.
"What about Pakkun?" Kakashi said, his voice devoid of emotion.
"That's the name of your dog." Iruka reminded, rolling his eyes.
"All in favour of Cocoa?" Sakura said democratically.
Most hands were raised, and she pounded one fist onto her hand in semblance of a gavel.
"Hey," Naruto objected, mouth agape in indignity. "You turn down ramen, because it's a food, only to name the mutt after a beverage?"
"She's not a mutt. And yes, I like it."
"You are such a fucking hypocrite, Sasuke."
Naruto and Sasuke were passed around like parcels at the end of the early party, and everyone took it in turns squeezing them and giving them well wishes for Christmas and New Years. They would be sorely missed, and Naruto felt teary as he said his farewells.
Sasuke stood beside him uncaringly, consumed by his task of stroking every inch of the slumbering puppy in his arms. When all was said and done, and Naruto had been kissed numerous times by his mother, the two braved the snow outside, and all but ran to their parked car.
During the drive home, Naruto's attempts at conversation were met with vague humming as he was ignored in favour of the new puppy. "Are you planning to take her with us?" Naruto blurted, not taking his eyes off of the slippery road. "Your parents live on a farm and everything, but they do hate animals..."
"They can deal with it." Sasuke said, not nervous in the slightest. "They'll just be glad we're there."
"That you're there." Naruto grumbled. "I'm sure they'll be happier to see that mutt then they will be to set eyes on me."
"Don't be ridiculous." Sasuke said. "Of course they'll be pleased to see you."
"I doubt it."
"Don't." Sasuke's eyes finally strayed from Cocoa and he leant over and kissed his boyfriend hard on the cheek. "You know I love you, and that nothing will ever change that, not our disagreements, not our fights, not my family, and not even Cocoa."
"I love you so much, babe."
So...*peeks out from behind fingers* What do you think? This is really just an introductory chapter, and the next one is when the Twelve Days of Terror will commence!
If anyone is wondering why I added Cocoa, it's because the idea of Naruto and Sasuke owning a puppy makes me melt. And Tahiti? I closed my eyes and pointed to a random spot on a map. At first it was the Indian Ocean, but I didn't think that would work out...
Please review and tell me your thoughts!
I hope you derived some form of pleasure from this.
Have a nice day or night, wherever you are!